Ayana

By Geetha Krishnan

A love that spans lifetimes...

When dreams of a previous life she cannot make sense of starts troubling her, Sita is determined to ignore them. Till the evil that was after her is before her, and she learns that nothing will prevent Ravana from getting what he wants, and now, he wants her, regardless of her being married to Rama.  

In the island fortress of Lanka, with both mind and body worn down with her captivity, her only hope of rescue lies in the love and tenacity of Rama. But Lanka is impregnable, secured by more than an asura army, and an ocean stands between Rama and her prison.

Will she be able to escape her prison or would Rama's arrival be too late?

• Language: English
• Publisher: Geetha Krishnan
• Release date: Dec 15, 2021
• ISBN: 9798201163600

Geetha Krishnan

Geetha Krishnan is an author of books derived from the rich and vast spectrum of Indian mythology. A practising Hindu, their books show their deep knowledge of the religion and customs of ancient India. Their books have won many accolades and have been universally praised for the twists they bring to their retellings. Their books Ayana and Pradyutita have made it to the semi finals of SPFBO 2019 and 2020 respectively, and their short story, The Forgotten Son has won an Honourable Mention in The Writers of the Future Contest. Durga was the Runner up of the Rev PIt 2020. 

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First published by Geetha Krishnan 2021

Copyright © 2021 by Geetha Krishnan

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, digital, mechanical, photocopying, recording, scanning, or otherwise without written permission from the publisher. It is illegal to copy this book, post it to a website, or distribute it by any other means without permission.

This novel is entirely a work of fiction. The names, characters and incidents portrayed in it are the work of the author’s imagination. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events or localities is entirely coincidental.

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TABLE OF CONTENTS

PART ONE

ONE

TWO

THREE

FOUR

FIVE

SIX

PART TWO

SEVEN

EIGHT

NINE

TEN

ELEVEN

TWELVE

THIRTEEN

PART THREE

FOURTEEN

FIFTEEN

SIXTEEN

SEVENTEEN

EIGHTEEN

NINETEEN

TWENTY

TWENTY ONE

TWENTY TWO

TWENTY THREE

TWENTY FOUR

TWENTY FIVE

TWENTY SIX

TWENTY SEVEN

TWENTY EIGHT

TWENTY NINE

THIRTY

THIRTY ONE

THIRTY TWO

THIRTY THREE

PART FOUR

THIRTY FOUR

THIRTY FIVE

THIRTY SIX

THIRTY SEVEN

THIRTY EIGHT

THIRTY NINE

FORTY

FORTY ONE

FORTY TWO

FORTY THREE

FORTY FOUR

FORTY FIVE

FORTY SIX

PART FIVE

FORTY SEVEN

FORTY EIGHT

FORTY NINE

FIFTY

FIFTY ONE

FIFTY TWO

FIFTY THREE

FIFTY FOUR

FIFTY FIVE

FIFTY SIX

FIFTY SEVEN

FIFTY EIGHT

FIFTY NINE

SIXTY

SIXTY ONE

SIXTY TWO

SIXTY THREE

SIXTY FOUR

SIXTY FIVE

SIXTY SIX

PART SIX

SIXTY SEVEN

SIXTY EIGHT

SIXTY NINE

SEVENTY

SEVENTY ONE

SEVENTY TWO

SEVENTY THREE

SEVENTY FOUR

SEVENTY FIVE

SEVENTY SIX

SEVENTY SEVEN

SEVENTY EIGHT

SEVENTY NINE

EIGHTY

EIGHTY ONE

EIGHTY TWO

PART SEVEN

EIGHTY THREE

EIGHTY FOUR

EIGHTY FIVE

EIGHTY SIX

EIGHTY SEVEN

EIGHTY EIGHT

EIGHTY NINE

PART EIGHT

NINETY

NINETY ONE

NINETY TWO

NINETY THREE

EPILOGUE

GLOSSARY OF TERMS

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FLAMES LEAPT UP OUT OF THE EARTH, and Ravana jumped back, unable to do anything but watch as they consumed Vedavati. The shock kept him paralysed. He had never expected her to actually carry out her threat of immolating herself. And all because he had caught her by the hand!

Ravana felt a constriction in his chest. Feelings he had never experienced before consumed him. Anger he knew, humiliation too, despite everything; rejection might have been rare, but it wasn’t unfamiliar. What was new, what was completely strange was the tightness in his chest, the prickle of tears in his eyes, the desire to scream, and not in rage. It surprised him. Never had he grieved so. Not for anyone had he suffered like this. And now, for this woman he had seen for the first time on this day, he mourned. She was so vibrant, full of life, passion, fury, and now she was no more. How futile her death was! No matter how he looked at it, he could not see the sense behind it.

Her curse, he did not worry about. He had never had to force a woman before; they were all too willing. That might sound arrogant, but that had been his experience so far. Perhaps that was why he did not take Vedavati seriously when she begged him to let go of her hand. He couldn’t believe that any woman could be this particular. She had felt so smirched by his very touch that she had chosen to die rather than live after that. Even now, he found it incredible, but the proof was in front of his eyes, the flames rising higher and higher, the heat so intense, that he had to take a few more steps back and shield his eyes.

The fire died out, just as suddenly as it had sprung up, leaving behind a heap of ashes. That was all that remained of a strong, beautiful woman. Someone who had been living and breathing just moments ago, who had challenged him, made him question himself. She had been so powerful spiritually that she could call forth Agni himself to consume her to ashes at the touch of a hand that was repellent to her.

Anger stirred within him at the memory of her words. Perhaps it was better that she chose to end her life, especially since she was saving herself for that nursemaid of the devas. The thought of Vishnu drove away every other thought, leaving only a roiling fury in their stead. What a waste for a woman like her to want that fellow for a husband! His trying to convince her of the utter worthlessness of Vishnu had only made her even more wrathful. Truth be told, he might have forced her, if she had not won her freedom in such a drastic way, just for the reason that she wanted Vishnu.

He gritted his teeth. Vishnu! The trickster who had always taken pleasure to foil all his Asura ancestors’ plans for world domination. So many great Asuras who had been slain by him just for the fact that they were born in the wrong clan. Fury rose in him again, hot, boiling and uncontrollable. And how had he even defeated them? Not in battle, as might have been justifiable. No, it was only through tricks and his greater power as one of the Trimurti. What chance would any Asura have against the Great Preserver, in any battle? Yet, had Vishnu vanquished them in battle, Ravana might not have loathed him so much. Instead, he had chosen to treat them as less than deserving of even that respect!

And all for what? So the devas could lead their cosseted lives? How many times had they been defeated in battle by the Asuras! And every time they would run to their nursemaid in Vaikunta, begging for his help, and the so-called Preserver of Dharma would immediately rush forth to help those hapless idiots.

Dharma! What dharma was it that they had been denied their rightful share of Amrit after they had toiled so hard along with the devas for its retrieval from the ocean? What dharma was it that tricked Bali, his ancestor? Wasn’t he a just king? The most righteous of all kings? Dharma! The only dharma Vishnu knew was to keep the devas safe and in comfort with the Asuras grovelling at their feet.

All that would end now. Vishnu’s tricks weren’t going to work on him or his people again. They had already established their stronghold in Lanka. His son had defeated those worthless devas in battle. He was invincible. And Lord Brahma’s and Lord Siva’s boons had made him all but invulnerable. Though he couldn’t be immortal, this was the next best thing. Not even Vishnu could touch him now.

Lord Siva now. Admiration replaced Ravana’s rage. That was a God worth worshipping! He played no favourites and he took care of his devotees, and he didn’t interfere in things that weren’t his concern. He didn’t play tricks to favour the devas! Not like that Vishnu.

If Vedavati had not spoken Vishnu’s name, would he have let her go? Anger was one reason why he had refused, but was that the only reason? He had desired her, no question about that. She was one of the most beautiful women he had seen, and he had wanted to make her his. He would even have married her if that was what it took. What was one more wife? Yet, all she could think of was Vishnu, and that had made him obdurate. Still, he was honest enough to admit that he wouldn’t have let her go even if she had never spoken the God’s name.

A slight breeze started, stirring up the ashes, swirling them up. Ravana once again felt that tightness in his chest. Soon, the wind would blow the ashes away, and there would remain no sign that Vedavati ever was, that she had lived, breathed, prayed for Vishnu to become her husband, and had ended her life to avoid being soiled by Ravana’s touch. No remnant would be there of her spirit, her resilience, or her zeal. That was what death did, after all. What a waste!

A twinge of pain from his right hand made him stare down. Huh. There was a burn mark on his palm, and the hairs on his arm were singed. How strange that he had felt nothing till no! He flexed his fingers, ignoring the pain. It was not the worst injury he had taken after all. His magic could easily heal his flesh. Yet, he hesitated. This was the hand that had been holding her when she had called forth the fire to consume her; a reminder of Vedavati’s life, and his own actions.

His chest hurt, and he lifted his injured hand to rub it. It was no use, of course. Whatever he was feeling, it was not physical. He could not understand it. Why would he feel thus? Never had he allowed himself to love anyone to the point life would be impossible without that one. It wasn’t that he didn’t love or care. He cared for his wives, his children and his siblings. He was certain that losing any of them would hurt, but would it hurt like this? He didn’t think so. After all, it could be argued that he had already lost Kumbhakarna. His bhrata stayed asleep for all time except for the one day in a year that he woke. That had hurt, the trickery of the devas that had caused it, not having him there by his side as he built up Lanka, created a haven for his people, and yet it was not like this.

What was this? Why did this woman cause this? She was just one of the myriad women he had desired. That was all.

Or was it?

She was certainly not ordinary. Her sacrifice might have been foolish, but the will that carried it out was exceptional. He had never been exposed to this kind of purity or steadfast resolution. Even the way she stayed firmly devoted to Vishnu was remarkable.

What a queen she would have made!

Never stopping to consider, Ravana gathered up the ashes in his uttariya. He would not consign her to the winds. He was not prepared to let go of her and her memories. He would keep her ashes, keep them safe in Lanka. He wanted to remember that he had once been touched by someone who was so pure, so innocent and yet so powerful. Even as he berated her stupidity and her choices, he didn’t want to forget her. Inexplicably, the dead Vedavati had come to mean more to him than all the living women in his life.

THIS IS THE SECOND HURRICANE in the past one month, the aged Amatya spoke, his brow furrowed in worry.

How many dead? Enquired Ravana.

More than a hundred, replied Suka. He drew a deep breath and plunged right in, brave as always. My Lord, Lanka had never, in all her history, been attacked by hurricanes. No natural calamities had ever plagued us. But for the past one month, in fact ever since . . . His voice trailed off at the quelling look directed at him by his King.

What is it that you wish to say? Ravana asked, his tone icy. He kept himself relaxed, but it took effort.

The minister gulped. He was not a coward,—Ravana had to grant him that—but he had caused stronger hearts than Suka’s to quail in fear before him. Yet, Suka was actuated by devotion to his duty as well as concern for their people. Ravana knew he wouldn’t be silenced by angry glances or cold words. Not when he believed he had to speak in order to protect their people.

My Lord, Suka spoke, his voice growing stronger. All these calamities have started befalling us ever since you brought those cursed ashes-

Enough! Ravana’s voice was deathly quiet, but there was no mistaking his anger.

But my Lord-

I said, enough! Suka, spoke Ravana, shame adding to his fury. How dare you question my actions! Should I order that you be put to death for your disloyalty?

Bhrata! Exclaimed Vibhishana, who had been silent till then. Is this worthy of you, to threaten him for doing his duty? His words were spoken out of concern for our people and not for any selfish motives. How can you speak to him like this?

That is my privilege, said Ravana, his voice colder now. He hated Vibhishana’s sanctimonious nature. I do believe that I am the King of this island. He turned to Suka. You may leave now.

The minister shot a glance at Vibhishana, helplessness mingled with apology, as he bowed and left.

Ravana, alone with his bhrata, was silent. Vibhishana might have been right, but that did not improve his temper. Regret mingled with shame fought with his anger and obduracy. He should not have threatened his minister. The old fool was only doing what he considered his duty. The shame made him scowl at his bhrata. Vibhishana always had that effect on him.

I am sorry, bhrata, said Vibhishana. I should not have questioned your authority in front of Suka. It was wrong of me.

Yes, it was, said Ravana, even more upset now. How could he stay angry if Vibhishana apologised? I do not like my decisions being questioned by anyone, not even you.

Don’t you mean especially by me? Asked Vibhishana.

Ravana was torn between irritation, and amusement. At times he nearly hated this bhrata of his. Vibhishana knew him so well. He knew that Ravana did not like him very much most of the time; that he actively disliked him sometimes and really hated him at others. Yet, Vibhishana persisted in trying to make a better Asura out of him. What Ravana could never forgive perhaps, was that he still continued to care for him. It was as if Vibhishana was going out of his way to make him feel guilty when he kept on loving him in spite of Ravana’s open dislike for him.

Yes, I do mean that, Ravana said, seeing his bhrata wince slightly at his brutal admission. He ignored the slight twinge of shame he felt. It was petty, perhaps, but his anger needed an outlet.

Even then, my concern for you and for Lanka-

Spare me the sermon, Ravana said. If you are going to tell me that the casket containing the ashes I brought is responsible for all the calamities that have come upon us, spare your breath. I do not believe in superstition, and I will not get rid of it.

Then you are condemning your people and your kingdom, said Vibhishana, his voice steady, and his arms open in a gesture of surrender.

Ravana glared at his bhrata. Vibhishana met his eyes quite calmly. That was another thing that Ravana disliked about his bhrata. Vibhishana was not even remotely afraid of him. Not that he had any reason to. Whatever he was, Ravana would never hurt his own bhrata. Yet, Vibhishana didn’t know that, and still, he wasn’t scared of his bhrata’s anger.

One day, Ravana growled, you’ll push me too far.

And what would you do then? Queried his bhrata, still unruffled. Would you have me put to death?

I think I’ll reserve that pleasure for myself. Ravana had the satisfaction of seeing the flash of pain in his bhrata’s eyes.

Vibhishana dropped his gaze and said quietly, Bhrata, I have consulted our priests and astrologers, and they all say that that casket is the reason for the catastrophes that have fallen on us.

And you think that your priests and astrologers are able to know better than I? That their knowledge of the planets and stars and omens is greater than mine? Ravana chose not to hide the contempt in his words.

No, bhrata. Vibhishana said, sounding resigned now. But you have turned your face away from the truth. You have chosen to blind yourself and are wilfully ignoring what’s staring at you in the face! There was emotion in Vibhishana’s voice at the last. Why did his bhrata get so impassioned about things that did not affect him directly? Ravana, bhrata, pleaded Vibhishana. Get rid of that casket and the accursed ashes inside it! Surely whoever it was, that person is not important enough to sacrifice your entire people?

Yes, she is, replied Ravana, interrupting his bhrata, the words slipping out, without conscious thought.

She? Vibhishana was startled, but just for an instant. It doesn’t matter. All that matters is that she is destroying Lanka. We’ve had hurricanes, firestorms, earthquakes and all of them in the past one month since you brought those ashes here and installed them in our sanctum! Lanka had never been subject to any calamities before. Keeping those ashes here have invited the wrath of the elements! They’ll destroy our nation and our people if you do not get rid of them!

Lanka is not my entire dominion, snarled Ravana, clenching his fists. My empire extends far beyond the oceans that surround Lanka.

Yes, but none of those places are peopled by our race. Will you condemn our race to extinction for the sake of some – ashes?

No one is compelling them to stay in Lanka, said Ravana, keeping his voice down and steady. It may be his throne room, and they may be alone, but he knew better than to think that meant they had privacy. If they don’t like the presence of those ashes, they may leave. Settle elsewhere in my empire.

They will not be welcomed in the lands of the humans. Vibhishana expostulated. They feel safe here. You know this too, bhrata.

Those humans can be got rid of.

You will exterminate an entire race, just to keep those ashes? Exclaimed Vibhishana, anger and disbelief in his voice. Even you can’t be that callous, that cruel! He shook his head. Whose ashes are those? Why are they so important? At least tell me that!

For a moment, Ravana considered telling Vibhishana about Vedavati. He had no doubts that his bhrata would understand, but that would not change anything. Vibhishana would still insist that he get rid of her ashes and probably he would tell him that it was his fault that she was dead anyway.

No. I will not tell him. I will not tell anyone. And I will not throw away that casket either.

I am not answerable to you or to anyone else, said Ravana, hardening his resolve. I am King and my word is Law. That casket and its contents will stay in Lanka. Those who do not like it may leave. And that includes you.

Vibhishana said nothing for a few moments. Then he spoke and his voice was calm, quiet. I know you do not like me, that you even hate me at times, but I love you all the same. I’ve always loved you, bhrata, and if I say things that are not to your liking, it’s only because I care too much for you. I still believe that that casket must be got rid of, but if you refuse, that’s your privilege. But I will not leave you to save myself. I will not leave you, period.

Ravana sighed. He should have known that he would not be rid of the pest so easily. He shook his head and said, I will not get rid of that casket, so don’t ask me again.

I asked only out of concern for our people, Vibhishana said, so earnest. It is not for me to tell you this, but you are their King. They should come first with you.

And what about you? Who comes first with you?

Vibhishana shrugged. You should know by now. You have raised hell often enough because of that.

Vishnu? Exclaimed Ravana. You still worship that— he controlled himself. I don’t know why I don’t follow our revered ancestor Hiranyakashipu’s example and ban his worship!

Maybe because the fate that befell him is deterrent enough?

Ravana glared at his bhrata again. I don’t know how you can worship someone who has killed so many of our revered ancestors!

Tripura fell from the sky, did they? Taraka just dropped dead, did he?

That was not my Lord Siva’s doing! He is not responsible for his son’s actions! And he defeated Tripura in battle. He did not trick them!

Ravana paused. What the hell am I doing? Did I just- He shook his head. How did we get here?

Because I said I loved Lord Vishnu better than you, said Vibhishana, a smile hovering about his mouth.

Ravana felt an answering smile tug at his mouth. He almost liked his bhrata at that moment. He did like Vibhishana when he stopped trying to be his conscience. But unfortunately, Vibhishana seemed to revel in that role. Or maybe fortunately. After all, he was a devotee of Vishnu whom Ravana hated. To have cared for one devotee of Vishnu was bad enough, but to care for two- that would be unthinkable, especially since Vibhishana was still alive. A faint smile curved his mouth. It would have been nice to have Vibhishana’s ashes in a casket too, but then, one cannot have everything.

RAVANA SAW THE PORTENTS. They were not good. Lanka was still in the grip of the hail storm. It had started the previous evening and had not abated. Even here, inside his room, away from the balcony and the windows, the fury of nature could be felt.

Three months, Ravana realised. For three months now, his Kingdom had been suffering one natural disaster after another. He knew why. He knew the omens. He had to get rid of her ashes.

Yet, he hesitated. How could he do it just like that? How could he simply dump her ashes in the ocean? Or scatter them to the winds? How could he consign her remains to the elements as if it meant nothing? How could he just let her go?

True, she had never been his, and she had made it abundantly clear who her heart belonged to. Somehow, that only made it harder for him to let go of her. In life, she had belonged to Vishnu. But in death, she would be his. He would possess at least her ashes. He