Ross Patterson, Jarred Taylor, Dan Hollaway, and Jessie Wiseman bring you the realest fake news of the week starting with Green Beret Sergeant First Class Richard Stayskal attempting to sue the Department Of Defense for medical malpractice, the scariest haunted house in the US that makes you sign a 40 page waiver and a doctor's note, the Texas jury who ruled against a divorced Dad trying to stop his 7 year old son's gender transition, The Joker becoming the most successful Rated R movie in history, the 39 dead bodies found in a container in England, and Edward Snowden on Joe Rogan.