Our Mary Jo

By Georgetta Potoski and William Nelson

This book introduces Mary Jo Kopechne to a world that has long remembered her, puzzled over her, and felt bereft for not ever really knowing her.  It is told here by the family to whom she belonged, and by whom she was loved.

"I watched Gwen and Joe, Mary Jo's parents, wait their entire lives for justice for their daughter.  They died without receiving it.  Perhaps it was because they were waiting for a justice based upon her death.  We seek justice of a different kind, a justice based upon her life.  And this kind of justice is not only possible; it is eagerly waiting to happen." ~William Nelson

• Language: English
• Publisher: Georgetta Potoski
• Release date: Jul 23, 2017
• ISBN: 9781386660736

Book preview

Mary-Jo-COVER

Our Mary Jo

By

Georgetta Nelson Potoski

and

William Nelson

Copyright © Georgetta Potoski and William J. Nelson 2014 All Rights Reserved.

No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical or otherwise, including photocopy, recording or any information retrieval system without the written permission of the publisher except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

Front Design by: CT Cover Creations

All materials presented in this book come from the personal estate of Mary Jo, Gwen and Joseph Kopechne. Pictures and letters, articles and quotes are all part of their personal memorabilia. Our intent in using them here is only to shed light on the exemplary character of Mary Jo.

We also send out a special thank you to Bob Shortz for his unparalleled generosity in helping bring this book to the public. And we would be remiss if we did not thank Becky Johnson of Hot Tree Editing for her wonderful editing work. Many thanks to our friends Down Under.

Table of Contents

DEDICATION

INTRODUCTION

CHAPTER ONE The Last Time I Saw Mary Jo

CHAPTER TWO Family Background

CHAPTER THREE The Celtic Side: Gwen’s Roots

CHAPTER FOUR Gwen and Joe’s Love Story

CHAPTER FIVE Life in New Jersey

CHAPTER SIX Diversity of the Projects in East Orange New Jersey.

CHAPTER SEVEN The Sixties:

CHAPTER EIGHT Mary Jo Goes To Washington

CHAPTER NINE Life Must Go On

CHAPTER TEN The 1969 Reunion

CHAPTER ELEVEN Gwen and Joe – Life Without Mary Jo

CHAPTER TWELVE Growing up with Aunt Gwen and Uncle Joe

CHAPTER THIRTEEN And then they had to leave us

CHAPTER FOURTEEN A New Beginning

ADDENDUM

New Beginning For Mary Jo:

DEDICATION

To all Mary Jo’s friends, acquaintances, co-workers, and persons interested and caring enough to write to Gwen and Joe at the time of Mary Jo’s death, we extend our heartfelt thanks. Without the letters, news articles, and personal sharing done by all of you, this book would never have been possible. We hope people will send us their memories of Mary Jo so we can put them in any future revisions of this book.

Please send all memories or materials of Mary Jo you would like to share to P.O. Box 44, Plymouth, PA 18651. 

Stay apprised of developments by visiting the Mary Jo Kopechne Scholarship Facebook Page:

www.facebook.com/Mary-Jo-Kopechne-Scholarship

INTRODUCTION

WHY WRITE THIS BOOK NOW?

Georgetta:

3

In our family, Mary Jo’s parents, Gwen and Joe, always had first and primary control over what the public heard about Mary Jo. We loved her and we loved them, and we believed their position was right and fair. She was, after all, their daughter rand they were entitled to come first in all issues concerning her. No one in the family would have never overridden any decision they made concerning her.

Now they have passed on, some might feel we are doing what we have always wanted to do: write a book about Mary Jo and clear the air about her death. Also not true. I am not aware of anyone in the family who ever intended to write a book about Mary Jo’s death. In fact, to write this book now, in the way we have written it, was actually only decided recently.

One spring day, a year or so ago, my son, Bill, and I were trying to decide what the right thing was to do with what remained of the physical estate in our possession of Joe, Gwen and Mary Jo. The clothes, furniture, linens, bedding, and personal items had all been distributed to family members, or anonymously given away. That part was finished. What we were trying to determine was what to do with the remaining personal papers including hundreds of letters her parents had received after Mary Jo’s death. I had read the letters years ago, and had divided them into categories. When finished, there were over eighteen binders of letters separated by state and then by city or town within the state. Next, I pulled the letters from all those individuals who had personally known Mary Jo. I sensed, even then, the great importance of that particular group of people. It is from these special letters that this book is composed.

WHERE THE LETTERS CAME FROM:

Many years ago, I visited Gwen and Joe in the Poconos. When I arrived, they were in the middle of cleaning out their basement. They decided they could no longer take care of their three-bedroom ranch, and were preparing to move into assisted living. Piled alongside one wall of the basement was a tall stack of boxes for reams of paper.

What are these? I asked.

They both shrugged. Those are the letters we received after Mary Jo died.

Well, God, I said. How many of them are there?

Joe smiled. We never counted them, but I’ll bet there are almost a thousand.

You aren’t thinking of throwing them away, are you? I was appalled.

We can’t take them with us. Joe said, and raised bushy brows at me. I knew what he wanted.

Of course, I’ll take them. Really. I’ll take them and go through them, and I don’t know what…save them, somehow. I think it is important we do that. They both looked relieved. Soon after, we stacked my car full of all the boxes. When I arrived home, I carried them into the basement and put them in a warm, dry corner, and there they stayed, for years. I was still raising a family, had a full-time job and was heavily involved with a local non-profit group. The letters waited.

After many years, I finally went through them. The first thing I did was make an excel file list of the names and addresses of everyone who had written a letter to Gwen and Joe. There were over 800 letters from people who did not know them; they were strangers to them. However, from the tone of the letters, they somehow felt involved in all the activities of Mary Jo’s death, the inquest, the fight over the exhumation of her body for autopsy, every nuance and implication of every single activity from inquest to the timeline for that evening was remarked and commented on. The bulk of the letters were received in 1969 and 1970, but every anniversary of Mary Jo’s death brought more. As the years passed, of course, they dwindled. In addition to the letters, there were hundreds of Mass cards, sympathy cards, prayers, poems, songs, and at least a thousand news clippings from all over the world.

I went through them again, and this time, I extracted specific letters. I removed and placed together those letters who were from people who actually knew Gwen, Joe, or Mary Jo. It was from these letters that Bill first suggested we start a scholarship in Mary Jo’s name, because these letters truly spoke of her character and who she had been, but also who she might have become if she had lived. It is through these letters and the scholarship that we share the good Mary Jo’s life could still have on people.

Bill and I once more read those chosen letters. Then we researched these individuals on the internet. Most of them were easy to find. Almost without exception, those we found had lived full, productive, meaningful lives. It was a wonderful experience having read about their struggles, to discover them in the present having achieved their goals and having enjoyed rich rewarding careers.

Mary Jo’s friends reached high positions of service, and had affected great changes for other people, vastly improving the quality of life for many. Mary Jo never had that opportunity. Her early death precluded her from ever reaching her full potential. She had not had an opportunity to live out her life and bring all the talent, intelligence and energy she possessed to completing her work of service to others. While it was wonderful to learn of her friends’ success, it saddened us greatly knowing she had been denied the same opportunity.

While we were mulling this over and putting into words how we felt about our research, we had a sort of epiphany. It was then Bill first brought up the idea of establishing a scholarship in Mary Jo’s name. (Scholarship information is in the last chapter of this book.) We decided to go with it. We knew Mary Jo. We loved her and wanted to see wonderful things happen because of her. In writing this book, we took positive steps toward continuing the work she began so many years ago.

At the time of Mary Jo’s death in 1969, the American public took her to their hearts and loved her.

Completely unknown to them, she became their daughter, sister, sweetheart, cousin, co-worker and friend. Mary Jo has captivated and enchanted the public. She was all those things to us as well. In this book, we want to share with you the Mary Jo we knew. Perhaps by so doing, we will all finally have peace and capture a sense of closure.

As Mary Jo’s first cousin and, having acted many times on Gwen and Joe’s behalf, and at their request, I speak here about my memories of Mary Jo and share some of the sweeter days that she lived.

Gwen Kopechne, Mary Jo’s mother, died on December 20, 2007.Joe Kopechne, Mary Jo’s father, died December 24, 2003. As the senior family members for many years, they are greatly missed. The winter after Gwen’s estate was settled, my cousin, Ruth, and I, chose the monument that was placed upon their lot at St. Vincent’s Cemetery.

Right now, someone else is ready to speak you…Bill?

WHY NOT WRITE THIS BOOK NOW?

Bill

Bill: First off, my mother and I don’t always agree on everything. She is kind of a dove. I am more of a hawk, so sometimes our paths veer wildly apart, but about Mary Jo’s book, we do agree. I frankly admit only recently did I give-up my anger about the way Mary Jo died. I was angry for years. I was outraged, and when I was old enough to understand what happened, I was bitter. I spent most of my twenties yelling, "Somebody’s got to do something, and my mother would calmly say, There is nothing that can be done. Nothing will change that night and bring Mary Jo back. In my thirties, I defiantly yelled, Well somebody has to say something!"I felt that way for years. Of course,