Liturgical calendar printer go brrrrrr as the Trans Day of Visibility falls this year on Easter Sunday--and Biden's Twitter handlers clearly had no trouble deciding which should win out. Meanwhile Amazon has abandoned its "Just Walk Out" program, which identified as an AI marvel but was actually just a bunch of guys in India watching you shop. And Soros DAs have come up with a new answer to the housing shortage: just let wandering sex offenders squat in homes owned by law-abiding citizens. When the real thing disappoints, it seems our answer is just to spin up simulations--of sex, of competence, of progress. The fellas trace the common threads, then remind you to read the damn site.