Thundrhed!
By Damon Wolfe
()
About this ebook
Heroic fantasy adventure. Have fun with it.
Thundrhed is rash, not stupid. Uneducated, yes, impulsive, obstinate and maybe a little bit mad, but how much trouble can a barbarian with a big sword really get into, given an eye for mischief, a short attention span and an unwelcome interest in other peoples' guarded treasure? In another age he would have been a rock star armed with an axe instead of a sword, still shirtless and in the same leather pants. Trouble either way.
Herein lies the tale of a vikingish berserkr who sells his land in order to travel, and so journeys to the big city to unload the last of his livestock.
A hayseed in the city, he inevitably goes on a bender. Tavern brawls follow, and a tasteful bordello, close shaves with a monstrous zombie, a leper and a sorcerer, and a pivotal encounter with a mystical weirdo who tells him of a secret treasure hoard in which he will find the key to his destiny. Somehow, he lives through the night.
Post epic hangover, he makes his way to Soenso's Rare Goods and Interesting Clutter Emporium to speak with Ōle, a purveyor of trinkets and exposition. From Ōle he learns the details of the treasure hidden beneath the Dragon Throne across the sea.
Journey with Thundrhed as he crosses the seas to the land of sinister foreigners in his quest for gold, lush wenches, middling infamy and rare artefacts to admire once, then throw in a crate with all the other priceless crap looted in his travels. Gasp in horror as he cobbles together a slipshod plan to smuggle himself into the Forbidden Temple. Shake your head in wonder as he sets out to interrupt a ritual sacrifice, defeat the guards, fight off the monsters and discover the treasure chamber.
Will he loot the treasure and leg it, two steps in front of the authorities and an angered greater weregoat and ride hell-for-leather to board a ship and escape, intact and wealthy? If so, fireworks and fanfare, drinks on Thundrhed. If not, we'll have a hundred page description of his funeral arrangements. What more could you want? Maybe dragons. Just a couple of little ones for flavour. And a damsel in distress.
THUNDRHED! is a story for a lazy afternoon when you'd rather let someone else do the heavy lifting. It's a book. Read it.
'laugh out loud until I'm crying funny.' - Kelly, 1morechap.blogspot.com
'Put this author on your must read list – you'll thank me later. Great read!' - Diana, goodreads.com
Damon Wolfe's THUNDRHED! is the rarest kind of quick-witted romp – Rich Follett readersfavorite.com
Damon Wolfe
Damon Wolfe is a figment of his own imagination. He writes stories for people to read because he thought that would be a good thing to do. He is the author of THUNDRHED!, but not the author of Tanglewood. That’s a different guy. When not doing mundane things that you don’t care about, he divides his time between adventurous barbarians, pirates, dragons, monsters, space ships and existential crises, little of which he takes seriously. He has no presence on social media because he doesn’t want one, while casually detesting humanity’s addiction to mobile phones. Nor does he maintain a blog, website or agent, or carefully developed opinions about such things. You might as well address any letters to the man in the moon. He also grows strawberries and has trouble with tiny ants eating holes in them. Do authors always refer to themselves in the third person when penning theses little bios, or does someone else write them? Maybe he should have pursued traditional publishing. Damon Wolfe’s next book will likely be a novella-length piece entitled PIRATE SCUM!, but that’s been on a back burner for twenty-five years, so don’t hold your breath.
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