Esquire

Read Me My Fking Rights

“… nor shall be compelled in any criminal case to be a witness against himself, nor be deprived of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law.”
—FIFTH AMENDMENT TO THE U. S. CONSTITUTION

ONE LATE NIGHT IN 1997, YOUTHFUL DRUG-DEALING me was driving to dinner with a young woman in tow when the police pulled me over for failing, so they claimed, to wear a seat belt. A pair of offcers huffed up on both sides of my Honda with their flashlights beaming, brightness that revealed the not-so-hidden strap I kept under my dashboard for protection. “He’s got a gun! He’s got a gun!” they screamed, ordered us out of my ride, and proceeded to search it, whereupon they found several grams of crack in a baggie bag beneath my seat.

They slammed on handcuffs, stuffed me in the back seat of their squad was, intel he said would make my allbut-assured stern punishment less so.

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