My Heart Bleeds

By Christopher Havenga

The story line tends to jump between the present and the pre Victorian era (middle ages). When people were enchanted by the idea of witchcraft, vampirism, goals and goblins. Etc.
This creates a storyline that is easy to follow and grabs the imagination, making it a pleasure to read.
The characters in this book good as well as evil jumps out and becomes part of your everyday life till the last page of this book.
There is also love visible in the story, concern, respect and passion is shown throughout.
The imagination of the writer entwines unreal with real in everyday life.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Partridge Publishing Africa
• Release date: May 11, 2016
• ISBN: 9781482862140

Christopher Havenga

Christopher Havenga is a romantic at heart. His writing reflects a lot of his personal life experiences. Creating fictional characters to fit in with his storyline to fit in with his writings, short stories and books. That makes this novel a pleasure to read.

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Copyright © 2016 by Christopher Havenga.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the author except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

www.partridgepublishing.com/africa

Acknowledgement

Firstly: Thank You God for giving me this gift and love for writing. To My Precious Desert Flower: Thank you for being the inspiration for this book. Always and forever my love. To family and friends that encouraged me to write this book, helping with the re-writing and reading; I thank each and every one of you. To the Poets pub in Wales: Thanks for making your pub a very pleasurable experience for my writing. Most of all to Partridge Africa for putting my manuscript together and the printing of it. I thank you

Brandy was sitting on the porch of the wine estate, where she was working for the last five months. I’m so over this day, she said to herself, while she looked over the lushes green grass and the beautiful green of the winery that was slowly moving like ballerinas in the late afternoon breeze.

She wiped the tiredness from her eyes, took the biggish wine glass in her hand. The dark red colour of the wine in the glass mesmerized her in such a way, that all was forgotten in that short while. She rolled the glass in small circular movements and watched as the red fluid within moved in coordination with her hand movements. The day was long and she had done so much these last couple of months. Brandy was so tired that she could not even keep her eyes open. Looking at her watch she took another sip of the strong wooden taste the wine had to offer.

She rolled the fluid over her tongue taking in every aroma the wine had to offer her taste buds. It was only ten past six, but she felt drained. I’m so over this day she thought to herself as she slowly swallowed. With the days takings still spread out in front of her, she blinked her eyes to try and shake off the tiredness she was feeling. With one more sip of the wine, she held the contents in her mouth like before while she went over the takings of the kitchen, winery and the restaurant.

The numbers swam in front of her watery eyes, I can’t take this anymore! She said aloud. Brandy dropped the papers back onto the table, blinked and looked out over the lushes fields again. I’ll pick the rest of this mess up in the morning, she thought to herself. Think I’ll take the rest of the night off and just relax. Ha ha she laughed at the thought; she could not remember the last time she had time on her hands to just relax.

She has been so busy; she can’t even remember what it felt like to relax. Countless days, weeks and months had past, yet every day she worked till the late hours of the evening. Brandy can’t remember the last time she actually had eight hours of sleep. Well tonight will be the night that I will have this eight hours of sleep that my body craves, she said to herself. She closed the blue folders that was holding the account details and took in a deep breath.

She took another sip of the wine, as the tastes filled her mouth and pricked every single taste bud on her tongue, she closed her eyes and let her head fall back, enjoying every wonderful feeling that had to offer. She felt as the worries and the stress evaporate from her body and for a brief moment she felt as if she could breathe the first time in a long while.

At that moment all was forgotten, she listened to the soft mesmerising sound of the wind, as it majestically moved in its invincibility in between the green trees and the long rows of vineyards. As she relaxed with her head still to the back the night creatures made themselves known by conversing in their own orchestra for the world to know where they are.

Suddenly there was a familiar sound that made her sit up straight. At first her face was emotionless as she stared at the screen, but then she gently smiled as the name on the screen became visible. The dark bold letter read Chad, and she automatically felt the sense of happiness brew within her.

The two of them have been friends for many years, and in the last couple of months they have become very fond of each other, but reality kept them at bay, she was in a very serious relationship, but sadly she was not very happy. Non-the-less she still loved her fiancé. But there was something about Chad that made her feel different, she felt appreciated when he spoke to her in such soft and sensual tones.

He texted her almost every day that made her feel wanted. She couldn’t help herself but smile as she read the first text. Hallo my beautiful friend. She texted back and smiled as she and him conversed over texting. So minutes rolled by, she felt happy while reading and sending messages, while she was slowly sipping on her wine. All was forgotten, the stress and the worries of that day disappeared.

When Brandy looked up from her screen, the sun had already made its descent over the grey mountains, and all that was left of the beautiful image that she took in only hours ago, was this grey version of the green winery. But even this dark grey image was beautiful and she stared out over the veranda and captured every last elegance that the cape had to offer.

As the last ray of sunlight disappeared over the top of the mountain, she watched as the lights of the buildings were being switched on. One by one every room on the wine estate lit up in a golden flash, Brandy marvelled at the beauty of this place even at night. She watched as the front lights lit up the wonderful ivory white walls of the entrance, the green of the grass sparkled as the fresh dew drops of that evening came to rest upon the tips. The darkness of the gravel road stood out, as they two were laden with the dew drops of the evening.

This is where I want to be, she said to herself. No matter how much stress I have to face every day, this image makes it all worth the while. As she brought the glass closer, she noticed that the contents were done, she sat up and reached for the bottle of Shiraz, and slowly she lifted it up and saw that it two was empty. As she stood up to go and get another bottle, she tripped over the leg of the cast iron chair she was sitting on.

Completely caught off guard, still dazed from the conversation she was having with Chad, her reflexes was to slow, before she could get her footing she fell forward. With a wine bottle in the left hand and the wine glass in her right. At that moment everything was moving in slow motion, she blinked her eyes multiple times as she descended downwards. Her body was stretched out and she knew that she would hit the wooden veranda with a hard thump. What was weirder about this whole experience was the fact that she could look around her, she could spot all that could go wrong in that short amount of time of her decent.

She has to decide what to let go of, for if she wants to cause herself the minimum amount of damage, she has to stop herself with her hands. For if she does not keep hold of the glass and the bottle she would hit her head hard on the floor. And if the glass breaks it would cause major damage to her hand, if the glass cuts her.

At that point she let go of the bottle and before she could let go of the glass. She watched her hand with the wine glass still firmly gripped hit the wooden deck. She watched as her hand took the full blow of the impact, eyes fixed as the blood ran to the pressure points, then in slow motion she watched the glass in her hand shatter. Broken glass went in all directions; she closed her eyes and felt as small fragments of glass hit her face with such force, she felt small splinters of glass prick at her closed eyes and her sensitive skin.

Then the familiar feeling of warm blood made her open her eyes, with the stem of the glass still clamped in her bloody hand, she looked around her and for a brief moment felt like she wanted to cry, but she took in a deep breath and kept her composure. There is no need for you to cry like a silly girl, she said to herself. That was another thing she had to teach herself over the years, she had to fight for what she wanted in life, nothing ever came easy and she was at that place in time because of hard work.

The pain shot through her hand the moment she lifted it from the floor. As she sat herself down on the wooden floor, she watched as the ruby red blood flew over her hand like a tap that was opened over it. She gently took the stem with her other hand and placed it on the floor next to her. She investigated the wound on her bloody hand, a deep gash was visible on her palm, and a few small laceration wounds on other parts of her hand, but that was of little concern now.

Blood was oozing from the laceration as her heart was pumping blood through her veins by her quickened heartbeat. For a few seconds she was just sitting there clasping the wounded hand with the other. Confident that she stopped most of the bleeding, slowly she stood up and walked into her chalet straight to the bathroom where she took a towel and wrapped it around the bleeding hand. Most of the adrenalin had worn off as she felt her hand slowly started to thump from the pain.

One handed she opened the tap and let the water run for a while; she clenched her teeth and braced herself for the stinging pain she will feel. She closed her eyes as she removed the towel from her hand, she placed her reddish hand under the running water, and felt as the clean cold water stung the sensitive opened wound. She screamed out from the pain that was flowing through her hand and upper arm, but then she heard a strange sound from outside and she halted, she focussed her hearing on the outside, for an instant it sounded like that someone was screaming with her.

There are small night animals that run around in the night, maybe a small jackal caught a one of the farm workers chickens, and howled out with triumph after the kill? But it didn’t sound like a jackal. It sounded human; she felt her skin crawl at the thought. But it was harder and more frightful than a scream of a human. It sounded like a shriek like something evil screaming from the deepest darkest corner of the earth.

She listened for a few seconds in complete silence, and when she couldn’t hear anything else but the small insects of the night she focussed all her attention on her wounded.

Chad was sitting on the chair in his study/bar area, while he listened to the old classics only one woman came to mind. And that was Brandy, funny that he was thinking that, for the music was something that made him think of his past, how the music moved him and made him feel. But this brown headed, brown eyed woman was the only one he could think of these last couple of months. When times got bad and he could not carry on any more, he would send her a text, and when she replied he felt the world fade away and that feeling of comfort and belonging took over.

Just the fact that she texted back made him feel wanted and needed. So when he got sad and the depression formed a huge dark cloud over his life, he would text her and all will be forgotten for that brief moment that they would chat.

So as he took the phone and wrote the sentence that he knew would make her smile, halo my beautiful friend. He waited a few seconds and then he saw her reply, hey babe how are you? That brief moment made him smile, and every hair on his arms and the back of his neck stood up. For those couple of months made him feel needed, wanted and cared for. Over the last couple of months him and her conversed over very deep matter that was happening in their lives. And Chad came to love her from a distance, at times he got cross, for she was in the arms of another, and all he wanted was her, for him. But he respected her choices in life and as a good friend he kept his distance. But these last couple of moths all that she could talk about was that she was so unhappy in her current relationship.

As a good friend he gave her advice about how to work on her relationship, but in the back of his mind all he could think was, that she must leave this bloke that does not respect or deserve her. She must leave him and come to him, he would give her all the love she ever wanted and needed. But that only happened in fairytales, for she was many leagues above him. She was smart and gorgeous and so successful in life. And he was a common bloke with not much to offer in life but love and respect, and he always thought that she wanted more than that, after all she was use to pampering and only the best in life.

She is too beautiful for you my man, he thought to himself as he texted back. But he wanted her badly, he wanted to take her into his arms and hold her close, and there were countless night that he thought about her in a sexual way. He knew it was wrong but he could not help himself. He imagined that he would take her in his arms, kiss her soft lips gently. Slowly moving his hand down to her waist to the soft warm place of her womanhood. That thought came to mind again, he felt his manhood stir and he moved uncomfortably in his chair.

He wanted to push her against a wall, push her arms to the top, kiss her neck gently while he grinded against her, he wanted to undress her, and marvel at her naked beauty, take her nipple in his mouth, suck gently on it till it hardened in his mouth. He wanted to hear her moan from pleasure that he was giving her. He wanted to lie her down on his bed and make love to her, soft gentle love. Chad wanted to take in all that her body could offer. But most of all he wanted to make her climax; he wanted to make her love juices flow. That would give him so much pleasure.

Chad was all worked up, he moved uncomfortably in his chair, he let the thoughts drift from his mind and turned his attention back to the conversation he was having with Brandy. He read the next text, I really miss you! He could not believe his eyes, she misses him, this made him smile and admire this woman even more. Excited he replied back, your words fill my heart with so much happiness! I miss you too! But the happy feeling was short lived, for he knew that she was not his, and that he has to keep his distance. But that short wile when they chatted he felt that she was his and that’s all that mattered. He could go into the fairytale of him and her being together.

It was a silly thing to do and he knew that he can and would get hurt, by wanting someone else’s woman. But she was so intriguing and he was so in love with her. All the things pointed to disaster but he could not help feeling for this remarkable woman. He turned up the volume on his radio, laid back and listened to the song, while he went over his thoughts and what the hell he could do to make his life more complicated. He laughed at the thought and took another sip of his beer.

There was so much going on in his own life that he didn’t need to complicate it even more, with things that might never happen. But he could not help himself; this woman was like a drug to him. He needed and wanted what she had to offer. Just like the forbidden fruit that they speak of in the bible. She was not allowed to be touched and he knew it. But he wanted her so badly, no matter what the consequences might be. He knew that it didn’t end well for Adam and Eve, and he knew that this will not end up well for him. He gobbled down the last of the beer, and feeling down again he looked at the screen. And there it was a text he never thought would ever come from her. I need you! How could this be possible? He thought to himself, this remarkable woman needed him; maybe she is just playing the fool. For they always do so too each other.

I need you too! He replied, anxious about what she would say, he went to the fridge and opened another beer. He tried not to look at the phone for he didn’t want to be too hasty for a reply. So he sat down trying to be as calm as possible, he heard the vibration of the phone. He wanted to grab it but he restricted himself. Slowly he took a sip of the cold beer, and looked at the room he was sitting in. All his favourite rugby teams’ flags were nicely displayed on the walls. He looked at the dartboard on the wall, and thought about the last time he actually threw a dart into the damn thing.

Then his eyes went to the bar that was neatly displayed in the far corner of the room. He admired this wooden thing, for his grandfather built it with his own two hands, a very piece indeed. He kept her waiting long enough, he reached for the phone, and what he read made him sit up straight and blink his eyes uncontrollably to make sure he was not reading the text wrong. Come and visit me he read the dark black letter on his cell phone screen are you serious? He replied. Yes she immediately wrote back. Ecstatic about what she asked he directly went too his laptop and went online and booked the first flight from Johannesburg to Cape Town.

I’m going to fetch some more wine, he read he reply. Chad smiled and left it that. After he finished beer, he checked and saw that she hasn’t replied. Concerned he texted her asking if she was okay? After a couple of minutes he received a reply. I’m fine thanks, just fell and cut myself. So I’m not in a good mood anymore, I’ll say good night, sweet dreams speak to you when I can. Concerned he said hope you are okay and that she must let him know if she needed any help. Thanks she wrote back. Chad went to bed, excited that he will see her on Friday. He closed his eyes and smiled at the thought of being close to her.

The ruby red blood that was seeping from Brandy’s wound a couple of minutes ago were now gently spreading over the dry wooden floor of the veranda. The coolness in the air was slowly stalling the dark reed liquid. The contents came close to the gap between the wooden planks; slowly the blood moved downward, a drop was forming at the bottom, as gravity set in the drop gained in weight and size. Hanging there on a thread of its own contents it lay there weightless like a ripe plum, just waiting to be plucked by the sheer force of nature.

The wind picked up and slowly and silently the red ruby drop moved from side to side rocking in the hands of the invincible wind. Then all of a sudden the sheer weight of the drop got too much and it dropped a few meters and splattered soundless on the soft earth

The dry earth seeped in the liquid and before long the splattered red blood was nothing more than a dark spot on the dark brown earth. The blood moved over the gravel particles and in between the gaps they left resting next and on top of each other. Like a river the small amount of liquid made its way downwards. Mixing with the smaller ground particles the blood became like syrup and before long came to a complete standstill through the sheer force of its thickness.

But under the ground just inches from where the thick blood was slowly stalling lay a body, grey from years under the ground. No sunlight has touched it for many years. But yet the body was still intact. The grey skin was unblemished and no decomposing was visible on any part of this person. Slowly the gravel around the face started to move. Small particles of ground rolled from the face, cart wheeling in its small brilliance down the forehead all the way down the nose and then came to a sudden halt at the chin. Suddenly the nose of the body moved from side to side, something stirred within this person, and then after many years of restless sleep, its eyes opened. Grey as that of its skin, it looked around, at first confused of its surroundings, but as he blinked in the compact ground he found himself in, he noticed that where he is was where he buried himself many years ago.

But now something awoke him, and it took him a couple of seconds to realise what it was. He grinned under the pressure of the ground, she has come to me again, he thought to himself. Just the sheer sent of her blood awakened him, but he needs to taste her blood before he can break free from this earthly hell.

The strong iron smell of her blood was close, so close that he can estimate when last it was spilled. I have to get it! He said aloud. Slowly he moved his head from side to side, and gradually the gravel parted and before long he could move his head without trouble. But this took a lot of energy from him, he was after all in the ground for many years, fatigue was visible all over his face, and after a couple of minutes of struggle he felt his body aching from the effort to clear himself from the ground.

He took deep breaths, and knew that he will not stay awake for long before he suffocated in this cramped up place. He got agitated from being this week; he has never been this week. He took another couple of deep breaths, his agitation and anger gave him the strength to get his shoulders and part of his arms free. The iron smell of the blood became stronger and before long he dug with his freed hand at the gravel that was on top of him. He felt light headed, but he knew that he had to carry on for he could sense that the warm sweet taste of the blood was closer. Anger took over as he used the last bit of his energy to grasp at the darkness of the dirt for the liquid that he knows woke him that liquid will give him the strength to get out of this fucking hole. As a crack head seeking the smell of the white smoke that he heats up in the spoon, so the smell of her blood sends him into a frantic state.

I got to have it he screamed out aloud, his grasp at the unseen blood became weaker and before long he felt the last strength flow from his arm as he dug a handful of dirt. The last handful was too much effort, but something was different, the handful of dirt was not as dry as the rest of the dirt around him, it felt moist…then the smell of the blood filled his nostrils with a sense if weight that it almost suffocated him. At last he thought to himself. With his last efforts he held the dirt to his mouth and squeezed with the last of his strength. He watched in the darkness as a small droplet formed from the compressed gravel, and then it fell from the endless grip of the earth around it. He watched as the droplet came falling down in what like felt like forever. He opened his mouth wide and stuck his dry tongue out to catch the small drop.

The moment the droplet landed on his dried out tongue, he tasted the strong iron in it, and he knew that it was hers. The red fluid filled every crack on his tongue and slowly made its way into every fibre of his inner mouth and face, sending small impulses through his body. He felt the strength of that one drop of blood fill his mind and head, he knew he needed more. He squeezed the damp gravel in his hand with more power, and a couple of more drops of blood fell on his tongue and into the back of his throat. Strength and life filled his body and his old aged heart gained life and started pumping the essence of strength and life the blood held.

The power of the blood took over; he took a deep breath, closed his eyes and with one fierce push with his arms and upper body the heavy gravel that kept him buried for a century fell from him effortlessly. Within a blink of an eye he was standing straight up, the amazing buzz and thrill that he felt from this woman’s blood made him scream out in the dark air of the night. With this new extraordinary power he looked about him and knew he had to feed fast, before this power exceeds its life span. Knowing that this couple of drops of her blood will only carry him for a couple of minutes. It is crucial that he finds someone or something to feed on. He looked about him and saw that the night was deserted, no being was visible, and slowly he stepped from the shallow grave that kept him imprisoned for a