Bittersweet Nightshade

By Yew Baneberry

Cheshire lived in a world of childhood fantasy. Books had fed her comfort through the rough years of adolescence. They had become her friends and companions. They comforted her in the darkest hour of the blackest night when no lullaby could hush the fear that crept up from the shadows. It was her upcoming graduation that made her realize that the world her books had created was crumbling. She would soon have to abandon the lyrical realm of fantasy, that fi lled her with hope, for the melancholy reality which dictated her future.

Graduation was a funeral march. The only thing that Cheshire had to look forward to was the after party that her friend Seanna had coerced her into attending. Cheshire would rather have stayed home in the comfort of one of her paperback companions, but she would follow Seanna to the end of the world. That was the power Seanna held over her. It was at the party that Cheshires world took a turn into a realm of confusion, deception, and the painful struggle for survival. There she met Mario.

Mario made her feel alive. He made her feel whole. She felt that she could handle the darkness of reality with him beside her. Mario would be the death of her. Cheshire had never suspected the journey that destiny had planned out for her. Thrown into a world of beauty, overshadowed by a dark sorceress, Cheshire must uncover the power that was given to her at birth. She must overcome her fears and self-doubt to free the world that she spent her entire life dreaming of. Cheshire never would have thought that, in death, she would have to fi ght to keep her dreams alive more than she ever fought to live.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Xlibris US
• Release date: Oct 16, 2007
• ISBN: 9781469108438

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Copyright © 2007 by Yew Baneberry.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form

or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by

any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the

copyright owner.

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents either are the product

of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to any actual

persons, living or dead, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.

This book was printed in the United States of America.

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Contents

CHAPTER ONE

CHAPTER TWO

CHAPTER THREE

CHAPTER FOUR

CHAPTER FIVE

CHAPTER SIX

CHAPTER SEVEN

CHAPTER EIGHT

CHAPTER NINE

CHAPTER TEN

CHAPTER ELEVEN

CHAPTER TWELVE

CHAPTER THIRTEEN

CHAPTER FOURTEEN

CHAPTER FIFTEEN

CHAPTER SIXTEEN

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

CHAPTER NINETEEN

CHAPTER TWENTY

CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE

CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO

CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE

CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR

CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE

CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX

CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN

CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT

CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE

CHAPTER THIRTY

CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE

CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO

CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE

CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR

CHAPTER THIRTY-FIVE

CHAPTER THIRTY-SIX

CHAPTER THIRTY-SEVEN

CHAPTER THIRTY-EIGHT

CHAPTER THIRTY-NINE

CHAPTER FORTY

CHAPTER FORTY-ONE

CHAPTER ONE

The ocean roared beneath her windowsill. The waves teased her as they danced freely beneath the sky. It was a waltz that she had witnessed since childhood, yet it had never before felt as though the ocean was taunting her with its freedom. It was then that she realized that she was finally an adult. She was forced to wonder if she would end up like her own parents: filled with greed and lust for the power that money brought. She did not feel as though she belonged there. It was something that dawned upon her while the waves crashed below. Each wave forced a new thought into her mind. Each thought was a question that she did not want to ask or answer. Her world was beginning to engulf her in a swirling envelope of confusion. Every moment that ticked away tore a chunk right out of her soul.

Slowly, with painful remorse, Cheshire began to think of the future. She did not know what she wanted out of life, but she knew that no matter what happened to her it would not be as interesting as any of the books she had read. Cheshire had prided herself in reading and exploring imaginary worlds. She had taken great lengths to create a place for herself within each and every one of the books she loved so dearly. She had even written her own fantasy stories. They had given her an outlet, a sanctuary, and an escape from her reality that felt too constricting at times. Her stories had given her a sense of completion in a way that every day life had never been able to. The stories that she wrote were her salvation from reality. In them she could be anyone and do anything or go anywhere she pleased. There were no societal restrictions on proper behavior or monetary lines that dictated friends and enemies. There existed no boundaries unless she created them. There she could birth an existence where she felt at home. In those worlds she was free to dream of extraordinary creatures and adventures that she could only hope to happen in reality. Reality, the word fell from her lips like a eulogy. It was a mourning song for her imaginary world and she was forced to think about her true existence. She stared over at her desk where the invitation to her graduation lay dormantly. The gold and red ribbons that decorated the plain, white card assaulted her vision. They demanded her attention, but her heart hated the sight of them. The dawning of her graduation felt more like a funeral than anything else to her. She would soon have to leave all of her fantasies behind and march forward towards an unknown future in a world where she was ostracized for her detachment from its money-hungry, materialistic hierarchy.

The ocean once again distracted Cheshire. The salty sea air forced her curtains to bellow out. They caressed her face softly in cold wisps of silken fabric as tears fell freely from her quivering eyes. It’s a trap, she whispered to the wind feeling that being an adult had made her age far beyond her years. To comfort herself she walked over to the bookcase beside the window and removed a random book. She flopped down on the bed. Her hands traced the pages knowingly. Images flashed through her mind. A peasant fighting, the good fight, against evil knights. She imagined dying for something she believed in. Dying so that others could be free. Her heart fluttered and her mind drifted to another world momentarily. The sound of the waves brought her back. Doesn’t everyone dream of being something they’re not? She mused as the ocean’s song crescendoed. The fading rays of daylight lapped upon her bare skin and Cheshire glanced up at the clock. It was almost time for graduation. A frown fell upon her porcelain face. She wanted to just drift off to another world on a cloud. She wanted to abandon that world and all of its trivialities. Her body moved slowly as though it was waking from a numbing dream. It felt like she was literally pulling herself from some other reality. Her shimmering, emerald eyes surveyed the room while she leaned against the wall. They were changing, even then, as she looked at the confines she inhabited for the duration of her life. She would never see the room the same way again. Even if it never changed, she would, and that notion made her tremble.

Cheshire’s eyes traversed the crevices of the room memorizing the years that she had passed within the thick walls. It was large even by the standards of the mansions that lined the small island. Books adorned the walls from ceiling to floor where shelves had been carved into the cobblestone of the ancient house. Her hand trembled over the aging spines of her paperback playmates. For a moment she imagined that she was in another world, that she was someone else, and that there was no ending to her fairy tale. For a moment she was gone and everything seemed peaceful. Then the sea crashed outside the window frame and Cheshire jumped. Her eyes returned to perusing the bookshelves. There was no free space amongst them, yet Cheshire still had piles of books that lay, awaiting a resting place, in boxes under the bed and in the closet. Hundreds of books filled the room making it brighter with an ecstatic plea of colors. Most of them Cheshire had read so many times that she could recite passages from memory. They had been her consorts through the dark rages of adolescence. She could never abandon the beauty that lay within their well-traveled pages. They were the only friends she had truly had. The only ones that had never tried to ground her in reality. She walked to the bed where she had slept for the past seventeen years of her life. Her delicate hands touched the soft silk of the crimson fabric. The feeling sent a chill rallying up her spine like an electric shock filtering into her brain. She looked down at the bed with mourning eyes and remembered all of her childhood fears that had manifested in nightmares. She remembered having once feared the ocean’s song believing that it was the screeching symphony of some mythological monster calling forward her death. Moisture traced the jagged edge of her lighted face and Cheshire shook herself. She realized that all of those things, the memories and dreams of her childhood, would have to be pushed into the back of her mind until she could dream again, if ever. Finally she nodded to herself, satisfied with the way she had spent the younger years of her life, then turned carrying only a duffle bag and a head full of dying dreams.

For all the years that Cheshire had spent in high school she had never really imagined graduation to be something so dull. The way everyone had spoken about it, she had believed that it would be a ceremony to set her free. Upon reaching her senior year Cheshire had only felt more trapped by the upcoming, pre-planned future her parents had set out for her. She sat amongst her peers as their class song played. There was no pang of sadness for leaving high school, no tears of regret or lost memories. She felt no thirst for more time among her classmates and no shock of excitement towards the future. Cheshire simply sat there, numb and indifferent, as though the past four years of high school had been nothing more than a dream. A dream which was already fading from her waking conscious. While other graduates glanced nervously at their friends or wiped tears from their quiet eyes, Cheshire stared blankly down at her sandaled feet and imagined herself in a place far away traversing the Amazon rain forest. Among the deep, green foliage she was free to see the world as none had ever seen it before. Wild and glorious, the colors of life sprang forth around her filling her with a feeling of immortality. For a moment she could fly. She was there with the birds high above the trees upon a spiraling star. She was shooting through the vibrant canopy as branches and leaves slithered against her skin. Cheshire Galleo. Cheshire gulped quietly and maneuvered herself around the other students enshrouded in golden robes. She felt that it was a funeral shroud as she climbed the stairs to the stage. It was like climbing up to the gallows or walking the length of a plank hovering above shark-infested waters.

Staring out at the faces she only saw blurs of childhood recollections. A playmate here, a birthday party invitation in the third row, a boy who had once asked her out, someone from English class, an associate from horse back riding lessons, and then in the fifth row Seana. For a moment Cheshire was quiet. She simply watched the blank stares and shifting eyes of the audience as she reached for her diploma. She breathed in deeply feeling that she was farther from being herself at that moment than at any other point in her existence. She had always been a shy girl, a girl set off from the rest of society, lost within her own world. Just the thought of standing in front of so many people made her queasy and she hurried herself from the stage. Her nervous anticipation had almost led to her forgetting that she was supposed to stop and pose with the principal, in a moment frozen, to remember the receipt of her diploma. She smiled glumly in the photograph and hoped that she would never have to see it because it felt like the final nail in the coffin of her youth.

Cheshire returned to her seat and fidgeted with the diploma. It was only a sheet of paper and a feeling of being lied to instilled itself within her. The paper that lay within the diploma’s golden case only said that her real diploma would be sent out in the mail. It was hard for her to imagine that the past four years had accumulated in a ceremony that meant nothing to her and a sheet of paper saying that her ticket to the future was in the mail. She turned around and saw Seana. A smile flitted over her face, but Seana’s face remained blank and unmoving. Cheshire’s shoulders slumped. She felt suddenly weary from thinking about the future and the past four years. They had gone by as any years had. They were neither extraordinary nor were they entirely empty of events, but they were only years. To Cheshire, their only purpose was to measure time. The speeches that continued meant nothing to her as they droned on about high school memories that Cheshire had failed to share. The ceremony ended in a goodbye speech from the faculty. Then the graduates were sent on their way, but most lingered in the hall attempting to hold on to any shred of their youth that they could. Her parents huddled around her as they exited the reception hall steering her towards the house before she could even bother to say goodbye to anyone.

Cheshire felt lost after graduation. She felt that there was no purpose left to anything anymore. It was as though all of the years of tedious studying had led to nothing more than a pat on the back and a slip of paper saying congratulations you did it! She knew that she was going to college and going to do something with her life, but what? Her mind reeled with incoherent questions as she walked alongside her chatting mother and father. She stared up at her father noting his graying temples and the dulling look in his dark eyes. Her mother’s hair was also graying, but the shimmering brown that once danced there still speckled the new silver locks that were a recent addition with age. They walked with each an arm around her shoulder conversing about her future and everything in it. It felt as though a tornado had caught Cheshire in its grasp and was spinning her around with no hope for escape. Suddenly, she stopped startling her parents into noticing her presence. What’s wrong Chess? Her father smiled down at her. His eyes perched above his spectacles and Cheshire felt the heavy cloud of overwhelming distress. She shook her head and pulled their arms off of her shoulders. I have to go, the words came out gasping as if the weight of existence was too much for her to bear at the moment. She turned and sped down the street. Her sandaled feet slapped noisily against the concrete, serenading the beating of her screaming heart. She ran until her lungs ached with torment and her body burned from exertion, but she felt better despite the oncoming journey towards her future. As she galloped through the streets her duffle bag banged harshly against her back with the weight of a child’s tantrum. After several blocks of her delicate feet beating against the pavement, she found herself stopping in front of Seana’s house gasping for air.

Cheshire knocked on the door, not wanting to ring the bell because it was far too loud and obnoxious. She gulped in air violently like a fish pulled out of the water. Her hair lay in a messy tangle of crimson circling her skull. Johnathan, the butler, answered the door with a smile. Hello Cheshire. He raised an eyebrow in question, but silenced himself. She’s in her room. How was graduation? Cheshire nodded and shrugged, It was okay I guess. You know . . . just putting on a show for the audience, right? She grinned politely, but happiness failed to paint itself in her face. Johnathan smiled and nodded as though he was some sort of a puppet. Go on up, she’s probably expecting you. With that, the aging butler sidled away. Cheshire snuck up the marbled stairs to Seana’s room, where she was hoping to find out if she was the only one feeling like a failure even after all of her accomplishments.

As Cheshire crept up the marbled stairs to Seana’s room, she thought about her only friend. There had never been a real friendship between them. It had been, more or less, a silent agreement in which they would hang out together so that they were never alone. Most of the time they remained silent in each other’s company. Cheshire was always reading a book. Seana was always rubbing the delicate, green vile that she wore around her neck as though it was a charm meant to save her life from some terrible fate. She often stared off into space and ignored Cheshire completely. There was something different about Seana. She was far from being a normal teen. Often, late at night, she would be found by the police stalking around the woods and lurking in the darkness. It was also not uncommon for her to go missing for several days at a time. She would simply return and no one cared enough to ask her where she had been. No one knew what drove Seana. One day, she had appeared with her parents like an unseen storm erupting upon the horizon. No one ever seemed to question where she had been before. Her parents were never there. They were always traveling for some reason or another and so Seana had free reign over her own life. Cheshire thought about the years that she had known Seana. They had been short and unceremonious. The years, actually, seemed like a dream. It felt as if Cheshire had never met Seana and it was all some sort of elaborate prank that her mind had decided to play upon her.

Seana was in the shower when Cheshire opened her bedroom door. Steam drifted into Seana’s room making the marble floor wet and slippery. Deciding it might be fun to prank her friend, Cheshire hid herself beneath the emerald-silk covered bed and lay quietly upon the cold, hard floor. After her shower, Seana stalked out in a towel. Steam curled around her elegant beauty almost as though it existed solely for her. She glanced around her room with a look on her face suggesting that she was lost. Books were nonexistent in Seana’s room. There was no vibrant splash of colorful teenage posters upon her walls or any suggestion of a personality. The walls were white marble, cold and smooth, just like the floor. There was a bed covered in sophisticated canopies of silken fabric and a closet. On the far side of the bedroom there was a window looking out at another row of mansions, but that was it. That was the simplicity that enshrouded Seana’s room. There was nothing that expressed who she was and no remnant that could prove she even existed there at all. Nothing could hint as to what she liked in hobbies or interests, other than her closet. Seana loved clothes, especially clothes that would reveal her own carved prettiness and curving figure. It seemed to many and most, the only thing Seana had ever loved, or would ever love, was herself.

Small beads of water still glistened decadently upon Seana’s chest as she walked gracefully towards her closet. Something seemed off-beat. She turned and glanced at her bed. Floating upon the emerald silk of her gigantic bed, a small package sat plainly on her pillow upon which a tiny tag said, drink me. After looking around for any signs of life, Seana said, slightly agitated, Come on Cheshire, I know it’s you. A sly giggle emitted from under the bed. She walked around the other way sneakily and grasped her friend’s fragile ankle, yanking hard to pull her from underneath. Ouch! That hurt.

Well you shouldn’t be hiding like that. What are you doing here anyway? Aren’t you supposed to be getting ready for the party? There was an authoritatively reprimanding tone in her slithering voice as if Cheshire had somehow ruined Seana’s plans. How’d you know it was me? Cheshire asked somewhat sulkily. I can’t wait for the party tonight. It’ll be great to get off this little island for once. Out into the real world. As Seana spoke, there was no emotion in it. It was as though she was reading from a script. There was something different about her voice though, there was something alive in it. It did not express Seana’s usual disinterest in life. There was an added energy to her pre-scripted words. Cheshire wondered if, in that moment, they had spoken more words to one another than in the entire space of their acquaintance. She shook her head and placed her hand on Seana’s shoulder, How did you know it was me? Seana scoffed, You’re the only person who lives in Alice’s Wonderland. Cheshire locked her hands on her hips and pouted, That’s not fair. Seana opened the closet door and began rummaging through the mountains of colorful fabric that exploded upon the dainty racks. Well you did it yourself. Cheshire threw herself upon Seana’s bed feeling the soft iciness of the silk against her warm flesh. No I didn’t . . . my mom named me after the Cheshire Cat . . . It was the truth. Cheshire’s mother had a strange fascination with children’s literature and had traveled all over the world believing that she could find a striped cat with mystical powers. Cheshire had come to believe that money made people crazy. Maybe her mother truly did think that money could make anything exist.

" . . . I have my stuff here, Johnathan let