Big Sky Eyes

By Sawyer Belle

When Mackenna fell in love, it was for the first and last time, but she'd be damned before she ever let the lucky fellow in on it. What began as a beloved summer job in the bewitching Montana mountains grew into an aching heart that spanned her college years as she watched the one man she desired more than anything in the world want every woman but her.

Brent was the first to admit that he was roughshod and rigid because he went through a lot of effort to make himself that way. It was the only way to shield himself from everything he could never have. Then, she walked into his life with the optimism and zest of youth and he couldn't help but cling to everything good in her. An unfailing friend through the bends of life, she was the one person he never felt good enough for, and the only one he could never let go.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Sawyer Belle
• Release date: Sep 19, 2013
• ISBN: 9781301039876

Sawyer Belle

I'm a thirty-something wife, mother and hopeless yarn-spinner. I believe in good food, good friends, good wine, and good stories. I'm not trying to teach you something. I'm trying to entertain you and reinforce that fable that we all want so desperately to believe in: the triumph of good over evil and the undiminishing power of great love.

Book preview

Prologue

The ice cubes were a glossy, golden color as he held the tumbler aloft and tilted it back and forth in the low-lighting of the bar. Actually, bar was a bit too modern word for this place. It was a relic from the nineteenth century that could be described as nothing more than wooden. Wooden and weathered, just like the men who drank there. The running joke was that if the regulars of The Shed were not such pricks themselves they might actually feel the splinters that they sat on. Such was the company in this cold Montana town.

The bartender took his cue from the raised glass and refilled it with the dark amber rot gut so many switch to once their taste buds numb enough to distinguish between top shelf and well. For Brent, whiskey was whiskey, and it only served one purpose: to wipe out any emotion and replace it with a warm and brilliant blur. To Brent, whiskey was not for sipping, for savoring or any other pretentious use. There was a reason it burned you through.

So when Ty found him deep into his cups at a bar he never went to, drinking a drink he never drank happily, he sidled onto the stool beside him and ordered the same. There they sat, drinking in quiet solidarity until Brent ground his teeth together in frustration.

I hate when you do that, Ty, he said before raising his glass to his lips.

What’s that, Brent?

Sit there all smug and sure that if you just keep your mouth shut long enough, I’ll bare my soul to you or something.

In answer, Ty took a sip and lightly smacked his lips together. He kept his gaze fixed forward and said nothing. Brent stared hard at his friend’s profile for a long moment before he snorted and shook his head.

Suit yourself, Ty, he said with mild disgust. I didn’t come here wanting to talk to anybody and I didn’t ask you to join me. If you think I’m going to make some big confession or something just because you’re here now, you’re wrong pal.

He received no reply, fueling his drunken anger.

What the hell are you good for anyway? Brent continued. "You are the worst conversationalist. You know, if you want to talk with someone, you actually have to talk."

Ty took another silent sip.

You’re a son of a bitch, you know? Brent sputtered, knowing full-well that his rebellion was crumbling. Fine! You want to sit quietly? I’ll keep my mouth shut, but just do me a favor. Finish your drink and get the hell out of here, will ya?

Ty tipped the glass and emptied it into the back of his throat.

Finally, Brent muttered. Now go.

But Ty lifted his glass and caught the attention of the bartender. Another if you please, Keep.

Brent huffed and once both of their glasses were full, he lowered his forehead to a balled fist where it rested on the counter. He pinched his eyes shut and heaved a defeated sigh. He couldn’t see it, but he knew that Ty’s straight mouth had now tilted into a triumphant and lopsided grin. This was their way. They had been friends since childhood. They were similar in the ways that mattered and exact opposites in the ways that best suited. Brent knew he’d never find a finer friend, and Ty felt the same.

Brent raised himself and propped his elbows on the bar so he could rub the alcohol from his eyes with drunken fingers. He grunted and felt instantly remorseful for his tone and words. The man was the only friend he’d ever had. Well, not the only one.

Ah, hell, Ty, he said. It’s about Mackenna…

Chapter 1

3 years earlier

Washoe Valley, Nevada

Mackenna scratched the furry ears of her golden retriever as he rested his head on her lap. She had been packed for three days and as she sat on the window seat of her room, staring out at her parents’ twenty-acre ranch rolling in an emerald carpet into the shadows of the Sierras, the thought occurred to her that she had no right to be so blessed, or so happy. She smiled as she spotted her favorite chestnut mare grazing among the herd in the pasture.

With the institution of high school behind her, post-graduation life dawned full of promise. Her fall college courses had been selected and paid for. The journey toward becoming a veterinarian was set to begin. For one last summer, though, she and her best friend, Kelly McCrae, would spend their days working in Montana at The Slanted S, the dude ranch owned by Kelly’s family.

During the previous four summers the pair had enjoyed all that big sky country has to offer: long days on horseback, nights beneath the stars and pine silhouettes, campfire cookouts and the achiness earned of a hard day’s work. The girls had always loved it and spent their tedious high school days looking forward to summer.

Mackenna sighed contentedly as she stared out of the window. Her mother, Helen, shouldered a bag of grain as she walked along the white fence toward the stables, cooing to the horses. One by one, the animals jerked their heads up and pricked their ears, at once noticing both the time of day and the bag slung over their caretaker’s shoulder. They answered her coos with a chorus of whinnies and made their way toward the stables, bobbing their heads as they went.

She was grateful for the upbringing her parents had given her. It was on this lush plot of land that she gained the knowledge and love of animals, mainly horses. Her mother, a large-animal vet, offered training and rehabilitation services and before she could even walk, Mackenna was placed on the bare back of any four-legged creature that would tolerate her. She had always known that she would follow in her mother's footsteps. It was the only thing she ever wanted to do.

A car pulled onto their long driveway and inched its way toward the house. She knew it instantly as Kelly’s beat-up blue Civic. Mackenna stood and glanced at herself in the mirror. Her honey-colored hair, which usually brushed the tops of her shoulders when down was swept back into a tiny nub of a ponytail just above her neck. A few thin strands curtained a face she found far too round, and she pushed the little hairs up under a red bandana she had folded into a headband and tied around her head.

She used the pad of her forefinger to wipe away a bit of smudged mascara beneath her lower lashes. Her eyes were bright, blue and by far her best feature. She frowned at the recent pudginess of her cheeks as she sucked them in to form a fish face. She had put on some extra weight during her last year of high school, a fact she found depressing but unavoidable.

She had worked endlessly at her studies to graduate a year early. Kelly was a grade higher and not only did Mackenna want to walk with her friend, but she wanted to get started on earning her degree. Unfortunately, all of the extra time required to expedite her graduation cost her precious time working on the ranch and the effects of her idleness showed themselves in her face, her hips, and the most upsetting to her, her backside.

With a sigh and a soft shrug, she forgot about her physical flaws and grabbed her duffel, tossing it onto her shoulder as her mom had the grain. She bounded down the stairs and out the front door. Helen was already there, laughing and chatting with Kelly. Mackenna tossed her bag in the car and jumped into her mom’s open arms, each wishing the other a safe and happy summer with promises to email and call often.

Tell Dad bye for me, Mackenna said.

Sure thing, honey. The girls got back into the car and buckled their belts, waving their arms out of the open windows as Kelly maneuvered the car around. Call me when you land!

I will, Mom!

Mackenna folded her arms on top of the lowered window and leaned her face out of the car and into the early morning breeze. She closed her eyes and let those stubborn strands of hair free themselves of her bandana and whip across her nose and cheeks. She breathed in deeply the scents of horse hair and hay, of wet weeds and exhaust. Of home.

You all right, kid? Kelly called across the sounds of wind and radio.

Mackenna smiled brightly at her redheaded friend.

I’m perfect, she said, and she really meant it.

Four hours later, their plane touched down in Missoula and the pair made their way across the tiny airport and out to the parking lot, where a familiar and friendly male face smiled up at them beneath a white Stetson cowboy hat. Kelly shrieked and took off at a run, dropping her bag on the concrete before throwing herself into her cousin’s embrace. He chuckled at her enthusiasm and squeezed her tightly with a grunt.

I was hoping it was you picking us up, Ty, Kelly said.

Well, your wish came true, Red, he answered. And Mackenna! he exclaimed as he looked over his cousin’s shoulder at Mackenna waiting shyly. Get over here, girl, and give us a squeeze!

She obeyed and squealed with laughter as he lifted her off her feet with the effort of the hug. It’s good to have you guys back!

It’s good to be here, Mackenna replied.

Ladies… Ty turned sideways and gestured with his hands toward the twenty-year-old rust-covered Chevy truck. Your chariot awaits.

I’m surprised this thing hasn’t bitten the dust yet. Kelly said in mock astonishment.

Rust before dust, Red.

Hmm…I don’t think the same can be said of your jeans, Ty, Kelly said, looking the faded patchwork pants up and down. You’ll be able to make a quilt out of those soon.

Waste not…

Wed not, Kelly finished.

Ouch! Mackenna supplied with a laugh. Leave the poor guy alone, Kell.

It’s okay, Mackenna, Ty said. I happen to be very pleased to tell my dear cousin how wrong she is. Fact is, I’ve got myself a fine female just dying to meet you guys back at the ranch!

Really, Ty? Kelly asked, pleased.

Yep, he answered proudly. So, if you don’t mind, let’s continue this chat on the road. The next hundred and twenty miles aren’t going to drive themselves.

They shuffled in and the next two hours passed pleasantly in story-swapping. Ty was seven years older than Mackenna, and six years older than Kelly, but the three had always gotten along swimmingly during their summers together. By the time they had abandoned the highway for the dusty, rutted road that led to The Slanted S, they were all equally caught up on each other’s comings and goings of the past nine months.

Mackenna stared out of the window, smiling softly to herself as she took in the familiar view of the unspoiled and breathtaking beauty of the Rocky Mountains of Montana. It was the most beautiful country she had ever been in, with peaks jutting high enough to pierce the clouds. The forests and meadows blended together in a green so deep that a person could barely tell where one began and the other ended. The air was clean and clear and made her lungs cold to breathe it. Wildflowers sprouted up, streaks of vibrant color, their blossoms stretching toward the vast sky with its bold, yellow sun.

As the old Chevy crested its last hill, Ty eased onto the brake to allow the two a moment to take in the sprawl of the ranch below. Mackenna leaned onto the dashboard and gasped.

It’s bigger than last year! she exclaimed. You’ve added, what, six more cabins? And another corral, and you’ve expanded the pasture!

Ty nodded and grinned proudly.

Yep. We’ve been busy since you two left.

Business must be really good then.

Oh yeah. Ever since the folks hired that company to advertise, we’ve doubled in business. Had to buy another twenty horses.

Well, let’s get down there, Ty! Kelly exclaimed. I want to see it all up close.

You guys must have had to hire a bunch of new people this year, Mackenna said once the truck was rolling again.

Not really, he answered. We didn’t end up with as many steers as we had hoped. So, we just took five guys from the cattle work for the summer here on the dude.

Hmm, anyone I know? Kelly asked.

Maybe… he paused thoughtfully. You remember my old buddy, Brent?

Brent Thompson?

That’s the guy. He’s helping out on the dude this summer.

Hmph, she said with a snort. You mean he is actually going to lower himself to spend the summer with the city slickers? From what I remember, he was a bit of snob that way.

He has nothing against city folk, Ty defended. He’s just a hard worker and he doesn’t see the point of playing tour guide. He doesn’t consider that real work.

So, how’d you get him to work on the dude?

I didn’t, Ty answered. His boss told him to.

You mean your dad?

No, Ty answered with a grin. I mean his mom.

I guess that’s the benefit of your families being friends, Kelly concluded with a laugh.

I guess…

The conversation ended with perfect timing as Ty parked the truck in front of the main lodge where the family stayed and shared breakfasts with the guests. Ty’s mom pushed the thin screen door open so hard that it smacked against the wood behind it. She looked every inch like Annie Oakley with thick, broken-in boots, long legs covered in jeans and leather chaps, and her red and green plaid shirt tucked into her belt. Her throat was hidden behind a ruffled red bandana. Her long black hair was tied into a thick braid and a black cowboy hat sat beneath a film of dirt on top of her head.

She smiled brightly and clapped her hands with a chuckle as she came toward them.

My girls! she exclaimed as she wrapped her arms around them both. My girls are back! And thank God, too. We could use some more estrogen around here.

It’s good to be back, Aunt Bev, chirped Kelly.

You look more beautiful than ever, Bev, Mackenna added.

Oh, you hush, Bev hissed at Mackenna. I’m as old and dusty as the road that brought you here, but you girls…well…I guess I shouldn’t be calling you girls anymore. She stepped back and fastened a hand onto each girl’s chin. You’re beautiful ladies now.

Her eyes began to glisten with emotion and Ty rolled his eyes before slamming the truck door and filling his hands with the girls’ bags.

Come on, y’all, he said. The sooner you get settled, the sooner you get working.

He walked past the three females, who were ignoring him thoroughly, and headed into the house. Bev squeezed Mackenna’s upper arm and smiled.

Congratulations on graduating a year early, she said. Your folks must be so proud.

Thanks, Mackenna answered. They’re really looking forward to…

"Oh…my…God, Kelly’s hypnotic tone broke through the conversation and Mackenna and Bev followed the path of her eyes as she continued. Who is that?"

Mackenna had the same thought as her gaze fastened on the sweat-slicked back of a beautifully muscled man chopping wood not far off. He wore blue jeans like everyone else around, but had stripped down to a white tank top that hugged his form the way Kelly wanted to. From behind, they could see that he had shoulder-length dirty blonde hair, but that most of it lay hidden beneath a red bandana that had been wrapped around the top of his head like a biker.

Every sinewy muscle bulged in his arms as he continually raised the axe over his head and brought it swiftly down to cleave a log in two. Then, he’d bend over to replace the wooden casualty with another, and his denim Levis did exactly what they were meant to. Mackenna smiled appreciatively and then amusedly as she noticed Kelly nearly salivating at the sight. Bev saw, too, and locked humorous eyes with Mackenna.

You oughtta remember him, Kelly. That’s Ty’s best friend, Brent, Bev answered.

"That’s Brent?" she exclaimed.

Chapter 2

Brent knew the Chevy was approaching long before it made it to the top of the hill. The way Ty drove, he threw clouds of dust that could be seen for miles. When the truck finally parked in front of the house, he had no interest in its passengers. Ty had told him that the two of them would be wrangling the horses, instructing the guests and running the trail rides for the summer along with Ty’s cousin Kelly and a school friend.

Great, Brent had drawled. "Babysitting tourists and teenage girls. Just what I had planned for my summer."

Oh, shut up, Ty had replied. You didn’t plan anything for your summer, Brent, because you are way more boring than you think you are.

That comment had indeed shut him up. Shut him up and pissed him off. So he’d grabbed an axe and was well into chopping enough wood to last through the whole summer and most of fall. He couldn’t believe what he’d be forced to endure. He remembered Ty’s cousin from when she had been out to visit during Christmas three years ago. She had been fifteen then and the unashamed owner of every annoying teenage habit in existence. Brent had been twenty-one and found it almost intolerable.

He heard the rising female voices behind him followed by their squeals and cackles and he shook his head with a roll of his eyes. How would he ever survive the season?

Brent! he heard Bev’s call. Put down that axe and come on over here and say hello to my gals!

It was the last thing Brent wanted to do, but he would never disrespect Bev, so he stuck the axe blade into the tree stump, grabbed his flannel shirt and flung it over his shoulder and obeyed. From his distance, they looked like two normal teenage girls, but he immediately noticed a shock of curly red hair on fire in the fading sunlight. The other girl appeared to be a blonde, so he knew the redhead had to be Kelly.

A wave of surprise washed through him. The pestering runt had grown up.

And filled out.

Tremendously.

He definitely noticed the full and ruby red lips breaking into a wide smile as he approached.

Mackenna was the first to admit the difficulty in deciding which view of the man was the best: the back or the front. A shadow of stubble covered the lower half of his face framing firm and full lips kinked into a haughty grin. Like the rest of his body his face was bronzed from long days in the sun, highlighting the lightness of his bright blue eyes. The muscles of his torso were so big and taut that she wondered how his tank top remained intact.

She knew she was gawking and so shyly averted her eyes. They fell onto his hands as he wiped them clean on his jeans. His fingers were long, strong, and she’d bet anything that they were beautifully calloused. She forced herself to swallow down the tiny flutters working up from her stomach to her throat just as Brent stopped in front of them.

Well, well, well, he mused arrogantly, crossing his arms over his chest. Can this really be the teenage brat I met three years ago?

Kelly piqued, and her cheeks flushed as brightly as her hair. Mackenna’s own brow wrinkled defensively for her friend.

Couldn’t have been me, Kelly said in tamped down anger. I’ve never been a teenage brat.

Brent laughed. Yep, it was you. I’d remember that red hair anywhere.

Kelly pinched her lips into a thin line, unable to think of a clever comeback.

Don’t worry, Brent brushed casually. I can see that you’ve…ah… he looked her body up and down slowly, grown up quite a bit since then.

The compliment had its intended affect and Kelly’s ire disappeared, instantly replaced with her earlier infatuation. Her flush turned to blush and she smiled demurely out of the corner of her mouth. Mackenna was astonished to watch the stranger play her friend so expertly. He knew it, too, for she also did not fail to notice the triumphant smirk on his face.

Okay, Bev interrupted the awkward silence that had fallen. So, you know Kelly. This, here, is Mackenna, Kelly’s best friend.

Brent turned to her and each looked the other in the eye as he held out his hand for a solid shake that Mackenna returned.

Pleased to meet you, she offered.

Likewise, he returned before he narrowed his eyes in study of her features. You have a very honest face.

She furrowed her brow and answered, And you have a very odd way of speaking to women.

He smiled with a soft chuckle. Is that what you think are you are? A woman?

As much as any other, I imagine.

I suspect every teenage girl feels the same he jeered.

Ty had returned through the door in time to witness the pair’s introduction and he shook his head disapprovingly at his best friend.

Jesus, Brent, he admonished. Can you remember your manners, please?

Oh, don’t worry about me, Ty, Mackenna offered nicely. Brent is just pleased to have a two kindred spirits here.

Brent raised a questioning eyebrow at her. Kindred spirits?

Well, sure she returned brightly. "With us two kiddies here, you won’t be burdened by the great difficulty it so obviously is to act your own age."

Bev chuckled once before biting her bottom lip to stifle the rest, but Ty let his full laughter rumble from the depths. Brent’s features remained unreadable but for what Mackenna determined was a tiny hint of humor lighting his eyes as they locked onto hers.

"Come on, kids, Bev said. Supper’s been waiting on you."

As Bev and Kelly led into the house, Ty followed. Mackenna took one step before Brent’s voice stopped her.

So, you’re saying I’m immature? His tone was challenging and teasing all at once. Mackenna turned back toward him and cocked her head to the side. She smiled sweetly with a feigned innocence and batted her eyelashes before she spoke.

I also have an honest tongue.

With that, and one eyebrow spiking as mockingly high as his, she turned and entered the house, leaving Brent chuckling good-naturedly and genuinely amused.

Bev McCrae was accomplished in every way that a Montana rancher’s wife should be. She could rope and ride. She never balked at blood or blemish. She was thick and strong, wild and just plain good through and through, and no one had ever cooked a better beef stew. She would tell you so herself. As the entire McCrae family gathered to fill their bowls with it, Kelly was busy locking arms and elbows with all manner of cousins.

Greetings flew across the room to Mackenna as well and she felt quite at home as she filled a ladle and emptied it into her bowl. Brent was soon beside her, standing so close that she could feel his body heat meddling with hers.

So, he began, quietly speaking only to her. You left me out there thinking that I ought to just call a truce now and be done with it.

Oh, but it'd be so much more fun to cut each other down all summer long, she returned with sarcasm. You certainly proved that you are quite capable of that.

Well, truth be told, that show out there was more for Kelly’s benefit.

Mackenna laughed. Oh, please. That show was for your benefit and yours alone. She scrunched her face and puffed her chest in a caricature of him and said in a deep, mocking voice, "No woman can refuse me….even after I insult her."

Brent laughed loud and long. His ego wanted to be offended. It begged him to stomp away, but the rest of him knew her to be so right that he couldn’t help but laugh.

"You do have an honest tongue," he relinquished and Mackenna seized the opportunity.

Oh yeah, what the hell kind of line is that anyway? she asked. "You have an honest face? I mean, what does that mean? That’s like saying ‘Hmmm, you’re not pretty, but I can’t really insult you, so what should I say about you? Oh yeah, you have an honest face.’ I mean, really? Come on!"

It wasn’t a line, Brent defended. I meant it. I mean everything I say.

Everything? she asked disbelievingly.

Well, except for when I’m drunk. I don’t really know if I believe half the stuff I say when I’m drunk.

Noted, she quipped. And you’re not drunk now?

Not hardly, he chuckled, filling his bowl with stew.

So, then I’m to assume that what you said about Kelly out there is what you meant to say?

What? That she was a teenage brat when I met her? Or that she has grown up since then?

I mean what you said with your eyes, she answered, stopping Brent in his tracks.

And what did I say with my eyes? he asked with measured curiosity.

You said, quite clearly I might add, something to the effect of ‘She’s toast. I got this one.’

Brent’s mouth nearly fell open. She was right. Kelly was so readable and predictable. It didn’t take a genius to see the lust in her eyes, indeed in her entire face, as he’d approached. With only two sentences spoken to her, he thought the very thing that Mackenna had recognized: that Kelly would be putty in his hands if he so wished it. Something in Mackenna’s tone in pointing it out had made him feel guilty and ashamed.

His failure to respond was confirmation enough for Mackenna and she determined right then and there that she did not like him and she shook her head with a sigh. What’s more, she felt an inherent responsibility to protect Kelly from his advances, and since she possessed both an honest face and honest tongue, she told him so.

Look, Brent. I’ve known the McCraes for most of my life, especially Kelly and Ty. Now, Ty says you’re his best friend so there must be more to you than what I’ve seen so far, but Kelly is my best and dearest friend. She falls for guys easily, and she gets her heart broken easily. So, if you can’t respect your ties to the McCraes and keep away from her, know this: if you pursue her, she will fall for you, and I don’t want to see her hurt again by someone just after a fling. I also don’t want anything to ruin this wonderful Montana escape that she looks forward to every year.

Brent stared, slack-jawed, as he battled between angry and…well…really angry. This girl, this teenager, had assassinated his entire character based off of twenty seconds of flirtation. For crying out loud, he had flirted with Kelly, not propositioned her. He had done what every other hot-blooded man does in testing the limits of his influence with any female he is physically attracted to. Where was the affront in that? He hadn’t planned on pursuing Kelly. He had just wanted to know what sort of challenge she would be if he’d wanted to.

Well, Mackenna, he said tightly. "I thank you for assuming the worst of me, but your warning is wasted. Not only do I value my friendship with Ty more than some fling with his cousin, but girls don’t interest me."

He stormed off in such haste that Mackenna felt sorry for offending him and she fought to reassure herself that she had guessed his intentions correctly. She turned to join the family and meet the woman Ty had boasted of.

Mackenna, this is my beautiful Leslie, Ty introduced.

Yes, she is! Mackenna exclaimed, shaking the woman’s hand. She was tall and Nordic looking with long, thick blonde hair and bright, round green eyes. Mackenna instantly thought she had the regal look of a goddess.

It’s nice to finally meet you, Mackenna, Leslie chimed after a laugh. I’m looking forward to spending the summer with you and Kelly.

Me, too, Mackenna answered. I’ve been looking forward to this all year.

Chapter 3

Mackenna had been dreaming an odd dream as her subconscious sorted through the experiences of the previous day. She replayed her meeting of Leslie, and how lovely she had turned out to be, but her mind gave her the head of a talking daisy, which no one in the room seemed to find interesting.

She dreamed of Kelly propped up on the twin bed next to hers in the loft, her red curls bobbing up and down as she spoke excitedly of Brent. Mackenna had tried to talk her out of her scheme to seduce him, but found that her dream-mouth was made of a metal that she could not move and so she resorted to banging her head against the wooden walls methodically. It made a loud thumping sound and as Kelly’s voice began to fade in the background, the thumping grew louder, spaced out evenly until Mackenna’s eyes finally fluttered open. The thumping carried on, plucking at her ears until she sat up and went to the window to investigate.

Brent was there, exactly where she’d first seen him the day before, doing exactly what he’d been doing then: chopping wood. She wondered that no one else had been woken by the heavy sound of his falling axe. Dawn was approaching enough that the sky was a deep purple, but there was no sun to speak of. She dressed in her jeans and a long-sleeve flannel shirt,