The Pre-Natal Agreement: A simple guide for aspiring parents.

By John Oakley McElhenney

The Pre-Natal Agreement is a call-to-action. Dads are equal parents. It’s time for dads to take full responsibility for our participation in raising our kids. From the day they are born, both parents must agree to sharing the joy as well as the hard work that goes into raising healthy and happy children.

This agreeme

• Language: English
• Publisher: John McElhenney
• Release date: Dec 12, 2019
• ISBN: 9781087856353

Book preview

Introduction

John McElhenney has been processing his divorce since 2010 on his internationally acclaimed blog The Whole Parent. The Pre-Natal Agreement was created on November 20th,  2019, in a blog post about divorce, A Rebirth of the Compassionate Parent & Divorced Dad Advocate. John believes in 50/50 shared parenting before and after divorce, and is working with Texas and national lobby groups to establish 50/50 custody as the starting point for a divorce between parents. He is an author and national speaker on parenting, divorce, and dating again. His latest book, A Good Dad’s Guide to Divorce is available on Amazon.

I wish you safety, happiness, health, and an ease of life on your journey.

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The Pre-Natal Agreement

We are agreeing to bring children into the world as 50/50 co-parents.

If our relationship fails, regardless of the circumstances, we agree to continue co-parenting with a 50/50 custody agreement, parenting schedule and shared financial responsibility.

To avoid unnecessary trauma and hardship to either parent, this agreement will supersede any divorce decree or lawsuit filed underprotest by either parent.

Signed & dated DAD:

Signed & dated MOM:

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The Pre-Natal Agreement Discussion

Let’s talk about becoming parents and what that means for both us, as a couple, and our potential children.

First, let’s agree that parenting is a huge responsibility. Once we’ve set these little beings on the planet beside us, they are here forever. Our relationship, our marriage, might not last, but our bonds as parents and our bonds with our kids are permanent and immutable. What is important to understand is that our relationship with our kids supersedes all other relationships. You will understand this better once your children have arrived. The universe is altered forever. For good, yes. But things will never be the same after you become a parent.

So, let’s pause for a minute and discuss just how we are going to move forward as parents and co-parents. Let’s set some expectations and agreements in place BEFORE we become parents. That way, even as our lives are upended with the hurricane of love, that is raising a newborn, we have some safeguards and promises in place. Here’s what I’m talking about.

Before we agree to have kids, we need to understand the equality of