Bodycount, the concept gripping the internet over the last month, refers to the number of sexual partners a person has had. The concepts prevalence emerged through the online RedPill space and has become a key term in the backlash against 'sex positivity' over the last few years. In a dating world now defined by apps, the internet, and, increasingly, a renewed traditional system of sexual value, in what way is 'bodycount' supposed to matter socially? Is it possible to instead think of our sexual partners as subjects, with personal histories that are meaningful, rather than as property or objects?We discuss a 'pro-women argument' for men paying on dates, research that undermines naturalist perspectives on paternity, and criticise evolutionary psychology's perspectives about men and women's different sexual tendencies. We also discuss why some gay people still remain closeted, claim lesbians and gay men are perhaps representative of their sexes preferred sexual relations because they show how each group behaves when unmediated by the other, and consider how late-stage capitalism is beginning to undermine patriarchy. Other topics include casual sex as self-harm, clocking into triple digits at lesbian festivals, polyamory as 'sexual HR' organising people romantically as consumable products, and how those who are 'poly' tend to be dissatisfied and dissatisfying immature perverts who never achieve emotional intimacy with anyone.  We also ask why do gay men not have solidarity with one another in the way straight men do? And whether heterosexual men can ever get over their neurotic retrospective jealousy about their partners previous love lives?