Empath of The Empire

By Scott Mathewson

There once was a mulatto child abandoned to a world that was unprepared to receive him, and for that, his heart was broken. He was rescued by cult leaders who feared for him and the world he would come to inhabit. Although his powerful imagination brought everyone joy, he never found peace among them, so he longed for death once he learned of it.

This was when the institutions of the world stepped in to save him from himself and the cult. The institutions educated him on the ways of the mind, from which he began to connect with a mythology of spiritual beliefs. But still, the original heartbreak was never addressed.

Then one day, his mind and emotions overcame him, manifesting in self-destructive insanity. After all the horrific spiritual torture and abuse he had endured, his feelings of hopeless abandonment and his whimsical desire to dream/play had become corrupt. His narcissistic guardians had, from so young, conditioned him to believe the world was ending, and so he would initiate it by burning down his hometown.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Page Publishing, Inc.
• Release date: Aug 28, 2023
• ISBN: 9798889600466

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Empath of The Empire

Scott Mathewson

Copyright © 2023 Scott Mathewson

All rights reserved

First Edition

PAGE PUBLISHING

Conneaut Lake, PA

First originally published by Page Publishing 2023

ISBN 979-8-88960-036-7 (pbk)

ISBN 979-8-88960-046-6 (digital)

Printed in the United States of America

Table of Contents

To the reader

You're welcome!

Introduction

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Bioengineering

Chapter 6

Perception

Chapter 7

Empath of the Empire

Chapter 8

Omega

Chapter 9

A Soul Becoming God (the Way)

About the Author

To the reader

You're welcome!

Introduction

Once upon a time, I suffered in great silence, but now my story shall be told. This is the story of how one abandoned, disadvantaged human found enlightenment. We are all reflections of each other; we perceive ourselves in and through the other. Personally, my life began in a bubble, and after I learned the ways of my immediate community, I had to move on. There were just some things I could not understand from within an isolated social collective, especially if I were something new.

Despite how much research and Internet searching or YouTube videos you watch, our information is relative to the vantage through which we perceive it. Even if we were to just simply take a journey and return, our awareness expands. When hindsight is twenty-twenty, to step outside of our experience serves to facilitate a perception of a much larger spectrum—the forest or the trees. It's obvious with the little things sometimes, but maybe not so obvious with our subjective personal lives.

I have learned a lot of things in my humble journey, about the world, society, and most importantly, about myself. Without intending to come off as contrived or pretentious, I would like to share the knowledge that has helped me. I am no guru, no hero; I claim not to have the answers, even, for what do I know? Yet ideas hold more power and utility when presented with context, I think, so let me tell you my story so that you may see yourself and your own wisdom emerge.

Often enough, people express some sort of sympathy, or sadness, when they get to know the details of my story. While yes, on the surface, it appears painful and the me who experienced those things was uncomfortable, it was also all I knew. In hindsight, however, considering the circumstances, I've had the most nurturing childhood I possibly could have had. While it took me some time to realize this—a few decades have passed—I can barely understand what I really had gained. Ideally, we all could look back at our experiences and see how they not only shaped, empowered, and prepared us for today, but they might potentially even make for an interesting story.

Life is all about one of many things, opportunity and experience. I have found it to best serve me, too, when I am able to entertain myself. They say one's life flashes before one's eyes—the mind, yes—when one dies. I hope it's an entertaining reel of experiences to say the least.

Chapter 1

Bright raging fires pierced the dark sky as they engulfed this old abandoned building. A home that sheltered a family from infancy to old age; from birth to death, it had once been a sanctuary of life. Now, quickly, it's being devoured by flames. Flames that started in my heart, emerging to illuminate my own darkness.

Escaping the city, we raced out through the countryside, a bright full moon playing peekaboo behind soft soaring clouds. I was driving like 80 or so, but I've grown to somewhat know these roads. Blasting music and downing cheap booze, Stan and I laughed together wildly.

Throughout our childhood, we'd always been confined and sheltered. Both of us were raised in the same religious cult, so together, we'd never felt as free as we were these days. I was only seventeen, Stan a year older than me, but I'd seduced a twenty-one-year-old woman to lend me her car. She'd bought us this booze, too, so our adventure began.

There was always this underlying tension that I felt with Stan, I think it was mutual. Both of us felt unused to not being controlled, but with an eager desire to lose control. On previous nights of getting stoned or huffing gas, we'd take turns car surfing at these same dangerous speeds.

One night, I ran into a ditch, disorientated behind the wheel, throwing Stan into a corn field. We staggered up to the only home we could see for miles, to be met at the door by an old man with a pistol. Our parents were contacted and the car was towed. My parents scolded me for being a bad influence on him, while his parents did the same to him.

But tonight, we'd decided to explore one of those old condemned and abandoned, country homes. We were curious about the world that had been kept from us—exploring and testing boundaries of almost any nature. Maybe this was the source of tension we felt. Two calm time bombs, waiting to explode into existence. Here we were, experiencing the same world everyone else was in but without any context.

When we pulled up to the house, clouds hid the moon and we were shrouded in darkness. Concealed by night, we busted a ground-level window open and made our way in. Drunk as f——, we wandered around using a flashlight. This house was attractive; the stairway wall had been wallpapered with pictures out of nudity magazines. Who lived here? I wondered as I discovered Polaroid pictures of nude young women in what appeared to have once been a bedroom.

When I found a broom downstairs, an idea hit me. I lit the bristles of this straw broom and created a tiki-like torch. The home lit up; I could see Stan's face. He, too, was in awe and curiosity. This was an adventure; these two life-deprived boys felt alive.

Good idea, Stan said to me.

We wandered more, exploring the home with interest and curiosity. But then my torch came into contact with an old and dried-out curtain. Just like that, it erupted into a blaze, and the room was quickly illuminated. With it came a surge of adrenaline, the fascination with fire, and the threat of danger. It was a rush and I felt so alive; it triggered something in me.

Armageddon was upon us; I'd been eagerly anticipating the end of this world. With all those images of destruction filling the pages of cult propaganda, I suddenly felt activated. The world was ending and this was my participation. I began lighting other parts of the house until it was engulfed in flames. This was exciting; we were out here in the world and nothing could stop us.

Aware of our own safety, we fled the house and got to the car. Staring back at our house of fire, both of us watched in awesome silence. Then off we flew back to town, hyped from what had just happened. We shared our thoughts about it.

Then we pulled up to the house, where the party we left was still going on. Once inside, we resume our usually reserved nature because we were outsiders anyway, and now, we had another dark secret. I gave Alex her keys and opened another beer. Stan found his girl and nestled up beside her.

Where did you guys go and do?

Nothing, just a country drive.

Manifesting

I close my eyes and a soft pale gray shadow emerges from within the darkness beneath my eyelids. A vapor rolls through faint milky shades and finally spills out all over my brain. When I focus into this hazy empty space, I notice little lines, like tiny vertebrae running over everything, pulsing little highways, sparking twitching ever so subtle, and seemingly random at first. And from each twisting spine, sprouts another winding appendage. I gaze in awe as these spines rise from the surface, and in a network of veins, each one subtlety takes on small-banded stripes that glow iridescence, in every color.

Absorbed as I am, I can only watch as these skinny electric lines become three in their dimension. They now separate from the cloudy pale iridescent space. As you further examine them, you would see they seem to heave in unison with every breath I take. Spinning fractals that fold within themselves, gracefully collaborate into forms of various structures that seem to resemble so many familiar things. Grand architectures, monumental temples.

Then in an all-too-soothing secret language, I feel my thoughts extend out as if they were everything. Every minuscule little detail expanding outward in rays, spirals and waves. There is no end to this world that I can perceive of. A living network of memories and dreams, intricately detailed in silicone thread this soft persistent web, beckons me. So delicate is its appearance, yet its massive presence speaks of solid immortality. At first, I feel small and yet not at all, in the light of this great thing. Then suddenly as if it were conscious of my eyes peering into it, as if I whispered my very thoughts into its divine ears. It sees me—they see me.

*****

I was born in March when the death of winter morphs into the birth of spring. From the end emerges the beginning, illustrated in Earth's natural cycle; this pattern is seemingly as old as the earth itself. This made me a Pisces, two fish swimming in opposing directions but tied at their tails, and this is my tale. My human experience this lifetime began with upon an earth in flux. Arriving at a time of change and rebirth, this would be how I'd come to understand life. Everything is unstable from the beginning.

Inside a little space we call earth, a young, beautiful, fair-skinned White mother gave birth to a copper boy. She held him there desperately, tight against her throbbing heart as she cried. Her helpless eyes fell warm salty tears, down his peacefully sweet, naive face.

Benjamin, she whispered, softly stroking the delicate head of her newborn miracle. I am sorry. I am so sorry. I don't want to let you go, but you will be safe somewhere else, with someone else. My special child, I love you so very much.

Young lady, a nurse spoke up, it's time now. We must take him. Please don't make it harder than it has to be. Just comply. This is for the best.

A young White mother gazed down at her little colored boy once more and whispered into his ears, "You are something