The Coaching Habit: Say Less, Ask More & Change the Way You Lead Forever

By Michael Bungay Stanier

In Michael Bungay Stanier's The Coaching Habit, coaching becomes a regular, informal part of your day so managers and their teams can work less hard and have more impact.Drawing on years of experience training more than 10,000 busy managers from around the globe in practical, everyday coaching skills, Bungay Stanier reveals how to unlock your peoples' potential. He unpacks seven essential coaching questions to demonstrate how—by saying less and asking more—you can develop coaching methods that produce great results.· Get straight to the point in any conversation with The Kickstart Question· Stay on track during any interaction with The Awe Question· Save hours of time for yourself with The Lazy Question, and hours of time for others with The Strategic Question· Get to the heart of any interpersonal or external challenge with The Focus Question and The Foundation Question· Finally ensure others find your coaching as beneficial as you do with The Learning QuestionA fresh innovative take on the traditional how-to manual, the book combines insider information with research based in neuroscience and behavioural economics, together with interactive training tools to turn practical advice into practiced habits. Witty and conversational, The Coaching Habit takes your work—and your workplace—from good to great."Coaching is an art and it's far easier said than done. It takes courage to ask a question rather than offer up advice, provide and answer, or unleash a solution. giving another person the opportunity to find their own way, make their own mistakes, and create their own wisdom is both brave and vulnerable. In this practical and inspiring book, Michael shares seven transformative questions that can make a difference in how we lead and support. And he guides us through the tricky part—how to take this new information and turn it into habits and a daily practice.—Brené Brown, author of Rising Strong and Daring Greatly.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Michael Bungay Stanier
• Release date: Feb 29, 2016
• ISBN: 9780978440756

Michael Bungay Stanier

Michael Bungay Stanier has a gift for distilling big, complex ideas into practical, accessible knowledge for everyday people that helps them be a force for good. His books have sold over a million copies, with The Coaching Habit topping The Wall Street Journal bestseller list. MBS has been featured on the blogs and social media platforms of thought leaders including Seth Godin, Tim Ferriss, and Brené Brown, and has appeared on ABC, BBC, CBC, Ted.com, and innumerable podcasts—as well as in notable publications including the Harvard Business Review, Forbes, Inc., and Fast Company. MBS is the founder of Box of Crayons, a learning and development company, that helps organizations move from advice-driven action to curiosity-led transformation. They have trained more than half a million people for clients including Microsoft, Salesforce, TELUS, and Gucci. Before establishing Box of Crayons, MBS’s accomplishments included publishing an academic article on James Joyce and a Harlequin-esque short story; playing small roles in helping invent Pizza Hut’s Stuffed Crust pizza and creating “one of the worst single-malt whiskies in existence”; and spending 20 minutes writing what has remained GlaxoSmithKline’s global vision for more than 20 years. A former Rhodes Scholar, MBS is an Australian who now lives in Toronto, Canada. You can join others committed to being a force for change at MBS.works

Book preview

This book is NOT about turning you into a coach

It’s about making you a leader, a manager, a human being who’s more coach-like. Which means building this simple but difficult new habit: Stay curious a little longer, rush to action and advice-giving a little more slowly. It’s a fast and practical read, and I think you’ll enjoy it.

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Praise for The Coaching Habit

Michael Bungay Stanier distills the essentials of coaching to seven core questions. And if you master his simple yet profound technique, you’ll get a two-fer. You’ll provide more effective support to your employees and co-workers. And you may find that you become the ultimate coach for yourself.

DANIEL H. PINK, author of To Sell Is Human and Drive

Coaching is an art, and it’s far easier said than done. It takes courage to ask a question rather than offer up advice, provide an answer or unleash a solution. Giving another person the opportunity to find their own way, make their own mistakes and create their own wisdom is both brave and vulnerable. It can also mean unlearning our fix it habits. In this practical and inspiring book, Michael shares seven transformative questions that can make a difference in how we lead and support. And he guides us through the tricky part: how to take this new information and turn it into habits and a daily practice.

BRENÉ BROWN, author of Rising Strong and Daring Greatly

What can you do to become a better leader? Michael asks and answers this question by offering aspiring leaders seven thoughtful questions that will change their leadership habits. This book is full of practical, useful and interesting questions, ideas and tools that will guide any leader trying to be better.

DAVE ULRICH, co-author of The Why of Work and The Leadership Code

Michael’s intelligence, wit, articulateness and dedication to the craft of coaching shine forth in this brilliant how-to manual for anyone called to assist others. Even after four decades of my own experience in this arena, The Coaching Habit has provided me with great takeaways.

DAVID ALLEN, author of Getting Things Done

Amid a sea of coaching books that drone on with the same old, over-used conceptual frameworks, there is a gem of hope. The Coaching Habit is a treasure trove of practical wisdom that takes a timeless pursuit—to turn every manager into a coach—and breaks it down into a simple set of everyday habits. If you are ready to take your leadership to the next level, you need this book.

JESSICA AMORTEGUI, Senior Director Learning & Development, Logitech

There are many coaching books out there that end up on the bookshelf half read. Michael Bungay Stanier’s The Coaching Habit engages you from start to finish. A simple read that is bold and direct, relatable and real, this book will change the way you communicate with colleagues at work and family at home. If you want to read one book on coaching that will resonate with you quickly and that is not overwhelming, choose this one.

JOHANNE MCNALLY MYERS, VP Human Resources, Tim Hortons

Among a plethora of books, studies and op-ed pieces about the importance of coaching and how to execute this most critical of development interventions well, it’s easy to understand why students and practitioners of the craft feel confused or overwhelmed by the array of approaches, frameworks and systems extolled as the right way. Michael Bungay Stanier has expertly cut through this confusion with his new book in a manner that is simple to understand, realistic in its intention and ultimately effective to apply. I believe this book will establish itself as a powerful and useful toolset for the professional coach, the student learner and the people manager alike.

STUART CRABB, Director Learning & Development, Facebook

This is not just a book; this is the voice in your head, the person that sits on your shoulder—guiding you to greatness. Being a great coach is more than skill; it’s a mindset, a way of being. Michael has a remarkable way of delivering that message through artful storytelling, practical examples and proven techniques. A must-have book for the coach who truly wants to make a difference.

SINÉAD CONDON, Head of Global Performance Enablement, CA Technologies

The Coaching Habit is funny, smart, practical, memorable and grounded in current behavioural science. I found it highly valuable for my own work and collaborations.

JAMES SLEZAK, Executive Director of Strategy, New York Times

Where others can overcomplicate the purpose and practice of coaching, Michael Bungay Stanier provides a practical and unintimidating approach to this essential habit of great leaders. He succinctly articulates the research behind the art of respectful inquiry and its role in fostering an authentic partnership among colleagues who are committed to doing meaningful work together. The Coaching Habit is a thoroughly enjoyable read that immediately inspired me to adopt new habits.

DANA WOODS, CEO, American Association of Critical-Care Nurses

The magic of leadership occurs in daily conversations. With The Coaching Habit, Michael Bungay Stanier gives managers an extremely simple yet powerful tool (just seven questions!) to help them coach their teams to greatness, each and every day.

ANDREW COLLIER, Head of Leadership Development, Nestlé

"Fantastic . . . and Where was this book when I needed it?" are the first thoughts popping into my head after reading this book. I’ve read countless books on leadership and coaching over my career but few brought it all together like Michael Bungay Stanier’s. I love the concepts of keeping it simple and practice, practice, practice, which are key to building your coaching habit. Michael makes what some leaders see as complex a simple process, whether you are an experienced or new people leader. Definitely a must-read book.

MONIQUE BATEMAN, SVP, TD Bank Group

The Coaching Habit is the essence of practical coaching for busy managers. No filler, no abstract theory, no tedious stories. Just everyday, practical tools so that you can coach in ten minutes or less.

MELISSA DAIMLER, Head of Learning & Organizational Development, Twitter

Bungay Stanier has it right. We are creatures of habit, and from our habits we create ourselves, our lives and the world around us. The Coaching Habit is a manual for applying the power of habit to the power of coaching to accomplish more with and through others. Do not read this book. Practice it. Apply it. Keep it on your desk and build your coaching habit.

MICHELE MILAN, CEO Executive Programs, Rotman School of Management, University of Toronto

The Coaching

Habit Say

Less, Ask More

& Change the

Way You Lead

Forever

Say Less, Ask

More & Change

the Way You

Lead Forever

title page

TO MARCELLA

Want to buy a lot of these? Fantastic. We can help. We can also customize and co-brand The Coaching Habit. Please contact us at [e-mail]

for more information.

Copyright © 2016 by Michael Bungay Stanier

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system or transmitted, in any form or by any means, without the prior written consent of the publisher or a licence from The Canadian Copyright Licensing Agency (Access Copyright). For a copyright licence, visit www.accesscopyright.ca

or call toll free to 1-800-893-5777.

Box of Crayons Press

137 Marion Street

Toronto ON Canada M6R 1E6

www.boxofcrayons.com

Catalogue data available from Library and Archives Canada

ISBN 978-0-9784407-4-9 (Paperback)

ISBN 978-0-9784407-5-6 (Ebook)

Cover and text design by Peter Cocking

16 17 18 19 20 5 4 3 2 1

Harlan Howard said every great country song has three chords and the truth.

This book gives you seven questions and the tools to make them an everyday way to work less hard and have more impact.

Contents

You Need a Coaching Habit

How to Build a Habit

Question Masterclass Part 1:

Ask One Question at a Time

1 The Kickstart Question

Question Masterclass Part 2:

Cut the Intro and Ask the Question

2 The AWE Question

Question Masterclass Part 3:

Should You Ask Rhetorical Questions?

3 The Focus Question

Question Masterclass Part 4:

Stick to Questions Starting with What

An Irresistible 1-2-3 Combination

4 The Foundation Question

Question Masterclass Part 5:

Get Comfortable with Silence

5 The Lazy Question

Question Masterclass Part 6:

Actually Listen to the Answer

6 The Strategic Question

Question Masterclass Part 7:

Acknowledge the Answers You Get

7 The Learning Question

Question Masterclass Part 8:

Use Every Channel to Ask a Question

Conclusion

A Treasure Trove of Additional Awesomeness

Acknowledgments

Landmarks

Title Page

Contents

Beginning

Cover

You Need

a Coaching

Habit

Everyone now knows that managers and leaders need to coach their people.

The leadership press has endless articles about it. Assorted gurus suggest that coaching is an essential leadership behaviour. The number of executive coaches seems to be multiplying according to Moore’s Law. Even

Reviews for The Coaching Habit

[Marjo Forsblom · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

Humorous, but concrete examples helps to implement the model and new ways of coaching to my own workplace.

[Pratik shah · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

The book gives profound insight on what most managers are doing wrong when it comes to coaching. Most organizations emphasize on coaching but rarely trains managers how to do it. This books is short but very good in doing exactly the same.

[Sidharath Tuli · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

A crisp well written book. Gives the managers and the coaches a tool kit of 7 powerful questions to ask their people to take them on a journey of self discovery.

[rajaobelinirina · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

Useful, interesting, simple to understand, simple to practise, accurate, real, .

[Rika Mariska · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

Easy to understand
Nice reading for leadership tips to implement.

[Alexander Sjöstrand · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

Loved this book alot. Great questions and well-structured. Loads of new book-tips in it too!

[ravi sharma · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

Coaching question with simple and clear understanding . I recommend every manager to read this

[Anusha · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

Good read. The book is packed with seven essential question as a part of management repertoire for building effective coaching habit for organizational success. The contents are well researched with psychological facts.

[joao · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

it's a fast read with good tips to apply in everyday life

[Anna Poletaeva · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

Really easygoing book, with examples and guided exercises to help develop those coaching habits. Loved the content and really useful with those research insights!

[Rajesh Akinepalli · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

A great book for anyone that hesitates to ask questions. And I really liked it because of the neuroscience and psychology research analysis and hundreds of books Micheal the quotes in this book.

[Kanishk Rastogi · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

This book is full of practical advice which can be used to adapt to your own coaching style. It provides a good framework of seven questions, and ideas on the situations where you can leverage them. There is also a meeting script which I found to be very useful. Another good thing about this book is that it morphs the key ideas from several other famous authors and books in neuroscience and psychology area in its own framework.