Thoughts from My Heart

By Kay Lawrence

Lupus is an auto immune, connective tissue disease, to which there is no cure. It
renders the immune system incapable of differentiating between good and bad pathogens.
It causes the immune system to attack the hosts body, causing inflammation and breakdown of tissues, eventually causing multiple organ failure and death. Finding herself in this situation, Kays choice was to either seek Gods face or turn away. Being constantly reminded of Gods sovereignty through the many mercies and grace that she had received during the illness, she chose to have a close relationship with God, abiding in him daily. She finds comfort, and relief in knowing that God has providence over her life, and nothing touches her without first going through Him. She prays that as you read these poems you may be encouraged to seek an abiding relationship with the Lord.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Xlibris US
• Release date: May 28, 2013
• ISBN: 9781483640426

Kay Lawrence

Kay Elizabeth Grant Lawrence was born on August 7, 1970, in Montego Bay, Jamaica. She is the wife of retired Marine James Lawrence, and the mother of two children. After receiving her BS in Jamaica she completed a MEd in Curriculum and Instruction. Her diverse educational career has allowed her to teach worldwide. In 2006 she developed a blood clot in her brain. While pondering what she thought was a “tragedy”, she found solace in serving the elderly and homeless in her local church ministry. It was also in this period of seeking answers, that her deep intimacy with Christ, and sense of purpose to service were developed. Kay knew God had given her a new path, not to serve classrooms, but a passion to channel the hurt that she was feeling. Kay decided to become a Chaplain, she wanted to minister to the sick, and care for those who shared her sorrow in the journey of chronic illnesses, like Systemic Lupus. God introduced her to Clinical Pastoral Education. She took several semesters of CPE at Florida Hospital Tampa. Kay’s greatest fulfi llment comes from visiting and interacting with her patients. She ministers through reading her poetry, prayer and singing for those who need her special touch.

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Copyright © 2013 by Kay Lawrence.

Cover Photo by Bernice Denslow

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the copyright owner.

Rev. date: 05/22/2013

To order additional copies of this book, contact:

Xlibris Corporation

1-888-795-4274

www.Xlibris.com

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Contents

Mercy Changed Me

Closer

Affirmation

If

The Sun

Upright

Standard

Saturation

Honor

Lonely Heart

The Cross

Speak

Angels

Living water

New Start

Fixed On You

Before Me

Protector

Crown Him

Healing

That I May Know

Sabbath Rest

Give me Faith

My Delight

Best Day

String

In the Morning

Reliability

Bringing me Over

Poor

Fire next Time

Pessimistic

Flames

Take my Sorrows

My Mother

My Father

Heart of Love

Your Will

How Beautiful

Dance

Love Devine

The Joy of the Lord

Thank You For Life

Fear Not

Hold Me Lord

Never Let Me Fall

Thirst Again

We Honor You

Call On Jesus

Wanting You

Vulnerability

Molding

The shepherd

He Called My Name

Hear My Cry

Morning

Happiness

The Hands Of Time

Darkness

If I Were A Butterfly

Comfort From Pain

Freedom

The Hem Of His Garment

Pray Without Ceasing

Call On Jesus

The Reason Why I Cried

Available

Feathers of Faith

Beginnings

I Buried My Child Today

Going Home

Press On

Cure

Unbroken

The Test

Satin Moon

Fear

Prayerfully Ask

Take My Fears Away

Blessed

I Love Him

Precious Lord

The Gift

I surrender

I Will Bless the lord

Perfect Love

Awake My Soul

Blue Skies

Speak Lord

Thinking About You

He Cares

Shine on me

The Change

Never Know

God understand

Grace

Creation

Honest Part

Salvation

Thanksgiving

A Leaders Prayer

Close to My Heart

The Word

My Husband

Children

Tithe

Pure Love

Lover

Magnified and Blessed

Bills

Breathe on me

He Is Divine

My Temple

Trust in God

Clean Heart

I need you Lord

Quiet place

Guide Me

I Come

My child

Worship

He Heals

Praise I bring

Bill collector

Examine me

The Tongue

I give you

You are ever so near

Heaven

Just Smile

Sabbath

VIP

Night

Live

Sunshine

Amazing

Different

Beauty

Wings

My Soul

Wounded

More

Look Back

Us

Love like this

Hold me

Me

Early

Humble

Servitude

Reflection

Caramel

Early

Woman

Fertile Ground

Living God

Sphere

Snatched

Proof

So Big

Rescue

Think

Ravaged

Conquer

In Your Way

Lupus

Seed

Go

Storage

Hospital

Passion

Pain

My Stone

Black Rose

My Sleep

Today

Did I

Cheers

Humming Bird

My Hollow

Free to give

How close

Better Man

Will you still love me?

Treasures

Wisdom

Today Again

I followed Life

Give me strength

But for a time

The Love In Me

My River

No one cares

Gently

Again

I saw the Lord

The Avenues

My Child

Leave me a Legacy

The Potter

Last Night

Crossroads

Highway

Why Lord

Mother Nature

He Called

Make Me A Voice

Celebrate Life

Life

Nurse

Still

Ease

Mercy Changed Me

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Oh God I have wasted so many years, so many years of my life

Doing nothing just frolicking and telling lies

I have let the devil used me to do his deceitful trials

But now I am free his bondage I so despise

The blood has washed me grace has freed me

But mercy your mercy has changed me completely

No one could have known no one could tell how deep in sin I truly dwell

I was a church going Christian in my own little shell

Sitting in the pews on my way to hell

With a desire for God I did not know how to find

Sin had confined me pretense was my demise

One day I fell ill as ill as could be

Jesus Christ had compassion and wanted to purify me

My body he placed in a fire burned with cold

Like rare and fine gold he strained sift and mold

A process so painful yet seem so divine

Because all the way through he kept his eyes on mine

Now I praise him unending with heart soul and mind

Now nothing can sever this everlasting tie

Christ is my fortress he is my rock

He is my comfort when I am overwhelmed with shock

I will wait for perfection from him whom I love

I will dwell in his presence and his enduring love

When my storm clouds gather when my petal won’t bloom

When Satan tries to enter and I don’t know what to do

I just call on Jesus and he sees me through.

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Closer

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Each day I get closer to Jesus trying to find my way

Each day I get closer to Jesus closer to his heart I go

Trying to find the answers I have always wanted to know

Just why he came to save me

Even when I did not want to go

Each day I get closer to Jesus closer to his heart I go

Nearer to the heart of Jesus, because he loves me so.

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Affirmation

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Loving the Lord what a joy divine.

Loving the Lord because he is mine.

Tender thoughts he speaks inside my heart.

Gentle mists from the Spirit affirm my lips.

Shivers fill my spine as his presence is so divine.

Peace overflows me that is so sublime.

I stood still, perfectly still, as if time has no meaning.

Time has no essence.

A relationship with my loving savior means everything.

Loving the Lord, what a joy divine.

Loving the Lord Jesus Christ, because, I am his and he is mine.

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If

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If it means my life to save a soul

If it means my hands for a sinner to grab hold

If it means my heart to love without fear

If it means my soul to give compassion the way Jesus cares

If it means my whole for you Lord

I have nothing, nothing, nothing, to spare.

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The Sun

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I set the sun upon my face

To shine through me all day

Knowing very well I could not