Woman of War

By Анна (Anna) Шила (Shila)

Woman of War is the first attempt to write about the military conflict on the East of our country in the light of women stories. The book contains 25 stories. Each story is based on real-life events narrated by real-life women — paramedics, volunteers, journalists, and servicewomen who have gone to the front line to fight for their Homeland.

The author tells their hard fates, but at the same time, each heroine is a composite character displaying life and emotions of many female warriors. The women are speakers of Ukraine. Their voice is worth hearing and paying heed to.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Folio
• Release date: May 5, 2020
• ISBN: 9789660384088

Book preview

Annotation

Woman of War is the first attempt to write about the military conflict on the East of our country in the light of women stories. The book contains 25 stories. Each story is based on real-life events narrated by real-life women — paramedics, volunteers, journalists, and servicewomen who have gone to the front line to fight for their Homeland. The author tells their hard fates, but at the same time, each heroine is a composite character displaying life and emotions of many female warriors. The women are speakers of Ukraine. Their voice is worth hearing and paying heed to.

Woman of War ISBN 9789660384088 Copyright © 2020, Folio Publishing

Anna Shyla

Woman of war

Preface

War ... Woman ... It should seem, these two are incompatible manifestations of human existence. War is often believed to have an unwomanly face. Not really! It does have a woman’s face. In most languages it is conventionally regarded as female. The war and the woman are closely intertwined. This concerns women’s rights in the military environment and the gender policy in the armed forces. It is a pressing, relevant, and highly charged problem on the agenda of the present-day global humanitarian space.

In Ukraine, the relationship between war and women has been counting for centuries. Has anyone studied the history of women in the war? Not yet. None special work has been published. However, this history exists and must be written to be preserved.

In the Trypillian epoch, husbandmen of Rus-Ukraine defended their land, with women firmly holding weapons and bringing to men new spears and swords instead of broken ones. At the time of Kyivan Rus, Duchess Olha led her host in the battles to protect the integrity of the state and the strength of Kyiv from pretensions of feudal dukes. In the era of Hetmanate, there were no women in Zaporozhian Sich. However, they were preparing strategic provisions for the Cossacks. Women played a very important role in World Wars I and II. Then they became a real militaryunit bearing arms against enemies and saving lives of soldiers.

In the Ukrainian-Russian war, the woman has taken combat positions boldly declaring herself a volunteer, a doctor, and a soldier. And here an acute problem of equal rights of women and men in the war arose. They have equal rights to death. Consequently, all other rights must be equalized too.

This book is the first attempt to write a page of the history of Ukrainian women in war. These are reflections about how, at the beginning of the 21st century, Ukrainian hero women are defending the independence and integrity of Ukraine and proving their natural right to be a guardian of their Homeland, on a par with men. This is an important step towards levelling the rights of military men and women soldiers.

The book contains 25 stories. Each of them is based on real-life events and tells about real-life people. Their stories have been written in the process and as a result of communication with the Heroines.

The world has not known this kind of stories. This is the Ukrainian encounter experienced in a womanly way. It is full of tragedy and heroism. Ukraine tells about this experience to the world through women, the fighters for the independence and integrity of Ukraine and the guardians of their land, who are ready to render their life for Ukraine at any moment.

Glory to Ukraine! Glory to the Heroes!

Yana

To secure peace is to prepare for war. To survive war is to be able to provide aid to oneself. To save lives of our warriors is to join the Hospitallers. 

Yana Zinkevych

From an early age she has been standing for the truth and justice. She is intelligent and beautiful. She was amongst the first volunteers who went to the East of Ukraine to defend the independence and territorial integrity of our state, to help Ukrainian servicemen fight the enemy. She is slim and graceful. Calm and cool-headed. Reserved and determined. Responsible and sometimes tough. She wields all kinds of weapons. A combat veteran. The founder and commander of Hospitallers medical battalion of the Ukrainian Volunteer Army. A gifted chieftain with inborn aptitude to leadership. She has survived in spite of severe injuries after a terrible car crash. The girl with a broken life, a split spine, and a dire prognosis of being disabled for the rest of her life. The one who received a doctors’ sentence, people do not live with such a diagnosis and barren for the entire life. The one who never gives up and believes in miracles. The young mother of a little angel. The one who comes out victor. The one who acts instead of daydreaming. Her name is Yana. She is 22 years old.

From a young age, Yana has been wishing for becoming a doctor. She wants to save people’s lives. While studying in the upper secondary school, the girl was viewing herself as a physician and preparing to enter the university. Unfortunately, it turned out that the knowledge itself was not enough. Yana and her family refused to give a bribe. So, she entered the biological faculty and had to abandon the dream of childhood.

There is an opinion, for any wish to come true, you must let it go. That’s the case of Yana’s dream. Although from the first attempt, Yana has not yet become a doctor, she began to save lives without medical education. As soon as the war in the Eastern Ukraine began, Yana realized she could not sit idle. Nor remain silent. She had to be there, in the field. Everyone is guided by one’s conscience. Yana had no choice but to go to the front line as volunteer. Having passed a shortterm training and adaptation, she started her service at zero positions. Make every effort. Do one’s best. At the front, Yana assumed responsibility to serve as chief of the Medical Service of the Right Sector.

Yana survived her first real clash near the village of Karlivka, Donetsk Oblast. A short battle that took count of casualties. The volunteers did not understand what a hell was going on. There was a true war they had known only from books and movies. The situation was unclear, and death did not wait. As the number of casualties was going up, Yana came to the conclusion she needed to take urgent decisions regarding the organization of medical assistance for the wounded soldiers. Then Yana started her path towards the creation of Hospitallers battalion. She had cared of hundreds people. Wounded, dead. Organization of funerals. The hardest task was to give killed in action notices to their relatives. The emotions were overwhelming, but she shrugged them off as they drew her away from work.

Live each day as if it is your last. Do not waste time on unnecessary and unimportant things. Yana believes and does so. Clear instructions, planned actions, steel nerves, detailed reports, and search for opportunities and money for the sole purpose of saving lives of Ukrainian servicemen.

Platoon, squadron, battalion. More than two and a half thousand lives that have been saved in the three years. Military servicemen, physicians, paramedics, and logistics professionals — more than five hundred people have passed through the Hospitallers battalion. People with big hearts who are risking their own lives for others. Life for the sake of life. Telling about Hospitallers, Yana starts talking louder. She speaks with pride and respect in her voice. People who, at their own will, have arisen for their country cannot but inspire. The so-called Hospitallers’ trainings have long been gaining popularity and fame among the fighters and the civilian population due to professional delivery of knowledge and friendly atmosphere.

The Hospitallers’ training session of May was completed. Behind, there were lectures, trainings, combat simulations, bruises, a little bit of blood, three teams, a broken finger, faith in one’s own strength, friendship, paramedicine... And what’s ahead is up to the commander Yana. Those trainees who go for their first rotation as assistants to experienced Hospitaller officers are gently called 'kittens'. They are the desperate people who will test their fighting spirit in real war. If this life-course trial is passed successfully, one can think of membership in the Hospitallers family, while the others will take home a useful knowledge and be able to use it in the case of emergency, Hospitallers members of Ukrainian Volunteer Army report.

The Hospitallers are called guardian angels. They are always busy in the hottest spots of the front. They have left home, family, and comfort for the sake of permanent residence in the battlefield. Instead of living a normal life, they put themselves under a constant danger and bombardments. Instead offriends they have to wrap KIAs (killed in action) in bags for corpses. Why have they done so? They could be sitting in peaceful Kyiv or in any other safe city. They could go to a well-paid business, wake up on alarm ring, and plan weekends. They could take a flight to Vienna for a cup of coffee and feel like European citizens. However, they have not done so. Those who call themselves Hospitallers have other priorities. They have boundless open hearts tooled for mercy. Life according to conscience and realization of the fact that they are doing a really great business are their only benefit.

Morning in Avdiivka started with a massive artillery shelling. Cluster bombs. Formation of new positions. Ruins and destroyed military hardware. The abandoned cemetery in the middle of the ruins of the old life. The war had lasted for several years and come off as shaggy dog story. In peaceful Kyiv, it did not hurt anybody any longer. The Hospitallers were the only wakeful and restless. They continued doing their work every day. Early head checks. Senior officers of groups reported on the situation. Gave overnight reports. They wished to each other all the best, but were ready for the worst. Received routine messages.

We have a badly injured. Abdominal wound, a fragment in stomach, hemopneumotorex, crushed collarbone. He is very critical. The operation was performed by the chief surgeon of the Ministry of Defense and his ATO counterpart. Afterwards, the Avdiivka doctors sewed up, and we assisted with bandages and treatment of wounds.

Tank fire! All get out from there! It does not end! Hmm ... what a bloody hell day...

We have one killed in action. He had no chance. He arrived in a state of clinical death, but for almost thirty minutes we were carrying out resuscitation procedures directly in the corridor. A large-caliber bullet punched the armor, even damaged his gun.

These are the words of those who call themselves Hospitallers.

In war, life and death go beside each other, sometimes holding hands. Every Hospitaller understands this. With each lost life a bit of Hospitallers heart disappears. And with every salvaged wounded soldier, it revives and becomes bigger. Being a Hospitaller is more than being a mere physician or paramedic. Being a Hospitaller means a willingness to help and to save at every moment.

That’s the way it is done. At the place of warrior death, a cross is mounted. The bodies of heroic fighters have long been resting in the homeland, but their souls are believed to come to help their brothers fight the Russian scum. It is a kind of cemetery among the ruins, the destroyed equipment, and the wreckage of the old life. In order to secure that no one ever forgets the price at which the peace in Ukraine is coming. Those who are not hurt by war, do not read these things, but I want so badly, the memory of the true heroes who perished for us to be eternal, and the respect and gratitude of people to be, at least, sincere. Dead but not forgotten! Glory to Ukraine! posted one of the Hospitallers on his page in the social network.

The Hospitallers battalion has been operating on sponsorship fees. The Hospitallers project pipeline includes the training center, military training of soldiers, evacuation and operations directly in the hot spots of ATO, informational coverage of events on the front line, medical support and assistance to battalions, evacuation of wounded, injured, and killed, arrangement of funerals, medical support of evacuees.

Everyone may be trained in the military camp. However, only the chosen ones are able to join the Hospitallers. The training lasts seven days. For these seven days, the trainees live and operate in conditions that are as similar to the combat environment as possible. The trainees have seven days to test themselves to strength of mind and moral courage. War does not forgive any doubts. It requires swift solutions. Mistakes cost lives. Among the trainers and curators there are doctors, paramedics, and combatants. The newly arrived Hospitallers are kindly called kittens. The question Why are all Hospitallers so cool and great? has become a rhetorical one. Not everyone who has passed training, joins the Hospitallers. However, all trainees receive valuable practical knowledge and experience. And still the Hospitallers are not made, they are born. The training just a push to wake up and to start living their true life. People who join the Hospitallers do this neither for money nor for glory. There are many other places where one can make money and become famous. The Hospitallers follow the call of their heart.

We gonna go on combat duty at Promka. where, of course, there is hell! Many wounded ..., Oh! Yana, send me!, Me! I want to be rotated!, I am reserving August, I take leave at my own expense, say Hospitallers.

December 2015 was not a holiday time for Yana. Although Ukraine was going through terrible times, the girl did not expect such a New-Year gift from the destiny. The car in which she was sitting turned seven times on the road. Yana got injury that seemed to be fatal. Full spine fracture, broken collarbone, seven fractured ribs, hidden hemorrhages, contusion of internal organs, high blood loss and ... coma.

Ukrainian doctors were the first to fight for Yana’s life. A few days later, she went to an Israeli clinic for treatment. Her relatives, friends, combatants, and Mother-Ukraine were praying for Yana. The prayers have been heard. Yana has passed the test to strength and escaped from tight embrace of death. The girl’s life has been saved but, at the same time, broken forever. The doctors did not withhold the truth from her. Yana heard she unlikely would to be able to walk and to return to full-fledged life.

It turned out that such ordinary things as running in dew and feeling soft green grass with the feet had to be forgotten. The doctors recommended doing rehabilitation exercises, but getting used to life in a wheelchair. Yana learned she would never be able to become a mother. Then she was only twenty years old. The accident split her young life into two halves. The youth had not yet had enough time to see life, as she was bound to a wheelchair. A vivid and smart woman of action was paralyzed and limited in movements. She did not imagine how she would be able to live a sedentary life. After all, before, her life was restless motion.

Immediately upon her return to Ukraine, Yana went to battlefield positions. She was suffering from violent pain all the time. The one who had saved lives and helped others, now had to take care of herself. The pain was so strong that sometimes it was necessary to interrupt a trip for several hours for being on a drip. The fate seemed to persist in testing Yana to strength. However, the woman did not give up and, clenching her teeth, continued to live and work. And then a miracle happened.

One day, Yana learned she ... was pregnant. The news seemed impossible and at the same time was so desirable. Doctors were convinced, Yana would never be able to become a mother, but the fate had other plans. At first, Yana was rejoicing and then took fright. In the course of rehabilitation therapy, she was administering heavy medications that could hurt an unborn baby. Yana had to make a choice either child or therapy. Her mind told, she had to take care of her own life and health. The doctors unanimously stated that pregnancy would kill Yana.

Once again, the woman had to choose life or death. During the war, she often saw how people passed away. Now, it was about her own life and the life of a little soul. There were very few chances that the baby would be born healthy. In addition, if she decided to maintain pregnancy, Yana would have to stop taking analgesics and other medicines. However, to hear the yearned-after mom became the main thing for Yana. Day after day, the woman was carrying her child. She did every step as if she was walking upon egg shells. Every day, she underwent medical tests. Unbearable physical suffering was accompanying the expectant mother all the time. Yana did not expect to carry the child till the necessary term as the doctors said, the unborn child could stop breathing in the womb every moment.

Yana went to maternity hospital, as if she was going to die. She wrote a will, either. However, the coming little Ukrainian girl seemed to make merry about how much everyone took over her life. A young Hospitaller and a future warrior was born on time, with normal weight and other characteristics. Without any hesitation, Yana decided how to name the daughter. She said, If God has spared my life, then I have to keep the life of my daughter. It is believed if God gives a child He gives strength to raise him as well. Several hundred Yana’s friends and fellows were waiting for this baby. Bohdanka was a three-kilo absolute happiness. Time flew. Along with the little girl, Yana was learning to walk. She joked she was ashamed, because her daughter was toddling more confidently than her mother.

Wheelchair does not mean the life is over. The Lord does not give more trials than the man can handle. There are the things that Yana does not want to tell anyone. There are the things Yana wants to forget. Her new being is an everyday struggle for her own and daughter’s lives. However, can the wheelchair-bound life be deemed a true life? Usually, people lead a miserable existence rather than live.

Firstly, it’s unbearable pain that cannot be alleviated by strong pain relievers either. It is more than a mere suffering from injury, as every part of the body aches, even that which cannot ache. She needs to make incredibly tough efforts for doing simple movements that the physically healthy person does automatically. The actions that previously she could do in a few minutes now take as twice as much time or longer.

Secondly, it is a struggle with an awkward bureaucratic system. When even sitting in a wheelchair she has to prove her disability, to show terrible images with missing parts of the bones, and to make excuses for an image with expired date for the medical committee. It is impossible, even with third-party help, to get into all public places, including the hospitals, to move along the city streets because they are not equipped with ramps. The public transport is not equipped with facilities for people with disabilities. Yana who has passed through several hundred battles and carried several hundred soldiers in her arms, could not resist a rusty and rotten system.

Her soul is missing the lost sensations, as she would like to discern heat and cold with her feet, to run on the grass or to lie freely on the back looking at the blue sky, to feel the brush of grass under her feet, to plash a warm sea scattering sprays around, to throw up a ball, to run a race with somebody, to spin the bicycle pedals, to wear heels though she did not like to do it before the injury, but now, for some reason, she began to like, to flip-flop barefoot on a warm floor and to brew coffee while the sun is rising in the east, to be physically self-sufficient and non-reliant in everything. Healthy people do not think of such ordinary but important things. Only having lost them, people understand how important they are. Can the man feel sick, broken, but happy? Everyone decides this for oneself.

Life is a challenge. Wheelchair-bound life is a forever internal struggle that is never rewarded. Because the best thing seem to have remained in the past. One must re-learn to live. Start all over again. Learn to love a wheelchair, to look nice in it. Do sports, train. Communicate with friends, do business, go to cinema, read books, walk with dog, give birth to children, contemplate the beauty, love oneself and let others to love, help people, take help, be strong and weak, dream, sin, and fall in love. Set the example. Know that many eyes are focusing on you and getting inspired. Meet expectations of people who find themselves in a similar situation. And command the battalion. Pass EIT exams and prepare for entering a medical university.

Despite all pessimistic medical prognoses, Yana is alive and continues to work. She has given birth to child. She is still doing rehabilitation exercises, every day overcomes pain, despair, and sorrow, which can poison even a healthy person. Yana has become a source of strength and inspiration for other people. She takes part in a charity marathon to raise funds for sport prosthetics for Ukrainian soldiers, regularly visits the battlefield positions, manages rotations of paramedics. She has travelled many hundred kilometers overcoming pain and fatigue. Yana continues to lift spirit not only at the front, but also in the peaceful life.

Please, share! I’m in the Charity Marathon for the Winners. Our goal is to raise funds for sport prosthetics for Ukrainian soldiers! Join our project! Almost all of us have no arms or legs or are wheelchair bound, but we make a lot of fun! Late evening, staying alone, Yana asks herself, Why am I? The answer comes, Why not?

"I wish we would be kinder to each other. Good can do real miracles, relieve pain, unite many unfamiliar people, it makes easier to endure the difficulties of life. I have been given a good thing — my life has been saved, you give me the good by supporting me. And I support everyone who needs it.

Two miracles have already happened to me — I survived when it was impossible to survive, and gave birth to my daughter when it was impossible to have children for the whole of my life. We have to believe in prodigies, in unusual things, it is necessary to do miracles. Whenever you can help someone, just do it and rejoice that God answers someone’s prayer through you.

Do good and let our children never see the grief and losses of war. We deserve to live in the world of goodness, free of war and evil! Personally, I will do my best and never give up.

PS. Take the cue and keep your chin up. Most of your problems either do not exist at all, or are foolish. You can do whatever you want. We must believe in