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    The Bee's Bayonet
    The Bee's Bayonet
    The Bee's Bayonet
    Ebook171 pages1 hour

    The Bee's Bayonet

    By Edwin Alfred Watrous

    ()

    Read preview
    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherArchive Classics
    Release dateNov 25, 2013
    The Bee's Bayonet

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      Book preview

      The Bee's Bayonet - Edwin Alfred Watrous

      The Project Gutenberg EBook of The Bee's Bayonet, by Edwin Alfred Watrous

      This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with

      almost no restrictions whatsoever.  You may copy it, give it away or

      re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included

      with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org

      Title: The Bee's Bayonet

      Author: Edwin Alfred Watrous

      Release Date: August 22, 2012 [EBook #40560]

      Language: English

      *** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE BEE'S BAYONET ***

      Produced by Greg Bergquist, Matthew Wheaton and the Online

      Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net (This

      file was produced from images generously made available

      by The Internet Archive/American Libraries.)

      THE BEE'S BAYONET

      (A LITTLE HONEY AND A LITTLE STING)

      —CAMOUFLAGE IN WORD PAINTING—

      BY

      EDWIN ALFRED WATROUS

      Author of The Fooliam

      BOSTON

      RICHARD G. BADGER

      THE GORHAM PRESS

      Copyright, 1918, by Edwin Alfred Watrous

      All Rights Reserved

      Made in the United States of America

      The Gorham Press, Boston, U.S.A.

      Dedicated to

      THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA

      CIVILIZATION'S CRUSADER.

      To Thee, My Native Land, America!

      My heart with pride is filled: my lips exult

      Because Thou art my Home—my Fatherland.

      Beneath the Constellation of the States,

      Set in the firmament of fadeless blue,

      I bare my head and hail the Stars and Stripes,

      Proud Emblem of our Unity and Might.

      My Country calls! I give what I possess,—

      All! All I say! and giving thus, regret

      That my poor contribution to thy needs,

      In hours of peril when dark war-clouds loom,

      Is such a paltry thing

      When measured by the debt of gratitude

      I owe for Liberty.

      All that I am and have belongs to Thee.

      Upon thy Altar Fires,

      Where Freedom glows and glorifies Mankind,

      I consecrate

      My flood-tide strength, my substance—life itself!

      And rate not this as sacrifice

      That gives me pleasure to repay

      In this small way

      Thy boon and bounty, priceless Liberty.

      CONTENTS

      PROEM

      If you can find, within, a single line

      To give you pleasure, then the pleasure's mine;

      But if you fail and whine, or josh like Billings,

      You might (I say you might!) get back your shillings.

      But better yet! Bestow this Book of Verses

      On some friend-foe you love with hate and curses,

      And your revenge will be attained thereafter

      For, when he reads it, he will die with laughter.

      And, Cheerful Reader, if this work contains

      A soporific for your bulging brains

      So that you'll rave about it to your neighbors,

      I'll feel repaid for all rebuffs and labors.

      Though Wisdom sometimes borrows, sometimes lends,

      You'll borrow trouble lending this to friends;

      But earn my thanks if, when you've praised or shown it,

      You'll sit upon the lid and never loan it:

      For ev'ry copy sold, thru friends or slapbacks,

      Just puts Mo'lasses on my buckwheat flapjacks.

      And, Critic Friend, who halts Ambition's flight

      And ties the can to Aspiration's kite,

      Pray recollect that when you plied the pen

      And had some stuff accepted now and then,

      Your tales, O! Henry, did not prove inviting

      Or else you'd be no Cynic but still writing.

      BEHOLD A MAN!

      There stands a Man! unyielding and defiant,

      A master Leader, bold and self-reliant.

      He seeks no conquest but his lance is set

      Against the ruthless Despot's parapet.

      Alert and conscious of his strength, his thrust

      Is sure and timely, for his cause is just.

      Invincible, he rallies to his cause

      Those who love Justice and respect the laws.

      To skulking traitors and to spying foes

      He shows no mercy, but his heart o'erflows

      For those oppressed, who live, nay! who exist

      Where arrogance and tyranny persist:

      But, tho distressed by all this human grief,

      He weeps not idly, but compels relief:

      And those he serves by act or speech or pen,

      One Hundred Million freemen, shout, Amen!

      "Safe for Democracy the world must be,

      And all its bondaged peoples shall be free!"

      So spake the Man: America thus voiced

      Its ultimatum, and the Earth rejoiced!

      Intensely human, cast from mortal clay

      In Nature's mould, one epoch-making day,

      Behold a Man! he seems a higher sort,

      Refined with purest gold from God's Retort

      And filled with skill and wisdom, Heaven-sent:

      God bless and keep our peerless President!

      THE JULOGY

      To those who never heard my Songs before,

      And those who have, and want to nevermore,

      This Rhapsody, with all its pithy phrases,

      Has passed the Censors with the highest praises.

      Released by favor of the Board's caprice,

      It takes its proper place—a masterpiece!

      Soft pedal, please! The Knockers are outclassed,

      And Genius finds its recompense at last!

      Whene'er I read about this war-time pelf

      It makes me sick: I can't contain myself!

      The profits on the die-stuffs sent to France

      Make Croesus' wealth a trifling circumstance;

      And what the Farmers get for mules and wheat

      Makes fortunes hitherto quite obsolete.

      In by-gone days the Bards were praised and pensioned

      Who now are at the Front—and rarely mentioned:

      And all these hardships they endure while men

      Who

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