The ScoMo DIARIES
August 24th 2018
I did it! Everything I have ever done has been leading to this point, and I finally did it! As of today, I, Scott Morrison, have become manager of one of the world’s pre-eminent marketing firms: the Australian Federal Government. I know in my heart that I am destined to be the greatest leader this company has ever seen, and so here I present to you, dear reader, my diary. May it inspire younger generations towards the greatness I am destined to achieve and act as a blueprint for future leaders long after I have moved into the private sector.
Before we get to all that, though, I guess you need to know a bit about who I was before I became the boss. My humble beginnings. As far back as I can remember, I always wanted to be an ad man. It was a toss-up between that and being a priest, but I decided on the former because it offered greater variety in the things I got to sell. I had my first taste of the life as a child actor in my youth when I did a commercial for cough drops. There were a lot of great people on that film set, but the ones I looked up to most were the advertising executives. They drank whiskey, smoked cigarettes and had houses in the Shire – Sydney’s crown jewel. They commanded so much respect that people would literally stop talking when they approached and stand there staring, obviously paralysed with admiration.
“When I met the
