St. Patrick and the Helicopter: Theological Stories and Reflections for Young and Old

By William Loader

This book comes from the playground of imagination. It is the work of a leading international specialist in New Testament studies with a passion for making the findings of New Testament research accessible for a wide readership. From children's stories to liturgies, poems to subversively provocative fantasies, it invites the reader to play, to reflect, and to be confronted.

This is a book to keep coming back to, rather than one to be read from cover to cover. It invites the reader to engage issues at the heart of faith and disbelief. It is a rich and challenging resource for personal and for group reflection. Some pieces will serve well as discussion starters. Some are for storytelling and celebration, including children's stories with subtle hints for adult minds. Others belong in the context of worship. They are grouped broadly according to the church liturgical year: "Around Christmas"; "Around Easter"; "Around Pentecost"; and "Any Time." Come and read! Come and play!

• Language: English
• Publisher: Resource Publications
• Release date: Jun 29, 2023
• ISBN: 9781666775716

William Loader

William (Bill) Loader is Professor Emeritus of New Testament at Murdoch University, Perth, Australia, and a Minister of the Uniting Church in Australia. He is the author of major research monographs on the Christology of Hebrews and the Gospel according to John, Jesus’s attitude towards the Law as portrayed in the Gospels, a series of volumes on attitudes towards sexuality in early Jewish and Christian literature, and extensive online resources accessible through his home page at Murdoch University.

Book preview

Around Christmas

1

A Very Special Baby

The Christmas Story for the Very Young

PART ONE

Once upon a time there was a very special baby who grew up to be very wise and to tell us how to be kind. His name was Jesus. Mary and Joseph were his mummy and daddy.

One day they set off to travel to a place called Bethlehem, up in the hills.

They didn’t have a car.

They didn’t have a bus.

They didn’t have a train.

And they didn’t have an aeroplane.

But they did have a donkey. It was a long way.

Mary sat on the donkey and Joseph walked next to the donkey.

When they got to Bethlehem, they were very tired, and Mary was about to have her baby. They went to the hotel, but the man at the door said: Sorry, no room today. All booked out.

Mary and Joseph were very sad; so Joseph said to the man: Please be kind to us. Mary is about to have her baby. Can’t you find a place for us?

Well, said the man at the door, I suppose you could go and sleep with the animals.

Ah, thank you, said Joseph.

And Joseph and Mary went around the back of the hotel.

There was a big gate and behind the gate were lots of animals.

Some of the sheep were fast asleep; and when Joseph and Mary opened the gate, they woke up and said, Please be quiet! We’re asleep!

The cow smiled as she chewed her cud and said: There’s not much room here, I’m afraid.

The donkeys said: Hurrah! Here’s another donkey! They were kind and made Mary and Joseph’s donkey feel very welcome.

The rooster jumped up onto the feeding trough, scratched among the straw, and said: You could sit in here if you like!

Mary smiled. I’m too big to sit in there, but you have given me an idea.

With that she lay down on some straw and out came her baby. He was so tiny. Mary gave him a feed. Then Joseph took him up in his arms and put the baby Jesus just where the rooster had said.

The rooster was so proud, he cried: Cock-a-doodle-do!! three times.

The sheep looked up sternly at the rooster and said: Please be quiet! We’re asleep!

Soon everyone was asleep: Mary, Joseph, baby Jesus—and nobody heard that the cow snored.

PART TWO

Meanwhile up on the hills, there were some shepherds. They were looking after the sheep that were sleeping outside under the stars. They were making sure they were safe. They were very tired, too, because the sheep often grumbled about being too hot or too cold. The shepherds were all asleep except one, because one of them had to stay awake just in case something happened.

Suddenly something did happen, and the shepherd wondered if it was a dream. He saw a very bright light in the sky, and it came closer, and he was very scared.

Don’t be scared, said a voice from out of the light. Have I got good news for you! There’s a new baby in town and he’s very special. When he grows up, he will teach everyone to be kind.

The shepherd woke the others up. They rubbed their eyes and sat up straight. They could hear people singing: Thank you to God who made the world! He has made a baby, too. The baby, Jesus. He will teach people the way of peace and kindness.

The shepherds jumped out of their pyjamas, slipped on their shorts and ran down the hillside, saying: Let’s go and have a look!

The voice from the shining light said: You’ll find him at the hotel with the animals, wrapped in a rug.

So they rushed down to the hotel, ran around the back, opened the gate, and marched inside. The sheep woke up and frowned, saying: Please be quiet! We’re asleep!

Mary opened her eyes and smiled; Joseph rubbed his eyes in surprise and said, Please, come in!

The baby Jesus woke up and cried.

Can we have a hold? asked one of the shepherds.

Mary looked at him kindly and said: Sure. Be careful you support his head.

The baby stopped crying.

Just then the rooster got excited again and crowed, Cock-a doodle-doo! three times.

Time to get up, said the cow.

Do we really have to wake up? said the sheep.

The donkeys danced together in the corner. I carried the baby Jesus, said Mary’s donkey, and he’s going to teach people to be kind to us and to the earth.

The shepherds said: Time for us to go. Isn’t it great that God has given us a special baby!

Mary smiled and looked kindly at them as they went back out through the gate and up the hill.

Baby Jesus went back to sleep. Mary and Joseph looked at each other and smiled. And soon all three were fast asleep.

PART THREE

Meanwhile in a country a long way away there were some other people looking up into the night sky. They saw a new star, very bright. They knew all about stars, so they said to each other: This is a special star. What does it mean?

They went to their books and spent a long time trying to find out.

I think, said one of them, that it must mean that a special baby has been born who will grow up to be a special leader. We must go to find out.

So they got on their camels, and started the long journey to where the star shone brightest.

Wait a moment, said one of them. We should bring some presents for the baby.

They turned round and looked for very special gifts: gold and nice smelling oils. They quickly wrapped them up and set off again on their long, long journey.

After twelve whole days they came to the big city, Jerusalem, and asked about the baby.

Nobody knew about it and the king, Herod, was angry because he thought that the men should be giving him presents. He wasn’t kind.

There was not far to go, because the star was still brightly shining, so the men set off down the road, until they came to Bethlehem. They stopped at the hotel and ordered only the very best rooms, because they were very important.

When they asked about the baby, the man at the door said: Sorry! No special babies today. There’s only the one round the back in the animal shed that keeps crying.

Round they went, in through the gate, and there they all were: Mary, Joseph, the baby Jesus, and the sheep, the donkeys, the cow, and the rooster.

The sheep looked at the men and bah-ed a growly bah! Must you make such noise! Please be quiet! We’re asleep!

Mary looked up and smiled kindly. The men unwrapped the presents.

Great, said Joseph, I’m sure we’ll be able to use the gold.

Great, said Mary, I was wanting something to wipe on the baby’s bottom so it doesn’t get sore.

The sheep looked at the camels outside and said: I hope you’re not going to bring those awful things in here!

The cow said: Shhh! I think we can find a space for them just over there where there is some grass.

Baby Jesus smiled when he heard the cow’s kind words, as if he understood. He didn’t really understand because he was too little. He was just feeling happy, as people do, when those around them are kind.

And God smiled too, because God made us to be kind and peaceful.

2

The Kindness Star

A Christmas Fantasy

"What do think it was like when Jesus was born?" asked Matthew.

I don’t know, said Levi. Just like with anyone else, I suppose.

But suppose it was something very special, said Matthew.

We’ll never know, said Levi.

Then I will imagine what it was like, said Matthew.

So Matthew turned over in bed, said Good night to his brother and fell fast asleep.

In the middle of the night he had a dream. Was it a dream? He dreamt he saw a star. The star did not stand still. It kept moving about in the sky. What’s the matter? he asked the star. Are you lost?

No, said the star. I’m looking for kindness.

You’re looking for what? asked Matthew.

Kindness, repeated the star. Kindness makes you well and makes others well. I can’t find it, said the star. I looked down on the city of Jerusalem and all I saw was a greedy king, Herod, who just wanted all the power for himself and wanted to kill anyone who could take it away from him.

Really? said Matthew.

Yes, he even killed his wife and some of his children and now he’s wanting to kill all the little boys who might grow up to be kings.

That’s terrible, said Matthew.

Yes, said the star, so terrible I rushed over to the other side of the sky where the sun comes up.

What did you see there? asked Matthew.

I saw three men on camels travelling through the desert.

Is that all? remarked Matthew. What’s so remarkable about that?

Well, said the star, they were carrying presents.

Where are they now? asked Matthew.

They’re on their way across many countries and they are heading west.

So you did find some kindness? said Matthew.

Well, yes, I did, said the star, because as they went into new countries, people welcomed them and helped them find something to eat and gave them shelter when they were cold. They spoke a different language, so people tried to help them find what they needed.

Where are they now? asked Matthew.

That’s the trouble, said the star. They have disappeared. They came as far as Jerusalem and I think Herod must have captured them and he is far from kind. He’ll want to kill them, too.

The star became so sad at this point that it shed some tears and it started to rain. It rained and rained and in his dream Matthew found himself floating down a stream, all the way to a little town called Bethlehem. He just managed to grab hold of a tree on the banks of the river and pull himself out. Then he noticed that there were others in the stream, too, who were in real danger. He reached a hand to them too and dragged them ashore. He was exhausted, as were those whom he rescued, and so he fell fast asleep in his dream.

Sleep, when you dream, does not last long and soon he woke up along with all the others whom he had rescued. There was a loud noise which probably woke them up. It was the noise of three camels trudging down the road and, as he looked up, he saw a star. It was the star that had been speaking with him.

Found it! Found it! cried the star and became so excited that it burned more brightly than ever. Come with me!

So Matthew and his rescued friends rubbed their eyes, stretched their legs, and hobbled along behind the camels. Soon they all arrived to see a family camped on the side of the road. There was a mum and dad and a baby they had put in a feeding box usually used for animals which they found near a paddock.

It was still night, but the star’s light was so bright that Matthew could see everything. The three men on the camels gave presents to the mum and dad and said: This baby is going to be the king of kindness. One day he will help to spread kindness across the whole wide world.

The star seemed to smile as if it knew and grew brighter. Then it shone its light directly on Matthew. Found it! Found it! it cried.

Matthew was sure the star had heard what the three men said.

Found it! Found it! it cried again, this time hovering directly over Matthew. This made Matthew confused. Had the star not understood?

Then in the quietist whisper the star came right down to Matthew’s ear and said. He’s going to be the king of kindness, but I also found the kindness in you when you helped rescue those men who were drowning.

Matthew felt very warm and so happy that he suddenly awoke from his dream. His mum had come in and turned the light on. It was a winter morning and he would need to get up to go to school. Half asleep from his dream, he blurted out: I won’t let him do it! I won’t. I want the king of kindness to live! His mum was puzzled. Herod! No!

When he finally woke up properly, he forgot most of his dream as people do sometimes when they become wide awake, but one thing kept going through his mind: I’ll follow the star. I’ll follow the king of kindness. And one day I may tell people my story and I won’t let Herod and hate ever win.

And he did, but then Herod had some very ugly friends and it is still hard sometimes to be kind when some people don’t want it.

3

The Christmas Queue

It was a long, wide queue stretching up towards the makeshift tent. You couldn’t see the baby—not until you went right in. All you could see were the crowds and the animals: the sheep sitting patiently, safe from danger; the goats pulling impatiently at the few tufts of grass.

Back in the queue the people waited, moving slowly up the hill. Old Mrs Crichton was there, hobbling with her walking stick. I’m too young for a walking frame, she insists. She’s been coming every year. She remembers what he said back then by the well—or, better, what he did: how he met her as a woman; how her race and culture were no barrier; how he offered that real water that quenched her inner thirst.

Zak is there, too, briefcase in hand. He doesn’t climb trees anymore, but he still sees a long way. He sees Gaza. He sees Africa. His generosity goes beyond the horizon. Did you know that $10 there goes as far as $100, sometimes $1000, here? he asks. Zak has a heart for all humanity. He is good news for the poor in person since real salvation came to his house.

His friend still refuses to join him. He’s still wanting eternal life and he’s still sad. He’s still good but does not do much good. He now owns the land here and the makeshift tent—rented for the occasion. Next year he is planning an entry fee. He has filled his emptiness with great wealth. His tree has its roots stretching to every continent, impoverishing every soil. And all the time he keeps meeting Zak, who keeps planting new trees and developing new resources and sharing new wealth.

And she is there—the one they wanted to stone. And the one with the massage oil. They stick together because they know they are embarrassing. They know he will welcome them, but they know that many who claim him as their hero will not. So, they try to be unobtrusive and walk with the people who are different in their ways, their culture, their gender, their origins.

Pilate is not in the queue. He’s doing a TV interview, explaining about collateral damage and the importance of security—and, yes, acknowledging that sometimes innocent people get killed, but that he is part of a system that brought peace and stability to the Middle East—and not many succeed in that. A baby is, after all, only a baby.

Peter looks very awkward. He’s all dressed up, carrying a shepherd’s staff made of gold, but looking like a medieval painting come to life. Underneath he’s itching to go fishing again. But he wants to be here. The crows of the roosters set him going and he remembers the eyes that spoke truth—and reconciliation. On stage he wants the company to perform and celebrate life and hope.

Children are there, with their parents, but also running in circles, playing and chatting to one another as the long queue inches forward. Most no longer remember the time he welcomed them into his arms and refused to believe that children were unimportant and didn’t matter. Some have known joy, some, pain and abuse. There will be a place for them in the tent—always.

John the Baptist is there, complaining, carrying a quiver full of warning signs: Stop hating Jews in Jesus’ name! Stop turning the good news into a promise of more luxury for the rich! Stop imagining ecstasy is love! Stop perverting the gospel into selfish consumerism and a promise of real estate in another world! Stop living richly at the expense of others! Stop pretending you can waste the world’s resources and not destroy it! Stop your wars, your greed, your racism, your sexism, your making yourself great by making others small!

A little girl leads me by the hand as I approach the fold of the tent. You have to be quiet, she said, and close your eyes. I closed my eyes and saw before me a great mountain. And there . . . were people gathered from every nation and every people. Near the summit on a wide plateau I saw a wide table. Everyone had a place. Everyone could see. And there at one moment was a baby, at another an adult hand stretched out, offering bread and wine. And I heard a voice saying: And you, do you want the love that changes the world? Without saying a word, I reached out my hand in response, took the bread, received the wine—and I knew. I knew that here was light and life and hope for me and for our world.

The little girl led me further and whispered: Open your eyes. When I looked, the crowds had gone. I was standing in a garden. This is your garden, she said. Make the flowers grow! Let the trees grow tall! Attend to the weeds. Make sure there are paths and places to sit and be still. Be sure the birds will come and make their nests here in the branches. And this will be a holy place for all.

I have made the journey and will make it again. The baby cries in the cries of all people. The makeshift tent invites me to care. And I know there can be hope and peace. And I will learn to love and care for the garden and all its people.

4

Christmas Imagination

Santa journeying across the sky from his North Pole resort is not the first flight of imagination forming part of our Christmas story. Already the first stories in Matthew and Luke give rein to fantasy and promise. Matthew employs their understanding of human reproduction to repeat a story that Mary was the rich soil in which the divine seed was sown, creates a pastiche of allusions