Lock Forty: Volume II: John's Redemption

By Raimo Perttu

This volume II of Lock Forty, further portraying John's struggle to develop his canalling business, while raising his young family with Mary, he is also forced to deal with his immediate past and the relationship with Jessie that so seamlessly overlapped with his sudden marriage with Mary. Therefore, he is compelled to seek redemption with his current wife, for whom this unexpected conflict feels like the ultimate betrayal by her husband, whose previous flings with other women in his past, for Mary, became an ultimate test of her redeeming, personal attributes.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Fulton Books, Inc.
• Release date: Nov 9, 2023
• ISBN: 9798889820758

Book preview

Table of Contents

Title

Copyright

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Chapter 10

Chapter 11

Chapter 12

Chapter 13

Chapter 14

Chapter 15

Chapter 16

Chapter 17

Chapter 18

Chapter 19

Chapter 20

Chapter 21

Chapter 22

Chapter 23

Chapter 24

Chapter 25

Chapter 26

About the Author

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Lock Forty

Volume II: John's Redemption

Raimo Perttu

Copyright © 2023 Raimo Perttu

All rights reserved

First Edition

Fulton Books

Meadville, PA

Published by Fulton Books 2023

ISBN 979-8-88982-074-1 (paperback)

ISBN 979-8-88982-075-8 (digital)

Printed in the United States of America

Chapter 1

The exceptionally hot midsummer days were quickly slipping by, and the last Monday morning, before the sweltering August, slid in, making it a bleak beginning for a business week. John and his crew had no major load to deliver other than some small random shipments to keep their many small retail customers happy. The shipping days were becoming even shorter, as the evenings began already to appropriate their longer share of the daily track. A load such as that would not have supported the whole crew, and the time spent on delivering those few items to their recipients would not have made any business sense. Yet there was some hope for a possible major delivery from the southern coal mines to arrive, near Canton for a swap, and that required a possible three-night voyage. With this knowledge in mind, John already prepared Mary for the eventuality that the trip could last even four or five days, in view of the size and weight of the large coal boat. Considering the fact that the departing load, at lock 42, was so light and the need for a full crew to bring the load of coal to Cleveland was not very urgent, John therefore decided to allow his two mule boys to stay in Cleveland and spend some time with a few people they knew from their idle times. There, they would have much time to hang out by the outdoor markets, while they earn or steal their way for their meager subsistence, for their ability to stay alive is quite limited.

Only Mark and Zach as well as James and Larry from the southern treks joined John's crew since the time, when, in the beginning of July, he had to consolidate some of the teams. However, for John, the most emotional part of this consolidation process was when he had to let a few good men go. However, the two new names joining the crew were both trained and well-seasoned mule drivers. As they were also very well familiar with any draft teams, John would use them with his varied loads and boats. Consequently, with the crew so thin, Zach would also join the rest in walking the mules, which often became a problem in passing, for some bigoted hellions frequently had some derogatory remarks about his appearance and personality. This time, however, John decided to choose his battles and not allow such an eventuality to degrade his ability to run various activities on the boat, for Zach, by now, was well-suited for any of those tasks in shipping as well as being also extremely highly skilled in performing his responsibilities. John used to remark that anybody who plays a banjo that well is also well-suited to other activities as a fast learner—and that he was, for Zach's concentration in anything he put his mind into was incredibly efficient.

Momentarily kissing Mary and the baby goodbye, John departed in his normal ways after that short moment for breakfast with his little family. The morning in its smallest details was a typical humid and hazy beginning for some timely activities on the canal. It felt like a tropical Cuyahoga Valley mini-cosmos of summer-shipping season on the canal, lacking clear breeze from any direction, in order for the atmosphere to become more refreshed and tolerable for the canallers to float through. They only had their natural comforts provided by various special circumstance to make the travel and the countless jobs humanly feasible to perform.

Therefore, on this smothering morning, John decided to have Zach behind the mules during the first mile of the towpath. His reasoning for such a choice was that those early Monday morning hours would not provide nearly as many frisky remarks or biting observations from those idle and havoc-brewing minds toward Zach that many of the numb-skulled mule skinners would hurtle in their presence of afternoon idleness. Since obviously their job did not produce enough stimuli for those two cells of their brains rubbing together, their zealous focus often became their opposing mule skinner, with whom jousting was the only way of deciding who was going to give way and to whom. Yet the rules on the canal for that were explicit and clear, prohibiting such dangerous and reckless activities that were liable for endangering innocent lives, in addition to their own and those in the near vicinity of their futile skirmishes.

The fact that this meager load was so scattered and full of small deliveries, it was hard to gauge as to the exact time the stretch between any given locks would take away from John's delivery times. Therefore, he prepared Mary emotionally to otherwise be ready for any possible length of time and not to become overly nervous if he did not return exactly within those usual hours of coffee time, for which John himself always kept such a close account.

Honey, don't worry about me. I am a big girl, and I know how to take care of myself and your baby! Mary often reminded John, for she was quite familiar with the nature of canal shipping. She was well aware that sometimes it meant spending hours in jams at the locks or on the long, open stretches, often caused by minute confrontations of overly heated emotions on a stretch of such a skinny, piggyback of a towpath. Thus, on those potentially dangerous spots on the tow way, those involved sometimes felt that it was important to measure one's manhood with one another than just proceed with their daily chores without labeling each other in different categories. Furthermore, that chosen spot, sometimes, was sufficient only for a flock of geese to speed up for their takeoff or barely be able to land comfortably without injuring their webbed feet on the coarse gravel.

This time, however, the vessel was fully manned by a considerably light crew, as the men were only waiting for John's swift entrance onto the boat and further into the middle cabin, which, for the comfort of the boarded animals, was left fully open at the top and on each sides. Dismounting quickly and pulling the saddle off the back of his horse, John requested Mark to line everybody up on the deck, by the middle cabin for his announcement. Grabbing his hat by the brim while looking for an itchy spot at the back of his skull, he announced, Hey, men! I know, I didn't have a chance to let you know that this next trip might last two or even three times longer than the normal gigs you boys are used to, but as you know, this load is full of small drips of merchandise like buffalo chips spread out there in the range! So you'll have to be carting them around, sometimes on foot, in keeping our retail customers happy!

John's announcement surprisingly did not cause a peep to arise out of those scruffy canallers, who were so happy to be working, at all, while also having a fair-minded man, such as John, for their boss. In addition to that, amazingly enough, most crewmen liked Mark quite well despite his occasional moody spells and the Bible-reading spreads; the latter was less offensive to many, who lived during the wartime terrors and experienced it through their own personal accounts yet had not seen any major miracles coming to their aid in many needs and futile prayers.

I understand that all of you also had a good chance to have some fun over the weekend, so you should be ready and rested to take on this trip, which might even last until this Friday afternoon. So are you men okay with that? John inquired further and called Zach to get the trio of mules into motion.

No problem! No sweat! the men replied almost in chorus, while they acted virtually positive that the news was not negative at all, but it all had a promising ring to it. Everybody on board was a single young man with a viable chance to spend some free time in many of the towns en route to Canton and perhaps beyond.

Good then! Remember, it's never too late to say no to the trip—that is, if some of your girlfriends here in Cleveland don't like your weekly absence! John said as if preparing everybody for battle, which, as such, produced much excitement. And now, you Mark go take a nap! We'll start with Zach's sniffing the butts of those three mules, which, by the way, seem to be well-groomed and well-fed and ready to take us all the way to Akron, where we can swap them to the other three on board! John gave his final directions, telling Zach to push the team into motion. He himself entered his cabin to organize his more extensive than normal paperwork because of the number of small shipments and their destinations.

Okay, Boss! I was just going to suggest the same to you! Had too rough of a night at Sam's last night, and that's only because I broke down and started my bad habit anew, which I had sworn not to begin ever again, for that also pushes me into drinking that beer, which can float me away! Mark complained, also realizing that he had already spoken too much.

So the card-playing is or has been your problem, I gather? John inquired very quickly, not expecting any rebuttal to his mostly rhetorical question.

Yes, but let's not talk about it at this point, for I need a beer to cure my headache! Mark said, indicating his gratefulness to John's observation. Momentarily, he walked off to his cabin to flush down a brown bottleful of that same liquid, which was liable for his pounding headache in the first place, and with that bold action, he was only hoping to find some relief for his splitting headache.

John, in turn, slipped into his cabin for more important activities than Mark's self-indulgence and his personal rehabilitation. Immediately as he sat down onto his stool and after having organized his paperwork, he noted that Melody's schoolyard seemed very vacant; her flower beds seemed utterly untidy, pushing uncharacteristically dense coverage of weeds, which were beginning to take over much of the space for the drooping marigolds. Completely mesmerized by this morose scene, John dug out his pipe and began filling the bowl. Meanwhile, a sudden foul feeling took over his demeanor, and his already-flustered mind sank into another layer of worries, realizing that he had not been paying much attention to his old connections while dealing with his daily problems with business and his flashy personal stunts. Consequently, strong paranoid feelings rushed through his mind, while an intrusive flood of adrenaline caused his muscles to react, pushing his two-hundred-pound body into motion, as he leaped to the gray log, which at this time was held by James.

Hold it, James, take a sharp left, and steer the boat as close to the embankment as possible! John commanded this new member of the crew, the rudder man. At this point, James became fully flustered by John's unexpected urge to shift the whole vessel to the opposite side of the canal. This move was only possible for the reasons that the next oncoming team was not too close to his team, still about two hundred yards away from the school, just past lock 39, at Rockside. It was an unconventional move yet very quick, allowing John to jump off the boat and take a lightning rush across the road, paralleling the canal, directly into the walkway of the school building. Dashing to the front door of the building, John aimed a strong handgrip directly at the large door handle, very familiar to him from those past years in school as he used to be sitting and wearing out those hardwood benches of this small brick building, learning Melody's well-planned lessons of the basics in reading and writing as well as mathematics. He tried it, but it was firmly locked! He rushed to the much smaller door at the back of the building; it was locked too! At this point, John's suspicion grew even stronger, and the image of the thieving hooligans, those idle and trouble-causing souls, ran through his visual imagery like the snapshots of the photos taken after the battle of Gettysburg, clear and expressive.

One will never know to what extent they will exert themselves upon a single defenseless lady in order to gain whatever they want from her! John's thoughts ran randomly and rampantly, adding even stronger pulses of adrenaline into his physical gestures and actions. Finally, the small side door leading into Melody's personal quarters gave John some hope, yet it, too, was locked! What the hell is going on? I've never known or seen Melody's personal surroundings looking so untidy, with an appearance of a tome without a spirit or breath that would indicate a presence of a human being, and especially Melody, who with her presence and personality, normally displaced a spiritual volume of cosmos, at least, for four or five typical humans, who attempted to justify their right to use the communal resources in this presence of their borrowed time! This being John's urgent justification and philosophical contemplation, he began feverishly looking for an access into the building in order to find any signs of Melody, which could have indicated her presence, either still breathing or lying motionless in some corner of her premises.

After giving a sign to Mark to keep moving, John checked out every window and the main door one more time before giving up his further attempts to gain access into Melody's living space. Much mystified, even greatly troubled, John raced after his boat, which seemed to be negotiating the lock at Rockside. As he was half walking and half running, he was able to reach his vessel right after the lock, where he waved his crew to pull aside and allow him to climb aboard. After climbing onboard, John presented Mark with a quick account as to what he discovered, while his mind still kept laboring over the circumstance in order to find a sensible explanation for what could have happened to his former teacher.

Well, there must be a logical justification for all that, for I don't think, in this busy stretch, a prominent lady, such as she, would have just disappeared like a sprinkle of water on the hot rocks! Mark grinned, while he attempted to console John, who, by now, acted as if his wife was again having a baby.

I know, I know! She is a rational woman, but you've seen those punks lately roaming along the canal! They are the products of the war who don't seem to find any vacant spot to land their lazy asses on for any kind of legitimate work, but they just keep wreaking havoc wherever they can, even terrorizing helpless women and stealing anything they like! John cried under visible distress and worry for his special friend in so many different levels.

I've got to find out what's going on. Although I don't see any signs of criminal activities, who the hell knows anymore, for those low-down creatures have become very good at deceiving everybody in their own games! John continued, still in his dark and foul mood. It was also quite symptomatic of his total worldview and his frustrations about his livelihood and other matters, currently and so greatly tearing his soul to pieces, so perfectly sized and ready to be fed even to the chickens in their free-range mode.

Boss, I know it's important for you to know it right now, for you have too many personal feelings and even years, as such, vested in this classy lady, and I empathize with you completely! But by the same token, without you, we would not be able to make this trek, for there are too many details to worry about and too much money on the line to be squandered away! Mark said in a tone that indicated his true worry and ownership for his task and job alike.

You're correct, Mark! I wouldn't just put you en route for any old reason! This would be a full gamble, just to stay behind, running around the empty building like a headless chicken, or at least, I think it was empty. That would put us all on the thin ice, wouldn't it? John exclaimed and tried to calm himself down by looking for trivial chores to do. He was especially making it certain that his fast transportation, standing calmly in his stable and chewing on his cud, was ready to take off at a moment's notice.

You've got it, Boss! In the meantime though, it's going to be hell for you to pay in floating down and up for four or five days without knowing for sure as to the fate of that lady! I know that because I've been in a similar situation many times in my life…and it's hell…but you just have to make do and pretend that nothing bad happened to your good friend, for that's the best way to keep your sanity! Mark remarked in his typical and monotonous voice, which, as such, could function as a sedative medium. An excessive jittery reaction and behavior, in this regard, would perhaps only worsen John's already unstable state of mind.

You're right! But she does have quite a break from school, and she might have taken a trip or something! Although she has never mentioned that she has relatives anywhere else around the country, she could be visiting! John said apprehensively, increasing more complications to his fears.

Well, we'll just have to wait and see, while we hope for the best! Mark said empathetically and added that he would finally take the nap John talked about earlier in the morning.

Hell, no! I know those trail riders should soon be around, and I'll have them check out the whole school building and give us the fresh report as soon as we're back at Sam's place in four or five days! John said with a resolved mindset, yet he felt slightly sad that he personally was not able to find out immediately anything regarding the absence of Melody and the shabby condition of her place and her gardens.

Yeah, you just go and take your nap, and we'll get this boat going, at least, to Boston. However, you might have to come out of your coop, at least, to see the daylight, in case I'll need your help for some important reason! John said, realizing that Mark did not even question the reason why. His eyes were blinking like a mother owl's watchful eyes at night, indicating that the sandman was going to sing him his lullaby while standing on his two feet and talking as if he had a keg full of light beer in his stomach.

Feeling totally inwardly and not willing to expose his gut responses any further, John began preparing himself for some small and select task to appease his talkative friend Ernie at Whiskey Lock. Also, for some small items with the farmers at Red Lock as well as at lock 33, after Red Lock, John had his boys lined up for only a few deliveries.

Fortunately, he allotted more extra time than was truly needed, for his sixth sense was telling him that he might have to take a side flank, off the boat to explain a few personal positions to Jessie, while he set some facts straight with her, which in his mind was one of the most pressing issues out of all his nagging troubles because of lack of any vital information as to her plans for her near future. He knew that Jessie's unexpected new friend had been spending much time in Boston, and he even offered to accompany her for a couple of weekends in Cleveland, to which she had grudgingly obliged. Besides, the fact that their friendship, according to Mark, seemed to have included two—shall we say—personal bodyguards or knightly carriers of weapons, John felt that his position would be better served to be well aware of the eventuality. That could mean that he might find his one enemy in three, with whom he would ultimately have to be willing to test his fundamental manhood.

As the boat approached lock 32, still led by the same team with Zach as a driver, being less than two hundred yards away from the Boston store, John entered Mark's cabin. He bent quietly over his bunk, grabbed him gently by his right shoulder, and spoke. Mark, are you still asleep? I need you to wake up and do me a small personal favor! John said urgently.

He watched Mark opening his eyes, first slowly, but after hearing the urgency in John's voice, he started and stood up erectly and asked a couple of quick and short questions, What…what is it? What do you want, Boss?

Just holding his left finger across his mouth, John hushed Mark and said urgently, Mark, sorry about this, but you know this situation better than anybody else! I want you to walk fast to the store and show me with a hand signal if those three bodies of Jessie are somewhere sitting in the saloon and if she is there or not! John began, delivering a few ways as to how to show him, after the lock, how many of these individuals were present.

Okay, Boss, but next time, please give me a little more time to wake up! Mark said, grinning yet becoming somewhat lighthearted, for he understood the volatility of the situation. He yanked on his cowboy boots, his hat, and his hunting knife, which he often shoved into the top of his high boot, and Mark rushed out of the cabin. He speeded up his walk on the deck and jumped off from the boat onto the side of the sandstone lock, before the boat began to rise up to the next level, while the lock was taking in the extra content of water needed. He shoveled ahead toward the store at a swift clip and entered the premises through the door at the northern end of the building, facing the lock. Standing at the bow, his horse was saddled and ready to jump off the boat, if needed. John became tense and focused, as he remained waiting for Mark's expressive agreed-upon signs.

The boat moved another ten yards, as Mark stepped onto the front boardwalk of the store, signaling John that all four people were inside the establishment. As he was walking back, John acknowledged his message clearly in the language they had just composed. Furthermore, John worked out a quick plan for any eventuality, for he was determined to see Jessie alone. The last time he saw her worn-out face and her beckoning plea for wanting to see him and talk to him—that intense moment made John realize that for the sake of those old times and the true feelings they both had for each other as well as his reputation as a respectable man, he was compelled to do the right thing. It meant that even if he had to jeopardize a few rules of his own codes of conduct, the issues left to be clarified with his ex-lover were very fundamental to his usual code of conduct.

Momentarily, Zach slowed the speed of the boat to a very minimum. At that point, John went to James, who was at the gray log, while Larry helped the lockkeeper to operate the sweeps. Giving James a few instructions, which seemed to sink into his thoughts quite well, John's back was turned toward the store, and consequently he did not see Jessie slip out of the end door onto the boardwalk. However, for some reason, she noticed John's boat only around forty yards away, yet she kept her focus toward the covered bridge crossing the river. With brisk steps, wearing her semi-saloon uniform, she held a bundled newspaper in her right hand, against her breast, moderated her loose dress, and kept it from flying up like a sail in the brisk gusts of wind blowing directly from the southwestern hills of the Boston area river valley. In the meantime, rushing quickly back to his previous post at the bow of the boat, John observed Jessie scooting toward the covered bridge, with a seeming obvious goal to cross it and perhaps continue south, along the tracks toward the small house, where she had her living quarters upstairs, with a little back window across the river, toward the store and the lock.

Zach, stop the boat right after the barn, behind the store! John exclaimed.

As the boat passed the store and the barn, the speed of the vessel was brought to a halt, and John told Larry and James to lay down the boarding ramp directly onto the towpath. The board flopped down with a hefty bang and a blow of dust, and the shoes on the hooves of John's horse were already biting onto the bone-dry boarding blanks, seeking out the balanced steadiness of the board. A couple of clops and off the board, the horse flew like a bewildered hornet, feeling the reins and the bit in its mouth, as John was steering him into a full gallop, across the grass, toward the covered bridge, and after Jessie, who, by now, had crossed the bridge and turned south toward her house.

Boys, I'll meet you before the Cascades. Just keep going and don't forget the business in Peninsula! It's not anything extensive, but it's important! John yelled, as he spurred the horse that was already fleeing in a needless speed to gain a few yards upon Jessie, who was already beginning to slow down, as she recognized the galloping hooves hitting the hard surface of the road. The echo of the steel shoes of John's horse, as they drummed onto the wooden top of the covered bridge, created a scary image; snorting and puffing like a dragon, the tightly reined animal covered the distance of the bridge only with a couple of long strides, making the descent sound like a rolling thunder out of clear skies. During this determined rush, the horse hopped over the long bridge. The wooden pike though unexpectedly came quickly to an end, for immediately thereafter, John had to take a narrow road leading left, along the rail tracks, past a larger house of the two small homes standing side by side on the west bank of the Cuyahoga. This narrow path led John directly to this comfy small white house; of which, the upstairs quarters was Jessie's new residence. Since she returned to Boston from her southern, perhaps New Philadelphia break, Jessie moved seemingly permanently from the main building to this cozy dwelling, which made her feel as if she would have a newly reformed life back here in Boston, wherefrom she could soon perhaps set her sights toward Cleveland, to a bigger world and loftier dreams.

Chapter 2

As Jessie heard and even soon felt the thundering hooves of the horse making a sudden halt, she turned quickly around and witnessed John's beckoning face and the extended right arm as a sign for her to hop and mount.

Jessie, quickly gimme your right hand, grab a firm hold on my belt, and hop on! John urged her very preemptively and held his ride firmly in check with his left hand, on which he had his riding glove to guide better his high-spirited horse. Riding scarcely past the little white house, John made a quick about-turn, and spurred fast toward Boston Heights Road, through the intersection of Riverview Road, heading west, up the valley hill. Thereafter, though, he suddenly turned his horse off the road, onto a small pathway in the woods, which lead to a secluded opening.

During that whole process, no words were exchanged; no questions asked; simply John's initial request for Jessie to mount the horse took place. Only Jessie's familiar, loving, and tight hold around John's waist reminded him so pointedly of those enchanting times in the past. Additionally, she did not have any trouble letting her gentle touches, out of her past habits, to fall naturally farther down than really was required for one to ride snuggly and safely behind the saddle, while holding onto the rider for support. As a result, feeling Jessie's tight squeeze and her warm pressing cheek against his shirt, John almost forgot the reason he picked her up in the first place; his thoughts began to wander excessively in the past, during those years when he felt he had something special with Jessie in this same town, which lately had become a place of inconsequence, through which he only had to navigate to perform his business duties. As he brought the horse to a full halt, John flanked his right arm behind his back, reaching for Jessie. He took a firm hold around her upper torso, snuggly below the breasts, and told her to lower herself carefully down off the horse. After having eased Jessie safely down, John dismounted cavalry style, landing squarely in front of the horse on both his feet. He loosened one end of the reins off a bit, tying it firmly onto the trunk of a small pine tree, to allow the horse a small free range to graze. Meanwhile, as John was performing all these activities so fast and with such a cavalry precision, he left Jessie speechless as she was gazing like a puppy dog with her head ever so often cocked, while she turned in curious expectations, as to what the next matter was going to be.

Offering his firm hand to Jessie, as he was already leading them down a small sylvan pathway, John finally broke the silence and began with a gentle voice. Jessie, you wanted to talk. Therefore, I'll show you a nice, quiet, and neutral place for that so that we can finally clear the air between the two of us. I don't want to continue like this, trying to sneak through the town without upsetting any one of us, Gideon, or those whom you've obviously learned to know after my marriage! John said gently but matter-of-factly without trying to upset Jessie needlessly. That however, by now, was already beginning to wear into the deepest core in Jessie's soul, mounting by the minute, as she felt John's caring guidance and gentlemanly mannerism, just as in those bygone days when the whole world was at their knees, ready to perform whatever she or John wanted it to do. Those gentle touches and his familiar breathing, for a minute, created some hope for the revival of their past dreams, as they were descending deeper and deeper into the misty, fresh foliage of the undergrowth of the deciduous oak, maple, and black walnut jungle. In order to stay on the correct path, they began to follow a small sylvan creek, which made itself ever more present, as it was descending deeply toward another much larger vein of water, making a sharp crook, paralleling the Cuyahoga, and finally, emptying into it in a quiet and serene fashion.

While following the clear path of pure and lustrous silvery creek, the ever-strengthening roar of water ahead began arousing Jessie's as well as John's acute feelings and lofty memories from those times across the valley, by another body of water, a vivaciously rushing waterfall at Brandywine. Under an oak tree, by that water, they spent the most heartfelt and loving moments during their flashy time of courtship in Boston, so what was going on now?

Would those same times, in this unexpected, almost absurd way, reappear and continue, as if nothing had happened? Jessie's playful thoughts were rushing through her mind, as she still continued her silence, for the lack of any real reason to inquire John about their destination or anything for that matter that should follow. During this descent, her total soul was fully engaged. Every cell in her body was becoming satisfied and nourished by just living through those sweet memories, at every stroke from a tree limb in her face, the musty smells of the sylvan undergrowth, the natural freshness of Mother Nature's air rustling trees in the breeze, and the blue skies momentarily peeking its blush of blue into this fresh and misty greenery of the valley woods.

Here—how do you like this? John asked, as he pointed at a descending waterfall, only twenty-five or perhaps thirty feet high yet distinctive and one of a kind, dispensing water in large volumes. It had formed a formidable pond abruptly below the falls. In John's thoughts, this could have conceivably functioned as a secret bathing place for lovers, as if lingering in the original garden without care and sin.

Looking charmed and astonished, Jessie raced to the pool of the waterfall, skipping down with girlish, lighthearted steps and her arms flailing while still holding with her left hand on to the newspaper. As she descended further, she stepped carelessly down onto the natural steps of stones on the lower plane, containing a placid pool of crystal-clear water. This pure spring of silvery liquid was surrounded by the lushly branching trees with thick foliage, a few stocks of water-growing grass, and a completely circled belt of floating water lilies, fully in bloom. With that natural blaze, they were displaying the golden eyes of Mother Nature, on guard, against any outside forces that might disturb the perfect silence of a displaced heaven, only serenaded by her prevailing tones of various birds, insects as well as the gentle rustle of the southwesterly winds.

Careful, you might sprain your doll ankles by flying down like a stork, without the ability to fly! John said in his usual manner, quickly gaining the past demeanor he always had with Jessie, as they used to court in their secret places by Brandywine Falls.

For a moment, just gazing around themselves, drinking and breathing in the most lustrous and gentle atmospheric and rejuvenating elixir Mother Nature could offer, Jessie and John remained silent and outwardly calm, though feeling inertly helpless and unable to bring up their personal problems under such an overwhelmingly ornate and beautiful setting, which was a fraction of heavenly meadows illustrated by many who, in their opinion, had been in contact with other dimensions of the world. Still, the hesitant couple attempted to gain meaningful inner strength and not waste this precious moment without committing themselves to solving their seemingly impossible predicament to each other's fair and manageable future without any influence upon their individual life.

Finally, however, forcing herself gently down onto a slate of sandstone immediately by the edge of the clear pool of water, Jessie sat down by the mirroring placidity of a giant spring, brimmed with water appearing as clear as liquid silver. As she lowered herself down, snuggly onto that smooth slate of rock, Jessie pulled the hem of her light summer dress over her knees and her bare legs, down to her light linen shoes, just slightly the tips of her footwear exposed. In order to make her total position more comfortable, she pushed her chin forward, leaned gently onto her knees, exposed her hair longer than normal. Her hair was left open to breathe in the humid air, creating a condition for it similar to when Jessie used to mention to John at times. See how my hair likes the humid summer air! It always gets curlier, and it feels much more alive than in the wintertime! Yet only in thoughts and memories in their hearts and minds, they both were having a vivid conversation; they were exchanging pleasantries, sweet and polite remarks about each other's positive traits. But at this moment, neither one was willing to break through the imposing solitude. This unwillingness was in regard to those soothing and caressing natural symphonies of the surroundings, or the moment—they somehow knew—would be unique and would last only to have a few minutes' worth of bliss that they used to enjoy in each other's embrace during their escapes into various hideouts in the hills of the Brandywine ravines.

However, in the midst of the paralyses of their momentary psychological state of mind, suddenly, a large raven landed at the top of an oak tree, which provided much cover and protection for that particular spot. Squeaking loudly and disturbingly while rudely breaking the total silence, which continued with a large flock of red-winged blackbirds, the raven rocked and swayed on the bouncing branch. Yet momentarily swooping through the foliage, out into clear blue skies, only leaving their choral screeches of hundreds seeking one another's airborne company, in a cohesive and meaningful flock, the red-winged blackbirds descended into the simmering blues of heavens like a giant swarm of large bees leaving their colony in a flash of fright.

You wanted to talk? John said abruptly but in a soft and civil tone of voice, which made Jessie slightly startled, only allowing her to answer in a primordial and guttural fashion uh-huh while pushing her chin ever deeper between her knees, as she was staring blankly into the pond, which was mirroring a small blue spot of the cloudless sky that was visible directly above the pond between the large oak and another somewhat smaller maple tree. As a consequence to Jessie's passive behavior, John began walking a few steps toward her from his position of about fifteen yards away, toward the gushing falls, with the flowing mirror of silvery water like a giant mirror as a background. After a few appointed steps, he knelt down onto his left knee, while he left his right knee up for a support of his hand. He also took off his hat, and characteristically, for him, he combed his hair back with his fingers. Ready for any discussion and his mind fully focused on the situation, John asked briskly, So what about?

Still sinking deeper forward, Jessie was also reaching for a large ripe bloom of water lily, glowing beamingly its brightness and practically showing artificially its perfect, glowing colors: bright yellow in the middle and flanking that golden center as if protecting its purity with a perfect and blearing circle of bleach-white corset of blooming petals. She reached for that specific and most perfect specimen and pulled it gently up, slightly less than a foot out of the water. Thereafter, she cut it clean off by using her well-manicured fingernails. First, taking a slight smell of the faint center, directly under her nose, out of the golden heart of the flower, then offering it to John by holding gingerly onto its fragile stem with both hands' fingertips, Jessie burst into heartbreaking sobbing, quickly flooding her already blushing face with welling tears, which she never in the least tried to stop or wipe off. In this manner, the sight of Jessie, for the first time for John, so true, so unpretentious, and laced with feelings, affecting and even afflicting him in so many levels, nearly caused him to become lost in the moment's charm that he was about to enclose that familiar, beautiful, and suffering face into his protective embrace. However, that would have meant committing himself into a dangerous mindset of consolation, which could have had conflicting and lasting consequences in his already fragile psyche. Instead, John stood up and clumped his hat on, simply adjusting it by the brim, in order to regain his previous demeanor. He stepped back a couple of feet, only remaining, for a moment, without words or any gestures. Composing himself further, he began talking with a low, consoling manner.

Jessie, my dear, please it hurts me to see you in that way! I've never seen you appearing so conflictingly sad, so bothered, and so full of nonverbal questions! Please try to look at me, into my eyes, and perhaps…you are able to find the truth! I still care for you, but can't you see? We can't be together anymore, and we should not be seen together in public, for you know—I am in love with another woman, Mary! We are married now, and we've been together for over two years! And you also know we just got our first beautiful baby, and I can't be running around trying to sort out my feelings between two women, for I also have so many other problems to deal with, John said with a higher tone of voice, becoming more assertive in his demeanor and decisive gestures. With this mode in his behavior, perhaps only two women in his life knew well, and they also understood that there was no denying or retreating in any issues once John had made up his mind to follow his ultimate path.

Still offering John her water lily while shedding tears, which were becoming modified after his firm appeal, Jessie took a few more steps to the left and sat on an old nurse tree, lying flat on the moist silt yet supporting a healthy growth of moss and other symbiotic plants. The seat on the soft moss was more comfortable than the hard slate of sandstone that also was available near the fallen tree; therefore, Jessie chose to become more restful, as she was expecting a longer and a deeper conversation to sort out their past.

John, dar—oh dear! Jessie said, as she startled in her cumbersome conversation. Her words did not want to slide the way they used to, when she never had a problem in starting, continuing, or ending any conversation. Wiping her face and nose with the back of her right hand, as her wild hair also was blown into the mix of her teary face and her uncontrolled choking in-breathing, Jessie sat on her newly chosen seat. Finally, she took a deep breath and attempted lastly to connect with her ultimate and understanding sister, Mother Nature. In this fragile moment, Jessie attempted to navigate through the soft comfort and earthy smells, which the nurse tree was emitting while festering profusely on her own slow but ultimate and final route to the bosom of that same omnipotent lady and her realm, in which there is eternal and true control within all matters between birth and death.

But…but you found her so quickly, and suddenly you were married, as if I did not even exist nor mattered! With a quivering chin, stumbling words, and the alternating voice, Jessie attempted to gain some composure and enough significance to her manner of words that would somehow express her still strong feelings toward him. Yet she realized that the discussion of the past would be entirely in vain. The reason for that was the news she was about to deliver under great stress, haphazardly, as somewhat of a desperate defense; still it would mainly function as an offense, for the way John would perceive her quick blurb, which would not create a correct perception upon him, for this man, an ex-cavalry horseman, was used to talking matters out loud and clear and direct to the point. Yet John was merely standing and, at times, leaning against the straight trunk of a young pine tree, just listening and holding an empathetic demeanor while trying to figure out the best way to help Jessie in her true emotional debacle and her possible practical problems, which seemed to become the dictates of her immediate life.

Nevertheless, Jessie…granted, we did seem to have it all, nicely and neatly tied up in a small bag of sorcerer's tricks! However, you never revealed much of yourself to me, which to you did not seem to matter, but for me, you know how I am. To me, it was important to know what I was dealing with! As you know, I also wanted something very concrete from your life, but you always told me point-blank, ‘There is nothing to tell!' John said, getting slightly irritated, the way he always used to with Jessie, when he felt that he never was able to penetrate the surface and the artificial glow, in which she attempted to lead their relationship without seemingly much deeper commitments. In John's mind, that style was like a hummingbird hovering from flower to flower, sucking their nectar in attempts to gain more weight for his long flight of migration to the south, away from the cold, the ice, and ultimately from any responsibilities. All these seemed to be the factors that the little bird could not take upon herself because of the nature of her place in the universal pecking order.

John, you were and are the most honorable man I've ever known! I always trusted you and your calmness to be okay with what I had to say about my past! But guess what? There still is nothing to say about it—at least, that you would be interested in, Jessie said, paused, took a long deep breath, tipped, and tilted her head clear back, making her hair flow directly past her shoulders, as she exclaimed, John, I am pregnant, and I think that should make it for me. From this point on, my life should become much more complicated now, don't you think?

"Oh, that's nice. Congratulations, so who is the lucky man and the future dad?" John flared up like sunshine and did not even try to pay attention to Jessie's last exclamation. Just looking relieved, he was naturally thinking that Jessie found somebody as a committed partner, and the whole of this act was just her clumsy way of coming to terms with the fact that she perhaps had become tied down too soon, and her companion was not showing enough interest or ability to pull her out of the public eye in the Boston saloon.

This situation, from this on, is not the best environment for an expecting mother in trying to earn her livelihood, and neither is it for the baby if it's the only environment to grow up were John's quick thoughts. He also realized that his situation with Mary at their new home with the baby should have been the envy for any people in Jessie's position.

Turning her sights away from John's keen gaze, Jessie stared at the ground, while some growling ants were indicating a definite order in their lives as insects being happy and competing for one another's charm and popularity, indicating to Jessie their definite life order. As John was listening to Jessie's talk, he was becoming ever happier about his personal situation. He stepped closer to her and asked her to speak more about her situation, while perhaps he could deliver a few words of encouragement and consolation. John knelt down in front of Jessie's nervous and jittery demeanor; the face that was beginning to look evermore puffy and haggard was quickly beginning to lose the luster she had before they started their serious conversation. She appeared to have only a fraction of the vivacious demeanor that she used to have as the leading queen of a town that held her in such high esteem because of her personable healing skills, as at the moment, the weight of the issues at hand began to disturb and even ravage her sensitive soul.

Speak to me, Jess, speak to me, John urged vehemently, as he reached out to her face, while he held gently her chin between his right-hand pointer finger and the thumb in attempts to redirect her crying eyes to his own field of vision.

Jo-John, I can't! Jessie cried and slowly turned her tearful eyes toward him as if asking for understanding and forgiveness but also the ultimate answer to why.

What is it? Why can't you? John insisted and pulled his reasonably clean hanky for excess sweating and began gently and softly drying off the ever-flowing tears on Jessie's cheeks.

But…but, John, you don't seem to understand. I said I am expecting a child, and you just displaced your part to something much more lighthearted! John, please gimme your left hand! Jessie insisted, while she gently put her moist right hand onto John's and pulled it slowly onto her tummy. There she held it for a moment, while she broke into much harder and more heartfelt sobbing. This in the past, during the height of their amorous courtship, would have softened and even shattered John's emotions as well as his firm grip onto his manhood. However, a couple of years had gone by, and he was forced, with the advent of his own baby girl, to be engaged in his own marriage. That took all the strength and might of his emotions as well as his business, which mostly preoccupied his mind, leaving no time for any flings or other idle activities. Thus, this moment left John with a cool demeanor, making him act as if it was just one of those factors in life that happen to healthy young women.

Yeah, but isn't it usually polite for one to ask these questions of a good friend, who cares so much about your welfare and, especially, your future plans? Right now, it seems to me though that there is nobody else involved, and you are just hanging onto that job at the store and the saloon, which, in my thinking, is no place to raise a child at especially just by yourself. Besides, right now, where you are and in the condition you seem to be—and I am not trying to criticize your lifestyle—it seems to me that you are going to bring that child out to a harsh, lonely world, in which there is no mercy for those who have seemingly stepped over their social boundaries, John said, getting too highfalutin in his nearly patronizing manner of discussing the immediacies of Jessie's life to come.

But…but, John, that's not quite the case! Jessie sobbed and attempted to gather all her forces out of her psychological and the physical realms to urge herself to break the news to John. This however, at its face value, would never have fit the world of John's troubles or perhaps, good fortune had it not been so abrupt, intimate, and fundamentally personal.

What…what's not the case? Jessie, look at me…deeply into my eyes! What are you saying? What are you suggesting? Oh no, the baby! Don't do this to me! John bellowed in an acute panic yet recovered quickly, especially defensively, as he began his intense questioning and interrogation of Jessie, as to her explanation of the true connections with the baby.

Uh-huh, yes, the baby is yours! Jessie gathered her last physical and emotional strength that her demeanor afforded her, as she started humming through her closed mouth. Stumbling and laboring with the few words that she was able to produce in such an intimate and fundamentally amorous situation, with John's almost thunderous gaze upon her, stirring up her emotions, Jessie felt as if being stuck onto a giant clock pendulum in a high tower with no place to hide or fly off to.

Oh, Jesus and Holy Mary, Jessie! Don't put me through this flimsy cotton gin of yours. Can't you come up with anything better than that? John cried and rose to his feet to walk a couple of tight circles, only to kneel back down in more furious state of mind. He stared at Jessie's demeanor, as she was gazing at her sobbing face, which was stooped over toward the moist, fresh, and odorous earth, while seemingly having her clear connection with Sister Nature, to whom she was sending a few quiet appeals and prayers in order to find some equilibrium for her throbbing soul. This—Jessie's touching demeanor—caused John to inquire. Is that the way you are trying to make me love you again? Jess, it's too much time since you and I were a true couple, and many things have happened since that time. Also, you should understand, I have a life of my own, and I have vested a lot of effort in that to make it work! Therefore, I can't—I should not—and I am not going to jeopardize my current situation with my past actions, for which I have no regret! John exclaimed and encouraged Jessie to stand up and go clean her smoldering face with that clean pond water and begin her story with clear words and no assumptions.

Walking and dragging slowly toward the water, Jessie knelt down, scooped a few handfuls of that cold, clear, and refreshing sustenance of life. She held her scooped hands, for a moment, over her teary red face, while she allowed the water to flow directly down her cheeks, exposed neck, and down into her cleavage. Those hefty streaks of liquid moistened her breasts inside and outside an almost transparently light upper top, which displayed her protruding and fully swollen nipples out to the world but, at the moment, only to John, who still became mesmerized by her fresh and earthy beauty.

Becoming ever calmer and composed while slipping back into her more normal demeanor, Jessie sat down onto a larger stone, flat at the top. It allowed her to feel more balanced and comfortable than on those previous stones, which required special skills of her—that of a conjurer—to feel comfortable in discussing the most serious issues of her life thus far. Yet still wiping her face both ways, from side to side, Jessie also wiped each of her eyes to clear off some of the long-gone mascara that still bothered her clear vision. This allowed her to begin slowly, with a calm and low voice. She quickly summarized her life, in large segments, with little or no remarkable details. Yet all the while telling her side of the story, she kept emphasizing that she felt John abandoned her with no clear reason and left her brokenhearted, wondering aimlessly through her lonely existence, without any final explanation from him as to the irrevocable freeze to their most wonderful relationship, according to her account. Momentarily though she began approaching the pinnacle of the deliberate account of her immediate past, and abruptly she came to a halt, taking a few deep breaths, still wiping the last pearls of her exhausted and water-mixed tears, acutely searching and choosing the right set of words. Then Jessie began with a short and softly spoken statement. John, the baby is yours, and I've had a perfect and complete checkup by a doctor, Mr. Watson, from Hudson, and he has confirmed everything is working fine and normal. The baby is going to be born sometime in the middle of January! Jessie said slightly invigorated, while she also became more assertive in her communication process, as she was even showing some motherly glow in her slowly brightening face. By the way, Gideon has been like a father to me. And since he knew Mr. Watson and his wife, he arranged all my appointments at his own cost! Jessie spoke with a glee in her eyes, as she recounted Gideon's charitable work and his extraordinary commitment to hold on to Jessie and her invaluable services, still, as his best worker and often the brightest emotional spot in his life.

Uh-huh, that is such heavy text through and through. John began but remained quiet, realizing that Jessie was recounting her past in very definite terms, including him in the course of her recount as an important part of the total picture, which, in the case of reality, would require him to be responsible for the resulting details.

Yes, I believe, and why shouldn't I? You are a healthy and beautiful woman, so why not? I believe you. But the question is, Who is the father? John repeated himself, while he began to sound somewhat incohesive and ever more defensive.

But why do you think so? Is that because you still truly want to be with me and love me, or is it that you just want to cause trouble for me and Mary, 'cause you see us happy with a bright future? John asked bluntly, yet he was talking to a quiet, fragile woman, who was seriously adrift and worried about her immediate future.

Within past years since before John's marriage, she experienced so much love and so many special and positive things, which, in that regard, were the reasons that brought all the best human traits out of Jessie, benefiting many of those who had an opportunity to socialize with her on a day-to-day basis. Yet this unknown, unstable presence and the seemingly great betrayal for her future had thrown her normally cohesive and focused mind into such disarray that her total demeanor toward John became estranged and foreign, in her thoughts and portrayal of herself. Also, her physical appearance changed from a lustrous woman into a much older-looking servant woman, which, naturally, to the greatest extent, could be attributed by her expectancy and the deep worry for the future of the baby without a husband to share in her happiness or to secure her future.

"Besides, I can understand your feelings in bringing a child into this world without a husband by your side. In this town, that would not be an easy, respectable, or even expected thing to do! With those thoughts in mind, I fully want to share in your frustrations, but, Jess, I know you better than that. You will not put that on me or on us, just 'cause you want to punish me for getting married so suddenly without much dialogue or advance notice to you. However, you should also know and understand, we had such a period of time when we were not communicating properly! Yes, our physical togetherness was great, as always, but, Jessie, we were not talking anything about real important things that mattered, and you always hesitated to be up-front about your true feelings and your past, which mattered to me a lot!" John insisted ever more forcefully, in trying to justify his marriage to Mary, which, on the most important level, was not explainable to Jessie. It only made everything much more difficult, even unfairly so, for John to be able to clarify and convey his feelings to Jessie.

Anyhow, John, you always seemed so happy with me, and I know our shared moments to reach our ultimate peak, where our souls truly came together, were always so perfect and without any interpretations or questions, as we both seemed to reach and find what we were looking for during our intimate moments, weren't we, John? Jessie reminded him of their perfect moments together, yet at the same time trying to build up more reference, momentum, and support to her assertive demeanor to speak the truth in making John understand and own up to his responsibilities.

Jess, I know, we were together quite intimately at the time I pulled you onto my boat last spring in Boston before Red Lock. But I also know I was not in you long enough! You felt it, as I recall, but Jessie, for me, it was not enough! John insisted, while he grew more agitated with her whose demeanor unexpectedly turned colder, more emotionless, and strangely matter-of-fact. Her reaction was like