Inclined to Love

By Sara House

Eliza was thrown into an unexpected life where she has to reaEUR"discover herself and her faith in the midst of the tragedies she has experienced. With the loss of her family, she has to cope with a new family. She discovers a true love and the loss of it. She has to rely on her faith and the faith her new family has in her to understand the true peace, love, and understanding God has to give her. Take the journey with Eliza as she rediscovers herself and the love that surpasses all others.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Page Publishing, Inc.
• Release date: Nov 3, 2022
• ISBN: 9781642983920

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Inclined to Love

Sara House

Copyright © 2018 Sara House

All rights reserved

First Edition

Page Publishing, Inc

New York, NY

First originally published by Page Publishing, Inc 2018

ISBN 978-1-64298-391-3 (Paperback)

ISBN 978-1-64298-392-0 (Digital)

Printed in the United States of America

Table of Contents

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Chapter 10

Chapter 11

Chapter 12

Chapter 13

Chapter 14

Chapter 15

Chapter 16

Chapter 17

Chapter 18

Chapter 19

Chapter 20

Chapter 21

To every special student I have ever worked with

and will continue to work with.

Also to my family for their love and support.

Preface

My entire life was changed in just moments when my parents and my sister were taken form me. I was so mad at God for taking them a way. I was ready to take my own life just to be with them. I found myself fighting between what I was taught about how God is a loving God, but why would He take my family away if He was so loving? I was yelling at Him all the time and fighting to figure out what I knew deep down inside of me and with what I was feeling. I knew I needed help to figure it out. Then God opened my heart.

I never thought I could find a love that was never ending. I had my heart broken, but there was one person that I knew would be there for me every time I needed help. God is that person that is always there to bring you in under His wing and comfort you when you need him. He loves you unconditionally. Just remember that all things are possible through Christ who strengthens us.

Chapter 1

A New Life

When I was about sixteen years old, I found myself living in a foster home in Newberg, a small town just south west of Portland, Oregon. I had been labeled severely depressed and suffering from post-traumatic stress disorder due to the fact that I somehow managed to survive a horrific car accident where both my parents and my only sibling (my older sister, Jessica) died.

The foster family that I was living with had two other foster kids living with them. Their names were Jennie, who was an Asian girl quiet most of the time and the same age as I was, just a month younger than me; and Lawrence, or Lu as we called him, a boy who was so tall no one knew he was only sixteen like me.

There were three other kids in the house that belonged to the foster parents and they were Kamron, blond and beautiful, whom I call Kammy, eighteen almost nineteen and someone I generally seemed to take quite a liking to because of her overwhelming ability to show compassion to someone who was hurting such as myself; Josephine, who was only five, the baby and the cutest little thing you ever saw. She had dark hair with bouncing curls and the brightest blue eyes I had ever seen. Then finally, Joel, blond, who knew he was good looking, he was also my age, and he had his father’s dark eyes. Joel seemed somewhat self-absorbed, but later, I found out it was a cover because he wasn’t too sure of himself.

Joelwas a very intelligent young man and seemed to have his whole life mapped out for him by his parents as well as his older sister Kammy. As for the two other foster kids, I had no idea where they were headed. Little Josephine, however, was the little angel that everyone just loved; she was just so full of happiness and love for everyone in the house (I think she got that from her older sister).

Now as for my foster parents, Ralph had dark hair and deep brown eyes. Lucinda was blond with bright blue eyes (she was otherwise called Lucy). They were very caring and loving people, but they seemed to go overboard a lot when it came to giving you your space in the moments where it was most needed. They just wouldn’t leave me alone. I think they must have been worried that I might try to kill myself or something like that. I seemed to have them both on either side of me whenever I was at home. I couldn’t even seem to go to the bathroom or sleep without one of them checking on me every five minutes.

When Ralph and Lucy finally decided that it would be okay for me to start at the local high school (Newberg High) they of course both had to come my first day and sit in all my classes with me to make sure that I would be okay and not feel like the new kid in town. (Oh yeah, having them there with me would never make me feel that way at all. Right). The only thing I noticed was the other kids staring. I just tried to pay attention to my what classes were and who my teachers were. I never seemed to get over that unbelievably embarrassing day. It seemed to leave a very big impression on the other students at the high school as well because it seemed to come up every so often in conversations when someone wanted something funny to talk about.

That same night I went home, went up to my room with a sigh of relief, and reset my alarm to go off at 5:45 a.m., so I would be up the next morning with plenty of time before any one else in the house. I desperately wanted to be out of the house before Ralph and Lucy were done with their breakfast I couldn’t even begin to think of them coming with me and giving me another embarrassing day.

I got up the next morning and quickly got myself ready. I headed down stairs as quietly as possible; I ate my breakfast, then made pancakes and eggs for every one else so they could see I was feeling fine and ready for a day of school by myself. After everyone was sitting at the table, I stood up slowly to excuse myself. I hear Lucy clear her throat.

Now wait a minute there, Lizzy. Where do you think you’re off to this morning? I heard Lucy’s concerned voice say. I was in the middle of standing up when she said this, so I froze, tensing straight up, swallowing hard, and looked up at her gritting my teeth.

I-I’m going to school? I said stunned by her rather blunt question directed at me. Biting my lip, I finished, I I wanted to get to sc-school early to do the homework I didn’t get finished last night. Is it all right with you if I do that? I continued in a small humbled voice. I held my breath waiting for her answer.

Will you be all right without Ralph and I today? Lucy asked in a concerned voice. I heard Kammy huff. I turned to look at her. She winked at me, smiling an apologetic smile.

I should be fine today. Thanks again, Lucy, Ralph, for helping me yesterday, I answered in a weary voice attempting to sound thankful. I just wanted to escape and get this day over with.

All right then, Lizzy, if you think you can manage it, we’ll let you go, but if you need anything, all you have to do is have the school call us and we will be there ASAP, okeydokey? she replied in a voice meant for a very young child. Kammy slapped the table.

Mom! Kammy retorted. She’s not three you know. She’s in high school and she needs her space. Let her be for once! Lucy picked up her napkin and wiped her mouth. She blinked hard. I knew I liked Kammy.

Okay, Okay! For goodness sake, I know I can be a little overprotective sometimes. Lucy sighed. So give me some slack on this as well, please, Lucy said in a defensive voice, taking a deep breath. I saw Kammy roll her eyes. Then Ralph cleared his throat. Kammy just looked at him, with a stay-out-of-it look standing, putting her hands on the table, and leaning closer to her mother.

Mom, you know you are and have always been over the top, when it comes to overprotective. Just let her have the space she needs and get over the trauma you put her through yesterday! Kammy replied in the same strong voice insisting her mother leave me alone for once. You have been so protective of all the kids that come through this house. This poor girl needs some time to breathe and get her life back!

I decided to slip out silently as the two older women at the table were having their discussion and get out while I could. I ever so quietly walked around the corner to the front door and inched the door open cautiously, trying not to make a noise to alert any one of my disappearance. As I stepped out onto the porch, it just as quietly as I had opened it. I looked out on the street and saw my mother’s car.

I felt tears prick my eyes as I was once again reminded what had happened to my family. I also knew that I would never see them again. My mom’s car that my father had gotten for her for her birthday, a month before the accident. You know something safe and fuel-efficient. The kind my father had decided to get himself was a new sports car with a portion of their lottery winnings, and it was his car we were in when we ended up being smashed into the meridian on highway 26 by a semi-truck on our way home from Portland.

I pulled the keys out of my new backpack fingering them, I wiped my eyes and pressed the unlock button on the fob. Beep, beep! the car sounded. Oh man! I sighed as my head fell. My cover was blown. Within ten seconds Kammy, Joel, Lawrence, and Jennie were flying out the door and all four were calling, Shot gun! I slowly fell into my seat. I checked to make sure everyone was in the car and closed my door. I took a deep breath and pulled my seatbelt over my left shoulder and buckled it. Is everyone buckled in? I asked in a low sigh.

Oh yah, let’s go! Lawrence said with gusto, almost flying into the front seat with Kammy and me.

I hope you won’t drive too fast. I hate going fast, Jennie said in a whiney voice, complaining about my driving when I hadn’t even started the car. I placed my left hand on the wheel and turned to look at Kammy.

Don’t pay any attention to them. Let’s just get to school, ’k? Kammy said sweetly as she put her hand on my shoulder in a reassuring manner.

So are we gonna go or what? Joel snarled from the backseat.

Okay! Okay? Every one calm down. We’re going already! I retorted back to them. I started the car, put it into drive, and pulled slowly away from the curb.

We got to school in plenty of time for me to finish the work I needed to do for my English class since I was three months behind and needed to get all caught up so I could pass and not have to do credit recovery next year. I seemed to have the most trouble with taking the words I have read and putting them into my own words for language arts class.

I guess it could be because my mom always helped me with the technical processes of that part. She always knew just the right questions to ask so I could get it done right. I had set to work right away and had gotten my pre-calculus done, my advanced bio questions too, so I was ready for the labs I needed to make up for the last three months today.

As I went through my day, I found that my schedule seemed to be somewhat small compared to my other school. I guess because I opted to fill my freshmen and sophomore year with academics and no electives so I would have an easier load my junior and senior year. I was hoping to get a job this year and buy a car, but I guess I wouldn’t need to get a job for a while now, would I?

My day seemed to be dragging on until third period. In my Spanish class, I walked in and saw him, Elisha Brockman (Eli), the most beautiful, (there is no other word for how stunning he truly was. This boy had reddish blonde hair styled short, kinda messy, and he had the deepest green eyes that made you feel like you could just fall into them if you weren’t carful. Eli was sitting at a desk in the middle of the classroom. I looked around for an empty desk and it just so happened that the only open seat in the class was right behind him.

I walked slowly across the room, taking in my breath as I passed him, and set my bag on the floor behind him, trying not to stare. I felt his eyes on me. He was staring right back at me with those incredible eyes as if he could see right through me. I sat down, letting my breath out slowly, all the while, for some reason, feeling like I was under some kind of microscope. It felt like he was still watching me. I assumed because I didn’t have someone else with me today.

I heard the teacher clear her throat and so I looked up at her, feeling my face turning red. She smiled at me and I felt relieved she wasn’t looking at me but at Eli.

I had been taking Spanish since I was ten and this was the highest Spanish class that was offered at this school. I was hoping to be challenged this year. I was until she started to speak. I wasn’t impressed at all; she was a short dark-haired woman who didn’t seem to have any ability to relate to any of the students in the class.

Class seemed to take forever. I tried to pay attention but I started to fall asleep because I already knew what the lesson was about. My head shot up when I heard a deep, soft voice speaking to me. It’s time for lunch. Are you coming? I sucked in a fast stunned breath and I stood up in a daze and looked at the person that spoke to me.

What? I replied in a sleepy, yawning voice.

The bell rang and it’s lunch time, unless you wanted to sleep some more. It was Eli; he was speaking slowly as if he was talking in slow motion. Here, let me help you find the cafeteria and you can meet my friends, he said, picking up my Spanish book and handing it to me.

So I hear you’re from the Portland area. What school did you go to before you moved here? Eli continued probing me as we walked down the hall to the cafeteria.

It wasn’t Portland, I spoke in an annoyed voice. It was Hillsboro and I went to HILHI, I continued in a low voice, feeling bad for the way I reacted to his one hundred questions as we turned the corner into the cafeteria. I closed my eyes hoping he would stop probing me.

Oh, so you were a Spartan? Eli sarcastically replied back at me.

Okay, yah? Whatever! I replied back feeling irritated again. We approached a table with six occupants sitting there staring at me in bewilderment, wondering, Who’s this?

The first to speak of the group was a tall, lanky boy with red hair, bright blue eyes, and seemed loud and obnoxious. Joseph but Joey was what they called him.

So who’s this you have brought to our lovely lunch table? Joey said as he stood up and took my hand gently in his, smiling. I took in a quick breath of embarrassment. Hi there, my name is Joey and I’ll be the designated entertainer here for your enjoyment this lunch hour—well, forty-five minutes, and you are? He let out a low chuckle. I looked up over at Eli and he was smiling at Joey.

I’m Eliza, uh, but you all can call me Lizzy, I said softly as I pulled my hand back quickly from Joey before he kissed it. He sat down looking disappointed that he didn’t get to kiss my hand.

Don’t worry, Joey, a girl said, consoling him. She’s just not used to you yet. I looked in the direction of the girl’s voice. Hi, my name is Mia. You’ll get used to Joey soon. She smiled at him. He just likes to act gentlemanly, you know, like those guys in the olden days. Mia was a beautiful girl with long, straight medium brown hair. She had deep, dark brown eyes and seemed very friendly and outgoing.

Another boy stood up and introduced himself. Hello there, my name is Augustine but everyone calls me Alli. He held out his hand to shake mine. It’s nice to meet you, Eliza, or can I call you Lizzy as well? Alli seemed very polite and quiet.

Sorry, these are my friends: Jackson. Eli pointed across the table.

Hey there. He waved as he kept looking at his book. Every one calls me Jack. Jack was blonde, with deep blue eyes, a bit shorter than the other boys at the table, and a little on the chubby side. He seemed sweet enough though. I stood there, looking at each person as Eli introduced them to me, with wonder at how many friends he had.

And this is Abigail. We all call her Abbie. I do believe that you have met everyone else, Eli said, gesturing to a chair smiling, as he pulled it out away from the table for me. Abbie was another one of those beauties; she had dark auburn hair with tight curls down to her shoulders, bright blue eyes, and light porcelain skin.

I sat there looking around at them all and begun to wonder why these girls would be sitting with these very interesting boys. As I pulled out my lunch from my bag to eat, I was bombarded with questions and feeling something like a convict being interrogated by a bunch of cops. After lunch, I quickly walked off to biology. I shook my head knowing Eli was right behind me, continuing to grill me with his questions.

So what kind of classes did you take at Hilhi? What were your teachers like? So I hear they have an outdoor campus, he just continued on the entire five minutes without seeming to take a breath, the entire way to my class. Okay, here we are.

I sighed in relief. Then I heard him say, I’ll come by after class and walk with you to language arts class. I gave him a strange look. It seems that it’s another class we happen to have together. I was beginning to get annoyed with all the questions.

Don’t get me wrong. It wasn’t that I didn’t like the attention I was getting from this rather amazing-looking boy. I was just getting tired of the ten million questions he was asking me.

I got all my labs done quickly and I still had time to get started on my next assignment that was given out today. It helped having already done those labs at Hilhi. The class seemed to be dragging on probably because I kept looking at the clock, wondering when the class was getting over.

At my old school, we had seventy-minute classes, and here at Newberg High, there were ninety-minute classes, Oh man, when is this class going to end? I mumbled under my breath to myself looking at the clock. A few minutes later the bell rang, and as soon as it did, I was out the door and there he was waiting for me.

Quick, huh? Eli said. You see, my class is just next door. He smiled a smile that hit me deep in my soul. Well, shall we? he continued, gesturing with his right hand the way to our language arts class. Once again, he started up with the questions. My stomach fluttered at the sound of his voice.

So how was biology class? Did you like the teacher? Did you get your labs done? Eli continued to yammer on as we walked down the hall to class.

Whoa, okay? Hold on there, man. I took in a deep breath. I can’t think with all these questions you keep bombarding me with, I sprang at him in a rather disturbed voice. I felt bad the moment I saw his face.

Sorr-ry, Eli retorted back in a rather upset voice. He raked his hand over the top of his head. I saw the hurt in his eyes then, as he turned and started to walk away he dropped his head.

Why did I do that? I hurt him and he might not come back, I thought to myself, so I reached out and grabbed his arm and pulled him back. He turned slowly with his head still down. I let go quickly and looked at his sad face.

Hey, Eli, I didn’t mean to upset you, I said apologetically. But it’s just so confusing when you keep asking question after question. You’re not even waiting for me to answer the first one you asked. He lifted his head slowly and looked right at me with those incredible eyes of his, sadly.

I’m sorry too, he replied in a soft and very humbled voice. I shouldn’t have been so domineering. With all my questioning, I compared to others, I don’t seem to have a lot of friends. He took a deep breath and I sighed.

What! You? You have more friends than I could even dream of having. I’ve never been able to hold onto more than two friends at one time, I sputtered in an almost pleading voice. He just looked into my eyes with concern, wondering where all my emotion was coming from as my eyes began to fill with tears. I looked down and wiped them away.

I heard him clear his throat as though he was going to say something. Sorry, I said softly, I’m just having a hard time adjusting to a new school and my new life. I spoke softly as we walked in to our language arts class. He just looked at me with wonder in his eyes. I followed him over to where he showed me a seat behind him and we sat down.

I began to realize something had happened in that moment, when we looked into each other’s eyes, but I wasn’t quite sure what it was. I knew I wasn’t quite ready for another close relationship with a boy yet. I did feel something that I had never felt before when I was close to Eli though.

Chapter 2

Crazy Days

The weekend was something I wasn’t expecting. I was given a list of chores that I needed to help Kammy with. As soon as they were done, the rest of the Saturday was all mine to do and go anywhere I wanted to with in reason.

I put it into perspective of what my particular situation looks like. My parent had the money put in a trust for me and my sister. We would each receive specific percentage per month ; But now it was just me. The large amount of money that my parents had won made it so that the trust was now just mine and would be paying for my foster care. The money that I would be getting for myself personally to use would also come out of what was given to the people that would be taking care of me.

The amount given to the family I was staying with was $2,800 a month, and I would be getting $200 a week to pay for my gas and to start a checking account to begin the budgeting for the regular but quite different lifestyle that I ended up with. When I got the first $200, I went and got some new clothes and shoes. I also got some gifts for my new family to thank them for helping me through my very emotional time.

There weren’t too many places to go shopping except Fred Meyers on the northeast part of town, unless I wanted to drive into Sherwood just east of Newberg down 99W, where there were more stores for all kinds of shopping.

The $200 didn’t go far, but I was able to get a few things. As I pulled out onto 99W going back to my new home, I realized that it was my sister’s birthday and every emotion inside of me was overwhelming and coming to the surface. My head swelled with all the memories of my sister Jessica.

My head ached and I just started sobbing. I had to pull over before I got in an accident. I sat there for a while, taking in deep, calming breaths, before I realized there was another car that had pulled up behind me. I heard a soft knock on my window. Shocked, I looked up, sucked in a quick breath to see Eli standing there with a look of true concern on his face. I turned the key in the ignition so I could put the window down.

Hey there, are you okay? he said in a truly mournful voice, his eyes shinning down on me. You look like you could use a friend, you know someone to talk to? he continued as he reached in and wiped the tears from one of my cheeks. My heart jumped into my throat when he touched me.

Thanks for stopping. I swallowed the tears back hard. I better get goin’ home, I replied in a voice still filled with sorrow, trying to keep my voice steady.

Hey wait, why don’t I follow you home and then we can walk down to the Coffee Cottage so you can get out whatever is making you feel so sad, Eli ever so sweetly asked as he bent down closer with his arm on my door leaning down.

Okay, I guess? I said as I looked up and saw just how close he had gotten to me, my heart fluttered. I’ll see you there, I replied as I put up the window quickly and started the car again. I flipped on my blinkers and pulled out onto the highway to go home. All the way my heart seemed to nearly be pounding in my throat.

Eli’s old yellow V.W. bug that had orange flames painted on the hood, rumbling, pulled up right