In Death Do We Care

By Rob Mallett

The story Prologue starts with Ron as a child out in the backyard with his babysitter. He learns a lesson from her that day that he will carry through life.

Then about fifteen years later...

Ron met Jenna when she showed up at his motorcycle shop and everything was fine, for a while. It didn’t take long for Ron to realize this was not a match made in heaven but somehow they still got married. Jenna’s lifestyle always bordered on destructive and she was determined to drag Ron into it and down to her level. He tried to resist but felt the pressure as he started to lose his way.

Kayla was there when the twins were born, a relative of the family through marriage and soon she became part of the household. She was young, but not so much younger than Ron that he didn’t notice her.
One night he opened up to her while she slept, telling her about all the things Jenna was putting him through, not knowing she heard every word and that was the start.

At first it was a friendship but eventually it grew into something much, much more.

Kayla had her ways to keep Ron alive inside and out and she knew how to beat Jenna at her insane games, even if her ways were a little crazy too.

Jenna’s world of sordid sexual practices and mind numbing drugs drew her in and her bad habits grew worse and worse until the inevitable happened and Ron and his new ally, Kayla, found themselves in a world they never knew they could enter; and they were changed forever good or bad.

Both Ron and Kayla realize that Jenna was caught in her world, a victim of herself and those around her and feel a caring for her they didn't think was possible

The two become cold, calculating sleuths, determined to find those responsible for Jenna's demise and to exact their own form of justice. Only their love for each other and the knowledge that they are doing what is right can keep them on this side of sanity.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Rob Mallett
• Release date: Feb 27, 2013
• ISBN: 9780988839717

Rob Mallett

Even though I started writing as a child to amuse myself and went on to co-publish a number of works in college, it wasn't until 2002 that I started writing professionally.My creative bent has always been varied through the years but the one thing I have always kept on with is my writing. I am and always will be an artist, whether in the form of a musician, actor, painter or any of a number of directions life has taken me.I write dark romance suspense/thrillers born out of the more negative elements of life... and death. My newest work is In Death Do We Care.Me? I work and live in the mountains of Asheville, North Carolina, sometimes taking a pad and pen (remember those?) and heading up the trails, enjoying nature and finding places to contemplate, take in the beauty and write. Other times I visit the multitude of coffee shops in and around our small city to research material, write, edit, and people watch. Ah yes, I love the sweet smell and taste of fresh brewed coffee. It is a necessity of life in my opinion and it always seems to find a place within my stories.

Book preview

PREFACE

We sat there on the porch steps looking out into the yard. Chloe smiled at me brightly. She had a gentleness about her that always brought ease to me. She looked up and I followed her gaze into the deep blue sky filled with slow moving, fair-weather clouds. I smiled, knowing how she loved to look up at the clouds and see beyond them. She would ask, What do you see in that one? Chloe would wait until I spoke, her patience unbounded, her quest to provoke my curiosity and imagination a challenge to both her and me. The game played out; there was a bus that soon turned into a caterpillar as the cloud morphed.

I wonder if it will turn into a butterfly? I queried her.

Very good! she complemented me.

I sometimes wished she wasn’t so much older than me but then again she wouldn’t have been my teacher and my mentor. She would always be my friend I determined. I tried not to think that she was my babysitter. Oh, how I hated even the name. I surely wasn’t a baby. Heck, I was six years old.

Her eyes met mine as her hands rose up to encompass mine. She may have been all of eight years older but her hands were barely larger than mine. I want to show you something, she said. Chloe instructed me to hold my hands about four inches apart, bending my fingers at the knuckles, touching the ends together, index to index, middle to middle and so forth. Her hands coerced, manipulating my digits like clay into her wanted positions. A diamond space appeared where the index and second fingers all me; and again where the second and third fingers all came together, yet another smaller diamond. The two third fingers and both the fourths brought about the same. Chloe made minor adjustments to bring about a space that rode up along between the middle and third fingers on the right as well as the left. There was a smaller similar space between the third and fourths. After a moment, with her eyes squinted, her tongue slipping slightly out for between her lips she seemed to conclude everything looked perfect.

Now tell me what you’re holding in your hand. Chloe questioned.

This is like the clouds, isn’t it? I questioned back.

She nodded as her smile grew. Now what do you see?

I looked but saw nothing. I took a stab, Air?

Chloe questioned me, You can do better than that.

I refocused, afraid to give up, even more afraid to disappoint Chloe. Just as I could take it no longer, as my eyes lost focus, descending into a blur, I thought I saw a flicker. Little by little the shape formed right there before my eyes. Excitement filled me as my grin stretched from ear to ear. Now I thought, how could I have not seen this before? I looked to Chloe, who returned my gaze with anticipation.

Well? she prodded, her voice rising.

I… I see a … I stuttered.

Yes, yes! she said expectantly.

I see a… a dragonfly. I’m holding a dragonfly! I exclaimed, finally adding a confidence to my last words.

Very good, Chloe voiced with pleasure.

Chloe’s look changed to a seriousness shadowing her expression. As life sometimes brings pain to you, and at some point it very well will, use the strength in this world that I have shown you to find a place where you can rest. When life brings good times to you, use this world of imagination to make it bigger and better.

Chloe’s look had again transformed, softened, as if a thin, white veil floated inches in front of her face.

I will remember all that you have shown me, I said.

And she leaned to me, kissing my forehead with the gentleness of a whisper.

With that I eased back to the distant future and I opened my eyes. To this day I can recover a sense of that pleasure, bringing my hands together. And there each time to my amazement sits a dragonfly, resting within the cradle of my extended fingers. I think it was at this point in my life that my heart was opened up to the endless possibilities of life. I didn’t know what good times and bad lay ahead, but I knew from that moment on there was a way to make the most of either.

CHAPTER ONE

It’s hard to know sometimes what to do and then life slips by and you look back and say, What the hell happened? Why didn’t I just… But then it hits you that it doesn’t matter, you’re here and that’s that.

CHAPTER TWO

I was at the home of the girl I was dating, her name was Jenna. It’s funny cause I almost didn’t go with her at all. I mean, I missed our first date cause I was out with the guys on a motorcycle run to Salisbury Beach. I was supposed to be back on time but well, you know how things sometimes go…

I was going to just say fuck it, until my friend Randy said, Hey, if you’re not going to go out with her, I’m going to ask her.

For whatever reason that pushed me to try one more time; I wish I hadn’t. Thinking back I wish she became Rand’s problem. But I did try again and she became my girl.

CHAPTER THREE

We were spending a quiet night playing cards and sipping on Jack Daniels. Me, I always used a glass, I’m not sure why. I guess it was just different, seemed sophisticated to me. Jenna, on the other hand, drank straight from the bottle. I never drank Jack til I met her, if that tells you anything.

It was getting pretty late when I first heard the commotion outside. It was late fall, and the trees had all lost their leaves; evoking thoughts of death to morbid souls like me. The nights brought with them a chill to these late hours.

The sounds of someone pounding on a car’s hood grabbed my attention as I realized quickly it was coming from right outside in front of the apartment. Then the yelling started.

I heard two distinct voices, both male, Come out asshole, one shouted.

We’re gonna kick your ass slurred the other.

I parted the curtains slightly and looked out to take a look. There was a street light that gave just enough light so that I could see a thin man, a bit shorter than me, wearing faded jeans, a black tee-shirt, an old worn black leather vest and a dusty pair of black biker boots. In his hand I could see a fairly large metal object I quickly decided was a knife. In his other hand he had a bottle of beer. He swayed when he wasn’t leaning against their truck.

The other guy was much larger. About my height, he probably weighed in at about 220 to 230 pounds. Both had beer guts, though the bigger one’s was definitely more pronounced. I knew for some reason this banter was directed towards me and looking back at Jenna, seeing the look on her face, there was no remaining doubt. It’s my ex-boyfriend, she exclaimed.

I said, This is bullshit, eyeing a bat that rested against the wall behind me. With one movement I walked over to it, picked it up as I put down my glass and headed for the door. Jenna got in my way and pleaded with me not to go out there, but I was too pissed at this point to care.

I figured my odds. These boys were out there drinking and were probably pretty drunk. Not hard to deduce if you noted the late hour, the beers in their hands and the slur of their speech. Me, I’d had just a few sips of old Jack and was still pretty sober. I shifted the bat in my hand to get a good grip and slapped it against my other hand a few times.

Jenna pleaded with me.

I said, What do you expect me to do, just ignore them?

Let me talk to them, was her reply.

I was ready to kick some ass. What I pictured in my mind was walking out there, standing tall, bat in hand. Her ex-boyfriend with the knife was the closest. I would just walk up to him at a fast pace and just plow the bat into him, first coming down on his extended arm that held the knife, then coming up quick to his head disabling him as quickly as I could. Then I’d swing around before the other asshole had a chance to react in his drunken stupor and stand before him ready to bash his brains in. I’d never lost a fight in my life and I wasn’t about to start now. Yeah I’d give a moments chance for him to pick up his friend and make a run for it. If not, I was ready to take him down hard.

The thought did occur to me: But why; because I was dying to pit myself against these two halfwits for a woman I was just beginning to know that seemed to get drunk way too much?

She did say she was just ‘seeing’ me. I tried to tell her right from the beginning that I like one-to-one relationships. But for now for some reason, when it came down to it I turned to her and reluctantly told her to do what she wanted, like it didn’t matter to me.

Maybe this was when the backing down started, but more about that later.

I guess the guy outside didn’t like to share either; at least we had that in common. Jenna went out while I stood there shaking with fury. I couldn’t hear what she said to him but whatever it was; he soon put away the knife as the big guy walked over by the truck.

I relaxed my grip on the bat but remained prepared to set out to cause damage. Soon he took out a cigarette, along with one of those refillable lighters. He struck the flint wheel several times before sparking a flame. He lit his cigarette as he glared over my way.

My thoughts were, I should kick the eva-lovin shit out of them, but I let it go. Soon he walked to the truck and Jenna headed toward the house.

One thing I knew: These two were now my enemies. For their sakes I best not see them again. How could I know then that this was only the beginning of the troubles he would bring my way?

Jenna came in as they drove away. She grabbed the bottle of Jack, took a long, hard gulp til it was almost empty, took me upstairs to the bedroom and let herself fall back onto the bed and lay there beckoning me to release my frustrations within her. It wouldn’t strike me for quite some time that she always had to be at least half-way drunk to let me lay down with her.

CHAPTER FOUR

Two months later, while I sat at Jenna’s kitchen table, a knock rattled the front door. I could see the door from where I sat as well as who was on the other side. Jenna saw too as she looked past me. She also saw my muscles tighten as I gripped my cup of coffee.

She said, Its ok. He was just drunk the other night. You stay here; I’ll just be a few minutes. She went to the door opening it without hesitation.

He asked her if they could talk, glancing my way. Then he added, Alone?

Jenna let him in, directing him up the stairs.

I just sat there nursing my coffee for a few minutes; I couldn’t concentrate on anything else. I could hear muffled voices bantering back and forth, occasionally making out the words or hearing Jenna telling him to shush.

I caught what sounded like him saying, …if you love your dog… Then things got quiet; that was worse than hearing them.

The moments went on slowing as they progressed. Once in a while I would think I heard a sound; my muscles were tensing again. Something wasn’t right, I could sense it. Then I heard it, a familiar sound I knew. There was a squeak of springs coming from the bed, just once then again. I tried not to panic but something inside me wouldn’t let me stop. Then a rhythm rose from a movement going back and forth. It took a while to understand what was going on. I guess because it was the last thing I wanted to believe. I knew that sound because I’d made it myself many times. It was the sound of two people fucking on the bed. Back and forth, squeak, squeak…

Part of me wanted to go up and cause damage, but what if I’m wrong. I knew I wasn’t but still… I had to think that it was possible. Another part of me wanted to just walk out the door. I was so confused I didn’t know what to do.

I said to myself: Not again! Referring to almost every woman I’d been with in my life. What did that say about me?

I got up from my chair, coffee still in hand and went to walk, but it seemed my feet wouldn’t move. I just stood there. It was probably only a few moments, but if later asked I would have said far, far more. I forced myself to the bottom of the steps. From that vantage point there was absolutely no doubt as to what was going on.

My mind decided to venture up, then the creaking stopped. I paused once again. There were hurried movements, the deed was done. What use to intrude at this point? I felt angry but beaten, wanting to rage and then cry, like a man wanting to run but being blind. Thoughts were racing through my head but the numbness would not let me focus on any one of them.

Murmurs returned and I stepped back to the center of the living room. Slowly they descended the stairs. Jenna saw me first but quickly looked away not even able to look me in the eye. And then him! He came down strutting step after step; seeing me, he gave a leering smile. It was a look meant to say to me, I just fucked your woman right under your nose and there’s not a damned thing you can do. He left without too much fanfare, having done what he set out to do.

When the door closed, a fog blanketed the room with a quietness that shouldn’t be found outside the depths of a miles deep cave. Then all at once, Jenna started babbling; no there weren’t any tears. She said how he wanted some of his stuff.

I thought, well then, why didn’t he have anything in his hands when he left? I was going to say it out loud but what good would it do. It was obvious she’d just lied.

I’m not quite sure what happened next. I think I gave up my coffee for a beer.

I thought, she must know. How could she do this to me? What’s funny is the next morning I was still there.

I needed to forget so I just did or at least I put it to the back of my mind. I always said I would never let that happen again. When I caught my first long-term girlfriend in bed with another guy, I walked, I ran, drove away like a maniac at 110 mph and I never looked back. Did I get used to it?

Some years later when Kiki cheated on me with my best friend at the time, I walked at first but then I came back after a few days.

I guess I was, without realizing it, letting those situations break me down ever so slowly; letting a little piece of me be stolen each time, setting me up for this moment and whatever would happen in the future. I didn’t stand up for myself. Would I ever be able to again?

I would say over and over, I should have walked, I should have walked…

It obviously wasn’t all bad. I started drinking a lot more. I was one to drink beer or wine, maybe a shot of tequila once in a while and more likely to smoke pot. Yeah, when we were young we drank hard liquor, mostly flavored brandy because it was easier to conceal, easier getting someone to buy and of course it was cheaper.

We went out dancing a lot; I knew a lot of the bands around being a musician myself and we’d go with our friends. Jenna even went out canoeing with me a few times, camping and even climbed a mountain with me once, but I didn’t get the feeling she enjoyed that. I knew she didn’t like hiking too much either. She liked going to the bars whether there was live music or not. Many times we would meet up with Jenna’s friends, Owen and Molly and a strange fifth-wheel by the name of Coop.

CHAPTER FIVE

Jenna and I pulled up to Owen and Molly’s home, well apartment inside an old New England house, less than a hundred yards from the town’s center. We knocked and walked in as always.

Owen was still in the kitchen and asked, You guys want a beer?

Sure we said.

It was fairly early so we spent some time talking. Owen pointed to a very dead looking cactus that I thought had been doing rather well a few weeks back.

He said, You know I bought that thing because I’m terrible with plants. They always seem to die no matter what I do. I think I’ve got a black thumb or something. It was doing so well. I know you just water them like once or twice a year, right?

I tried to tell him that that was just a myth but I suspected the knowledge would be lost on him so I just smiled amusingly.

We talked for a little while about work and … no just about work; Owen was a bore. Then we talked about what was going on that night.

Then Owen said, Hey, Coop wants to come tonight. Is that ok?

We just nodded.

Why don’t we see if he’s ready? We all got up to go to his place, which was only about 3 or 4 houses away.

Molly yelled from the bedroom as I was almost out the door, Hey Ron, why don’t you stay here and keep me company? They can get Coop, ok?

I’ve actually known Molly for years. We used to work together a number of years back and hung out here and there. Back then we had some of the same friends. Molly is not what I’d call pretty, but there was definitely something cute about her. She was only about five feet tall and was slight of build, which I thought was sexy. When she laughed too hard she would start to snort, which only made her laugh all the more.

I stood in the doorway watching her put on her makeup, making small talk about this and that, telling me how she wasn’t getting enough sex, and stuff like that. I suspected Owen was gay and just didn’t want to accept it.

Molly was just about ready when she noticed a stain on the sweater-shirt she had on and said, Oh shit! I can’t wear this.

She embarrassed me a little and I blushed as she took off her top to reveal a very flimsy bra underneath. She glanced at my reddened face and laughed a little. Why do women always think that’s so cute? Then she reached in back releasing the hooks on her bra, took it off and tossed it into the corner. I couldn’t keep my mouth closed. I definitely wasn’t expecting this. She smiled and was obviously delighted that she had turned me on to such an extent.

She said, If Owen were here instead of you he wouldn’t even bother to look, much less get all turned on.

I said, How could he not? Is he gay? I looked at her in earnest, paying particular attention to her breasts. They weren’t large by any means, but that was ok; they were beautiful to me. They sloped down then curved to end in a nice soft roundness, like half of a drop of water just about to drop from a spout. There was a mild chill that seeped in through the window that had long ago lost its seal. It caressed her nipples, drawing them taunt. To watch them caused my heart to skip a beat and the area between my legs to stir. But what made her nipples stand out like none I’d ever seen was their color; a delicate shade of red that would be at home on a rose. I found the temperature rising as if the sun had come that much closer to me. In my eyes her beauty had escalated forever more from that moment on.

Molly brought her finger up to gently rub them more. She asked if I enjoyed seeing her like this. I was speechless. She said, Good, I’m glad. A moment later she was putting on a new bra and sweater and I was left with a memory that will forever turn me on.

Molly put her arm around mine and led me toward the door. They’ll be here in a moment. I think everyone wants to start off at the pub up the road. You know, I’m glad you find me sexy. It’s good to know somebody does.

I reiterated, How could they not? and she looked deep into my eyes and smiled. Sometimes I wonder if maybe I should have taken on the lifestyle that I found out not too long after was part of Jenna’s way.

We all met outside and headed for the pub. There was no band there, there never is. It was one of those places where old men and women spent their whole evenings and the younger ones like us, went as a starting point.

We bought beers and drinks, talking about the past week. A couple we knew came through the door. I didn’t know them all that well but the rest of the crowd I was with did. I did know that the guy, Joel, refused to go out with any woman, no matter how beautiful, smart or otherwise enticing, unless she was enormously well endowed.

The woman he was with tonight and has been going with for the past few months, fit his conditions quite well. She was just barely eighteen, with dark brown hair. I’m sorry to say, not wishing to fall into a cliché, but when she spoke it was obvious she wasn’t that bright, but she tried to treat everyone kindly, which made her easily likable.

Joel always boasted about his women’s, SIZE and had told us a dozen or more times within the first hour with us, men and women alike, that she had forty-sixes, always adding the double-D. We didn’t need to know the number to know she was indeed so large. Her name was Jacki and she wasn’t the least bit fat but she did have curves where ever one looked.

I felt sorry for her as I think some of the others did too, because Joel wasn’t always very nice to her. In fact, sometimes I thought he was quite cruel. If she said anything that might have been misconstrued as an unintelligent remark he’d be right there to tell her to stop talking if she couldn’t say anything worth saying. Sometimes he’d actually call her stupid. You would just see the change as her shoulder would slowly drop and sadness would come to her face. I knew that feeling all too well growing up. It was a feeling that tried to lessen who you were.

I tried to start a conversation about something she would know. She looked over at me and smiled, telling me with her eyes that she was thankful that I cared and the conversation went on.

I looked around and noticed Jenna was gone. I wasn’t alarmed or anything; it was just an observation; she was probably in the ladies room.

Owen and Molly’s conversation came into focus, like it had been far away, maybe in a different room and slowly drifted in. I turned towards them noticing there was something odd in the way they were looking at me. I brushed it off and joined in, trying to include Jacki, which brought her back to life.

After a few Mics, as usual in a glass, the time passed until I realized Jenna had been gone much too long to have just gone to the ladies room. It seemed just as I spoke the front door opened and Jenna came in. Her hair seemed disheveled and her look appeared out of place, harried, maybe even nervous. I almost said something then the door opened again and Coop walked in too with a similar demeanor lingering in his movements, out of words and with a nervous smile. Then they quickly saddled up to their drinks gulping them down quickly as if to catch up with the rest of us. I let go of the vague awkwardness. I think they were both relieved for that. Owen and Molly seemed to also give off a sense of relief. Did I miss a joke or something?

The night continued on. At some point we all agreed it was time to move on. We walked back to Owen and Molly’s, got our cars and followed each other two towns down the road, to a large bar, with two floors, where there’d be live music and a sizable crowd.

It was packed even outside. Joel lit a joint; Jenna and Owen were the only two that didn’t partake. Soon as we were done we went inside. It was loud with excitement; rock and roll flowed through the crowd. We were surprised to get a couple of tables, because another group were just getting ready to leave; maybe to go outside for a smoke or maybe to move on down the road to another bar. It was too early to think that they were ready to all go home.

Bar hopping was pretty common around here. There was nobody that bothered you, at least here…

The times they are a changing....

One of us, I’m not sure who went up to the bar and bought everyone a first round. For the rest of the night we would rely on the waitresses walking about.

The music sounded good so I asked Jenna to dance. For a moment she was hesitant, then said, Ok.

People here and there seemed to know the others in my group. As the night went on we danced and drank, talked and laughed in between. It was a very good night all around.

I got up one time to go to the john and ran into a couple of guys. I didn’t know them myself but they were friendly enough. The conversation turned to the topic of Jenna.

Are you out with Jenna tonight? they asked.

Yeah, I said, figuring they knew her since she grew up just around the corner.

They went on to tell me, Oh if you’re with her you know you’ll get lucky tonight.

There didn’t seem to be any malice in their voices. It seemed they were just giving me what they thought were the pleasant facts I should know.

Yeah, just feed her some drinks, was their advice. Many of us have been there before. You’ll have fun.

I thought to myself, what have I gotten myself into? Insane ex-boyfriends and I think, no, I know she’s already cheated at least once. Then I thought about what happened earlier; maybe twice (?) I decided.

It started me thinking about earlier this night. Why did Jenna and Coop disappear like that? I shook the thought out of my head.

I didn’t run away like I probably should have; I’m not even really sure why. Maybe I thought that I could change her or that I just refused to believe what I was pretty sure I knew was true.

At the end of the night she was too drunk to drive. We said goodbye to Owen, Molly and the rest of the crowd. They all knew Jenna’s place was just down the road, so with a wave off we went.

When we got home that night I was sure Jenna would pass out. We went right to bed. She took all her clothes off; she slept that way most of time I’d been with her; I was no different. I was ready to sleep, figuring nothing would happen tonight but her hand reached around me and grabbed a hold of me hard. It didn’t take but a moment for me to get hard as she stroked me. She pulled me over on top of her. Not once during all this time did she search for a kiss, no caresses or even a look at me in the eye. She just pulled me inside of her.

The bed started squeaking as I moved back and forth. Some thought deep in the back of my mind made me momentarily winch but in another moment the thought was gone. This was sex, not love; it was quick, not very strong. When I lifted myself from her she was pretty much passed out. She muttered a few words then turned to her side. I lay there quiet with my eyes wide open wondering where all this would lead me. Was this what I had hoped for… for my life?

CHAPTER SIX

I kept my apartment in the city. I didn’t want to give up that refuge. It was like my subconscious mind was trying to tell me something. Maybe eventually I’d listen. For now what was the harm?

Well after a while things changed. Everything seemed to settle down. No more visits from the ex, at least none that I knew about.

She brought me to her father’s home. It was a respectable house in a quiet neighborhood. Jenna said her dad was away and she needed to check the mail and make sure everything was ok. She gave me the grand tour. Jenna didn’t speak highly of her dad; in fact she kind of talked about him with pure contempt barely hidden under her nonchalant demeanor. I never brought up the subject, feeling, when and if she was ever ready to talk about what had happened to illicit such distain, she’d let me know.

As I entered the house I felt as if there were definitely ghosts to be found there. We gravitated towards the basement which was nothing like you’d expect. It was just another floor to the house, all finished in natural woods. There was a beautiful fireplace in what would be described as a large den, couches, chairs, tables, etc. There was even a small bedroom. It was like a guest apartment with its own entryway. Everything looked comfortable, lived in.

Jenna explained, with expressed enthusiasm, This is where we spent most of our time. We partied here all the time. My dad was afraid to come down. He didn’t want to know what was going on.

I got a feeling there was more to this saga, which I would learn all in good time.

We went up stairs to the living room; it was elegant, with its bowed window and chandelier. I sensed a presence at the same moment Jenna began to speak.

This was my mother’s favorite room. No one was allowed in here except when there was company. She continued, "I remember once my mom was entertaining a friend of hers, a state police officer she had known for years. I guess my mom was showing him the house, including my room. I had a pot plant growing in the window that I told my mom, was a False Aralia. So when I got home from school and found them in that room he said to me, Nice False Aralia you have there. At first I thought I was in trouble but then he smiled. I asked him if everything was alright. He said, No problem here. I don’t know. I just came to this room and that memory just popped into my head. I remember seeing him a number of times when I came home from school. He would always be in that room talking with my mom. It wasn’t a common thing back then for a woman, especially a married woman, to have a male friend, but they were always good friends. I can remember that much back as far as I can remember."

I left it at that. I didn’t want to mention what impressions came to my mind.

We moved on up the stairs to the bedrooms where again I knew another ghost still resided. I could see it plainly in Jenna’s eyes; a fierceness that seemed to overtake her, like she was taking every feeling she found to be weak within herself and one by one was putting them aside. Then she gathered herself as we entered what was once her bedroom. I could feel the chill but I wouldn’t find out the story that went with this room for some time. When I did it unfolded like this:

The door to my room opened slowly. My oldest brother came in. I couldn’t have been more than five or six. It was dark except for the light glow coming from a streetlight not far outside my one window. He walked so casually towards me that I didn’t notice at first that he didn’t have any clothes on except for an open robe. I knew that a boy looked different than a girl. My parents often walked around with nothing on. He came over until he stood over me. I could see him plainly as he stood in the available light. I was hidden within the shadows so I pretended to be asleep, but I kept my eyes wide open. At first I didn’t know what he was doing but I sensed something was wrong. He was holding his thing in his hand, that’s what I called it back then, moving it up and down. He put it closer and closer to my face til it was only inches away. He continued doing this for what seemed like forever. Then all of a sudden he squirted something that felt thick like glue, all over my face. All I knew was I didn’t like it. I wanted him to leave right then and soon after he did. It dripped off my nose, into my mouth. I remember saying yuck to myself. I stayed up for half the night hoping he wouldn’t come back. I took a tee-shirt to wipe off my face. Then I got up and went to the bathroom. He came back more often as time went on and started touching me at one point. First he started rubbing my butt. I always just pretended to be to sleep. I had a blanket that I pulled over me to hide. I just wanted him to go away. It grew warmer in my room as the summer approached that year. I had no blanket to hide under anymore. One night he got on top of me. I tried to push him away. He got in back of me, I was turned to my side and he forced his way into me. It hurt, but I didn’t cry. I had a hard time going to sleep after that. I told my parents but I’m not sure they believed me. All my father did was… well the next day he put a lock on my door. He didn’t bother me after that. I would like to say that he only forced his way inside me the one time but it took a while for me to tell my parents. He came back more frequently as time went on.

You know I always felt bad for Jenna after she told me that horrible tale. I had vowed to help her however I could. Later in time it seemed strange to me that we would still go over to Brian’s home, always like nothing was wrong, ever. We would all talk, laugh, go out to eat… There was no real closeness between them, no hugging, or touching in any way, but I would learn that this was their way in her family. It was all a bit strange to me.

Jenna finally left me in her bedroom alone while she checked on a few more things she needed to do for her dad. I felt she had to cleanse the ghosts she had conjured up during this visit and needed time to herself to do so.

I had already known her mother had died some years ago from a brain aneurism, but by the way she had talked about it I was under the impression that Jenna had been a little child when it happened. But after hearing her story today I realized it couldn’t have happened that long ago. It must have happened within the last couple of years.

Something, I don’t know exactly what, a presence, maybe one of these ghosts that have been revealing themselves to me since I got to this house; whatever it was it was directing me towards the closet. It was weird; so strong I felt compelled to do as asked.

The closet was really just a space that ran the length of the house behind the walls where there wasn’t enough room to stand straight, well at least not for me. It was mostly dark but some light seeped in through various little cracks and holes in the wall, near the base or where there were electrical outlets; some light also came in through a vent down at the end. All in all it made for a spooky, horror movie atmosphere, giving me the chills.

It didn’t help that I was hearing this…aaahh; I don’t know; I mean it’s just so hard to pin down. It was like a voice, pale and vague, sometimes seeming to be inside my head yet at other times sounding like a far off whisper; now if that isn’t eerie. But I wasn’t afraid. Something about this sound, this voice if you could call it that was soothing…and it called to me.

I walked in farther and farther one hand feeling along the dusty slats that I guessed gave substance to the walls. My other hand was busy trying to protect my head from hitting the rafters, succeeding only marginally. In the dim light I could see a bulb hanging from a wire and in my distraction, bang! My hand lowered just enough and my head skimmed a beam. Shit! I called out. Fuck preceded that and I think some combination of the two escaped my mouth too.

I momentarily lost my balance, and in my effort to regain my equilibrium I grabbed for whatever I thought would help this cause. I grabbed onto what seemed sturdy at the time, the slats, but soon found that they gave way easily as I looked to see three clutched in my hand.

I was now close enough to reach out and pull the string that dangled from the light and pulled it, startled when it blinded me. I was going to fit the pieces of wood in my hand, back where I ripped them off from but as I went to do so I noticed… something out of place. I could see just a tiny bit of what looked like a book. Getting closer I carefully pulled on it, trying to get a grip. Little by little it gave way as I inched it out. It was unlike any book I’d seen recently. The binder looked like it was made of black leather, old and cracked, giving it an antique appearance.

I examined it and was going to read it but that voice called out again and I found myself looking deeper down between the slats and wall. I thought I saw something, maybe another book. Breaking away more slats I discovered yet another identical book. I kept looking, removing a slat here another there, searching and finding til something let me know I had found them all. It was the voice; it became innate, silent and calm and I just knew that meant I was finished.

There I stood with seven odd books. I found a cardboard box to put them in, then opened one and started to read. I realized quickly that these weren’t books but a series of journals or diaries; then I saw the name, Jacqueline, Jenna’s deceased mother. I read on for what seemed a very long time until I heard Jenna rummaging on the other side of the wall in one of the bedrooms. I took hold of the box containing the books and made my way out, trying not to hit my head again. I put the box with some others we were going to take with us determined to read them at a later time.

I don’t know why I didn’t tell Jenna right away; maybe it was because I wasn’t sure what I would find within the pages and whether at this point it was something Jenna would want to or should bear witness to.

The little I had read in those few minutes intrigued me and started to open my eyes to the total dysfunction this family had hidden, in this case,