Light The Way

By Natalie Farrell

Light The Way is a powerful companion for modern-day change makers who are ready to go all-in and activate the power of their intuitive voice.

What would happen if you could take off your shoes and dance with life for a while?

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• Language: English
• Publisher: The Unbound Press
• Release date: Sep 16, 2021
• ISBN: 9781913590284

Book preview

No More Numbing Down

No one else could make me happy. Only I could be responsible for that.

When I got to the end of writing this book, the quote they told me not to do it, so I did it anyway! landed. It landed exactly at the right time whilst driving home from the gym. I knew there and then that this one sentence summarised my approach to life. 

When I look back at my timeline, I realise that I have always adopted the go all in, unconventional attitude to life. Dedicating my heart to each project, business, audition, friend, relationship that I was honoured to be part of. Rarely did I question what would happen, I just did it anyway, even when people told me not to. I held trust in my heart and had a go. I think this is what makes life so exciting. 

So, I have done the same in writing this book. Gone all in. I know you’ll believe me when I say it is from my heart that I have written every word to your heart, darling one. The past 13 years have been a magnificent mix of fuck-ups and celebrations for me and the by-product is one heck of a reclamation story.  

It is my absolute pleasure to be here with you from the other side as a soul hustler who shakes life to its core. It is beyond exciting to be sharing perspectives on how you too can light the way and adopt the soul-led approach to life. Learn from your mistakes, they said – so I made lots and lots and I welcomed them all in: shiny, dirty, dull, exuberant, as they were all parts of me wanting to be recognised. 

So welcome to you, all parts of you, welcome to your very own out of the ordinary Soul Revolution story. 

Perhaps you are a lost soul? A magnetic soul? A free soul? A wounded soul? A fiery soul? 

Or perhaps you don’t even know who you are anymore? Maybe you feel detached, isolated from the essence of the physical form you were born into here on Planet Earth. Or perhaps like me, you are a soul hustler, a changemaker; sitting on the guidelines, stuck in limbo-land knowing you want something else but have no clue on how to get it? 

Your intuition bought you here. 

Whatever type of soul you are, you have come onto this planet at the same time as me. A rush of symbiotic joy is flooding my veins right now! You have landed here in this space so I can light the way for you to unearth your truth and unleash your soul’s desires. 

You are hungry, right? 

For new information, new ways, new connections, new collaborations. I believe it’s this hunger that has led our paths to cross. And the hunger inside of you is about to activate another reason for our paths crossing; a reason that is of the highest purpose. 

Your Soul’s Purpose. 

We are meeting now at this exact moment in time so that your soul’s purpose can be reawoken, realigned and reactivated. We are going to reel in all the fragmented, lost parts of your soul and bring them back into alignment so you can begin to become a co-creator, moving with life rather than opposing life. 

I was most certainly a lost and confused soul for the greatest part of my twenties. I felt totally and utterly disconnected from myself. At points, I even experienced deep hatred towards myself.  

From the ages of 20 to 24, I was training to be an opera singer at The Royal Northern College of Music in Manchester, England. I felt so much pressure to fit in and be accepted that I began to sacrifice my body’s essential needs. I abused myself by starving myself. 

I deprived my body of food and nourishment so I could stand out and be beautiful. I gave my energy to everything and everyone else but me. Four years later and two stone lighter when I left college this internal war continued. Who am I kidding? 

Fact: It got worse. 

Rejection after rejection from casting directors and agents left me feeling bereft. Depleted. How could I show them that I was worth it? I couldn’t try any harder. I was exhausted. How could I be the person they wanted me to be?

Truth: Playing the victim gets you the part no-one else wants. 

The dream of being an opera singer had turned into a living nightmare. The thought of singing actually made me feel physically sick. Each time I opened my mouth to sing I was repulsed by the vibration created through my body by my own unique sound. A sound which had been loved and adored by so many people, moving them often to tears. 

Closing down shop seemed the only way…

Until I was invited to sing at a concert with my singing teacher at the time, Patricia Sabin. I was one of three pupils Patricia had chosen to appear in a concert in London. Helena Blackman was the second. Jenny (whose surname I can’t remember!) was the third. 

Helena had just been on a reality TV show called How Do You Solve A Problem Like Maria. She was the Maria whom Andrew Lloyd Webber kept saving and was a jolly lovely soul. We had stories to share as I had also got down to the final 80 girls for the above show. However,  I didn't get to the televised shows, having been told by John Barryman in my audition that I was "very attractive looking, but not what they were looking for!" 

Fact: Pretty girls are numbed down and discriminated against too. 

Jenny at that time had just joined a new vocal trio called The Marjorie Belles. Founded by actress Vanessa Havell, The Belles was formed to keep her performing when she was out of professionally casted work. (Sigh of relief from the wings! I wasn’t the only one being rejected!) 

Jenny was so enthralled with her new 1940s repertoire that she shared the manuscript for Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy with us to perform at Patricia’s concert. I had no idea at the time that Jenny was part of a newly formed trio who were in search of their seductive middle voice to glue the sound together. She was overjoyed mid-rehearsal when I voiced that "I’d love to start my own acapella group and sing songs from the roaring forties to the swinging sixties…"

Jenny invited me to meet Vanessa. A phone call later and I was on the train going to London for an audition. And this time, I got the part. 

Truth: My face fitted this bill 

I spent five years singing with The Marjorie Belles and performed all around London. Debuting in The West End, opening TV awards, entertaining the troops at Goodwood Revival, plus appearances on TV and Radio. Finally, the route to my singing career had opened. I was fulfilled. I even wrote to Vera Lynn and shared our music with her and received a handwritten reply from one of my vocal heroines. 

Life had evolved. My singing career was going well, and I had so much more confidence. Yet I was still bulimic and at war with myself internally. 

Finally, I woke up one day. Stretched into my 27-year-old body and feeling a longing to know myself in a new way. To stop making myself sick both literally and physically, heal my sore open wounds and put Natalie first.

As I dived deep into the bones of my anatomical makeup, I began to question many of my beliefs and realised that I had been asleep. I had been a human doing life rather than a human living life. I had been believing my part as the victim so much I didn’t even know that there were other parts available for me to play out. 

In Search of Something Else

Slowly, I began to face the truths of my past. I met many soul connectors (all of whom you will meet in this book) who cracked me open and guided me to heal my wounds. They made me face deep shadows. 

Shadows which I had been hiding from. Shadows that I had been living from. Some shadows I didn’t even know existed. 

Slowly. Little by little, day by day as I surrendered to the unknown and adopted the phrase "fuck it, let’s do it anyway", my soul began to awaken. I began to feel more alive as I discovered new traditions, new philosophies, new fitness regimes, new food, new countries, new wisdoms, new conversations, new questions, new people. 

New Ways of Being 

The following ten years turned out to be a beautiful cacophony of unravelling realisations. The more I faced my fears and invited in the tears, the more I accepted my imperfections. This in turn gave me the confidence to totally embody the skin I was born into.  

The deeper I dove into the truth of who I was and shed the layers of society’s teachings, I began to embody the essence of Natalie. Finally, at the age of 33, I took my final curtain call. 

No More Numbing Down 

No more numbing down to standing ovations for the mouse hiding constantly in the corner. 

No more numbing down and saying yes to everything that strangled the very essence of my being from the veins which kept me alive, even when I wanted to die. 

No more numbing down going round and round on that carousel, working hard for someone else’s gain.

No more numbing down and sacrificing my energy to toxic relationships, especially the one I had built with myself. 

No more numbing down; it was time to say bye-bye to the self-sabotaging talk and mind-numbing jobs. 

No more numbing down: the time was now to stand up and say, "my name is Natalie Farrell" I am a perfectionist! And I have been abusing the right to be beautifully, authentically, enough just as I am. 

Now I am ready to let go of all I own and possess and settle into my own skin. 

So, I did. I stepped into my vagabond shoes. I sold all that I owned and I lived with nine other housemates in rented accommodation for four years whilst I was in recovery. Recovery from myself. 

And society’s conditioning. Releasing language patterns that weren’t mine. Beliefs that I had inherited from someone else. Letting go of shame and inviting silence in to fill the space. With the strength I had within, I created my own rehabilitation programme. Opening up to the possibilities of the unexpected encounters within my days and months, rather than reacting anxiously to not knowing what the future had in store for me. 

Unearthed my truth to unleash my soul’s desires.

As I unravelled the (k)nots from my past, blood-red pulsating energy began to flow again. I was shedding my skin. And as I did, do you know what began to appear in its place? 

Feathers. 

Beautiful, soft feathers holding me so I could show up every day in my naked truth as the person I was born to be. A relaxed, gentle, open, cosmic soul. A light leader prepared to open up and share in a visceral way as the fully authentic expression of self. 

A soul ready to step into the vagabond ways and experience the unconventional approach to life and business. Taking both my feminine and masculine along for the ride whilst remaining devoted to the vow to myself to keep them in conversation with each other, holding space for others in a balanced manner. 

It took guts and determination. But after those thirteen years of self-discovery, I had unleashed a wild bundle of sensations inside of me. Through sweat, tears, hard work, patience and super soul-fuelled self-love strategies, I alchemised into a burning furnace of a universe called Natalie Farrell. 

As I invited myself to fiercely love the person I was born to be, I found it easier to embrace my imperfections. Over time, I honoured each aspect of me in a graceful way, which in turn opened a portal – allowing me to divinely surrender to myself.

I was finally swimming with my soul and I accepted that I am a force of nature.

I always have been. 

I always will be. 

Let Your Soul Fuel the Way 

Now having just turned 40, I firmly stand grounded and risen in my power decade. There is no more numbing down. I am fully owning who I am and embodying my divine feminine (DF) and divine masculine (DM) energy. 

My DF likes to show up as a juicy combo of seductive Priestess and Creatrix, dressed up frayed glam style. My DM likes to show up more subtly as a Wise Soul with a combo of ancient intelligence and sensitive teachings, letting his roaring presence be felt, dressed in high heels and tight jeans. 

It’s the roaring twenties, right! Let’s mix it up! Get fluid in our views. 

Reclaiming these parts of myself allowed me to GO ALL IN. Honouring my soul’s desires, purpose, and plan to write this magical companion for soul hustlers waking up across the globe. Every page and practice ignited, tried and tested by my years of healing others and taking them over the caterpillar threshold and through the gateway to Butterflydom. 

And I want this for you too, darling one. 

I want you to show up here fully, naked in your truth. That’s why I am starting this conversation – your conversation – by asking you the following questions to rustle your soul-hustling feathers:

Are you ready to leave your stuff behind? 

Are you ready to step into those vagabond ways for a short while as you whirl into a world of the unknown? 

Are you ready right now to shower yourself in the self-healing void? 

Whether you answered Yes Yes YES or No No NO...fuck it, let’s get this soul revolution started!

Navigating The Transitions

It can feel lonely sometimes, right? Like you are the only person going through the change. And then when you do eventually try on a braver outfit, you are unsure of how to navigate your way through the ever-unfolding transitions that occur as a by-product of change. 

You most certainly are not alone. I am here with you and have created a soft yet powerful path for you to build foundations to become your own coach. Making way for you to begin to navigate the blind trials towards trying something else and laying foundations to fully own your out-of-the-ordinary soul story.  

This is a book for a lifetime. A companion of which I hope you pass down and share with generations and females in your soul family as we come together, reclaiming our feminine roots and reclaiming the power of the collective. A book like this becomes a resonant resource for you to delve into anytime you and your intuition are in need. 

It has all the resources you need to look after yourself in a kind yet revolutionary way. You will find the right tools for you to create your own soul repair kit. Opening your mind and body to discover how much easier life is as you allow yourself to move within its flow. 

Watch out too for the secret weapon that is revealed in Part Two, helping you to ignite your truth as you start to own your language and reactivate the power of your intuitive voice. Finally, a whisper of relief flutters through you as you surrender to listen deeply to what’s being said underneath, healing and transmuting those old, unwanted, seriously out-of-date wounds.

Rather than turn to others for validation and approval, you’ll learn how to turn that problem around and look within for the answer. As we wander through these pages together, instead of saying "why does it always happen to everyone else and not me?" you will begin to rise from each fall with deeper knowledge that it is OK to be different. 

OK to be an edge-dweller unravelling yourself from the strain of society. OK to feel like you don’t belong here on this planet. OK to not agree with your family and friends as you wake up and free yourself from the binds of ‘have tos’, ‘shoulds’ and ‘musts’. 

As you invite in these new