Hello horizontal lovers. horizontal is consensual eavesdropping on conversations about intimacy of all kinds, recorded while lying down, wearing robes. In this and the following episode, I lie down with Kai Mata, Indonesia’s rainbow-toting, openly LGBTQ+ singer-songwriter. She is a thoughtful rock star, an articulate activist, a love advocate, an outspoken woman with a bamboo guitar living a love life of liberation in a country that expects its women to be neither outspoken nor liberated. I love her. And her meter-long hair. Kai wears maroon and black almost exclusively, right down to her motorbike helmet. She displays or wears a rainbow flag at every single show, at every single gig, and she will continue to do so until all of her people are free to love who they love. She battles internet trolls, social media harassment, hate messages, homophobia, discrimination, and erasure by her culture of origin on a daily basis. She is publicly out in a country that persecutes its LGBTQ+ citizens. She is out for all of her fellow Indonesians who cannot be yet, in the hopes of a new era in which they all can feel safe to be. By the way, she’s 22 years-old. I first encountered Kai through a Facebook post she made, raising awareness of the persecution of anybody with a queer identity in Indonesia, and the government’s attempt to slip their discrimination into law. These are Kai’s words, posted on February 21st, 2020: I need your help. Indonesia is trying to label all LGBTQ+ people as deviants dangerous to society, legally requiring us to go to conversion therapy. I am one of the only publicly LGBTQ+ Indonesian Women?‍???. Why are there so few of us? Because my beautiful country has created a society and laws that ostracize and discriminate against my beautiful rainbow community?. This flaming heart breaks with the new “Family Resilience Bill” draft in Indonesia. I am truly in tears. This new bill would define any LGBTQ+ Member as a sexual deviant. It would require mandatory reporting to the government of anyone suspected to be LGBTQ+. Those who are reported would then be forced into conversion therapy to be “treated.” This draft is supported by four major political parties in Indonesia, who claim gays interfere with the future of humanity. It pains me knowing they choose not to realize the humanity within those of us who might love someone of the same gender. And so I sit in Indonesia, my homeland, with the thought of fleeing ringing in my mind, fearful for my livelihood and scared as to how Indonesia can be developing so quickly with its economy and middle class, yet degenerating with basic human rights. What booms even louder than my fear: the recognition of the choice I have to stay, the advantage of an international support, and the privilege of a voice. These laws, regardless if passed, are meant to silence us. And it’s worked at keeping 99% of the LGBTQ+ Indonesians in the closet, frightened by not just legal implications, but the social suicide of coming out and being viewed as the shame of the family. Had I been born in a different situation, I’d be in the closet too. And thus, I am rooted in my country with a clear message. I am Indonesian??. I am LGBTQ+?‍?. And I am proud of both. They can threaten me and tell me I deserve to die. They can put me in conversion therapy or put me in jail. Nothing will change the fact I am Indonesian and I am flaming gay. If you’re reading all the way down here, thank you for listening. I encourage you to please share this message to your friends, family, and anyone you know, especially those traveling to Indonesia. This isn’t a solo project. We need a choir of voices singing this message. Update: please help by sharing (spreads the message for we need the world to recognize what's going on), commenting (it shows support to all the Indonesians like myself who are feeling scared and isolated) and signing this petition: http://chng.it/nGVCh79W2J That’s the conclusion of Kai’s post from February 2020