The Devil is in the Details OR How a 69 Challenger, Two Angels and the Devil Stopped the Apocalypse

By Hargrove Perth

When the end of the word is coming, there's no one better to have on your side than the Devil...

Time, in itself, is not real.

It doesn't exist.

The concept of time is nothing more than an illusion created by humans to understand the mysteries of the universe.

Except there are no mysteries.

There is only Her.

There is only Him.

And the hissing match that controls the universe.

So gather round, little daemons, and I'll tell you a story as only a master tailor could weave, about how two unlikely angels, one fallen, one not, along with Big Red kept the world from falling apart.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Paranormal Pen
• Release date: Nov 18, 2019
• ISBN: 9781393526292

Hargrove Perth

A perpetual night-owl and lover of all things paranormal related, Hargrove spends a great deal of time researching the larger than life characters of history to formulate characters unforgettable and strangely adored. She writes horror, dark romance, fantasy, and paranormal in the Adult, New Adult, and YA categories. When asked why paranormal, she said, "I'm the girl who cries at the end when Frankenstein is misunderstood, who wants Dracula to keep Mina in his arms forever... I see the humanity in them that others cannot." 2014 Author of the Year by Double Decker Books in Historical/Horror Dark Days Remy Broulette. DDBA 2015 Author of the Year YA Fantasy Miss Crabtree's School for Unnaturals, DDBA 2015 Nominee YA Fantasy Chronicle:Dark Sea Triad, and DDBA 2015 Author of the Year Horror (comedic) Coven Wives.

Book preview

The Devil is in the Details

How a 69 Challenger, Two Angels and the Devil stopped the Apocalypse

With the help of the Devil, Two angels, One Fallen, One Not, are about the save the world... maybe, maybe not!

Hargrove Perth

The Devil is in the Details, Copyright November 2019 Hargrove Perth. All Rights Reserved. No portion of this work maybe be copied, transcribed, reproduced or used without the expressed written consent of the author with the exception of excerpts used for reviewing purposes. This includes but is not limited to photocopying, recording, or by any form of storage and retrieval system.  This work is protected by the Berne Convention Copyright Laws of 1988, as well as the Digital Millennium Copyright Act of 1998 enacted by Congress, both of which protect this work from piracy and copyright infringement. Any transmission is strictly prohibited by law and will be prosecuted to the full extent of the law.

Covert design by Dark Water Arts Designs

Editing by Indie Editor Nancy

Printed in the U.S.A.

Dedication

To my glorious brother, who will more than likely never know a book has been dedicated to him, but I love him anyways.

With special thanks to Indie Editor Nancy.

Contents

The Players and the Naysayers

The Semi Apocalyptic Players

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine

Chapter Ten

Chapter Eleven

Chapter Twelve

Chapter Thirteen

Chapter Fourteen

Chapter Fifteen

Chapter Sixteen

Chapter Seventeen

Chapter Eighteen

Chapter Nineteen

The Players and the Naysayers

Elizabeth (Lizzie) Daemontree – Fallen angel originally known as Zaraphael, classified as a daemon by herself so the other inhabitants of Hell would stop giving her a hard time. She smokes, cusses, doesn’t give two shits about anything, at least that’s what she’ll tell you. One of God’s first creations and one of Her favorites.

Lorelei Angelfire – The Good Angel, or at least her intentions are. She searches for miracles to validate them for God. Unfortunately, her success rate is nil. Her name in the Garden of Eden was Adelphine.

Sarandiel – The Devil’s Girl Friday, or at least that’s how he views her.

Denali Deadwood – Professional driver and bodyguard to the highest paying client in Heaven or Hell. She thinks her Lexus is badass... as if!

Lucifer Lightbringer – God's first angel, the great Fallen One, Big Red, the Big Guy, you get the picture.

Crowley – as in THE Crowley, yes him, that daemon all the other daemons love to hate. It’s not his fault he has nimble fingers, a talent for sewing and Victorian sewing machine that can kick any other’s ass. Personal clothier to the Big Guy, aka Big Red, the Devil.

Michael – the shining ray of Her golden accomplishments, the only Archangel left.

God – Her Royal Highness, Her Majesty, the omnipotent one, you get the picture.

Gadriel – the sort of secretary to God. She’s more interested in play time than anything else.

The Semi Apocalyptic Players

The Four Horsemen, well Horsewomen – Death, (always getting a bad rap, no one lives forever), War (it happens), Pestilence (Lizzie and Lucifer would have you believe it’s the internet), Famine (completely preventable.)

Chadwick Morningstar – the sort of AntiChrist, sort of because he just wants to chill with Michael and has zero ambition to end the world.

Eden Eveningtide – Lucifer's daughter. She oversees the Grims, or is supposed to oversee them. Most of the time it falls on Lizzie since Eden is prone to screwing off. She’s in control of the Four Horsemen, or so she thinks. Beautiful, self-centered, and diabolical... what else would you expect from the Devil’s first child?

The Truth about the World

The concept of time, you see, is nothing more than an illusion created by humans to understand the mysteries of the universe.

Except there are no mysteries.

There is only Her.

There is only Him.

And the pissing match that controls the universe.

Sit down, little daemons, and I’ll tell you a story as only a master tailor could spin it.

Chapter One

Miracles Never Happen

It was a beautiful day.

The sun was shining. No clouds lingered in the sky. Birds chirped their melodies. Nothing about it could’ve been more perfect than if God had orchestrated it Herself.

Then again, she had.

Now if only that same beautiful morning could be enjoyed by the angel waiting on the miracle to unfold.

Oh for the love of all things holy, get on with it already! Lorelei Angelfire looked at her watch. Four hours had passed in the blink of an eye. Not a thing had happened. This was a huge waste of her time much the same as the other long stream of miracles Lorelei had waited for to unfold.

Only they hadn’t.

The woman in question, named Maria Osbourne, knelt in front of the statue of the Virgin Mary. A fine statue it was at that. Mary had been remarkably beautiful. The statue in this small, once relatively unknown church, did justice to capture that beauty.

Once unknown.

Now everyone on planet Earth knew about Our Lady of Grace in the small town of Oceanside. It was standing room only, all eyes fixed on Maria, all waiting to see her prayers bring the tears of the Virgin Mary to life.

It was very reminiscent of Bernadette and the miracle outside of Lourdes, France. The major difference between Bernadette and Mary Osbourne was countless thousands had witnessed people healed in the water of Lourdes after Bernadette proclaimed her vision.

To her knowledge, not even a fly had been healed inside the small church where Lorelei waited impatiently for anything to unfold.

Four hours of prayers. Holy Mary, Mother of God, if you’re making an appearance today, hurry up. It’s past lunch. I’m hungry, Lorelei said loudly.

Except, no one could hear her or see where she was laying on the steps right next to where Maria uttered her prayers.

Lorelei Angelfire was just that. Unseen. An angel who had been living on Earth since the Garden of Eden was crafted. Once charged with being a groundskeeper who reported directly to Her, Lorelei’s true talents were quickly discovered after Eden fell. She possessed something the other angels didn’t. More about that later...

Lorelei Angelfire could detect a miracle before it was about to happen.

Now, therein lies the problem.

A real miracle hadn’t happened in well over 250 years.

Everything was a wild goose chase that ended in nothing remarkable.

At least they had Starbucks now... It wasn’t much, but it was a small consolation.

What’s up buttercup? Gadriel asked, appearing next to Lorelei as she lay with her legs crossed, knees bent, with her right foot bobbing back and forth.

Nothing is up. That’s the problem. Lorelei stared at Gadriel’s flame red hair.

That was another little-known fact.

All angels were women.

Fallen or not.

When the War in Heaven happened, mostly because Lucifer had a stick up his ass about how important the mortal world appeared to God, aka her Royal Highness, She tossed Lucifer out on His ass. That didn’t set too well with the other angels. Lucifer was funny, sarcastic, fun at parties, an all-around likable angel, well minus the self-important part. Sure, He was self- centered, but who isn’t when you’re that high up on the God chain?

So no miracle yet. Damn, I was hoping this would be the one. Gadriel shrugged her shoulders dismissively.

Language, Lorelei replied, crossing herself in the hopes that God saw her.

The truth of the matter was, God didn’t see anyone. Not the humans. Not the angels. Not the daemons. Not the animals, the trees, the streams. Nothing. God was tired. She was tired of all of them.

I’d give anything to be a simple gardener again. Lorelei reached out with a single finger, touching the temple of Maria in an attempt to push the miracle out of her. Instead, Maria stroked out and died on the spot.

Lorelei pulled her white organizer out of her jean pocket, crossed off Maria’s name, and looked at the next one on the list. One down, only 234,623 to investigate.

What’s up with that, anyways? Why the sudden surge in supposed miracles? Gadriel snapped her fingers, allowing a cigarette to appear. She then snapped her fingers again, used the flame floating atop her thumb to light her smoke, and blew it out. She took a long draw. Damn that’s good.

Language. Lorelei shook her head before tucking her mini organizer back into her jean pocket. That’s a nasty habit. Plus, it’ll kill you.

Angel, Gadriel said laughing, pointing at herself. Can’t die, remember? Besides, we’re all stuck down here while Her Royal Highness has Her hissyfit. May as well make the most of it. I plan on enjoying it while She’s not paying us any never-mind at all.

Gadriel snapped her fingers, taking leave of Lorelei’s company, allowing Lorelei to wonder where the snarky attitude laden angel would be off to on her continuous adventures.

Onto the next one, Lorelei said, snapping her fingers on both hands then quickly disappearing as the onlookers gathered around Maria Osbourne wondering if God had struck her dead.

There hadn’t been any angels on the shortwave in days, that continuous stream of angel chatter that all of them had in their heads was something Lorelei hadn’t heard even the slightest whisper from. They existed as a collective, but not as a hive.

Thank God for that.

If they had existed as a hive, Lucifer could’ve taken out the highest-ranking angel and killed them all in one swoop.

It’s pretty unlikely it would’ve happened if they were a hive though. Michael and Lucifer were tight, being brothers and all. Plus, they were the only two male angels God allowed to continue existing. Lucy took off, leaving his daughter, Eden, to oversee Hell. Michael, well no one knows what happened to him. That last time anyone had seen Michael, he was sitting in a strip club, chain smoking cigarettes, and drinking 200-year-old bourbon that was a $100 a shot.

The angels assumed God left two males for them to choose from to repopulate the angel race. It was that or She just liked having them around to look at since they both were some delicious eye candy.

Truth is, no one knows for certain.

Lorelei attempted to look at the state of affairs in a more romantic way. God was tired. She needed a break. She had, after all, been in play since the very beginning, overseeing it all alone. Soon, all would be reborn, and the world would be absolutely wonderful just like it was when the Garden of Eden existed.

Lorelei appeared outside the Knee Deep in Our Lord Fellowship, shaking her head at the name. What a mockery! she scoffed, casting the doors wide open with the flick of her wrist.

Church was not in session. It wouldn’t be for another hour or so. She looked down the street at a few small eateries tucked away that were open on Sunday. Hungry was quickly becoming an understatement, so she motioned for the door to close before venturing down the sidewalk.

Tacos. I’m so sick of tacos, she grumbled. It seemed every single church she had investigated recently had one of two eateries in close proximity. Either a taco stand or pizza. Neither were her favorite. Lorelei preferred fresh fare, vegetarian, with exotic sauces that ramped up the flavor. Plus she just was not fond of cheese.

I need two vegetarian tacos please with a large water, honey and lime in it, if you have it?

The young blonde teen working the stand looked confused. Um, yeah lady, this is a taco stand. Tacos come with meat.

Do you have lettuce, tomatoes, avocados? I’m sure you do. So put that on my tacos and call it a day please. I don’t eat meat.

He shrugged his shoulders before disappearing into the back of the food truck. Lorelei rolled her eyes toward the heavens above, wondering when this stupidity would come to a screeching halt.

When he returned with the tacos wrapped in paper, Lorelei was shocked at how tasty they looked. Do you have any chipotle seasoning by chance?

Oh yeah, we do. The teen quickly turned around, grabbed a condiment bottle then handed it off to Lorelei.

Many humans don’t eat meat. You should consider adding vegetarian items to the menu.

Humans? You must not be from around here. You talk sort of weird. I’ll think about it. With his comment, he disappeared again, leaving Lorelei enough time for eating before returning to the church.

She watched the people who walked past her as she sat at the two-seat table alongside the taco truck. They all looked so incredibly ordinary, certainly not the type of humans that would invoke a miracle.

Not that you had to look extraordinary for a miracle to happen. Miracles happened to some of the poorest humans ever known. It had to do with faith. Faith gave the humans a glow, a confidence, the firm belief that God genuinely loved them.

Once, she did.

With lunch behind her, the growling of her stomach sated, Lorelei strolled down the sidewalk whistling How Great Thou Art.

The church is filled to the brim as Lorelei strolled down the aisle unseen, sat right in front of the podium, and began to watch the show.

Can I get an amen! Pastor Doddle shouted.

Oh God, please help me, not a revivalist, Lorelei commented before resting her chin on her right hand.

She nearly laughed as the young pastor turned around wearing a shirt that said ‘fearless’ in capital letters. Tuning out his rhetoric, Lorelei laid her hand on the planner, allowed it to expand into a full-sized archive before blowing on the pages to illuminate the reference material concerning the miracles at this location.

Hmm, from 15 members to over 3,000 in two years. Mostly Millennials... that’s a new twist. You had a vision that told you to move to Georgia from God, who told you if you build it, they will come. Ha! Doesn’t anyone know that’s from Field of Dreams with Kevin Costner? Lorelei flipped the page, shaking her head. "He could feel a spiritual baby living inside him, moving, drawing him closer to God. Wow. God, you do know this guy is nuts, right? His first miracle was