STUCK BETWEEN A T-ROC AND A HARD PLACE
THE BOROUGH OF ELMBRIDGE, SURREY.
THAT’S WHO TO BLAME FOR THIS SITUATION.
No, not the fact that I’m currently parked in a pool of brown water, or that the back seats look like a T-Rex has sneezed chocolate milkshake over them – that’s all my doing. Rather, that leafy suburban district south-west of London is responsible for the existence of the ridiculous car I’m in – the Volkswagen T-Roc Cabriolet.
“‘LOOK WHO IT IS! SAFARI BARBIE!’ ONE SHOUTS. I KEEP QUIET”
How? Well, a few years ago, the borough of Elmbridge was identified as the UK’s ‘convertible capital’, with over 5,300 drop tops registered in the surrounding area. See, for some reason, we Brits a cabriolet. Which is quite ironic given we’re famed for grey skies and months of SUVs, with 12 per cent more of the things being sold last year than the one before. Unsurprisingly, it didn’t take very long for some clever clogs somewhere in VW (probably in the marketing department) to take this information and come up with an idea. I imagine the boardroom conversation went something like this: “Y’know the T-Roc? It’s our fourth best-selling car. And those silly Brits love convertibles. They also love small crossover SUVs. So… let’s scalp that son of a bitch and give the borough of Elmbridge what it thinks it wants!”
