Three Plays: Baby / Runs in the Family / Land's End

By D. L. Forbes

These Three Plays by D. L. Forbes, have been likened in feel to the works of Pinter, Orton, and Becket, yet the author has a decided flavor and voice of his own. Delightfully interwoven raw and often humorous, drama at its best.

• Language: English
• Publisher: BookBaby
• Release date: Dec 1, 2022
• ISBN: 9781667870113

Book preview

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These three plays are sold subject to the condition that they shall not, by way of trade or otherwise, be performed, lent, resold, hired out or otherwise circulated without the author’s prior consent in any form of binding, cover, or device other than that in which it is published and without a similar condition including this condition being imposed on the subsequent purchaser.

All rights reserved

© D. L. Forbes 2022

ISBN 978-1-66787-010-6

ISBN 978-1-66787-011-3

CAUTION: All rights whatsoever in these three works are strictly reserved. Applications for permission for any use whatsoever including performance rights must be made in advance, prior to any such proposed use, to [e-mail]

Books by D. L. Forbes

SAXONFORD

VOLUME ONE

WINTER INTO SUMMER

Fiction

SAXONFORD

VOLUME TWO

SUMMER INTO WINTER

Fiction

CHILDREN OF SYCORAX

Fiction/Biography

LIFE THREATENING POETRY ACROSS AMERICA

ONE HUNDRED ONE DOLLAR POEMS

The One Hundred Poetry Series – Number One

UMLUNGU

THE WHITE SCUM THAT FLOATS IN THE SURF

ONE HUNDRED EVERYDAY POEMS

The One Hundred Poetry Series – Number Two

YID UN GOY YINGL

Fiction/Biography

GENTILE AND JEW BOYS

ONE HUNDRED POEMS FOR SHEM

The One Hundred Poetry Series – Number Three

ROUGH FLUFF

ONE HUNDRED LOVE POEMS

The One Hundred Poetry Series – Number Four

CHARMED, I’M SURE

ONE HUNDRED SEXUAL POEMS

The One Hundred Poetry Series – Number Five

WITTGENSTEIN’S SON

&

U. G. KRISHNAMURTI

DUCKS OR RABBITS

Autobiography/Biography

CAT GOT MY BRAIN

ONE HUNDRED MAD POEMS

The One Hundred Poetry Series – Number Six

THREE PLAYS

I. BABY

II. RUNS IN THE FAMILY

III. LAND’S END

Contents

Baby

Runs in the Family

Land’s End

D. L. FORBES

---

Baby

CHARACTERS

DELL - A handsome and muscular man, in his late-thirties – Joan’s husband

JOAN - An attractive woman in her mid-thirties – Dell’s wife

MONA - An attractive single mother, in her early-twenties – lives in a bedsit upstairs from Joan and Dell

JACK - A tall handsome and well-built man in his late twenties – Joan’s brother – lives in a bedsit upstairs next door to Mona

INCUBUS - A slight and agile ageless spirit who descends upon sleeping persons and others

OCCULTIST - A tall, dark, and handsome professional looking man in his early forties

The six actors in the play need to be physically fit and attractive.

The roles of Mona and Incubus are particularly physically demanding.

The role of Mona requires a person possibly knowledgeable in stunt work and able to portray convincingly repeated physical abuse.

The role of Incubus requires a person possibly small in stature able to work with air wire and harness. Also with dance, gymnastic and/or acrobatic skills.

Scene: London. Late November, sometime in the late 1970’s. DELL and JOAN’s basement flat – in a partly-converted former kitchen and scullery of a large early 19th-century house. The large gloomy room is both sitting room, bedroom and kitchen. A bathroom and toilet of mainly frosted glass walls is to the right. A sturdy wooden table and two chairs centre left. A large bed upper left. A couch centre right. A door centre right leads to bathroom and toilet. A door upper right leads to outside and the area steps up to railings and the street. The steps and a part of the pavement are seen beyond the three large kitchen windows, centre left. A door lower left (leads out to unseen stairs up to a front hall, and stairs up to MONA and JACK’s bedsits and front door at street level.)

Act One

Scene I

Afternoon. The telephone is ringing.

JOAN is sitting on the couch wearing a bra and briefs. She is reading a magazine. She ignores the ringing telephone.

Silence.

MONA knocks and enters from the U L hall door. MONA is agitated. She is wearing a pink coat and shoes.

JOAN. Oh, hello again Mona. So, what’s up now?

MONA. Where’s my baby, Joan? You said you’d take care of my baby while I was out.

JOAN Yes, I know I did, but, I forgot, all right?

MONA. It’s not down here anywhere, is it?

JOAN looks to the right and left, looks behind her.

JOAN. No Mona, I can’t say it is down here. Can you see it down here?

MONA. But you said, you said you would look in on it; it was on my bed and now it’s not there, or down here, or anywhere else.

JOAN shrugs and continues reading her magazine.

MONA. But Joan, you said you’d take care of my baby. Where’s my baby?

JOAN. I told you, I don’t know, Mona. Is it hiding somewhere maybe? Did you look under your bed or in the wardrobe? You know how kids can act up when left to their own devises.

MONA. It’s only just three months old, Joan.

JOAN. But did you even try looking for it under the bed or in the wardrobe?

MONA. Yes, I did, I looked everywhere. It was laying there right on the middle of my bed a few hours ago when I left, when you said you’d go up and see to it.

JOAN. Well, I just forgot, didn’t I. Is it in Jack’s room maybe? Did you leave it on Jack’s bed by mistake maybe?

MONA. No, it was on my bed. I asked him just now, and he said he hasn’t seen it anywhere neither.

JOAN. Well then, if Jack hasn’t seen it neither, I don’t know what to tell you, Mona.

MONA. But you said . . .

JOAN. Oh, don’t go on about it, Mona, for Christ’s sake. You do go on. Anyway, how the hell am I supposed to be held responsible, for your miserable misplaced baby? Do try and use a bit of common sense sometimes, girl.

JOAN looks back down at her magazine.

DELL comes running down the area steps and enters through the kitchen door UR. DELL is wearing tight shorts and running shoe, his bare chest glistens with sweat, he is breathing hard and is agitated. He continues running on the spot and shadow boxing.

MONA. Dell, have you seen my baby anywhere? Joan, said she’d take care of my baby. She said . . .

DELL. What?

MONA. My baby, Joan said she’d take care of my baby while I was out.

DELL. So?

MONA. So, she was supposed to take care of it.

DELL. I don’t see no baby.

MONA. No, Joan said she’d take care of it but . . .

DELL. Oh, will you just shut up with the whining Mona, for gawd sake! You’re always whining, going on about something or other. You’re hysterical.

MONA. But she said, she said she’d take care of it, and she didn’t. Now it’s gone and I don’t know what . . .

DELL. I said, shut up!

DELL jogs and shadow boxes towards MONA.

MONA. She said though, Dell. She said she’d look after my baby and now . . .

DELL. Shut up!

MONA. It’s not fair, it’s not.

DELL. For the love of shit, shut up! Three times now I’ve told you to shut up! Will you just shut up!

MONA. She said . . .

DELL suddenly punches MONA in the face. MONA falls heavily to the floor stunned.

DELL to JOAN. Didn’t I tell her . . . Didn’t I tell her more than once; three times I told her to shut up!

JOAN looks up indifferently from her magazine.

JOAN. I think actually it was more than three times you told her; it was more like four times.

DELL. There then, see. Four times. What’s the matter with you bloody women anyway, you never shut the hell up! Those Easterners, now they got the right idea; keep the bloody women under wraps until they’re needed. Always blabbing on about some shit or other. You all of you, you get on my bloody tits you do.

DELL, still jogging, and JOAN, they watch MONA crawl across the room to U R.

MONA staggers to her feet and leaves via the kitchen door, walking slowly up the area steps holding her face.

DELL panting, sits at the table.

DELL. You know what, I’m right on the edge right now. Right on the very fucking edge.

JOAN. Right on the edge, are you? Right on the very edge of what though? Right on the edge of that chair perhaps? Maybe you better be careful you don’t fall off and land on your arse.

JOAN giggles.

DELL. Don’t start with me, I’m warning you. I’m dangerously close to the edge right now, murderously close to the edge, I am. Right now, right at this moment, I can assure you. I’m pumped up for it I am. My blood, my testosterone it’s surging through me right now. I’m a fucking danger to myself and others, particularly to others, to those in the vicinity, if not the whole community.

JOAN. Well don’t take it out on me. It’s not my fault you got yourself all hot and up on the edge, is it. Gawd, go and have a cold shower or something.

DELL. I didn’t say I was up on the edge, did I. Why don’t you bloody listen for a change. I said, I am right close to the edge. And I know it’s not your fault; I never said it was your fault, did I. All I’m saying is, I’m close to the fucking edge. Right on the very bloody cutting edge of the edge. This fucking close.

DELL holds up his closed thumb and forefinger.

JOAN. Yeah, well you know what your problem is, don’t you, Dell? Your real basic problem, as a man, I mean. You’re, still a bit immature, a bit immature for your age group like. You haven’t yet grown up into maturity.

DELL. What? And what the fuck do you know about my age group? You know fuck-all about my age group, so shut up your fucking ugly mouth.

JOAN. No, really, you are, you don’t act like a mature man . . . you act very immature for your age. Your darling mother told me that once. Even as a little kid she said, you were immature. Lived way below your age line like.

DELL. What the hell are you even talking about? You’ve never met my mother. You know nothing about my mother. I’ve never even met my mother, for Christ’s sake. Have you finally gone off your fucking chump, or what?

JOAN. It was in a dream, a dream I had. I think it was your darling mother anyway. Anyway, it was someone’s mother who told me that about you. I forget most of it now. It was quite real, quite lucid, at the time, I thought.

JOAN stands up. Pulls on a long fur coat over her underwear.

JOAN. You know how dreams are, fixed solid one minute and then gone the next. Funny that. A lot of rubbish most of them anyway, but sometimes they can be quite illuminating like, like the one with your darling mother.

DELL. Where you going?

JOAN. Out. I’m going out. I think I’ll give Mona a hand looking for her baby, just for a while.

DELL. Why bother doing that? You’re not going to find it, are you?

JOAN. I know I won’t find it, but I feel a bit guilty about her wandering about on her own out there in the cold, what with getting her face punched and looking for her misbegotten baby. She’ll have a nasty black eye there tomorrow from that punch you gave her.

DELL. Women! What a bloody waste of space the lot of you. I don’t know why I bother.

JOAN. No, I don’t know why you bother either. Well, yes, I do know actually, don’t I? I’ll be back in a while. I won’t be gone long.

JOAN exits through the kitchen door and up the area steps.

DELL goes and sits on the couch picks up the magazine. He looks up.

DELL. Met my darling mother . . . that stupid tart.

JACK knocks on the hall door and enters. JACK is wearing black sweat pants and a black singlet. He carries two dumbbell and is working out.

JACK. Oh, hello Dell, is my sister in?

DELL looks to the right and left, looks behind him.

DELL. Well, does it look like your sister’s in, Jack?

JACK. Well, I don’t know; she might be in the lav or something.

DELL. With the light off? Why should she be in the lav with the light off? No, anyway, Joan doesn’t use the toilet anymore, Jack. Going to the toilet is a too intimate act for her these days. See, she might accidently touch her hairy twat or her arse hole, and it might give her the wrong message, see. She might come over all flushed and get funny ideas, ideas she can no longer follow through on. Or if she does, it’ll take her a full bloody two hours to get herself off.

JACK. Oh, when will she be back then?

DELL. How do I know when she’ll be back? Why, you on the old scrounge again are you, Jack?

JACK. No. (JACK starts pumping his dumbbells) I was just wondering is all.

DELL. You come all the way down here from your bedsit then did you, pumping your arms, just because you were wondering if your sister was in or not? And what were you just wondering at, Jack? Joan, she’s not your flaming keeper you know. Joan is not her brother’s bloody financial keeper.

JACK. I know, I know, I only wanted to speak to her is all. It’s really hot in here, Dell.

DELL. It’s always hot in here. It’s the hot pipes. They’re hot.

Pause

DELL. Can I ask my