Shadows of Us

By Sylvia C. Stowers

It is 1969 as Eileen Emerson points her car toward the California border. Eileen, who has always embraced her gift to see things not apparent to others, is used to keeping her abilities a secret. But thanks to a devoted mentor, Eileen is now heading toward a new job and beginning in San Diego. Nothing can stop her from achieving all she desiresor so she thinks.

David Hearst has just been discharged after serving in Vietnam. Unfortunately, killing has changed himand left him without much of a conscience at all. Now the caretaker of a multimillion dollar banking industry, his new hardened frame of mind guides him to guard a secret with consequences. Carl Baker is a talented and charming baseball player who has managed to keep his biggest secret from the public and his wife, Susan, a lawyer whose lust for life is only surpassed by her lust for love and acceptance. Alan Radcliff is a therapist who holds all secrets from those whose lives are steeped in triumphs and tragedies, sex and scandals, and betrayal and heartache.

In this compelling tale, several individuals caught up in money and power attempt to rise above their challenges during a time of change in America, only to be undermined by a waterfall of secrets.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Archway Publishing
• Release date: Dec 5, 2014
• ISBN: 9781480812444

Sylvia C. Stowers

Sylvia Stowers was once employed in the investment banking and building industry. Now retired from a second career in education, she resides in San Diego County. This is the second book in an intended trilogy.

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Copyright © 2014 Sylvia C. Stowers.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the publisher except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

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ISBN: 978-1-4808-1245-1 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-4808-1243-7 (hc)

ISBN: 978-1-4808-1244-4 (e)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2014921256

Archway Publishing rev. date: 12/5/2014

CONTENTS

About the Author

About the Book

Characters

Book One

Prologue

Eileen — Summer 1969

David—Summer 1969

Carl—Spring 1974

Eileen—Spring 1974

David—Spring 1974

Alan—Spring 1974

Eileen—Summer 1974

David—Fall 1974

Susan—Fall 1974

Carl—Fall 1974

Susan—Summer 1975

Eileen—Fall 1975

David—Fall 1975

Carl—Winter 1976

David—Spring 1977

Alan—Spring 1977

The Party—Spring 1977

Underneath—Summer 1977

Overseas—Fall 1977

Alan—Spring 1978

Carl and Susan—Summer 1978

Eileen—Summer 1978

Carl—Summer 1978

David—Summer 1978

Alan—Fall 1978

The Looking Glass

Epilogue

Songs of Shadows

FOR BRIDGET AND JULES

AND MY SISTER, CINDY, WHO HAS ALWAYS LOVED ME JUST AS I AM

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

I AM PART OF a musically talented, creative family. My mother, born nearly deaf, was a first-chair violinist; my sister, a trailblazing middle school music teacher; my oldest son, a visionary in building design; my second son, a pianist at heart; one nephew, a musical composer; another nephew, a creative film editor; and, last but not least, my college-bound niece, a blossoming artist with a brilliant mind and beautiful heart.

In writing this book, I want you, the reader, to gain a broad insight into each entire character. That is why I’ve chosen musical lyrics to accompany most chapters to set the stage. Different lyrics from different music genres offer a deeper understanding of each person in this story. I hope you will listen to the music to truly appreciate each character.

ABOUT THE BOOK

SHADOWS OF US IS the first of three projected works of fiction about a group of people caught up in the cultural changes in America from the sixties to the present. The still-unfolding metamorphosis in our society causes all of us to reflect on what is good and what can be strengthened.

Thirty years ago, I was employed in a fascinating and dizzying career of investment banking and building in San Diego County. Having worked and socialized within a culture of people with power and money and observing how big money was lost and gained, I know something about this industry. Before the economy turned sour, before real estate went south, before Ponzi schemes were discovered, I immersed myself in a world of financial ecstasy that was a more powerful aroma to my senses than any drug could have been. As a twentysomething, money was my aphrodisiac.

Thirty years ago, I authored a fiction manuscript regarding the aspects of this industry that was considered for publishing by a well-known agency in Hollywood. I’ve had a career both in finance and education that spans over forty years. Having come full circle—after retiring as a school counselor in a K–12 setting—I found my manuscript by accident, while cleaning out my closet. Looking through it, I decided on a rewrite so a new generation of readers could lift from its pages a history of sorts: what it was like to be on the cutting edge of newer technology. I want them to have a better understanding of the social footprints that made lasting impressions on American citizens and enjoy a novel of characters that colored a growing and important era of success and failure. I want my generation of readers to recall their experiences, their enduring passions, and their scars and triumphs, left behind in their memories only.

One thing is for sure: with age, I have better emotional vision, live more passionately, and expect the unexpected with an even sense of calm. The characters in my book are innocents, risk takers, liars, and thieves. Each one of them symbolizes what I’ve experienced and learned; they represent not only my particular industry, but all walks of life.

What I know is that although we may linger with shadows that prohibit us from being the best we can be, if we are brave enough to face and speak the truth, we can rid ourselves of the shadows and walk into the light.

Here’s to all you readers. Enjoy!

CHARACTERS

SUSAN —

A beautiful, young lawyer, struggling with her identity, who has moved to San Diego, seeking a new start.

JOSEPH —

Susan’s first husband.

EILEEN —

An ambitious clairvoyant who seeks personal and professional challenges.

SAMUEL —

A childhood friend of Eileen.

JOHN —

A coworker of Eileen.

DR. STYLES —

A professional and personal friend of Eileen.

JACQUELYN —

A widow, she is a locally known psychic in Phoenix, Arizona.

DAVID —

An investment banker, whose Vietnam past has hardened him, works secretly with a powerful partner, laundering money.

LORRAINE —

Well connected in proper social circles, she’s David’s wife.

LIVINGSTON —

The proprietor of a large and successful San Diego bank, and David’s older mentor.

COMMANDER SIMS —

A chaplain from the Vietnam War who has his own doubts about the war’s legitimacy.

CAROL —

A district Attorney for San Diego in her early forties who irritates David and occasionally sleeps with him.

CARL —

Suave, good-looking, and single, he plays baseball for the San Diego Padres. He is a master of secrets.

ALAN —

A counselor who is low-key, handsome, friendly, gay, and the keeper of all secrets.

BOOK ONE

PROLOGUE

THE MORNING WAS SAD, of little promise. In her bed, the woman lay still with beads of sweat dripping down her face. The night had almost been the end of her nightmare.

Once during the long darkness, she had awakened to find herself in a sterile space that looked vaguely like a hospital room. As an early autumn rain pounded the window, houses slept in darkness. And yet downtown the bright lights from the city’s harbor and the tourist section of Sea Port Village threw shadowy images onto the streets below. Susan noticed someone, perhaps a nurse, adjusting what seemed to be a tube connected to her arm. Through her hazy vision, she looked into the eyes of a troubled man, her husband, Carl.

Susan, honey? How soft and gentle her name sounded as he whispered it. Carl touched her forehead lightly with his fingers, wiping away the dampness. He looked every bit as miserable as she felt.

They won’t let me stay with you. Susan’s spirits were buoyed somewhat by Carl’s voice, but his expression conceded helplessness and defeat. Forcing a smile, Susan shivered. What is the matter with him? And what was the matter with me? He seemed to be badly frightened, and no man she had ever known was more cool and calm than Carl Baker.

There was no sound but the constant buzz from the machine behind her head that registered her breathing. Oh god, she thought.

Puzzled and a little more than disturbed, Susan turned her head as if to hide in the pillow. Her blond hair lay ragged and lifeless; her teeth chattered. She was cold.

Listen, Susan. I’ll be waiting outside your door. A strange coolness touched her cheek as Carl brushed it with a kiss. As he walked toward the door and turned to say good-bye, Susan knew she would remember the shocked and empty look on his face. The rain had slowed; she imagined a cold drizzle falling. He stared momentarily at the window as remnants of rain still held to the pavements of San Diego, and then he silently left.

We’re dreamers, she considered momentarily, both of us—unpractical, reserved, and believing we could make it work. Some minuscule cell in her brain ached, and Susan fell back to sleep.

Susan Baker did not speak often of her wealth or status to others. She preferred to think of herself as self-created, which in many ways she was. Her power did not come from silver spoons in the family. She had scrapped, suffered, and fought for what was rightfully hers. Her lust for life was surpassed only by her lust for love and acceptance.

She and Carl were known for throwing parties of parties to accommodate the rich, all cunningly competing for attention. This night, however, was anything but a party. The ingeniously woven narrative of her life had unraveled. The truth? She was done. Done with it all and disgusted with what she had become. She simply didn’t care anymore. Her unbridled investing, her excessive confidence, and her carefully scripted professional life had plunged her into a daring adventure. But she had panicked when she realized had gone too deep. She was done, and she could care less.

Susan’s last, fuzzy thoughts of discomfort disappeared into the inviting darkness that was consuming her. Through half-drugged eyes, she thought she saw a figure pushing her in her bed down a well-lit corridor. She blinked, her head fell back on a pillow, and she slept. Susan had no idea she was being transferred to an operating room.

Well, you don’t know what we can find.

Why don’t you come with me, little girl,

On a magic carpet ride.

Steppenwolf

Magic Carpet Ride

EILEEN — SUMMER 1969

THE CAR RADIO HUMMED softly as the recent college graduate drove under the burning Arizona sun. In two more hours, she would reach the California border.

Eileen Emerson sat behind the wheel of a new 1969 Ford Torino, chosen from the car showroom because it was different, like her. She loved the red, two-door hardback with the sloped, long roofline that extended to the edge of the trunk lid. If she wanted, she could reach 120 miles an hour on the desert road, but she was content to speed at a conventional seventy. This was an exciting new car, just as her life was beginning to be. This car had taken all her savings, but she was proud of it. So far, it had proven to be a good vehicle, handling itself well in the blistering heat.

Eileen was a small, slender woman who, at twenty-three, still wore the look of a teenager. She was also the type of person who, when introduced to others, left little impression. It wasn’t that she lacked looks; her presence remained a mystery to others because she clung to every word without any indication in her eyes of what she was thinking. As a child, she had overcome a lack of confidence with a steely will and a fight to conquer her own perceived deficiencies through her love of intrigue and her energetic dabbling in what she considered normal.

Eileen embraced her abilities to see things not apparent to others, like visions of events and visual impressions of a person. This included an ability to see variations of colors in others. Traces of glowing lights in the air or floating around people would pop up unexpectedly, day or night. Light colors represented healthy energy; dark colors indicated a need for physical or mental replenishment, or even oncoming death.

She took pride in herself as an adventuress and a dominant woman who more than held her own in a world of men. Her taste, her authentic glamour despite her lack of conventional beauty, and her love for the unknowns of the world were the secrets that made Eileen.

Her inner being radiated an electric life of its own when she responded to others. Her dark-brown eyes sparkled when catching those nearby with a penetrating glance. At times, her long, auburn hair would partially cover her face. With an almost desperate gesture, she’d reach up and move the offending hair to clear her view. She always wanted—no, lived—to see others as only she could.

Because she had been a quiet, intense child who did not consider herself attractive, Eileen had enjoyed alone time, sometimes avoiding other children. Her unusual behaviors cautioned a few to keep their distance; her stares made them feel uncomfortable. Eileen’s round, dark eyes revealed little as she took notes in her head.

Occasionally breaking from her private isolation, Eileen would enter the family kitchen after playing jacks by herself outside and chat with her mother about her day. Her frank attitude astonished her mother, and she convinced her parents that she could