Longing

By Jennifer Koons

Josette Parks is your typical small-town girl, but she has big dreams. High school is coming to an end, and she must decide what is next. She has always wanted to get away and experience the world, but is that still how she feels? Obstacles in the form of her lifelong crush, tragedy, familiarity, and indecision have her unsure on what path to take. Will she follow her longing to spread her wings or find comfort in the place she has always called home?

• Language: English
• Publisher: Page Publishing, Inc.
• Release date: Aug 27, 2024
• ISBN: 9798893151268

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Longing

Jennifer Koons

Copyright © 2024 Jennifer Koons

All rights reserved

First Edition

PAGE PUBLISHING

Conneaut Lake, PA

First originally published by Page Publishing 2024

ISBN 979-8-89315-097-1 (pbk)

ISBN 979-8-89315-126-8 (digital)

Printed in the United States of America

Table of Contents

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Chapter 10

Chapter 11

Chapter 12

Chapter 13

Chapter 14

Chapter 15

Chapter 16

Chapter 17

Chapter 18

Chapter 19

Chapter 20

Chapter 21

Chapter 22

Chapter 23

Chapter 24

Chapter 25

Chapter 26

Chapter 27

Chapter 28

Chapter 29

Chapter 30

Chapter 31

Chapter 32

Chapter 33

Chapter 34

Chapter 35

Chapter 36

Chapter 37

Chapter 38

Chapter 39

Chapter 40

Chapter 41

Chapter 42

Chapter 43

Chapter 44

Chapter 45

Chapter 46

Chapter 47

Chapter 48

Chapter 49

Chapter 50

Chapter 51

About the Author

To My Dad. The first person to show me that following a dream doesn't always have to make sense.

Chapter 1

Small towns. Places where everyone knows you and you know everyone. A constant revolving door of the same roads, same people, and same buildings you see every single day. The comfort of it all can be like a warm blanket, but the monotony can also be suffocating. Familiarity is easy, but it can also begin to feel like an episode of Pinky and the Brain.

What should we do tonight, Brain?

The same thing we do every night.

The struggle around here becomes what to do next. Do we stay? Do we go? If we go, where to? For me and so many others, indecision has taken over. The thoughts are all-consuming, and until I make up my mind, I'm just gonna go with the flow. Living in Baileyfalls, Ohio, has never been overly exciting. Just ask anyone from here. Your typical not-too-big and not-too-small city. Popular kids, outcasts, jocks, nerds, band geeks, shy guys, and any other cliques you can think of are found here. I'm really not sure where I fit into any of it. I kind of get along with everyone and at the same time don't really fit anywhere.

My name alone puts me into my own category. Josette. Josette Avonley Parks. Named for an old vampire show character and a fictional town from a movie series my mom liked. Yeah, it's unique, but some people don't like unique. I've had my share of teasing over the years. Don't get me wrong. I have a best friend, friends, and kids at school that like me, but I've just always felt like I'm floating around on my own cloud, figuring out where to land. I have to get it together though because I graduate in a month, and I desperately need a plan.

My mom would be fine with me staying here, but my dad thinks I should spread my wings as he says. I'm just torn. The fact that I'm one of the most indecisive people in the universe does not help. I drive everyone around me insane because I cannot make a quick decision to save my life. I have vowed to work on this, but it is sadly moving very slowly. For now I'm just gonna turn off these lights, plug in my phone, and go to sleep. The alarm for school goes off too damn early, and I'm already dreading getting up.

Chapter 2

Josette! my mom yells from the bottom of the stairs. You better be awake or you're going to be late!

I groan and roll over to see my clock. My alarm doesn't go off for another two minutes, and I am not moving until I hear it. Mine and my mom's definitions of being awake differ greatly. My eyes are open, so I'm awake. According to my mom, awake is standing up and being functional, which I do not do until I hear that awful buzzer coming from the nightstand.

The clock starts to yell at me, so I sit up and debate on what to wear. Of course, I can't decide, so I head to the shower. The water feels amazing, and the thought of having to get out is beyond annoying. I would much rather stand here scalding my skin than go to school.

It's raining out, and the day drags on forever when it's like this. At least I get to leave at one since I'm a senior and have enough credits. If I'm being honest, I will miss high school. Certain moments of this year were so bittersweet. Last football game, last homecoming dance, last toilet paper war with the wrestling team, and last spirit week. They are now just realizations that the real world is coming and we will all have to jump in feetfirst to adulting.

For the moment though, I'm just gonna dry my hair, put on my minimal makeup, and dress for school on this shitty morning. I decide on jeans, a black bodysuit, and a flannel. I slip on my Converse for the day and grab my backpack.

Don't you wanna eat? my mom says to me as I fly through the kitchen.

I'm good, Mom, I reply.

It drives her perpetually crazy that I eat nothing. Sadly, I will regret every moment once I'm in English and my stomach is grumbling louder than my dad snores. You think I'd learn, but the five minutes of extra sleep are worth it. My best friend honks from the driveway. So I grab my jacket, throw up the hood, and yell bye to my mom.

What's up, I say to my BFF as I throw myself into her car to avoid getting completely soaked.

Hey, girl! she says as she laughs at my efforts to stay dry.

We have been best friends since the third grade, and no one knows me better than her. I was the new girl that year, and us having the same pair of Nikes made us fast friends. Since that day, we have had hundreds of sleepovers, a bunch of shared family vacations, and tons of secrets we keep just between us. I don't have a car yet, so we roll to school every day in the old Honda her dad got her on her sixteenth birthday. It is the epitome of a first beater car, but it gets us where we need to go.

We pull in and debate whether to go inside or drive away. Being the semi-moral girls we are, we decide against skipping and take off running for the main doors. I almost completely bust my ass walking in because the floor is soaked but manage to save myself at the last minute. After I regain my balance, I thank God I didn't just fall flat on my face because there he is. The boy I have had a crush on since the fifth grade. Luka Kelley is his name, and he is just beautiful. I know this sounds ridiculous because he is a boy, but he truly is. Thick dark brown hair, shining green eyes, tall, thin but muscular, and the cutest one-sided smile I have ever seen.

Audra, my best friend, elbows me because I'm staring. Look any harder and he is going to get a TPO, she says as she drags me down the hallway. She is the only one who knows I like him and saves me from my clumsy habits on a regular basis.

I look back one more time before turning the corner just to get my morning fix. We have had classes together, been assigned to the same groups over the years, but I honestly don't think he knows I exist. At least I get to see him in second period. He isn't necessarily one of the popular crowd, but he is a good wrestler, so the whole school is aware of who he is. He has his Italian mother's hair but his dad's pretty Irish eyes. Girls swoon over him daily, but he doesn't seem to care,