In one of the most frequently quoted aperçus about marriage, Rainer Maria Rilke exhibited a rare wisdom for someone not yet thirty. He wrote: “A togetherness between two people is an impossibility, and where it seems, nevertheless, to exist, it is a narrowing, a reciprocal agreement which robs either one party or both of is fullest freedom and development.” One might add that togetherness is also a fragile agreement, vulnerable to backtracking and rupture: as social animals, we do not seem especially well-suited to having our freedom and development confined, much less stolen – even if its relinquishment is voluntary.
They say it takes two to tango. But it takes two to fight as well: two teams, two countries,
