Giving Back: Memories, Reflections, and Lessons Learned

By Edward A. Joseph

Giving Back is an inspirational book of 50 short articles by the author, the majority of which have been previously published. This collection of the author's personal experiences is masterfully crafted to entertain, offer advice, and inspire readers. A few of the selections will bring a tear, while others a smile. Giving Back will appeal to many readers, but especially those 50-years old and older who are looking for informative, engaging, and entertaining stories.

• Language: English
• Publisher: BookBaby
• Release date: Aug 3, 2021
• ISBN: 9781098385750

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Copyright © 2021 Edward A. Joseph

All rights reserved. This book or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the publisher except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.

ISBN (Print): 978-1-09838-574-3

ISBN (eBook): 978-1-09838-575-0

Contents

INTRODUCTION

ACKNOWLEDGEMENT

NOSTALGIA

A DAUGHTER MOVES BACK HOME

A HALLOWEEN EXPERIMENT

CADDY MEMORIES

DAD’S MAGICAL BRACELET

DEN MOTHER LOVE

LESSONS FOR LIVING FROM A CARNIVAL DAD

THAT UNFORGETTABLE FIRST PAYDAY

THE DAY MY DAD’S PANTS CAUGHT ON FIRE

WHAT ARE THE ODDS?

REFLECTIONS

A MESSAGE OF HOPE FROM THE DRAGON LADY

A ROLL OF TRAGEDY

A VISIT FROM MOM

A YOUNG BOY’S TERROR: DECEMBER 7, 1941

DEALING WITH DIMINISHED LIFE ENERGY

LIFE LESSONS AT THE SENIOR GAMES

MEMORIES: A HAPPINESS TOOL

MY BRIEF CAREER AS A CAR SALESMAN

REMEMBERING THE WORDS OF A FALLEN MARINE

STAYING ON THE SUNNY SIDE OF LIFE

THANKSGIVING ANGEL

THE BEST SERMON I EVER HEARD

THE INVASION OF THE MIND SNATCHERS

THE WINTER SOLSTICE: SPRING IS COMING!

ADVICE AND MORE

COUCH POTATOES NEED ‘EXERCISE CARROTS’

JIGSAW PUZZLES, PENGUIN MADNESS, AND FUN

LEARNING A FOREIGN LANGUAGE AT 75

MY ‘DO NOT RETELL’ LIST

‘PHISHING’ PAIN

SPENDING LIFE ENERGY

TEN CUPS OF COFFEE: SMALL CHOICES FOR A HAPPIER LIFE

THE AARP ONLINE DRIVER SAFETY COURSE

THE BATTLE AGAINST LITTERBUGS CAN BE FOUGHT ONE PIECE OF TRASH AT A TIME

THINKING 48

TRANSITIONING INTO RETIREMENT

YOU CAN’T BEAT BOWLING FOR MEETING PEOPLE

WHAT IF? DRIVING TO SAVE A LIFE

HEALTH

AEROBIC EXERCISE FOR A HEALTHIER BRAIN

DON’T SKIP THE OPHTHALMOLOGIST

HEY, GUYS, HAVE THAT THYROID TESTED

HEY, GUYS, DOING KEGELS CAN HELP CONTROL AN OVERACTIVE BLADDER

THE AUTHOR, WHO IS A BIG CHICKEN, TAKES A LOOK INSIDE HIS COLON

TRAVEL

HILDENE: ROBERT LINCOLN’S MAGNIFICENT VERMONT ESTATE

THE CRAZY HORSE MEMORIAL: A MONUMENTAL DREAM

TWO THOUSAND MILES FOR A PIECE OF PIE

DIDN’T MAKE THE CUT

A SUPERMARKET REVELATION

CURIOUS MINDS AND NUDE BOWLING

FOURTH OF JULY MEMORIES

MIRACLE AT EBBETS FIELD, MAY 21, 1952

THANK YOU FOR YOUR SERVICE

WHAT CAN WE LEARN FROM A KILLER COMET?

FINAL NOTE

For Susan, my spouse, companion,

and friend for over 50 years

If stories come to you, care for them. And learn to give them away where they are needed.

Barry Lopez, Crow and Weasel

INTRODUCTION

The four-part Hindu scheme of life-long development is the basis for one of the chapters of William Bridge’s Transitions: Making Sense of Life’s Changes . In this chapter, Bridges makes the point that in the final phase of life one manifests and offers back to others what one has learned….

Since retiring from the Yonkers school system, where I was a teacher and school administrator, I have been sharing my life experiences, and what I have learned from them, through my writing.

Almost all of the stories and essays in this book have been previously published, many of them more than once. At the end of each story or essay, I note who published the piece. Senior Wire, a service for senior newspapers, marketed the majority of them. When a piece was published more than once, I only list one source, generally the most significant.

I have also included a Didn’t Make the Cut section, pieces that didn’t find a home, perhaps for obvious reasons, e.g., Curious Minds and Nude Bowling. Nevertheless, this section is one of my favorites.

Almost all the stories and essays can be read in five minutes or less as I have tried to follow the crime writer Elmore Leonard’s advice to cut out all the boring parts.

In preparing the articles for republication, I made small changes for clarity or accuracy, although I did not change date or time references. Information in some of the health and travel articles has changed, and when this is so, I note this at the end of the article.

Yonkers, New York

June 5, 2021

ACKNOWLEDGEMENT

I am indebted to the editors who accepted my work and improved it, especially Allison St. Claire of Senior Wire.

June 2021

Edward A. Joseph

New York

NOSTALGIA

There are a few moments in your life when you are truly and completely happy, and you remember to give thanks. Even as it happens you are nostalgic for the moment, you are tucking it away in your scrapbook.

—David Benioff, When the Nines Roll Over and Other Stories

A DAUGHTER MOVES BACK HOME

It was late October when Amy arrived after driving across the United States. Almost immediately, we got into a conflict over some minor problem. I became worried that I might not be able to handle living with her.

D ad, I am coming back, these five words changed my world.

My daughter, Amy, had left home seven years before to live in San Francisco shortly after her brother Matthew’s death. Over the years, we had talked on the phone, written letters, and spent time together during her infrequent trips back East. Whenever she came home, however, there was always a tension between us. Because of my work, I had been under a great deal of pressure when she was growing up, and I would occasionally pop my cork. Amy was a little afraid of me.

It was late October when Amy arrived after driving across the United States. Almost immediately, we got into a conflict over some minor problem. I became worried that I might not be able to handle living with her. I had accepted an early retirement incentive and would be home a great deal. Amy would also be there working as a freelance writer for a publishing company in California.

When I retired from my job as a teacher and an administrator in an urban school system, I decided to write a book about my experiences. I had finished a number of drafts before Amy arrived, but I knew the manuscript needed a great deal of editing. Amy agreed to help me, and we set up a weekly meeting in which we went over her suggested changes.

It was rough for me in the beginning, because it was hard to accept that my masterpiece was far from perfect and that it needed extensive structural changes. Amy was gentle and supportive as we worked together. Week after week she skillfully helped me to improve my work. I was unsure of my writing skills in the beginning, but she was a wonderful teacher and mentor.

We met every Tuesday at eleven o’clock in the kitchen. Uh, oh, I see a lot of purple, I would say as I looked at my inverted manuscript from the other side of the table (Amy used a pen with purple ink to make her edits).

Dad, you can’t just tell people what happened. You have to show them. Put more of you in your work, she said. Most readers want to know more about the people in a situation rather than the event itself. Don’t hold back. You need to use more dialogue. Your work is improving, but I am raising the bar.

My spine tingled whenever she would say, You nailed this section. I also noticed, as time went by, that we started to talk about many things besides the manuscript.

She shared the pain of coping with her brother’s death and her battles with alcohol and depression. Through my writing, she began to understand why I was under so much strain when she was little. I also talked about my struggles with Matthew’s death. I cried a number of times at these meetings. Many of our sessions ended with a hug.

As we got closer to the end of the editing process, Amy said to me one morning, Your book has saved my life. I was beginning to wonder if anything was worthwhile. Using my skills to help you with your manuscript has been my anchor over the last six months. Talk about crying.

It was awhile before words came. Amy, you have enriched my life, I answered. You have inspired me with a great love of writing, and an even greater love of a wonderful human being, and fantastic editor, who just happens to be my daughter.

Two years before, fear invaded me as I was deciding whether to take the early retirement incentive. Financially, I knew it would be a stretch. I took a long weekend in the mountains to make my decision. As I walked along a beautiful trail with large, powerful-looking trees, I thought of Robert Frost’s words in "The Road Not Taken": I shall be telling this with a sigh somewhere ages and ages hence: two roads diverged in a wood, and I took the one less traveled by, and that has made all the difference.

Over the first hill, I met my daughter.

Chicken Soup for the Soul: All in the Family

Note: The manuscript Amy and I were working on, The Loneliness of the Long-Distance Teacher, is at Google Play Books.

A HALLOWEEN EXPERIMENT

The denouement for my dad’s Halloween experiment is not encouraging for the future of the human family. On the other hand, entrapment might be the verdict of any fair-minded jury for what happened.

My dad loved kids and people watching in general. Children, as well as the vagaries of human behavior, fascinated him. I think these were the reasons, as well as his quirky sense of humor, for the sound system he set up one Halloween.

His plan was simple, yet ingenious,