Women of X

By GK Pillai

This is the story of two sisters with contrasting approach towards the male dominated world. Looked down by males as maternity machines who are meant to serve and suffer, they show tremendous resilience to survive hostilities. The primitive mindset of mankind cannot fathom the secret of their survival.The genetic superiority of woman makes her a genuine mystic capable of surrendering self interest to serve the cause of family and society. The novel exposes the gender bias of modern vendors of spirituality and shows how they abet men to enslave them.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Frontier India
• Release date: Oct 7, 2016
• ISBN: 9781536589580

GK Pillai

Dr. Pillai authored many notable books on diverse topics. His academic credentials are in Chemistry, Physics, Psychology, and Public Finance. He turned to spiritual investigation after a dramatic escape from the jaws of death.His professional books include the highly acclaimed 'An In-depth study of Central Excise Duties in India' and 'Value Added Tax.' His spiritual books include 'Mystic Awareness for the Modern Mind','Upanishads', and 'the vision of a great sage 'Shri Ramana Maharshi'.

Book preview

One

RADHA SUDDENLY WOKE up cursing the crows. She was cruising comfortably in slumber land when their ruckus jolted her back to reality.

The constant cawing came from the nest on the Neem tree near the tennis court. Unfortunately the only bedroom in her apartment was too close to the main source of noise in the sleepy government colony. No one in her family dared to disturb her well-earned afternoon siesta for fear of a fiery tirade. But crows didn’t care for her cozy times or angry outbursts.

Why did the stupid birds make a nest on that tree, she wondered loudly at the wanton way they chose a small Neem dangerously close to the tennis court. A stray ball would hit the nest any time and destroy their precious eggs so zealously guarded from predators. Her fuzzy mind didn’t get any clue on their weird behavior. It was now evident that such interruptions to her rare moments of relaxation would be more frequent.

A catnap in the late afternoon gave Radha some relief from the continuous work that kept her awake till late in the night. She lost her cool only when someone intruded into her nap time after lunch. Otherwise, she was a docile, soft-spoken, and  patient homemaker who just did whatever the family wanted. While dozing off, she usually dreamt of some inconsequential childhood events. Such sporadic bursts of recollections gave her a welcome break from the boring chores of a helpless housewife. Ordinary middle class spouses didn’t have such onerous responsibilities. Krishnan, her physically challenged husband, couldn’t move about without her help, and her two kids kept her busy with endless demands for food and toys. Appa, Krishnan’s father, was too old to give any physical help, and her youngest sister Rema was the sole source of support. Some of her study time had to be sacrificed for house hold work, but Radha tried to keep it to the bare minimum. She didn’t want her destiny of drudgery to befall on her dear sister.

On holidays, Krishnan kept the kids at bay, and after lunch they usually ran off to the playground in the colony. Neighbors never interrupted her privacy although six families lived in tiny flats carved out of a monstrous building complex exclusively made for lower level officers. They simply existed on the designated islands without ever exchanging pleasantries even on festive occasions. Special care was taken to avoid each other if they accidentally came across at some common place. Only the kids broke the unwritten law of infinite indifference. Petty jealousies of parents didn’t bother the innocence of childhood.

But elders were fully aware of the happenings in each flat. They took mental note of visitors to other apartments, their vehicles, and the type of packets taken to the lucky beneficiary. It was presumably some bribe in kind for favors received from the official. Intelligent guesses were made of the value of the gift brought to oil a rusty cog on the giant wheel of state governance. Prying on each other’s privacy had been the absorbing past time of Indian neighborhoods before the advent of television. Now the idiot box quenched their infinite curiosity with real or imaginary information on the personal affairs of the rich and the famous. Sting operations on corrupt officials got dedicated audience particularly among public servants. But more than the media fare, happenings in the neighborhood excited their imagination and inquisitiveness.

There was another compelling reason for women to avoid Radha’s proximity. She was a healthy woman married to a physically challenged person. They guessed instinctively that Radha wouldn’t be getting enough sexual satisfaction from her disabled husband. How she got two kids from Krishnan was a great debating topic in the neighborhood. They watched keenly all visitors to Krishnan’s flat and imagined that an elusive paramour might have been the source satisfying her sexual needs. The women folk kept away from Radha to protect the morality of the men that could be easily endangered by the enticing presence of a sex starved female.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Radha walked up to Appa, her father-in-law, and enquired why crows made a nest so close to the tennis court. She usually got acceptable explanations from the old man that satisfied her occasional interest in matters beyond her grasp. Everyone in the family trusted Appa’s ancient wisdom that solved all riddles of life. But this time he didn’t respond with any immediate answer. Maybe the crows didn’t disturb his solitude. Nearing eighty, he was short of hearing, but retained fairly good sight. Even now he could read the newspaper without glasses. She usually repeated her questions many times and patiently waited for a response. The delay didn’t irritate her; both of them had plenty of time at their disposal. And they got along well with each other sharing the familiar facets of an unexciting urban life.

For Appa, Radha was like a goddess rendering self-less service unlike many arrogant Brahmin girls of her age. She never complained about too much work or demanded new clothes and ornaments. Very seldom she requested him to chip in with some physical help to massage Krishnan’s withered legs.

Don’t you see the nest over there? she pointed at the Neem tree near the tennis court.

Crows have been making nests on all other trees in the colony. But that Neem was cleverly avoided. They were probably afraid of tennis balls hitting the nest. This time the dearth of suitable nesting trees might have drawn them to that suicide point. There are too many crows and only very few trees left for making a secure nest. she observed loudly.

Appa nodded.

You are right. Till now I haven’t seen crows making nest on that tree. I t is actually a suicide point as the tennis court is too close. Maybe stranger things will keep on happening now. Even bitter Neem leaves may suddenly turn sweet. You know we are in the era of ‘Kalki Bhagawan’, the god of ultimate holocaust.  He would destroy the whole world very soon. All of us shamelessly deviated from the ‘Dharma’ designed for us by the gods. The almighty takes incarnation in every era in the form of a mortal to restore ‘Dharma’ by destroying demons. This time even the humans will not be spared. Crows are messengers of doom, and they are the vehicles of the restless souls of our ancestors. They are ruthless tormenters, the ugly bundles of black misery. Appa immensely hated their intrusion into his zone of divine silence.

Radha didn’t respond. The explanation of the imminent advent of ‘Kalki’ and his wrath destroying entire life didn’t penetrate her understanding. She wondered why an acclaimed incarnation of god, wanted to destroy his creations indiscriminately. Then why should intelligent people like Appa insist on doing only good deeds? What would be the ultimate reward for conducting rituals and observing fast and other forms of severe penitence?  If god’s intention was to destroy, why did he create at all? God should at least spare the pious priests who regularly offer him prayers?

Such doubts popped up in her mind once in a while. She had full faith in Appa’s wisdom and accepted his assertion that the world was about to end. She got the same answer several times in the past. Appa attributed all horrible happenings to the unavoidable arrival of Kalki, the symbol of death and destruction. The planet would soon become a fireball and even righteous people who stuck to the path of inherited ‘Dharma’ wouldn’t be spared. Radha didn’t care for future catastrophes as she was always preoccupied with domestic chores. Her life was already full of unpleasant events! When children demanded food, apocalypse wasn’t a helpful explanation to put them off.

Every day Appa read out to her from the newspaper some highlights of events that shook the world, and invariably, it was bad news. Terrorist attacks, rape, loot, and such hideous man made calamities, occurred with monotonous regularity in different places. Radha was not interested in the daily fare of dreadful events that according to Appa, confirmed the fiery finale predicted in Vedas. The God of destruction must be making human beings mad before the ultimate massacre. The newspaper only confirmed that we were set on an irreversible course of self-destruction. Appa held the firm view that the accumulation of our sins would get an appropriate nemesis very soon.

Appa continued his monologue, "People have no time now to think of God or read Vedas, or visit temples. Even Brahmins keep away from regular worship and customary rituals. Scoundrels from political party’s s took over the sacred places that belong to gods and priests. They looted the temples and idols were smuggled out of the country. In our neighboring state, Marxists’ who openly deny the gods are in control of temples. Money keeps their rationality temporarily at bay. They are opening a school for training low caste boys and even girls to conduct worship in temples. What will happen to our inheritance of piety enhanced by reciting Vedic verses for several centuries?

The ruling class has made fun of even the descendants of the great Sankaracharya. He was arrested and paraded like a common criminal. Do you think it augers well for the country? And can you believe it, the chief who initiated his persecution was a Brahmin? Our sins are too many and they will soon snowball into a fiery end. The burden of bad deeds would soon crush all of us like ants under the elephant’s foot. The crows are the omen of the impending doom. They really are the evil spirits searching for fulfillment in destruction and decay! Don’t you see their numbers increasing day by day? "

Radha agreed. She didn’t have any dissent to express. Maybe, she never had time to think deeply on such lofty matters. Appa gave the final solution for the occasional existential puzzles that flashed through her thoughts. In her world very few things other than cooking and serving the family figured for serious concern. Objects outside her family hardly evoked her interest. Crows, a few trees, and the tennis court filled her range of vision. She was perturbed only by the presence of too many crows in the colony. No other bird or human intruded so aggressively into her mental space with exasperating irritations. Even in the night they slept lightly, and gave shrill wake up calls as early as three in the morning. After attending to her husband’s calls until the late hours, when she reached the edge of sleep, the stupid birds would begin another round of unbearable chorus. They usually spotted a tomcat prowling around and raised alarm to save the eggs or nestlings. She could only roll on the mat helplessly as there was no way to allay their threat perception?

With the daybreak, they all descended on the central park. They would go on a frenzied scavenging spree for worms and insects, making loud noise as if abusing each other. Later, they would rummage the garbage bins, and by noon retire to the cool comfort of the trees. She counted up to hundred crows and sixteen nests in the vicinity of her building. In her stay in the colony of almost a decade, she collected interesting information on their intriguing habits and close knit community life. Their serious mannerisms sometimes amused her. Watching their squabbles, petting, and grooming patterns gave her some welcome distraction.

Her husband compared crows to tax collectors trying to unearth hidden income from the returns of the rich. Both were actually scavengers pretending to be powerful predators. Tax men cleverly avoided confrontation with the mighty and influential who got away with huge concealments of unaccounted money. Radha couldn’t get at the sarcasm underlying Krishnan’s comments. Many of his wisecracks were beyond her limited capacity to catch subtle innuendos. But she knew he was always right in these matters. He had plenty of brains and bright ideas. His colleagues kept on seeking his opinion and guidance. All intractable tax problems had solutions in his big brain having an excellent neural network. Many chartered accountants approached him for unofficial advice to find a way out of some deep tax muddle. Grateful tax evaders often rewarded him handsomely for the valuable counsel when they won the appeal and got a good refund.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

The severe summer sun slowly disappeared behind the tall office towers. The tennis court next to her flat came to life for the afternoon session. David, the trainer, and his ball boys returned after a prolonged lunch break. He gave quick commands to clean up the courts and soon the trainees arrived in cars and bikes. He told them to run around the central park for a quick warm up. Radha saw every day on the court the same motley crowd of trainees and their doting parents. Some of them, particularly mothers, urged children to run faster. They invariably huddled around David to hear more on the daily progress and future prospects of their precious wards. David was very polite and held out great hopes about the bright future awaiting all of them in the distant horizon. He was tipped well by all parents. Fortunately for him, the pervasive miserliness in Chennai didn’t come in the way of liberal tipping of tennis coach. Maybe, parents were apprehensive of their children losing the exclusive attention of the trainer if he wasn’t rewarded frequently with heavy rewards.

On holidays Krishnan watched the amusing spectacle of anxious parents competing to corner the coach for a quick appraisal on their ward’s prospects. You know what they dream of every night? Sitting in London, New York, and Paris, they would be watching their hot properties dueling in grand slam finals. Then the champion would come up to the family enclosure with the trophy and kiss them. They urge the poor kids to excel in tennis, studies, and in all other fields for fulfilling their failed ambitions. The kids have no childhood; parents want them to be the envy of friends and the neighborhood. And if the child fails, as many of them do, their dreams are shattered. Krishnan’s comments reflected his apathy to the game of the rich and deep sympathy for the kids toiling in summer heat to reach impossible targets. It was a concealed expression of his ire against the physically agile who breezed all over the tennis court.

Radha didn’t understand why people fretted so much on their kid’s prospects in some games. She didn’t see such parental devotion for children’s games in her school days. The main concern was the outcome of the annual exam, and her mother was always alarmed at the poor grades she got. Father consoled her with the advice to leave Radha alone and assured that the child would do well in something in which she was really interested. He didn’t try to reprimand or push her hard. But mother was terribly upset with the below average academic records of her first child, which was definitely a smear on the great brilliance of her husband.

The tall girl called ‘Rani’ was the first trainee on the court for coaching. Warm ups made her sweat profusely and the thoroughly wet shirt revealed a lot of her fine features. As the name signified, she was a real queen of the teenagers’ hearts. The boys always kept an eye on her and often got handsome rewards of deep insights in to her chiseled figure when she hit a hard shot. She got special, personalized coaching from David. Her short skirts revealed slender, moist thighs. The tight shirt gave a clear view of the shapely bosom with big bouncing tits. It was a treat to watch her when she served, or swerved back to take a baseline shot. Boys flocked around Rani for practicing a few strokes with her. They got an eyeful of inspiration that became handy later for creating erotic fantasies. Even the old man who came for an evening session with David was eager to play with her. His lecherous eyes shamelessly hovered around the wet spots on her slender body. Rani really enjoyed the desperate male attempts to catch her attention. Radha admired her beauty and guts. Rani sometimes hit sizzling shots, but mostly they fell on the net. Then she swore loudly at her carelessness and lack of concentration.

Two

APPA’S GENTLE REMINDER on the advancing time pulled Radha back from the tennis court to her domestic space. In her well defined evening drill, it was Appa’s coffee time. She went to the kitchen and made five cups of steaming filtered coffee. Two cups she poured into steel tumblers and the rest was put in a thermos. She handed over a cup to Appa with a piece of deep fried vegetarian snack called murukku. He ate it noisily relishing every bite. His teeth functioned well in spite of many other debilitating illnesses that troubled his aging body. Radha hurriedly drank her coffee, washed her face, and changed into fresh clothes to go out for fetching Krishnan. Not much time was required for her to get ready for the short trip to his office. She didn’t care to spruce up her unimpressive looks with any modern make up aids. She was short, and in her thirties, she appeared forty-five. Household work kept her busy all the day, and she had no time even to think about her looks and cloths.

The crows on the Neem tree made noisy protests when a tennis ball hit the branch below their nest. Radha was apprehensive that such a calamity would eventually shatter their lifelong efforts. How painstakingly they picked up the twigs and rags to make a cozy place to lay their precious eggs! But their choice of the tree too close to the court was an utter blunder not befitting the reputation of crows for shrewdness. David, the tennis coach saw Radha coming out of her flat. He asked politely, Madam, when are you going to send your sons for coaching? This is the best age to begin. And what luck, you got a court next to your house! The elder one has good ball sense. He can reach places, you know the kind of money and fame in this game.

I will discuss it with my husband, She replied, and walked faster to discourage further conversation. In fact, she requested her husband several times to let the boys join tennis coaching. Her elder son, Ramu was always up to some mischief or other. He couldn’t keep quiet for even for a second. The second one, Venky, was more quarrelsome and noisy. They jointly raised hell in the house fighting over petty things. Radha thought it was a good idea to put them under the care of David. He was nice and helpful. He had an effective way to discipline the trainees with rewards and punishments. One of her children might even make it to the top and play in tournaments around the world. She had seen photographs of many tennis players on the sports page of The Hindu and thought of Ramu reaching such position of eminence some time in future. As Appa put it, God never reveals his plans for us. Let us act our assigned roles and wait. Radha wanted to make the first move and then ask gods to help her.

But Krishnan wasn’t impressed with the phony promises of David. Tennis coaches were unreliable opportunists, and tried all tricks to rope in more trainees. Krishnan wasn’t keen, but the boys were very eager to join. Tennis is a rich man’s game, very expensive for the common man He used to say. She didn’t understand why he harbored so much animosity against the rich and their costly ways of killing time. The kids used to hit around some old balls given by David. He also gave them a broken racket. Krishnan knew that David was carefully laying a trap. The pressure would soon mount up from all directions. One day he wanted to discuss the matter with Appa and get his advice. Appa would consult the priest on the horoscopes of the boys. That might reveal the best course of action consistent with the prospects revealed by planets. It was time to take a final decision either way. He now knew that staying too close to the tennis court would not only damage bed room windows but also his wallet.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Sharp at 5.30 P.M, Radha reached the multistoried office complex. The small cabins and stuffy halls were overstuffed with dusty files and the entire building held on to a lingering murky stench of decaying paper and dirty coir carpet. Krishnan would get very angry if she was late to reach even by a few minutes after the closing time. On the road Radha sometimes met an inquisitive acquaintance who wanted to inquire on Krishnan’s health. But she would try to get away fast on some excuse and reach the office exactly at the exit time. Lower level staff normally wiggled out of their fortified cocoons much before the closing time.  Senior officers were the last ones to leave the building as many of them expected important evening calls from their patrons in Delhi. They waited patiently to receive instructions on sensitive state matters like how to fix political rivals with inescapable tax traps. It was Friday evening, the beginning of a long weekend for the privileged army of ‘public servants’.

As she entered, some people smiled at her; and a few nodded with a sympathetic attitude of understanding. The empty wheelchair that she pushed out of the elevator on to the fifth floor signified the saga of a poor girl who married an intelligent cripple just for getting a decent livelihood. Some of them openly approved her great sacrifice as a true sign of Brahminical heritage of accepting the destiny without question. For serving a physically challenged person devotedly, she would definitely receive immense rewards in the next birth. They probably didn’t see the contradiction that she was a born Brahmin, who had already reached the end of the cycle of rebirths. And about karma, only she knew what that gave her every day. She always wished that her destiny should not befall on any poor girl in the world!

When she entered the hall, Krishnan was engaged in a heated argument with some colleagues. She didn’t follow the cerebral issues like refunding of the taxes already paid, or demanding more money on concealed income. It was his exclusive domain and he had the best brain to unravel such profound mysteries. His head more than compensated the weakness he had below the waist. He mastered the mind-boggling mystery of circulars and notifications that created the incredibly complex web of Indian bureaucracy.

Radha often wondered how he kept so many complicated matters in his small head. It was probably inherited from Appa who learnt all Vedas by heart at a very early age. Krishnan was fiercely self-righteous and couldn’t stand any dissent on his legal opinions. He was only an upper division clerk, but even the commissioners acknowledged him as an authority on tax laws. He was proud of his achievements in the official domain and didn’t miss any chance to brag that he knew the law better than many senior officers.

Krishnan dismissed the informal meeting with an impatient gesture as he noticed Radha approaching with the wheelchair. It was getting late for him to give some rest to the exhausted limbs. The debate on the adverse effects of outsourcing routine work to private companies could be resumed after the weekend. A pen down strike could be planned to paralyze the efforts of the ruling party to liberalize the limping economy further. The government would come down on the knees when their main source of income revolted.  It happened many times in the past. The unionized employees in banks, government, and public sector frequently immobilized the country with their infinite demands for higher wages and perks. Even the threat of arrest or loss of job didn’t impress the belligerent labor leaders. They were sure to get back the jobs as a definite package deal on settlement of disputes would inevitably give them full protection of pay and perks. Otherwise, notice for yet another strike would be given instantaneously.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Radha led Krishnan gently from his seat to the wheel chair. He settled down slowly and gave her a plastic bag containing sweets and snacks. On Fridays, the staff canteen made plenty of subsidized snacks, which were sold much cheaper than the market price. Although majority of the public was underfed, government kept the staff well fed. Officers at all levels collected large portions of snacks on Fridays to last until the next working day. Regular canteen food, which was available only on working days, was really a wholesome feast prepared by a true Brahmin. South Indian Brahmins in any position knew how to cook up a traditional meal, and they relished it with gusto. Of course, the hybrid varieties born and brought up outside were not fully conversant with their culinary heritage. But Chennai Brahmins still held on to the original flavor of traditional values and tastes. The canteen employed an old timer who reportedly made the best snacks like Idli, Vada, and Murrukku that satisfied the highly evolved taste buds of the taxmen.

Inside the elevator, Krishnan’s colleagues gracefully gave way to accommodate the unwieldy wheelchair. On reaching the ground floor, Radha carefully set it on the road and pushed slowly towards their apartment. It was just five minutes’ walk from the office. Krishnan got priority allotment of a coveted ground floor flat on sympathetic consideration. Government had many such special rules for promoting the welfare of disabled employees. His tiny flat had one bedroom, hall, kitchen and a small verandah. A bit of backyard was available for growing vegetables if one wanted. Krishnan had no vegetation in his yard. He seldom moved out of the house except in the night for a conducted stroll. He couldn’t stand people staring at his disability. Their exaggerated expression of concern only aggravated the cruel destiny of a cripple. Krishnan confided in his close friends that he was capable of fighting all challenges and enjoying life including the pleasures of normal sex. What irritated him was the excessive display of fake compassion.

But at times his facade of bravado inexplicably fell to reveal the terrified real face of a helpless victim of self-pity. He was fully aware of the steady deterioration of his health and