Country Life

More fool you

I HAVE set off, as instructed, to the hardware shop to buy tartan paint (and back home again to ask for which clan), bitten into a custard-cream biscuit filled with toothpaste and responded to a telephone message from Ben Dover (although, in fairness, I was very tired that morning). I have also believed media reports about migratory flying penguins, weight-loss socks capable of eating

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