Transcendence..

By Angela S. Walton

A LOVE THAT SPANS THE HEREAFTER

Sexually assaulted, Matilda has no idea this catastrophic event
will trigger an encounter with her soul-mate from the spirit
world, Lieutenant Thomas Heath Winchester.

Confused, yet somehow familiar with his provocative gaze and
righteous conduct, she is filled with a reminiscent hunger for
his very soul. She discovers having lived a past life as his fiancé
until tragedy struck in the year 1819. As the pieces start to fall
into place, the couple resume their love between two worlds,
a love tested when Matilda must take on the toughest role
of her life.

Is she prepared for the sacrifice she must make for her one
true chance at happiness with Thomas...

• Language: English
• Publisher: CUSTOM BOOK PUBLICATIONS
• Release date: Jul 9, 2014
• ISBN: 9781311539793

Angela S. Walton

The Australian born author resides in Newcastle with her husband, two sons and Border Collie, Bella. Her curious fascination with the afterlife since childhood saw her pursuing a pastime as a ghost hunter and co-founding Boo! Paranormal and Newcastle Ghost Hunters with a team of dedicated like-minded people.Although she makes no claim to have any psychic abilities, Angela is surrounded by people who do. She believes that the creatures to fear most are the living and that taking life too seriously makes for a dull existence.Transcendence, her debut novel, is just one of many stories to come! She may be lurking in cemeteries or haunted sites near you in search of ideas for her next book.

Book preview

Introduction

Australia is often called ‘The Lucky Country’, a land of opportunity and wealth. This may be true for some, but for twenty-three year old Matilda Henshaw, growing up in the coastal city of Newcastle has made her wonder when her bit of luck and opportunity will turn up.

When Matilda turned seventeen, her stepmother Gloria made her demands quite clear in her usual feral manner. ‘Leave school, get a job or you’re out of here!’

It was not hard to see that Gloria wanted Matilda out of her father’s life but she valued a pay cheque more. Gloria’s nagging was enough to bear so what could Matilda do but to shut her up and apply for a cashier’s position in the Manchester Department at a place called The Store. Now six years on, Matilda’s new designation as Sales Clerk for the same employer has slowly obliterated her childhood dream of becoming an historian and travelling to distant lands. Her mother would have moved Heaven and Earth to make this dream a reality but she was long gone, so what was the point.

Life for Matilda was different before her mother Rose died. Maybe if she had known about her mother’s pill addiction she could have saved her. She did not know her mother was already on a downward spiral and suffering from depression. Her father Trevor chose to ignore it, probably hoping that the problem would fix itself. His staying out every night was taking its toll on the family but he couldn’t handle the mood swings. Word around town was that he was spending time at the club with another woman. After returning home, he always fell through the door, drunk. Matilda often heard him stumbling about in the dark, banging into the walls and furniture, trying unsuccessfully to sneak in.

Trevor’s excessive spending saw him barely making the mortgage payments on the family home. Night after night the sound of Matilda’s parents’ bickering penetrated her bedroom walls. Her mother’s cries were harrowing. ‘Why don’t you love me? Please love me,’ she pleaded to her husband.

Trevor never did reply. He turned his back and walked away, leaving her kneeling and begging like a pauper on the cold wooden floor. To this day Matilda has tried to shake the sounds of her mother’s anguish from her mind, but it was buried so deep inside her that the memory can never be removed.

The day after Matilda’s sixteenth birthday her mother ended her life – a valium overdose they said, the empty box later found in the garbage. It was after school when Matilda found her mother sprawled out dead on the bathroom floor. She had been there a while it seemed, her eyes sealed shut and her blue lips parted into a silent scream.

On the day of the funeral, Matilda threw herself on the coffin, crying hysterically as it was being lowered into the ground. ‘Why did you leave me, Mum? I thought you loved me! I hate you, Mum! I hate you!’ she bellowed over and over.

In the end they had to physically pry her away from the coffin. Matilda loved her mother, but she also hated her for leaving her behind. She was left alone to stumble her way through this horrible world and found it hard to forgive her.

The months that followed were a nightmare for Matilda. Her father blindly stumbled through the days and weeks, growing more distant from her. She was unable talk to him about it, because in her eyes it was his fault. After the funeral Trevor took sick leave from his job at the steelworks. From then on he spent most of his time at the club, drowning his sorrows and frittering away the mortgage payments for the house. When he was at home, he was usually passed out. Eventually the bank reclaimed the house and they had to find somewhere else to live. Their new abode became an old weatherboard house in Bar Beach, belonging to Trevor’s rich friend who took pity on their situation. He was saving the house for his retirement and to this day the rent has never increased.

Who should have known that within six months of burying her mother, another woman would replace her. The day Trevor first introduced his fiancée to her future stepdaughter did not fare too well for Matilda, with Gloria’s distaste clearly evident. She looked Matilda up and down with her reptilian eyes and a sneer on her face – absolutely predatory. Matilda could not help but think of her father as the prey; he just did not see it coming. Gloria was no oil painting – in fact everything about her was the opposite of her mother.

Gloria was a short stocky woman with mousy brown hair permed into a mountain of frizz. Although she wasn’t plump, her clothes were always tight and revealing. She was a sly and greedy woman, who had cleaned office buildings for a living, until she married Trevor and realised she had a free meal ticket.

Gloria had taken it upon herself to move her spoiled brat of a daughter into the house. Charlene was fifteen when she came to live with them. She had made up her mind that high school was a waste of time and later took a job in a large construction company as an administration assistant. She was fairly attractive, with a blonde ‘Farrah Fawcett flick’ and a taste for designer clothes. She never lacked for male company either, seeming to be able to pull a rich new suitor out of thin air and discard him just as quickly.

When Gloria assumed the running of the household, she went about changing everything to suit herself. It became clear how far she was prepared to go when she slyly pawned the wedding silver and family heirlooms that had once belonged to Matilda’s parents. When Trevor found out he failed to raise an eyebrow. She had even thrown out their wedding photo album and replaced it with the new one of her and Trevor exchanging vows in the registry office.

Matilda rescued the album from the rubbish bin and painstakingly taped the fragile photo pieces back together. She imagined that if her mother were alive today, her life would be completely different. She would have finished high school and gone to university. Matilda came to the conclusion that she had probably been depressed from the day her mother died. So for her, it was easier to pretend that everything was okay and continue going along with the mechanics of living. Somewhere along the line she lost the few friends she had left in whom she could confide. Gloria had messed with her head to the point where moving out to start afresh was not an option for Matilda. Now it was easier to pretend that everything was okay and tuck those true feelings neatly away.

*****

Matilda 1988

Chapter One

It was eight o’clock on Friday morning when Matilda arrived at work to start the early shift. Brian was there, strutting about as usual. He was the assistant manager and considered himself a ladies man. He constantly grated on everyone’s nerves; he took advantage of his position, throwing his weight around with the staff because they were young and female. Brian was a short stocky man of twenty-five years of age with tight red curls and brown muddy eyes. He smelt of cheap cologne that barely masked the smell of stale sex and cigarettes. Everyone knew he spent half the day jerking off in the men’s room to the latest Playboy edition.

Now and then, Brian would ask one of the girls to retrieve an item from the top shelf as she balanced precariously on a plastic chair. Last time it was Matilda’s turn. ‘A little to the left,’ he would say eagerly, smacking his lips with his tongue as he blatantly looked up her skirt, spying an eyeful of her pink cotton underwear.

He was deluded enough to think that the girls enjoyed these little shows as much as he did. No-one, including Matilda, ever said anything to his face, knowing all too well that he had the authority to hire and fire, as he so often reminded anyone who listened.

Matilda was the sort of person who had trouble saying no. This had the ability to land her in situations where she would rather not be. This happened again, that same morning when Brian called her over on her break.

‘Hey Matilda, got a minute?’ He sounded insistent as usual. This’ll be good, Matilda thought. What’s he want from me now? Unfortunately, Matilda’s finer looks never went unnoticed. She was not stunning, but she certainly stood out as the pretty strawberry-blonde with the golden brown eyes. One of the cashiers flashed Matilda the sympathy look. Matilda rolled her eyes back at her as if to say ‘here we go again’.

Brian pretended to look busy as he ran the pricing machine over the newly unpacked merchandise. He looked up on Matilda’s approach only to give her the once-over before steering his attentions back to the job at hand. From there he hardly looked her in the eye as he spoke, pretending to sound nonchalant and a little bored. ‘So… doing anything tonight?’

Matilda almost choked on her own saliva as she swallowed hard. She was not expecting that. She was a terrible liar and had to reach in for something quick. Think girl, think. Excuses failed her.

Brian guessed that Matilda was unimpressed and quickly explained. ‘Listen, my friend Mark’s been into the store lately and wants to take you out tonight to see a band.’ Brian continued to sound his smug self as he spoke.

Matilda tried to remember Mark when Brian insisted they had met the once. Her not remembering him was not at all surprising, considering the amount of people who drifted in and out of The Store each day. She doubted herself and that was exactly what Brian preyed on. She gave Brian the benefit of the doubt and agreed to accompany him that afternoon to meet his friend. Even though she did not like Brian, the thought of going home alone to her room on a Friday night did not appeal to her greatly and the idea of seeing her first live band excited her a little. Apart from Brian being the ultimate sleaze, she guessed meeting his friend was innocent enough. What was the harm?

As the day progressed, Matilda looked down at her watch and saw that it was already ten minutes after two. It had been another busy day and now she had a quiet moment to herself. A familiar smell of cologne wafted past her nose, but she was unable to trace its scent. There were few shoppers around and no-one had walked by her in a while.

Quite unexpectedly the pressure in Matilda’s ears was becoming intense, like she was inside some pressure cooker. This caused her to become light-headed and unsteady on her feet. A blast of fuzzy warmth travelled up from the base of her spine, spilling out through the crown of her head. Matilda was confused. She gazed around to see what was left of the afternoon rush hour as several busy shoppers went about their business – no-one else seemed to notice anything out of the ordinary. Suddenly, all the lights dimmed, then it all started to fade away – the people, the service desk, the entire store, all disappeared before her eyes.

Matilda tried not to panic. Perhaps if she closed her eyes it would all go back to the way it was… no such luck. When she opened them she found herself somewhere else entirely. Her surroundings were hazy. Vague shapes of trees and some kind of building had her straining her eyes to get a clearer look. This was absurd, where was this place?

‘Who’s there?’ she asked, her voice shaky. The tall silhouette of a man dressed in a red coat appeared out of the mist. He was somehow familiar and an unexpected yearning said she knew him. Why was she drawn to him like this? She was surprisingly calm. He called out to her, but his voice was muffled and the words scrambled. He was trying to tell Matilda something, but she could not understand him. Whatever it was, she felt that it was important. Matilda reached out to try to beckon him closer but in a flash she found herself back behind the service desk.

The shoppers were still going about their day as if nothing happened. It looked like nobody had noticed anything odd. Matilda did not really understand what had just occurred. Obviously she had not died, so where had she gone and who was the man in the red coat? Why was he so familiar and what had made Matilda’s pulse race at the sight of him? Maybe she had seen a ghost. She was feeling confused, dazed, so many questions she couldn’t answer whirling around inside her head.

The rest of the afternoon went by in a haze of jumbled thoughts, right up until closing time. Matilda had forgotten about Brian; unfortunately he hadn’t forgotten about her. He nabbed her, just as she was coming out of the ladies room. She had changed out of her uniform and back into the pair of black Levi jeans, boots and a grandpa shirt she’d worn to work. Brian was slouching against the wall, waiting for her. She’d rather have just gone home at this point to think about the strange occurrence that had happened that day. She was still not sure if the hallucinations, or whatever it was she’d experienced, weren’t a sign of madness.

*****

Chapter Two

Brian was unusually polite, and explained that they would drive to Mark’s apartment and wait until his girlfriend turned up. Matilda blinked twice at that comment; wonders will never cease. Since when did Brian have a girlfriend? This person was certainly different from what she was used to; maybe he was only obnoxious at work. He even made a pleasant comment about the way she looked, not sleazy at all. Brian opened the car door for her, which was even more surprising. He said they were going to see the band Midnight Oil at the Palais later that night. This put Matilda more at ease, knowing that a plan was in place.

Perhaps there was another side to Brian, Matilda thought, as she buckled up her seatbelt. Maybe she had misjudged him. During the drive, Brian chatted away, like they were old mates. Matilda was not concentrating on what he was saying, because her mind was in another place entirely. The thought of that man in the red coat was consuming her.

It was a short drive to Mark’s apartment, which was up from the beach. He lived in amongst little boxed concrete units that were crammed into a large block. There were no trees or nice gardens, just rows of garbage bins that lined the driveway. Brian knocked on the door and it pushed open to find Mark dressed in a pair of old faded jeans and a grubby looking t-shirt. He was probably quite good looking under the dirty mop of blonde hair; it really did need a good wash. Matilda was definitely having second thoughts now, especially after the unmistakable smell of pot drifted out from the interior.

Great! A pothead. This was just what Matilda needed! Mark’s eyes were red and glazed. He smiled awkwardly, looked at Brian and then back at Matilda. He looked embarrassed, as though Matilda was not expected. Matilda dismissed his look and put it down to his being stoned. She broke the awkwardness by smiling back, extending her hand for a handshake. Mark shook her hand.

‘Hi, I’m Matilda. Brian’s told me all about you.’

Mark eyed Brian suspiciously. Matilda noticed this too but again she dismissed it.

‘Hello. I’m, um … I’m Mark, pleased to meet you.’ Although he was off his face, Matilda thought he sounded well educated in the way he spoke.

Mark gestured them inside, although Brian had already made his way over the threshold. Brian hustled Matilda into the lounge room and Mark followed behind. Matilda looked at the state of the place and decided that Mark clearly did little cleaning or housework. The place was a mess.

Matilda did not want to sit down anywhere, but Mark cleared the newspapers and takeaway cartons from the lounge and invited Matilda to make herself at home – as if! Mark then offered her a drink, while Brian looked to be rolling a joint on the coffee table. Mark returned from the kitchen with three cold beers and Brian lit up the joint. Meanwhile Matilda sat there, ignoring her inner voice, which insisted that this was probably a good time to leave.

Matilda knew she would feel better when Brian’s girlfriend arrived. They passed the joint to Matilda but she was unsure what to do. She did not even smoke cigarettes, let alone joints, even though they were supposed to make you look cool. She finally went along with it and took a small drag. Immediately her throat and lungs felt like they were on fire and she coughed, spluttering and gasping her way through the next few minutes, trying to breathe as tears poured down her face. Brian thought it terribly funny and promptly dissolved into hysterics. Mark just sat there, as Matilda gulped at her beer to cool her throat, feeling dizzy and a bit sick by now. Matilda wanted to leave and wondered when Brian’s girlfriend was supposed to arrive. Liking the situation less and less, Matilda asked Brian what time they were supposed to be leaving for the Palais.

Brian’s expression changed. He grabbed Matilda’s arm and squeezed it hard, telling her that they would be leaving when he was ready. Then, with an arrogant gesture he leaned across her to pick up his beer from the table, making sure that he brushed up against the front of Matilda as he did so. She could not help but shudder at his touch.

‘Change of plans,’ Brian suddenly announced, looking directly at Matilda’s cleavage. A short uncomfortable silence followed as she glanced over at Mark with questioning eyes. He looked away, embarrassed. She could tell he was nervous and not happy about something. Brian stared hard at Mark, until Mark announced that he was going to his room to get changed. Alarm bells sounded inside Matilda’s head, as she watched Brian lock the door and turn back to her with a nasty look in his eyes. This was bad; she was unable to think clearly and her body and brain froze. He was already moving up next to her on the couch. Matilda shoved him away and tried to get up off the lounge, but her legs felt as if the were made of rubber. He grabbed a handful of her shirt and pulled her back down on top of him.

Brian’s hands wrapped around Matilda like an octopus, grabbing and pulling at the zipper of her jeans with one hand, while ripping at the front of her shirt with the other. Matilda panicked and desperately started to fight back, flailing about with her arms, trying to scratch his face. This made matters worse, as the more she fought, the more aroused Brian became. Matilda was sitting on his lap and felt the bulge of his excitement through the fabric of her jeans. Brian became crazed, and slapped her around the head several times before picking her up bodily and slamming her to the floor. Fighting for breath, Matilda looked up, as Brian dove onto her, pinning her to the floor with his weight, laughing into her face, spraying spit into her eyes and mouth. She screamed for Mark to help her, her voice cracked and harsh sounding. Mark had his music turned up at high volume so he would not hear anything outside his room.

‘Mark isn’t going to help you,’ he snarled. ‘Just fucking shut up and enjoy it, you bitch! I know you’ve always been panting for it.’ His eyes were like black holes, as he smashed his disgusting, slimy lips onto hers, thrusting his tongue deep into her mouth, choking her, filling her senses with his foul taste and smell. Brian managed to half-undress Matilda and had his own jeans down around his knees, as he slobbered all over her face and breasts and groped between her legs, thrusting his filthy fingers into her, as she squirmed and thrashed about. She tasted blood from where she had bitten her tongue.

‘Mm …so soft,’ Brian moaned vilely, as he roughly fondled Matilda, evidently enjoying her struggles. He bit into her breasts, leaving bloody teeth marks on pale flesh. He groaned and panted over her, ripping and tearing into her like a person possessed. Some part of Matilda’s mind refused to believe this was actually happening and she would wake up to find it was all a nightmare. Matilda was weak and beyond disgust; she needed to escape or die. She closed her eyes and desperately wished she could just disappear.

Suddenly Brian let out an ear-piercing yell and Matilda opened her eyes to see him being flung across the room, where he landed in an untidy heap on the floor. Matilda thought Mark had finally come to her rescue. She was not actually thinking straight – she just watched in amazement. Again, Brian was dragged up and thrown with great force, headfirst into the slab-wall. He slid down and failed to get back up again. Matilda slowly struggled to a sitting position, not really understanding what had just taken place and as she looked around the room, she realised Mark could not have saved her; his bedroom door was still closed and his music was blaring. There was no-one else there at all, except for Matilda and the now unconscious Brian.

Matilda lingered on the floor in a dazed state, attempting to slow her breathing to a more normal level, while struggling to fix her clothing. The only thing she could hear was the loud thudding of her racing heart. She felt completely numb and ached all over. She could still smell Brian on her and felt she might never be clean again. Her skin was crawling and she was not able to stop shaking. Hot and cold chills consumed her body. She passed out and found herself somewhere else.

She was back in that other world again. She knew this place, but it was all very vague, as if from an old memory. A green meadow, with beautiful wildflowers, birds singing and the man, the one in the red coat. She could not quite put it all together, but she was able to almost taste his scent. In this strange instance Matilda had a sense of clarity that he was the one who has just saved her from Brian. Who was he? Why did she feel such a strong connection to him?

Matilda blinked and in an instant she was back, slumped against the dirty old couch in Mark’s lounge room. She had no idea how long she had been gone, although it only felt like a few minutes. Brian was still in a heap on the floor, near the wall. Although she felt an increased urgency to leave before he woke up, Matilda went over and spat on the piece of scum, wishing that he would never wake up. Not so tough now, she thought. Realising that Mark might come out of his bedroom at any moment, Matilda departed as quickly as she could.

In her state of turmoil, Matilda kept on walking, not looking back. Staring straight ahead she did not realise how far she walked until she found herself standing in front of her house. She could feel her heart pounding heavily through her chest. She felt violated and ashamed; somehow she felt it was her fault and could not even think of telling anyone. She had no-one to talk to about something like this, anyway. Matilda thought of her mother – although she would have been horrified, Matilda would have found solace in her mother’s arms. She would