The Awakening Love Eternal One

By Dana Gaulin

After the death of her parents, Mina, the only surviving member of her father's bloodline, grows up in her uncle's lavish house on a five-hundred-acre compound.
Planning for the celebration of her and her sultry cousin's 21st birthday, Mina's mind and body begin to awaken. Haunted by her dreams, an unquenchable desire for a man she has never met begins to drive Mina mad.
Secret orgies and ancient deities leave Mina searching for answers to her past, as the desires of her mind and body, secrets revealing Mina Bellator's true identity and the destiny waiting for her begin to unfold.
Join Mina on an epic adventure, full of passion, loyalty, and intrigue.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Dana Gaulin
• Release date: Feb 12, 2019
• ISBN: 9780463157299

Dana Gaulin

Growing up in Southern Arizona, born and raised in Tucson, I began telling wild stories when my younger siblings came into the world as a way to help entertain them. As a young adult, I worked in assisted living and alongside hospice. I would listen to the tales of people’s lives, and I loved to write them down as a way to remember them After the birth of my second child, I decided to leave the medical field to raise my children. We traveled around the United States creating stories and learning so much from the people and the cultures around us. It's true; every place you go has hidden treasures right before your eyes. We traveled a lot, moving every couple of years, living in Arizona, Washington, Oregon, Oklahoma, Maryland, and New York. As I started looking into the possibility of publishing my books, I worried I wouldn't be able to make it without formal training in writing. All that changed, however, when I met a fellow creative writer who told me, "You don't need a degree to be creative." Her words inspired me so much that I assembled a team and started writing the fantastic adventures that were demanding to be freed. When I'm not writing, I love to spend time with my family, read, as well as blog, and vlog on my YouTube Channel.

Book preview

Book Blurb:

After the death of her parents, Mina, the only surviving member of her father’s bloodline, grows up in her uncle's lavish house on a five-hundred-acre compound.

Planning for the celebration of her and her sultry cousin’s 21st birthday, Mina's mind and body begin to awaken. Haunted by her dreams, and an unquenchable desire for a man she has never met begins to drive Mina mad.

Secret orgies and ancient deities leave Mina searching for answers to her past, as the desires of her mind and body, the secrets revealing Mina Bellator’s true identity, and the destiny waiting for her begin to unfold.

PROLOGUE

I am startled by the feeling of a cold, wet hand on my skin. Mommy, mommy. I look down into the misty forests of my hearts songs eyes.

You finished your bath so soon moon drop. Time stands still as I watch her lips turn up into a smile, her eyes growing large with excitement, a little giggle sneaks out of her and time is thrown back into its usual pace.

Well, my love I guess it's time to get tucked in.

But Momma, you forgot our story. I pause and look at her confused.

A story, what do you mean I forgot our story? Mina’s face becomes concerned.

Momma are you sick with fever tonight?

I smile at her. No Mina why? Before she can answer I hear Julia let out a giggle, my heart sinks knowing she has caused my game to come to an end.

Come, get your blanket and I will tell you a story. The sound of little feet running out of the room fills my heart with joy.

Emmeline, are you feeling ok? You do appear to be off in a distant world tonight.

I am fine Julia. It is true that I am fine, but the world seems off tonight. Silas, Levi’s new business partner, had a bed delivered to the house this morning. It's a gift to Mina, an olive branch between our two homes I guess. I hear Mina coming back from the other room, giggles along with the patter of bare feet on the stone floor.

I am already momma. I turn and look at her as she runs through the door. Her raven black hair is wildly bouncing around as she runs with her blanket in tow. I stop thinking about Silas's gift and focus for a moment about how much I will miss these little gifts of innocence, as Mina grows older. The love I have for my child fills me with so much joy that it almost breaks my heart knowing that she will one day be claimed by her betrothed and will go to a faraway land to start her own life and family.

I follow Mina as she runs around the new bed that was gifted to her, wrapping her blanket around her shoulders like a wizards cloak. Rounding the bed again, she giggles and draws her attention to the window.

Caw, Caw. Mina stops and smiles at the window.

Good night Mr. Raven. She slowly tiptoes to the window making a strange gurgling croak, followed by another caw. Smiling Mina stands looking out the window, I look to see what is out there. To my amazement there is an enormous raven perched on ledge, staring at Mina, making the same gurgling, followed by a caw.

Thank you for being my best friend, Mr. Raven. I hear it answer her with a gravelly caw. I love you too, see you tomorrow. Another gravelly caw and it flies off into the night. Mina turns and skips back over to me.

Did you see my friend momma? His name is Mr. Raven. He watches me when I am outside playing, and sometimes when I close my eye I can see the world from way up high into the sky like Mr. Raven.

That is fascinating Mina. How long have you been friends? She looks at me confused.

We have been friends for as long as I can remember. She hands me her blanket, and I wrap it around her then scoop her little body up into my lap.

Do you have other animal friends Mina? She smiles up at me.

Well, last week I started seeing a baby bear on the edge of the woods. Papa always says to stay away, but no matter how far away I go it follows me. So I did the same game I play with Mr. Raven, and it worked. I knew that the baby bear was looking for me, and wanted to have some lunch. So I went into the kitchen and took some fish, and fruit and set it on a stump. I waited to see if I told the baby bear in my mind where the food was if he would find it. I look down at her very interested in her story.

Well did it work? Mina pulls her blanket up over her mouth hiding her smile. Well did it Mina? Her little giggle slips out.

Of course it did momma, and Mr. Raven was even invited by the baby bear to share in his picnic. I look over to Julia who is tiding up the room.

Did you know about this Julia?

Mina has been coming up with wild tales Mrs. Emmeline. Children do that; it just shows that her imagination is growing. Disappointed in the fact that Julia neglected to tell me about Mina’s tales I dismiss her for the night.

Momma please, I don’t want to talk about my friends anymore I want to hear the story? I wait listening to hear the door close, so I know we are alone.

What story do you want to hear tonight?

THE story momma.

Oh, you mean the story about the rat who stole the princess? Mina’s face twits in disgust.

No momma, you know what story I am talking about.

Oh, that story, well let me see if I can remember it. She giggles and settles into her blanket.

"A long time ago when the world was still new, the goddess Danu made love to her beloved and became pregnant. Unlike the times when she birthed the planet and all the stars, this time her belly grew very large just like the human creations she loved so much. When it was time, great pains filled Danu's body. After a long time, a child came into the universe, but he was no ordinary child. Danu's child was much larger than a human child, and Danu's children were born with wings. They were truly magnificent creatures, and Danu loved them more than anything in creation. Over time Aziel-Uzzia grew jealous of Danu’s sons and sent them all to Earth, giving each son a job to do. Thousands of years went by, and the sons of Danu began to grow jealous of the humans they reigned over and protected. One night Danu visited her sons and asked them why their hearts were so heavy.

We want wives of our own, mother goddess. Danu knew that she could not create living creatures on Earth without the consent of her husband, but she decided to do it anyway. Danu took a rib from each son. Danu used the marrow of each bone to create for her son a mate."

Why did she need a marrow to make a mate for her sons?

Danu used the marrow of the bone so that each son's mate would be bound to him, with a bond that would last forever. You do not hate your hand correct? I look down at Mina as she wiggles her hand out of the wrap. I watch her look at it, and smile.

No momma I like my hand, it helps me find my treasures. She giggles again, and I continue the story.

When Azeil-Uzzia found out what Danu had done behind his back he became so angry the entire planet shook, and the people of Earth were in darkness for three months.

Does Aziel-Uzzia still get mad like that momma? I can hear a little shaking in her voice. I look down and she is hiding deeper in her blanket.

He hasn’t been that angry for a long time. So I don’t think we need to worry about it happening again. Mina smiles and lowers her blanket.

When the sun did finally shine again the world had changed. One by one the sons of Danu began to vanish, and the world was thrown into chaos not having strong leaders to guide the people. Almost a hundred years passed with war and chaos destroying the world. Then one day a son of Danu emerged from the chaos, he traveled the lands explaining the will of Aziel-uzzia and searching for a woman. His promised bride. Mina squirms and giggles over hearing about the promised bride. I lean down and kiss her nose, knowing it's her heart fluttering that causes her to giggle.

When the son of Danu finally found his promised bride he loved her with a love that was so intense a new planet was created just for them. Mina lets out another giggle, and I am filled with joy hearing her happy knowing that it’s her soul speaking to her.

Then what momma?

The bride was only an infant when he found her. So the son of Danu promised her family that he would make sure they never wanted for anything. In return, they would raise her in the ways of Aziel-Uzzia, and when she was 21, he would return to win her hand for himself.

Did the parents agree to do as he asked?

Of course. You don’t say no to the son of Danu. They raised their daughter in the ways of Aziel-uzzia and on her 21st birthday the son of Danu returned and won the hand of his bride.

Momma, do you think her parents were sad when she left?

I look down into Mina's dark green eyes. I know they were sad, but they were happy at the same time. Tears well in my eyes and burn as I try to fight them back. I will be sad one day when you leave my home to start your own family. But I will be overjoyed at the same time. Mina's face becomes serious. You have nothing to worry about dear momma; I won't ever leave you and papa.

Just then the door opens, and the sounds of heavy boots walking excite Mina. She jumps off my lap dropping her blanket on the ground and runs to the music of her Papa.

Papa, Papa. I have missed you so much today Papa.

Why aren’t you in bed little Mina? Levi lifts Mina into the air, and the room is filled with squeals of joy.

Momma was telling me a story, and I had to wait for you Papa to give me my kisses good night. I stand, my heart filled with joy watching them together. Levi cradles Mina in his arms and carries her back toward me.

Papa, you are a huge man. Do you think you are a son of Danu the mother goddess? I watch as he looks down into the eyes of his only heir. What will he tell her tonight? She is such a smart girl.

Princess, you know the answer in your heart, you must find it for yourself. He looks at her and kisses her forehead, then looks at me and winks. Are you excited about sleeping in your new bed princess?

Mina twists her face.

The carvings are scary Papa.

Scary, I did not teach you to be scared of things, my love.

I know Papa, but it smells funny, and there are weird faces on it. Levi looks at his pride and joy, then up at me.

Princess Mina, let me look at these faces. I will tuck you in and check your room for monsters. But I know first hand your mother has worked so hard making sure that every nook and cranny of this room is so safe no evil could ever get in. Levi stops only for a moment to kiss me, then walks over to the bed standing Mina on the mattress. Levi walks around the frame, inspecting the characters, one by one he tells Mina who they are, and what they symbolize. Satisfied Mina lays down, and I watch my husband take care of his little princess as no other man would. He loves her with every bit of his being and makes me so happy that he is not disappointed that she is not a boy.

Papa, please don’t leave me. Please tell me a story so I can go into the dream world hearing your voice.

Mina it is late, and I am tired. I promise if you close your eyes and go to sleep tomorrow I will tell you three stories.

I can see from where I am standing, a tear roll down her face, and I know what she will say. She will be brave for her Papa, and she won't make another sound until the sun shines through her window.

Will you tell me the story about the warrior king and the princess tomorrow Papa?

I will tell you any story you want to hear. Levi leans in, and kisses his Mina, she closes her eyes, and I hear them recite a children's prayer to Aziel-uzzia. Levi stands, and as he reaches for her oil lamp, Mina reaches up and wraps her tiny hand around his fingers.

Mina, I have to turn out the light. She is still holding eye contact with her Papa. What did I teach you about the dark?

There is nothing in the dark that isn't there in the light. Mina releases his hand; I hear him tell her one last time, Good night my love. I walk over to the door and open it, lighting his way into our room.

Good night my hearts song. I will see you in the morning. I love you my Mina.

I close the door and walk over to Levi who is undressing for the night.

Please, Emmeline I can feel your anxiety from here. he lets go of his pants letting them fall to his knees, he sits on the edge of the bed, and I help him remove his boots and pants. Levi stands and goes into the shower, I follow him. The water begins to run, and I feel it’s safe to talk to him now. Mina won't hear my words.

Levi I am worried. Ever since that gift came into this house, I have had a weird feeling. I haven't been able to concentrate, and I don’t like it. I watch as Levi washes his hair, he hands me the sponge and turns his back to me so I can clean it for him.

Emmeline my darling, I am the lord of this realm, don’t you think I would know if evil had found a way into my home?

Yes, but…. He turns, looking at me with those eyes that make me forget about all the cares in the world.

Listen to me, Priestess. I will never let anything harm my family. Levi reaches up taking my wrist in his hand, pulling me into the water with him, holding me against his bare chest.

What are you doing, my night clothes are soaked. I begin to laugh, as I feel the lightweight linen being pulled up.

You don't need night clothes, my love. I feel his breath on my neck, one hand on my breast holding me tightly to his body as he kisses my neck and earlobe. The other hand tickling the skin on my hip as his fingers lightly caress my skin.

Oh, Levi you know just how to distract me from the worries of this world. I don't stop him; I want him to take my anxiety and stress away even if only for a moment. Levi, we don’t even know this new business partner very well. I hear him growl deep in his chest.

Why are you bringing my new business partner into my shower?

I'm not, I am just.... Before I can get the rest out, my thoughts are lost on the pleasure of Levi's fingers messaging me.

I want to make another heir Emmeline. I tilt my head back with pleasure.

You know it’s not possible Levi we....

Shh woman, you don’t know what is possible. I will make love to you like my father made love to the mother goddess when the universe was created. We will see what we can make ourselves. I utterly let go of my desire for my husband, and all my cares are momentarily taken away by the man whose body made my own.

Tap, tap, tap. I hear what sounds like clapping in the distance. I just dozed off; I'm so tired and relaxed I don't know if I care but in the back of my mind; it does seem very strange. I roll over onto my left side. Maybe if I ignore it, it will go away. I close my eyes hoping that Julia will hear it and send someone to see what it is.

Clap, clap, clap. Again, I awake from the world between sleep and reality, where you can no longer tell if it's in your mind. I open my eyes and look into the pitch black darkness of the room. I can see something standing in the darkness of the night, lurking in the shadows, it's dark eyes staring at me.

BOOM, BOOM, BOOM. Shaken by the sound of what I thought was thunder in the distance. The shadow moves along the wall, like all evil things it scurries along the darkest shadows of the room, taking no real shape. Small at first then massive, morphing into whatever size shadow it can find.

Whack, clap, pause BOOM! I jump straight out of bed realizing that it’s the sound of someone hitting and pounding on the old wooden door in the back of the house. I yell at my husband.

Levi. Get up, Levi! Can’t you hear that someone is pounding on the door? I light an oil lamp, and the warm glowing light fills the entire chamber forcing the evil shadow figure to run. I grab my robe off the rocking chair in the corner of our room and wrap myself in it as I watch Levi walk out the door. I take a second lamp and light it, turning and walking over to the secret door in the wall, leading to Mina’s room. Slowly and quietly as not to wake her I walk to the center of the chamber. I placed her crib made of Rowan wood here before she was born because the temperature is perfect. There is no draft, to wake her, my precious little girl uncomfortable or sick. In its place is a bed that was recently delivered for her birthday. The bed is hand carved with intricately detailed carvings of forest animals and fairytale creatures. I stop a moment to look at the bed, a gift from Levi's new business partner. Such an elaborate gift for a man we hardly know, who is of new money. I get a strange feeling like someone is watching me and quickly walk to the edge of the bed. My heart stops for a moment, the blankets have been thrown off, and the bed is empty.

Panic fills my heart, and I thrash around the blankets. She must be here, I think to myself. She is just hiding. I call out her name. Mina, Mina, where are you? I can’t breathe, my heart has stopped beating, and I am feeling dizzy. A bright light from outside fills the window. I stumble over my feet trying to get over to the window to take a look. There are people, at least twelve of them standing on the other side of the pond, just on the edge of the forest. They are wearing black cloaks with white, expressionless masks on their faces.

Mama. I hear her small voice whispering.

Mina. Where are you, my love? I look around the room, and I hear her voice call me again.

Mama. I walk closer to the bed, realizing that her voice is coming from it. I look again, pulling all the pillows and blankets away. Nothing, she is not there. I stand very still and slowly lower myself to the floor.

Mina, my love call me again.

Mama. I realize she is inside bed frame. I begin searching around the base of the bed where the wood meets the floor. There has to be a door here. How did she get in there?

Mama, hurry, it's so cold, and dark. I am scared of being here alone. Panic sets in again. I begin letting my hands glide over the wood looking for a break in the panel that would open a door. Crawling on my knees letting my hands be my eyes. My hot tears burn my eyes as I fight them away, to let one fall would be to admit defeat. I turn away from the bed, facing the east. The sun is on the horizon and Venus is bright. I lower my body low to the ground and cry out in desperation. Azeil-Uzzia give me sight to find my daughter!

My body is filled with a warm, comforting sensation, and white light fills my eyes. I look at the bed and realize it has a curse of dark, powerful magic. I circle the bed three-times opposite of the Earths rotation and then look again. There it is, a hidden door guarded by the blackest magic; one so powerful it even fooled me. I swing the panel open and look into a dark abyss of nothingness.

Mina, Mina, I scream into the nothingness. Mina, where are you?

I am here mama. Her voice sounds like it is at the end of long hallway. I quickly crawl into the bottom of the bed. I feel something sharp tear into the side of my thigh and immediately look back. The floor falls out from beneath me; I am falling into nothingness. I feel things grabbing at me, they feel like branches and vines, but I don’t know where I am. When I feel the earth smash into my body, everything goes black. I look up one last time, and I see Mina stumbling over to me. What looks like blood covers her little body, I see where her tears have washed some of it away. Then I close my eyes.

When I open them again, I hear the sweet songs of our ancient people coming from the mouth of my little Mina. Mina, my heartbeat, my little butter bean. She looks down at me, her fingers tangled in my hair, and her smiles fills me with hope. What is all over you Mina?

I don’t know Mama. When you fall down the hole, you come out covered in this sticky red mess. I look down at myself and see that the same red sticky goop also covers me.

Shhh, Mama. I look up at Mina, she has her finger on her lips, and her eyes fill with fear. I listen and hear the voices of men outside. They are talking to each other about finding us. I sit up slowly. I can feel that I have broken some of my ribs. It is hard to breathe as I sit up. The pain is intense; I scream wildly to myself. I know if I can't control my physical body, I will give our hiding spot away. I try to take a look out of the window. I know where we are, it's an old abandoned temple in the heart of the woods. This was once beautiful sacred place, it's wooden walls built and carved by the hands of our ancestors. Ancient gods decorated with powerful gems and stones that dance around the temple walls when lit by oil lamps, and cloaked in the smoke of incense, and sacrifices. Now it is decorated with ivy and moss from its neglect from the people who once worshiped here. This temple that once gained its powers from its stones, and the people who worshiped the ancient gods. These walls that hid Levi and I on a night where we begged and sacrificed for our beloved Mina, as we created her on the altar. It now lies shrouded in dark and filth. Evil has used what is left of it's magic to transport us here in a trap. The little hope I has left is quickly taken from me, what I thought was the sun cresting the horizon, is not the sun at all. It is the blood moon rising in anticipation of its sacrifice.

How foolish of me. I had gotten so caught up in the lives we were trying to live, acting like humans that I let my mind and ancient knowledge be neglected. This evil is powerful, dark magic like I have never seen before. I hear the men give up and listen for their footsteps as they slowly walk away. I lay back down, so Mina doesn’t see me struggling to breathe. I feel her lay down next to me. Her small body snuggles close to mine for warmth as the night air grows colder. I close my eyes and pray that my our people hear my silent prayer, that someone will come for us, wherever we are. Levi comes to my mind, and I am not worried. He is descended from a long line of warriors. I know his people will come to his aid and Azeil-Uzzia will help him to find us when it's safe.

I wake again this time to the sound of my name whispered to me. Emmeline.

What? I look around; my vision is blurry. It is still dark, and I can only make out movement in the pitch black darkness. The sound of my name gets closer as it is called out again.. Emmeline? Emmeline where are you?

I recognize the voice this time and whisper back. Julia, we are in here. I pause for a moment waiting to hear her voice again. I hear nothing but silence in the darkness of night. I lay my head back down; I must have been imagining her voice. I close my eyes and begin praying again. I try to send a mental message to Levi. We used to be so connected that it was easy to do, but so much time has passed since we have used the old ways. I look down at my delicate little Mina. Tears once again fill my eyes. I am so angry at myself for not teaching her how to use her gifts. She could have protected herself, fought back. Instead she, like all the regular humans are weak and helpless. Azeil-Uzzia must be using this as a way to teach us that we should have never abandoned the old ways. The sound of footsteps breaks my concentration.

I pull Mina closer to me, my broken ribs digging into my organs.

Emmeline? The sound of Julia’s voice so close to me is comforting.

We are here Julia. I hear her footsteps coming toward us, crushing the dried dead leaves. I feel her hands searching for us, as she finds my outstretched foot.

Oh thank Azeil-Uzzia for bringing you to us. She tries to hug me, and I stop her.

Julia, my ribs are broken and I think I may have broken my ankle in the fall.

Fall? I can hear the sound of confusion in her voice.

The bed that Levi’s new partner gave Mina was a trap. It was cursed with dark magic and under it a secret portal. Somehow Mina found it and dropped here. She pauses a moment.

How did you get it? I chuckle to myself, the sharp stabbing pain in my torso silences me.

I used ancient magic; I called out to Azeil-Uzzia. I heard a small voice I hadn't heard in a long time. He showed me, as she sits next to me, silently.

Julia, I can't get up from this place. I pause for a moment as I try to swallow the chicken bone lodged in my throat. Julia, take Mina and hide in the woods, follow the river to the house of the Mikahailo family. Leave Mina there with them; they will hide her, and protect her at all costs. Julia sits quietly next to me for a moment.

I will take her there Emmeline, and then I will go find Levi. We will come back for you. The thickness of my throat chokes me again, harder this time.

Julia, I think they already have him. I can't feel his heartbeat anymore.

Speechless, we sit for what feels like an eternity. We are wasting time sitting here. I try to clear my throat quietly. Take Mina now, find the river and follow it. The Mikhailo's will help you, they will protect Mina, and they will come for me.

I will take her there Emmeline; I will bring them back here for you. I pull Mina closer to me despite the pain and place my lips on her cheek. I whisper a little magic to protect her heart and mind from the evil that is out there. Your blood is my blood; your heart is my heart, there is nowhere in the universe that you can go that I will not be with you. I look up at Julia and try to smile. Where are we?

The old temple in the woods.

How did you know to find me here? I can hear her take a deep breath, hesitating thinking of what to say.

They came into the house and ransacked everything, then set it on fire. I came here because this is where my mother would bring me as a child to teach me about the old gods, and new. She pauses again.

I thought you would be here with Mina because it’s a safe place.

I close my eyes again and fight back the tears. It is not always easy being able to detect deception in peoples hearts, but I have no choice. I have to trust that she loves my daughter as much as I do because I can not fight what is outside. Maybe my gifts are not working correctly from hitting my head with such force on the hard stone floor. Either way, I have to let my hearts song go, she is in the hands of Azeil-Uzzia. I pray that my old magic is strong enough to protect her from this evil. I look up at Julia. Take her, and run!

With those words I feel the weight of my little girl lift off me, the pain is unbearable; crippling, like having my soul ripped from my body. I am powerless to do anything. Go! I can no longer see them in the darkness of night, but I hear Julia's footsteps growing more silent with every step. I close my eyes again, trying to disconnect from my consciousness so that the pain will leave my body.

I am brought back to reality when I hear the shuffling of many feet. I open my eyes to white emotionless faces are hovering over me.

Cowards! All of you, hiding behind your masks and cloaks. I feel my body being hoisted up and thrown over the shoulders of an enormous masked man. The pain is too much to bear; I scream out to the universe. You cowards will be caught and brought to justice; evil will never triumph.

CHAPTER 1

Love is composed of a single soul inhabiting two bodies Aristotle.

The door bursts open, startling me. The wind blows the scent of fresh cut grass past me. I breathe it in deeply. He rushes in with great urgency and crosses the room in only a few strides. I sit up, thinking that something must be wrong. He is acting so strangely. Falling to his knees just inches from me, he puts his hands on each side of my head, cradling it like a delicate piece of china. Pulling me into him, he kisses my mouth passionately like the taste of me is going to be his last. Slowly sliding his hands to my hips, he guides me to the edge of an overstuffed couch. His lips start moving down my neck. Pulling up the old cotton shirt that I am wearing he reveals my irresistible and luscious behind. Lifting the shirt over my head, he leaves it behind my back to keep my hands from touching him and exposes my firm breasts. He greedily sucks and nibbles on my hard nipples. Rolling one around with his tongue, he pinches the other between his thumb and forefinger. I let out a squeal of delight. He gently guides my body back and uses his shoulders to keep my legs apart. He buries his face deep between them. I feel my body tighten with excitement. His hands still tormenting my nipples with pleasure, his mouth again kissing my venus. The combination causes such an overwhelming sense of ecstasy. Before I know what is going on, I lose all control. An eruption of sweet juice flows from deep within me. Hungrily, he licks up every drop and only when nothing is left, he stands up and smiles at me. He turns while he is walking towards the door and he looks at me. Thank you, Venus. I was thirsty.

I wake to the soft patter of rain landing on the tin roof above me, shaking and wholly disoriented. What the hell was that? I look around and realize that my satin shorts are thoroughly soaked, and the intoxicating scent of my mystery man still faintly lingering in the air, almost as though he had actually been there in the flesh last night. Great! I think to myself; my first sexual experience is with a mystery man in a dream!" Disappointed in my subconscious I sit up, putting my feet on the warm, heated rock floor. It is nice not having cold feet in the morning. That kind of thing has never happened to me before. I’m not the kind of girl that dreams about mysterious lovers. I am refined, dignified. Not a dreamer like some women, and indeed not a promiscuous woman like the ladies of the night. I have a life plan and don't have time for foolishness. Hellena continually reminds me of the fact that my existence is only due to the charity of her father. I don't want to live my entire life at the mercy of others. I want to travel and see the world; I want to go to college and learn business like Adrian so that I can get out from under the oppressive thumb of my dear cousin Hellena. I realize that this isn't the most traditional way of life, but I don't want traditional, I want extraordinary. When I look back at my life, I want it to be a life that will make my parents proud. I pause for a moment to think about the stories my sweet aunt has told me about my mother and father. My father was an incredible businessman, building his coal empire from beneath the earth to the top of the highest mountains, and my mother never stood in his shadow. Instead, she opened her doors to the people who worked for my family. She healed the sick and wounded, built homes for the elderly and the orphans, and together they created such a healthy community; the line between employee and employer was blurred, almost invisible. Instead, the town was like one large family.

I feel my stomach tighten and twist, the loss of my parents still hurts to this day, and that is why I must have my life in order. I must stick to the escape plan. I will continue with the smoke and mirrors chasing after Hellena, hiding her indecent behavior from my kind aunt, who would die if she knew the truth about her daughter. I lean my head back and close my eyes, taking in a disappointing breath at the thought of Hellena, and what she does at night while the rest of the world sleeps. Oh, Hellena, why do you always have your head in the clouds or more likely, buried in the pillows of highest bidder! I chuckle to myself, open my eyes and look out the window. The morning is beautiful. The sky is grey full of dense clouds, and a misty rain has set in with no intention of leaving. The air is cold and moist, the first signs that spring is upon us. As much as I love the long winter months, I am looking forward to spring. Spring turns into summer, and summer marks the beginning of my freedom.

I wrap myself in my robe and walk to the kitchen. The smell of fresh coffee fills the house. I sit down at the table where a cup is waiting for me to fill it. My Aunt Clara walks toward me with a hot craft. Good morning, beautiful Mina. How did you sleep?

I slept well, thank you. I had an unusual dream, though. Not one I want to talk about, but it was strange nonetheless. My aunt is the salt of the earth. My parents died when I was young. She and her husband, John took me in. They raised me as one of their children with my cousins being more like beloved siblings.

Clara is my father’s older sister. Like my father, Clara is tall for a woman of her age standing at five foot seven inches, her legs begin at the earth and never stop. Her delicate thin frame reminds me of the fairy queen in our childhood stories. Her long black hair hangs past her hips. We both have our family’s signature forest green eyes. Her soft round face, thin almond eyes, and their thick long black lashes are a window into her loving soul. Her perfectly bow shaped full lips and straight rounded tip nose gives her face an angelic look that makes it impossible ever to be upset with her for any length of time. She is also the reason why leaving my home here will be almost next to impossible. Clara is wise, loving, and an excellent gardener. You wouldn’t know it if you looked at her delicate hands and her perfectly long fingers that don’t look like they have seen a moment of hard work. Clara also has a temper. It is rarely ever seen, but it is deadly. People had said that when Hellena and I were getting ready to be created, God put Hellena in the wrong womb. So, I had to come through my father and mother for my aunt to have me. My uncle praises the fact that I am the spitting image of his beloved Clara.

Your father used to have dreams. Vivid dreams, they were like a vision of things that were to come.

I do not think it was that kind of dream. It was just strange for me to imagine. I haven’t dreamt since my parents died, to be honest.

Maybe your heart is finally hearing the spirits speaking.

Oh Auntie, aren’t I a little old for fairy tales?

I don’t know, Mina, are you?

A smirk comes to my aunts' lips, and I can see a little mischief in her eyes. I love being in her presence. I don't know how she manages all the things that she does and still be able to keep a beautiful garden year-round in her greenhouse. She teaches the children at the church twice a week and visits the women in town when they are sick or having a child. Clara manages the house, keeps my uncle in line, and has Hellena.; plus she always knows where her son Adrian is. I am amazed and can only hope that I am half the woman, wife, and mother that she is when I finally find my place in this world.

Good morning. I smile as I hear the loud sing-song voice of my uncle. The women in my uncle's life have made it a point to wake before him. We sip coffee and listen to the world slowly come to life, but the sound of my uncle’s voice is filling the halls, and seeing the blue of his eyes signals the day has officially begun. He is after all Master and Commander of his castle.

What universal god did I please so well to have a household full of beautiful goddesses such as these two that are sitting before me? I see Clara blushing, and she hides her smile behind the palm of her hand.

Oh John, you have always been such a flirt. I hear her giggle and she swats him with her napkin. He sits down with us and begins to tell us stories of what the workers around the house have been doing this morning. John’s voice takes a serious tone, and I catch him looking right at me. I panic thinking I have missed a question John might have asked.

I am sorry uncle I was lost in thought and missed what you asked. His eyes soften, and he sips his hot black coffee again.

You missed nothing little Mina; I was just admiring your beauty momentarily. I feel my shoulders relax, and listen to him as he continues.

I am thinking about getting another stallion in the spring. I believe it is nearing the time to retire the old one. Clara laughs at John’s joke. He isn’t talking about getting another horse. He is talking about this being the year that he is going to introduce my cousin and I as eligible bachelorettes.

I thought that we were going to wait until the summer solstice to present the girls to the world. There is a moment of silence at the table.

You are right as rain, my darling wife. It’s a good thing that I have you to keep me straight. Life hasn’t always been this peaceful with my uncle. He used to run his house with an iron fist. You couldn't get anything past him. He had his rules, and you followed them to the letter. You didn't ask why; you didn't talk back. You did as you were instructed no questions asked.

His father was a lifelong commander in the army. He was the meanest man I had ever met in my life. He ran his house like he ran his unit and John's father raised his children as if they were soldiers in his army. My uncle and his siblings were taught to have hard hearts, never to question authority. They lived by a motto: The great thing about excruciating pain is that at least you know you are alive. My uncle's father was the worst, and his son didn't stray far from his father's path.

Adrian always had the worst of John’s wrath. Adrian was supposed to learn all of the trades of the workers around the house; keep his grades exceptional, and be clean and in time for dinner, bed, and church. As the years passed Adrian grew older; he also became wiser. Learning how to avoid John's wrath was his highest priority. Adrian would get his work done, then disappear so that he could avoid contact with his father. Adrian would show up clean for dinner and then collect the scraps to take to the hogs. It never failed, there was always more work that needed done that would keep him away until dark. On Sundays, Adrian would come to help Clara and I with the children and food boxes.

Once, I tried talking to him about what he did when he was alone hiding from John. He would look at me harshly and tell me it was none of my damn business. So it did not surprise me a bit that when Adrian was old enough to make his own decisions, he asked to go to a college that was far from my uncles’ reach.

The day he left, I watched Clara’s heart shatter into tiny little pieces as the driver took Adrian to the train. After several months of being gone, Adrian came home to visit. I was so excited to see him again. We had been writing to each other every day since he left. Hellena had become jealous of the fact that we had grown so close during that time.

One day while Adrian was home visiting; he found my uncle in a trance of some kind. When Adrian tried to shake him awake, my uncle went utterly mad and attacked Adrian and Clara. He started throwing chairs and books at Clara. When Adrian tried to stop him, John punched Adrian in the face so hard that he blacked out. When Adrian came to John had Clara pinned against the wall, with his hands wrapped around her throat choking her. Adrian grabbed a cane made out of oak and smashed it into the back of John’s head. John hit the floor, completely unconscious. Adrian and Clara were able to drag him into a room and lock the door so that he couldn’t escape. Adrian found Hellena and me and hid us away in a secret passage so that John wouldn't see us if he came to and fled from the room. Adrian returned to where he left his father's unconscious body and was expectantly confronted by John; who was acting like a demon possessed him. John and Adrian fought hand to hand. Adrian was trying to save the life of his mother, and not killing the man he called father.

After that day, Clara was always by John's side. Anytime she was away from him for too long; his nasty temper would start to show again. It was almost like Clara had a spell on him. Only she knows how to handle him and keep him from losing control once more. To this day, no one can explain why it happened. After that, things began to change, and John became more pleasant to be around. Hellena withdrew to her room, and Adrian left traditional college to start traveling for business on my uncle's behalf. Clara and I began studying more in her garden, where she would teach me our families lost traditions.

My aunt’s heart was tested to it’s fullest extent that day. If anyone ever questioned the love and devotion she has for her husband, she proved it. Somehow, she managed to forgive him. I asked her once how she could live with a man, who tried to kill her and has made her cry on numerous occasions. She told me that when you love someone, it is forever; not just when it is convenient. She said that I wouldn't honestly be able to understand the idea of real love until later in life.

I look at my uncle and smile. Mina, my beautiful girl, have you thought about the party yet.

No, I haven’t really. I am sorry. I am just not into parties. Planning something that I am not excited about and is months away, is not high on my priority list.

I know you are a busy girl, Mina, but I want you to have a role in planning this party. He pauses and takes a sip of his coffee. This party is as much for you as it is about Hellena.

I promise Uncle; I will start to think about some ideas. He smiles at me and picks up his coffee.

Well then, ladies, if you need me I will be in the library doing what I do best. He walks over to me and kisses the top of my head. Whatever you find yourself doing today, Mina, be happy. You look like something is bothering you and I can’t stand to see you like this. He pauses for a moment, taking a sip of his coffee. And, because I am not a woman, I won’t ask you about it. But, if there is something or someone that needs a reminder of who you are, you will let me know right away.

Of course I will, Uncle. He smiles at me and pats me on the back.

Good girl. Then he turns on his heel and starts walking to his library. As he walks away, his loud voice fills the hall. Clara! I forgot to eat; please bring me a tray of meats and cheese. He pauses for a moment. And some healthy things too! Whatever you feel is necessary. He pauses again, and thank you, dear heart!

She grabs her mug and kisses my forehead. I love you, Mina. Hellena was out late, so you have plenty of time to enjoy your dream and your coffee.

I smile at her. I can feel my face turn red; my ears heat up at the sound of her talking about my dream. I can't help but wonder if she knows that I was dreaming about a man. I can't imagine she would know about the things I was dreaming. She is so pure and perfect.

I love you too, Clara. I watch her walk into the kitchen to get my uncle’s food. I look out the window, into the foggy morning, as pictures of my dream play out in my head. I hear the cooks come in and I am startled by the loud banging of pots and pans moving around the kitchen.

Sorry, Miss. We didn’t see you there. We will be quieter for you. I look at them and smile.

It’s alright. I was daydreaming. I need to go get dressed anyway.

What were you dreaming about? I look over, and a new younger woman is working in the kitchen. I arch my eyebrow in curiosity.

And you are?

Who are you? Her eyes narrow into defensive slits in her face.

I give her a puzzled look and realize that she must be new. My name is Mina. My aunt and uncle own this place; I live here with them. Her jaw drops and the blood leaves her face. She stumbles, I reach out to catch her, but she jerks away from me.

Oh my gosh, I am deeply sorry for my rude behavior! Her pale white skin turns to beat red.

I am no one; I am so sorry! I should have never asked you that! I look at her confused.

It's ok, really it is. I try to figure her out. I, for your sake, would remember that I am Mina and that Hellena, who is still in bed, is not as forgiving as I am.

Thank you, Miss. I will remember that. Irritated, I look her in the eye.

My name is Mina; please use it. I don’t like being called miss. I pick my coffee up and turn to walk away. Have a nice day.

I take my mug and the craft of hot coffee and walk back to my room. I find my bed already made and the reading lamp next to my window seat waiting for me. I take a sip of my coffee. It's still too hot. I sit in my chair and look out the window. I take a deep breath and think about what that girl had asked me.

Who am I, who am I indeed? I often think about who I am. In my soul, I feel like there is so much more to me then what I am, here in the house of my aunt and uncle. Who am I? Where did my parents come from? Where did my home go after I came to live here? Where are my parent's people, and why have they abandoned me? In my soul I feel like great adventures await me, I have a great desire to run and explore, but I am tethered here. Tethered to my Uncle and Aunt, and to a life they are planning for me. I think about it a lot. Who am I honestly, and the answer every time is...I am Mina; there is not much to me. Some of my favorite things in the world are rainy days, fog, reading, and learning about all sorts of new ideas. When I think about it, without Hellena, I will live a quiet life; tucked away in the perfection of the woods. I will be married off to a man I know little to nothing about and expected to learn to love him and birth his children. Will I be lucky if sex will be as satisfying as it was in my dream, or I will have a lifetime of making love with my eyes shut? I sigh taking in a long breath and reluctantly letting it go.

Winter has lasted way too long this year. I hear Hellena’s voice whining on the other side of my door.

I roll my eyes and get up to open the door.

You know that we have had record snow levels this year. Hellena looks at me and rolls her eyes.

I don’t care about the snow, Mina. She takes the mug out of my hand. But I am so looking forward to spring when the snow melts. The days get longer and turn into long, hot summer nights. She sits there smiling, her white teeth showing.

I look at her. Was the night not long enough for you, my dear? She sits down as I walk over to her to get a better look. My God, Hellena! What happened to you last night? From across the room, I can see her hair is tangled, not as if she had been sleeping, more like she had been drug around by it. Leaving it a ratted mess for me to make sense of. Her eyes blackened from her mascara running and smearing. Her lip stain has turned into rouge. Every step I take closer to her I notice her physical appearance worsens. I have seen whores standing in windows that are in better shape then Hellena.

Why do you want to know, Mina? I think she might still be intoxicated, the smell of alcohol and tobacco clings to her. I scowl at her, taking a better look.

You look like hell, Hellena!

I cannot tell you about my night, Mina. My night would scare you into a convent! She laughs at me. You would be a virgin for the rest of your life! It is bad enough; you are twenty years old and still haven't known the feel of a man. She laughs again, and I can feel myself burning from embarrassment. Is it embarrassing to be the only twenty-year-old virgin on the planet?

I pause for a moment, trying to think of kind words to say. Mentally I am screaming at Hellena to mind her own business. On the outside, I remain calm and graceful. I am sure that I am not the only twenty-year-old virgin. I cannot possibly be the only woman on the planet that has more respect for myself than I have for all my worldly possessions. I turn and look to see the surprise on her face with my answer.

Besides, since when have you been so concerned about my personal life? Maybe the question is, why do you think about my virginity? She pauses for a moment, then takes a deep breath in and lets it out slowly.

If you must know, sweet Mina, last night I was out with Rupert. I roll my eyes at the sound of Rupert’s name. He is a man whore and a pimp; he runs a brothel in town. Honestly, I think the only reason he is even allowed in our presence is that he brings entertainment to the businessmen of our town, and it’s visitors. But also because Rupert lines my uncle's pockets with the profits he brings in with his whores and toxic drink. Men love to talk money when their lips are wet with whiskey, and women who know no difference are there to hear about their enormous fortunes as if any of it will be shared with them. Well, a small piece of it will. The small portion given after his seed fills her and she has given yet another part of her soul away to the highest bidder. I roll my eyes at the thought, and my stomach turns, then the sound of Helena's voice breaks my silence.

We were playing cards in the VIP room at Chateau Chantilly. I roll my eyes again at hearing the name of his sordid brothel. One of the men asked if I had a sister, of course, I said no. She paused for a moment. But Rupert mentioned that I do have a cousin. Not only did he mention that I have a cousin, but he also mentioned that you were a virgin! My jaw drops in complete shock.

The man said that he couldn't believe that and he offered to pay ONE MILLION DOLLARS to have it verified! He also offered another MILLION for you to let him take your virginity! I feel like I am going to faint and reach out to my chair.

Are you serious?!? I am so angry that I am having a hard time hiding it.

Yes, I am serious!

You are beyond repair, Hellena! I sit down before I scream or pass out.

Mina! The sound of her whiny voice is driving me insane.

I said no. Not just no, but HELL NO! I do not want to hear any more about it. From this point on, my body and my virginity are not to enter your head or be spoken about amongst your vile friends. I stand up and walk to my window, I turn and look at her. I am not a prostitute, and the selling of my virginity would make me just that. I walk back over to her and raise my voice to ensure she can hear me. What part of ‘I am waiting,' do you not understand? I pause for a moment.

I know love is out there for me and I am patiently waiting for it. I sit back down, reach over and take my mug away from Hellena. I sip my coffee trying to calm down.

Mina, you are a fool! She stands up and throws her hands in the air. Do you know what two million dollars will buy you? She puts her hands on her hips and stands there looking at me.

It will not buy me respect, and it will not give me my dignity.

Her jaw drops. Two million dollars would allow you to support yourself. Hellena pauses for a moment only to see the pain in my eyes, and reload her insult cannon. You would no longer need to live off my father’s fortunes. Our eyes meet momentarily. I see her scanning me for injury, when she doesn’t get the satisfaction she is looking for Hellena continues.

He is a respectable man; it isn't like he is trash. You would be lucky if a man like him took pity on a pauper like you I am in complete shock that we are even having this conversation.

I said no. I take another sip of my coffee, trying to control the rage that is bubbling within me just beyond the surface.

But Mina ... Her voice pushes me over the edge.

I SAID NO! Drop it, Hellena. I won’t hear another word! I look at her and clench my jaw tightly, trying to win the battle of control within