Two Ravens and One Crow: An Iron Druid Chronicles Novella

By Kevin Hearne

Atticus O’Sullivan is back in an action-packed, laugh-out-loud novella from the author of The Iron Druid Chronicles. Two-thousand-year-old Atticus may have outwitted and outfought everyone from Odin to Bacchus, but he’s about to discover that what comes around when you go around messing with gods.
 
Six years into the training of his beautiful apprentice, Granuaile, a large crow swoops down and transforms into none other than the Morrigan, a goddess who insists that Atticus come with her at once. He must leave his apprentice behind, along with his Irish wolfhound, Oberon—and he must also leave his sword. The Morrigan has always taken extreme pleasure in pronouncing the Druid’s mortal danger and imminent doom, so the fact that she won’t reveal the purpose of their journey makes him very nervous. Of course, any time the Celtic Chooser of the Slain drops in unannounced, it’s never good. When she does let slip that she’ll be saving his life in the near future, Atticus is left to wonder . . . will he soon be giving his legions of enemies something to crow about?
 
Includes an excerpt from Kevin Hearne’s Iron Druid Chronicles novel Trapped!
 
Praise for Kevin Hearne and The Iron Druid Chronicles
 
“Celtic mythology and an ancient Druid with modern attitude mix it up in the Arizona desert in this witty new fantasy series.”—Kelly Meding, author of Three Days to Dead
 
“[Atticus is] a strong modern hero with a long history and the wit to survive in the twenty-first century. . . . A snappy narrative voice . . . a savvy urban fantasy adventure.”—Library Journal, on Hounded

• Language: English
• Publisher: Random House Publishing Group
• Release date: Sep 4, 2012
• ISBN: 9780345535436

Kevin Hearne

Kevin Hearne is a high school teacher with a passion for world religion and mythology. His primary agent, Evan Goldfried at Grinberg Literary Management, pulled HOUNDED out of the slush pile and sold it to Del Rey in the US. Del Rey are publishing in May, June, July 2011.

Book preview

Two Ravens and One Crow is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously.

A Del Rey eBook Original

Copyright © 2012 by Kevin Hearne

Excerpt from Trapped by Kevin Hearne copyright © 2012 by Kevin Hearne

All rights reserved.

Published in the United States by Del Rey, an imprint of the Random House Publishing Group, a division of Random House, Inc., New York.

DEL REY and the Del Rey colophon are registered trademarks of Random House, Inc.

This book contains an excerpt from the forthcoming book Trapped by Kevin Hearne. This excerpt has been set for this edition only and may not reflect the final content of the forthcoming edition.

eISBN: 978-0-345-53543-6

Cover design: Gene Mollica

www.randomhousebooks.com

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Contents

Cover

Title Page

Copyright

First Page

By Kevin Hearne

About the Author

Excerpt from Trapped

What would it be like, I wonder, if humans could slobber as freely as dogs? There’s no social stigma for dogs when they slobber and it looks like a lot of fun, so I envy them that freedom. I’ve certainly wanted to slobber at various times—there are situations where nothing else makes sense—but despite having lived for 2,100 years and in many countries around the world, I have yet to find a culture where it’s even mildly acceptable, much less looked upon with approval.

I guess some things will never change.

Despite the universe’s refusal to change enduring truths according to my will, lately I’ve been wishing I could train a Druid in a five-minute karate-movie montage rather than the necessary twelve years. After ten seconds of futile effort trying to solve a problem, the initiate would abruptly improve or learn the lesson and her expression would fill with wonder, and I would award said initiate a cookie or a tight nod of approval. The initiate would bask in the glory of an achievement and then move on to the next difficult challenge for another ten seconds, and so on, until a triumphant swell of music and a slow-motion high-five signaled victory and completion. We would smile the radiant smiles of actors in fast-food commercials, merrily chuckling as we ate enough grease to make our hearts explode like meat grenades.

But training my apprentice, Granuaile, wasn’t like that at all. Shaping her mind for Druidry was rough and monotonous for both of us, yet shaping her body was fraught with peril. The peril was the sort Sir Galahad had faced at Castle Anthrax: stupefying sexual tension.

Every winter solstice, I gave my apprentice an entire wardrobe of loose, shapeless sweats, and she kept buying herself tight, form-fitting outfits to wear in the summer months. I had trained my Irish wolfhound, Oberon, to help me through it and be my Lancelot whenever Granuaile made my jaw drop, which was more often than I would care to admit. She’d go through her kicks and lunges and various stances and build up a sweat, then I’d start thinking about other ways to get sweaty, and shortly thereafter I’d need to be rescued.

Can’t I have just a little bit of peril? I would ask Oberon through our mental link.

he’d say, and then I’d have to give him a snack, which would force me to tear my eyes away from Granuaile and redirect my thoughts into less prurient channels. It might sound silly, but it was self-preservation.

Granuaile picked up on the pattern after a while, unfortunately.

Sensei? she asked.

Yes?

Why are you always leaving about halfway through a workout to give Oberon a snack?

What? Well, he’s a good dog.

Granted, but he’s a good dog all the time, and the only times you interrupt what you’re doing to give him a snack are during workouts.

I reward him sometimes for using big words. And sometimes I reward him for shutting up.

Now would be a good time to shut up.

Deal.

So what did he say just now? Granuaile asked.

I’m sorry, but that’s classified information.

Oberon chuffed, and Granuaile’s eyes narrowed. She knew the dog was laughing, blast him, and now she’d be determined to find out what he thought was so funny.

I was saved by the arrival of an extremely large crow. It spat out Caw! at Klaxon-level volume, landing on top of our trailer. It startled us all, including Oberon, who barked at it a couple of times. The bird’s eyes glowed red and he stopped, tucking his head down and retracting his tail between his legs.

Morrigan? I said.

The red glow faded from the crow’s eyes as she tilted her head and spoke in a throaty rasp, Surprise, Siodhachan. The Celtic Chooser of the Slain would never call me Atticus. The head bobbed once at my apprentice. Granuaile.

What’s wrong? I asked, because the Morrigan did not make social calls. I belatedly realized that I should have offered her refreshment or adhered to some standard of hospitality, but thankfully the Morrigan was too focused on her mission to notice my awful manners.

The crow rustled her wings and announced, We have business to attend to. You will be gone for at least a week but perhaps two. You won’t need to bring anything, not even a weapon. Shift to your bird form and let us be gone.

Wait, wait. I’m going to need more of an explanation than that. Can’t my apprentice come, or my hound?

No. Definitely not. Our business does not concern them.

Oberon said.

I glanced uncertainly at Granuaile, and she shrugged.

You say we’ll be gone two weeks?

At the most. But we must begin immediately. Make haste.

Arguing with the Morrigan would be unwise. Spending at least a week with her—maybe two—would not be any wiser.

I’m doomed, aren’t I?

You’re not doomed, the Morrigan said, and I belatedly remembered that she could read my mind now—or at least hear thoughts that I projected. But you will be if you don’t hurry up.

I turned to Granuaile. Take a few days off if you wish. You’ve earned it. But continue to practice your languages and work out every day.

Okay, sensei. Maybe Oberon and I will head up to Durango. Our place in Many Farms was just over a hundred miles southwest of there. She fingered her hair, dyed a brown so dark it might as well be black. "I can

Reviews for Two Ravens and One Crow

[murderbydeath · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

A really good, wholly contained short story that takes place between Tricked and... the one after Tricked.  I haven't read Tricked yet, but I had no problems following this novella at all. The author's website does say though, that events in this novella are pretty important in the next full-length book.
 
Atticus has to pay the piper for events that took place in Hammered and the Morrigan acts as a mediator and facilitator when it comes times to face down Odin himself and answer for his actions.  But things are interrupted when someone tries to assassinate Atticus and the mortal enemies must work together to chase down the assassin.
 
After a rather exciting chase, the action ends rather abruptly, but it is an excellent novella.  I listened to this one on audio and once again was stuck with Christopher Raglan as the narrator; fortunately I didn't have to listen to his bad Clint Eastwood impersonation since the story didn't involve Leif, but I was stuck with his idea of Oberon, which I've realised sounds like an impersonation of Peter Faulk playing Columbo with partial facial paralysis.
 
Curses to publishing houses everywhere that restrict audiobook editions by country.  Seriously... a pox on your ledger books.

[whybehave2002 · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

Atticus takes a break from training and heads off with The Morrigan. There is action but since it's a novella there is not a lot of meat to it...but hello? It's Atticus and where he thou goest I shall follow. Grin.

[2wondery_1 · Rating: 2 out of 5 stars]

It could have been the circumstances of my audio read, but this story didn't grab my attention.

[jshillingford_2 · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

I was very surprised to find that this novella, unlike the prior short stories, is not external to the series but a vital connection between books. Twelve years pass between book four, Tricked, and book five, Trapped. This novella not only occurs during that time, but sets up an overarching plot that will unfold in the next couple books.

Atticus wreaked serious havoc during his quest into Asgard. Many gods that were to take part in Ragnarok were killed, and Atticus knows that he has wronged those who remain. So, when Odin arranges a meeting between him via the Morrigan, he learns what the One-Eyed god demands in restitution. And he intends to fulfill the bargain.

An excellent story that has some surprises and a bit of action. Highly recommended, and absolutely necessary to fans of the series.

[theyodamom · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

Six years have passed, and Atticus is finding training his apprentice a bit hard than he expected. Never fear Oberon faithful dog companion is there to add humor and advice, sometimes more than asked for. Everything is going along well enough till the Morrigan shows her wicked face and demands Atticus leaves with her. He does but he worries about what nefarious plot she has gong now, he is forced to leave Granuaile.

Action packed and it has answers to some questions in the series. Read only after you have read Tricked and before Trapped, which time line starts 12 years after Tricked.

[jjmcgaffey · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

Not bad. It's just a short piece (novella, I think), but it adds quite a bit of information. We learn more about Atticus' past, and a bit about his immediate and slightly longer-term future - uh oh, someone who shouldn't now knows he's not dead. With six years of training (for Granauile) still to go... Actually, my biggest question is how Hearne is going to incorporate this info into the next book - because it's kind of necessary for readers to know, even if they missed the novella. Well, I guess I'm going to have to go back to the series and find out... such agony! Interesting to read, though I wouldn't call it fun. I think I would reread it only as part of a complete reread of the series, which isn't on the books for a while.

[5eva5 · Rating: 3 out of 5 stars]

A novella that takes place between books four and five in the series and has the Morrigan offer to fix Atticus' hand tattoo, but in return for him seeing some Norse gods that he would rather not have seen again. For a 90-page story, it does manage to fill in some blanks in the series. I wouldn't call it essential, but it does help with understanding a little more about Granuaile's training, a lot more about the Morrigan, and assists in segueing into the events that are sure to come in future installments.

[mamzel_1 · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

Six years have passed since Atticus has begun to train Guanuaile and has been summoned to a meeting with Odin who wants Atticus to help him with the ultimate battle, Ragnarok, since he was responsible for the death of many of the Nordic gods. Freyja tries to kill Atticus while he was meeting with Odin but he is saved by the Morrigan, a goddess who marks people for death. She has saved Atticus a number of times.

This novella marks a midway point between the fourth book, Hunted, and the fifth, Trapped. It continues the story and continues the steps to what promises to be a battle royale.

[teckelvik · Rating: 3 out of 5 stars]

This is a novella that takes place between volumes four and five of the main series. It is not crucial to understanding what happens in volume 5 (Trapped), but it really helps a lot. The two ravens of the title are Hugin and Munnin, Odin's faithful attendants, who show up in New Mexico to let Atticus know that he has been located. The crow is The Morrigan, Atticus's protector among the Tuatha de Danann. Atticus's relationship with her is always dicey - as the chooser of the slain, her idea of protecting him is often frightening and not in his long-term interests.

This was a nice little piece, which gave the Morrigan some backstory and personality, which was nice. It also made sense of what the Aesir are up to in Trapped - they still hate Atticus's guts, but Thor's death has left them vulnerable, and getting Atticus to fulfill Thor's role in taking out some of their worst enemies is more important than the purely emotional satisfaction of ripping him to little shreds. Freya vehemently disagrees, and this novella begins to bring out her role as a goddess of war, not just a pretty face. (Major complaint - every time Freya is described, Atticus says he doesn't see the attraction, her face is just "too manly," she isn't all that... She's the goddess of beauty! I'm not sure what's going on here, but there's a subtext I don't like.)

Finally, I still can't stand the way Granuaille is used in this series. She is just so sexy! She doesn't realize the effect that her skimpy outfits have on Atticus! He must run away to avoid overstepping his bounds! I think, from the presentation, that this is supposed to be funny. It wasn't, although I suppose that milages vary on this topic.

[hoosgracie · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

A novella that falls between Tricked and Trapped. While short, it was enjoyable and is important to the storyline.

[eowyna_1 · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

This novella in the Iron Druid series picks up 6 years after the end of Tricked. The Morrigan (the crow of the title) drops by, and asks Atticus to accompany her to meet with some of the surviving Norse gods. One does not say no to the Morrigan. This is a satisfying shorter piece that sets up more obligations for Atticus that will presumably play out in a later book. This novella also has plenty of action and smart-mouth dialog.

[jjvors_1 · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

Another hilarious book by [[Kevin Hearns]] in the Iron Druid series. It's actually a novella, but quite long enough to be satisfying. It picks up six years after the last novel in the series, [Tricked], ends, and continues some loose ends the Druid has with various Norse gods.

[krau0098 · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

This novella takes place between books 4 and 5 of the Iron Druid Chronicles. It was an excellent read and did a great job of capturing all the things I love about this series; lots of humor, interesting mythology, and interesting history.

Atticus is six years into training his apprentice Granuaile when the Morrigan comes for a visit. She wants Atticus to take a 2 week trip with her. Since this is the Morrigan, and you don’t say no to a goddess like that, Atticus agrees. What follows is some tattoo repair and a meeting between Gods.

As with all the previous books in this series the humor in this book is awesome and had me laughing a number of times. Oberon and Granuaile aren’t in the story a ton but they are in there enough to get their humor in. Most of the story takes place between Atticus and the Morrigan.

The Morrigan has been a reoccuring theme in these books. In this novella Hearne does something interesting, he actually lets us look into the Morrigan a bit, not as a goddess, but as a person. It was great fun to see a little of what makes the Morrigan tick and to see a little vulnerability in her. Her relationship with Atticus has always been an interesting one.

We also finally get to see Atticus and Odin face off. It is a most excellent conversation to be present for and I enjoyed it a lot.

There is a preview of the next book in the series, Trapped, which I did not read. I am not a big fan of previews and prefer to wait until the book is released to start reading it.

Overall an excellent addition to the Iron Druid Chronicles. If you are a big fan of this series make sure and pick up this novella. If you are a big fan of urban fantasy then you should definitely read this series. If you haven’t read this series than you should. It is a wonderful blend of humor, action, and mythology.

[ladycato · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

This novella takes place between Kevin Hearne's books Tricked and the forthcoming Trapped. The Iron Druid Chronicles are hilarious and fun reads--the banter and humor can most be likened to Joss Whedon--and this story is no exception. Atticus must deal with the Morrigan and a host of other disgruntled gods, and also has the chance to delve into his past and reveal how he became an immortal (but not invulnerable) druid. Hearne balances humor and depth; in particular, there's a conversation with the Morrigan about baseball (of all things!) that goes from laugh-out-loud to incredibly deep and philosophical.

It makes me all the more eager to read Trapped in a few months.