The Lady Who Liked Clean Restrooms

By J. P. Donleavy

Jocelyn Guenevere Marchantiere Jones, sometime resident of Scarsdale, educated at Bryn Mawr, has been brought up always to behave like a lady. But what with chiselling divorce lawyers, fraudulent financial advisors and importunate and oversezed suitors, the patience of even the most impeccable lady might wear thin. Which is why Joy ends up with a pair of matching Purdey shotguns across her knees and a .38 Smith & Wesson under her pillow, waiting for the next lying bastard to cross her threshold. Trigger-happy she may be, and no longer quite welcome in polite society, but Joy Jones, one of J.P. Donleavy's most inspired comic creations, will always follow her South Carolina granny's advice on the matter of clean rest rooms, a preference which has some rather surprising consequences.

• Language: English
• Publisher: The Lilliput Press
• Release date: Jan 1, 1997
• ISBN: 9781843513346

J. P. Donleavy

J.P. ‘Mike’ Donleavy has written more than twenty books since The Ginger Man, including The Beastly Beatitudes of Balthazar B, Meet My Maker the Mad Molecule, A Fairy Tale of New York, The Onion Eaters and Schultz (all available as eBooks from Lilliput), along with several works of non-fiction such as The Unexpurgated Code: A Complete Manual of Survival and Manners. He lives along the shores of Lough Owel near Mullingar in County Westmeath.

Reviews for The Lady Who Liked Clean Restrooms

[drled_1 · Rating: 2 out of 5 stars]

Synopsis: Jocelyn was raised to be a lady, so when her husband wanted a younger, prettier woman, she did not seek revenge, only a divorce. Without alimony, she quickly found out that she couldn't stay in her mansion in Scarsdale, New York. The money she makes from selling her house quickly evaporates when she entrusts it to an investment broker. She now finds herself with dwindling resources and no skills; she cannot get and keep a job. The bright spot in her life is going to art museums. Since her grandmother raised her to be a lady, she hunts for clean restrooms to use when she's away from home. One of her favorites is in an upscale funeral home. Unfortunately, she's used it often enough that she's afraid that the director has caught on and will tell her she is no longer welcome in this facility; to camouflage herself, she signs one of the remembrance books and goes in to sit with the corpse. She is alone in the room with the body for some time before she can sneak out and use the restroom. A few days later she is called to a lawyer's office, and although she is afraid she is going to be sued or arrested for some unknown crime, she is the sole beneficiary of the man who's book she signed. Completely befuddled with her good fortune, she goes home and contemplates suicide.Review: The only reason the entire book wasn't one run-on sentence was because there were actually periods between words. The writing was annoying, and the character lost my empathy fairly quickly. Blah.

[edwinbcn · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

The title of this novella by J. P. Donleavy, The lady who liked clean restrooms. The chronicle of one of the strangest stories ever to be rumoured about around New York gives an excellent indication of what to expect from this humourous, short work of fiction. Main character in the novel is a middle-aged woman, and if there is anything about a person in their name, then it must be in hers, as her full name is Jocelyn Guenevere Marchantiere Jones. As her character, it combines the high snobbishness with the ordinary.Explaining more about the story might give it away. The lady who liked clean restrooms is a hilariously funny novella.

[sallyapollon · Rating: 3 out of 5 stars]

Quirky, I love Donleavy's use of the English language, nice little tale. Sympathetic treatment of one who really deserves very little sympathy.

[codaa27_1 · Rating: 2 out of 5 stars]

For being a short book there was a pretty involved conversation amongst my book club meetup regarding the virtues of the easily dislikable character, her actions, the plot line, and the author. There was some consensus within the group of how serious a novella this was with the story capable of being seen in a serial, trite perspective in spite of the surface level meaning. Although it is definitely a quick read it is also a contentious one due to the narrative and implied meaning when trying to pin down the overall merits among a group of people larger than yourself. Short story long, it isn't a classic but it can make you think.

[ganeshaka · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

Look at me! I'm out on a limb, bouncing!This is the most entertaining book (novella, actually) that I've read this year. Go to Amazon. Do NOT read the plot summaries (which contain spoilers). Order a used copy. And for four dollars you've obtained two hours of hilarious joy.And hello Hollywood! If ever there was a story fit for a timely movie, this is IT. Depression 2.0? Anyone who is, or fears, losing a home, a job, a spouse or friends "gets" this "fairy tale" immediatelyJocelyn Guenevere Marchantiere Jones is a Scarsdale housewife, Bryn Mawr grad, with an empty nest. Two snobbish kids in college. One day her husband comes home and drops the bomb. She gets the house, and a nice chunk of change. He gets an apartment in the city, and a clean conscience about his twenty something girlfiend. And thus, her wing on fire, Mrs. Jones goes into a slow spiraling descent.But don't ask for anymore details! Hey, it's only a two hour read.Donleavy's prose is raunchy, and staggers forward like a drunk in search of a lamppost. In fact, I had to read the opening paragraph three times because of the odd sentence structure. But soon I was running through the prose like a high hurdler. And fell sprawling, head over heels, at the trip wire near the end.You know what? I'm out on a limb, bouncing! Goodness, gracious, Great Gatsby Almighty. Read this book!!