It wasn’t really the time to be making deals. We were in the middle of the Covid pandemic, I had briefly swapped New Zealand’s gilded cage for the clinical confines of Mum’s English care home and doctors had warned us she might not live to see Christmas. But I wanted to give the most important woman in my life hope – something to live for.
Looking at Mum slumped in a wheelchair, wearing a jovial festive jumper, her brave smile belying the pain in her eyes, I took her hand and made a promise. I told her if she could just fight and get back on her feet – metaphorically, if not physically – then I would get married.
Mum had been waiting for me to tie the knot ever since I emigrated to be with my Kiwi partner2006. In reality, she had probably been waiting for it my whole life. I was now facing the fact she probably wouldn’t be there.
