Life According to Brian

Written by B. M. Dawes

Narrated by Jacob Z Klimaszewski

Life According to Brian chronicles forty-four stories of mishap and misadventure of a scale unparalleled in modern man. Disguised in comedy to protect the seriously guilty, the story follows Brian’s escapades traversing the world and captures not only the lunacy of life but the luck involved in avoiding one’s own death.

The guidebook for the mentally impaired includes: poaching, drugs, imprisonment, kidnapping, poisonings, alien hunters, crocodile suicide and much, much more…

The sorry episodes are being played out via a game of chess. God and Charles Darwin, seeking to save mankind, are plotting Brian’s untimely demise. The winner of each play gets to choose the method of death. Constantly interrupted by visiting deities, kings, queens and E.T., the two main players are frustrated in their attempts to have some peace and play the game, with a nice cup of tea and some Mr Kipling cake.

Send the kids away, euthanise the cat, find a comfy chair, pour a pint of the finest whisky…have a reliable psychiatrist on speed dial.

Come inside and enjoy the ride…

• Language: English
• Publisher: Austin Macauley Publishers
• Release date: Nov 4, 2022
• ISBN: 9781398456228

B. M. Dawes

B. M. Dawes was born in Perth, Australia, in 1971, where he first discovered his fear of venomous snakes. This legitimate threat to life would then follow Brian to Zambia from the age of three to six. Escaping not only the marauding bandits and numerous attempts by his loving sister to shorten his already young years, Brian would then flee to Bahrain where he would misadventure throughout his teens. He attended university in Queensland, Australia, where he learnt his trade as a professional drinker and erred on the side of erring. He currently lives in Edinburgh, Scotland, with his long-suffering partner and two loving children, who have a pending life policy on their benevolent dad.