Breaking Point

By Roxana M. Dumitru

You think you’re all alone or you’re happily living the life you only dreamt of, but truth be that pain has a way of conceding the circumstances, this way or that. You’re going one way then the other, from one breaking point to another.
So, what’s your breaking point exactly?

A compilation of four short stories with separate yet similar themes.
1. Alice in Wonderland: Massacre of a Mad Hatter
2. Calypso: Moon light falling on my shadow
3. My guilt in gold: Toto
4. In through well: Bitten by a vampire’s spell

• Language: English
• Publisher: Roxana M. Dumitru
• Release date: Aug 13, 2013
• ISBN: 9781301389759

Roxana M. Dumitru

Roxana M. Dumitru (born 17 August 1991) grew up in Bucharest, Romania, where she discovered school not to be the perfect place she expected, thus she turned to writing. With great pauses between, she's writing even today, with the exception of going out of her comfort zone on a daily basis (be it in personal matters or in writing). She recently discovered that life is not all that bad, especially when you partake in it with a book in your hand.

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Part 1: Alice in Wonderland: Massacre of a Mad Hatter

Madness (definition) ― relatively permanent disorder of the mind; a strong emotion; a feeling that is oriented toward some real or supposed grievance

Chapter I

Configuration of a dream, the pain of reality, the blood, the gore, the feeling of exposure… Is it really worth it? As a human being you suffer all your life. Most say that happiness is essential and thus they live it, but they do not. It’s an illusion, all an illusion. We want to believe we’re happy, but it isn’t so. Happiness is impossible, love is improbable. Are we really alive, is it not just a dream where we think we feel when in truth we cannot. Maybe we’re just a figment of our own imagination. Are we really indeed real?

I don’t know. I’m confused. I don’t want this. I wish to escape, escape the harshness of everyday life, escape somewhere where I can numb myself and not be able to think anymore.

Please help me. I don’t desire to exist like this anymore. The pain is unbearable, life itself is insufferable. Why can’t we just be in a world without this harsh suffering we are required to experience? Rejection, unhappiness, pain, the continuous stabbing of our heart whenever something makes us think why this happened to us specifically and not someone else.

I crave for a way out, an escape route. Yes, that’s the easiest way to get rid of it. People may think that all this just shows how much of a coward I am, but can’t I just be that said coward? When you suffer and suffer and experience nothing else but disappointments and hurting, can’t you be allowed to get away from it all? Just like all the mad people out there that ultimately found their solace in an imaginary world?

They finally found their place away from everything, but stupid people that consider themselves as normal do nothing but try to bring them back to the real world, to cure them. All they want though is to help them prolong their misery, just so they – the mad ones – wouldn’t be the only ones that are in a somewhat happy place.

I found my happy place too you know, sometime ago in fact. A place some dubbed Wonderland. There I could finally feel free. I didn’t have to worry about anything since I could finally be who I always wanted to be…me. I was content some can say, though I know the best that happiness doesn’t exist. I hoped and still hope like an idiotic fool who never got to learn his or her lesson, but in my case, no matter how many times I go through horrifying matters, I still remain at the just started to get acquainted with stage.

Wonderland was the first place ever where I could feel at peace and not worry about unnecessary things or feel the piercing drench of pain that occurred on a daily basis, as a consequence of the most insignificant interactions. Hurt is everywhere, hurt will exist for all eternity and it will happen at any given moment without warning or without there being hope of it ever stopping, thus my new happy place was perfect to get away from it all.

But in reality I was not alone. If I was, the void would have made me suffer ever the more. However, the new comrades, that I have had the pleasure of getting to know, were just like me and so we understood each other better than anyone else. We made ourselves a proper home in Wonderland.

Chapter II

Unfortunately those people thought they knew better and thus Wonderland was classified as my illusion, my fantasy, and a madness which I couldn’t get rid of. And I had to get out of it or else it may affect me in the worst feasible form.

They didn’t get it though and I didn’t even try to make them. They weren’t worth it, they never were and never will be and I was happy with all my new friends: the March Hare, the Hatter, Twiddle Dee and Twiddle Dum, even the Red Queen and many more. I know it sounds like madness, all the characters from the famous Alice in Wonderland? You know the one by Lewis Carroll? All of them in the same room and real, true lunacy I tell ‘ya.

But you know? I discovered the so called dreams that Alice had, weren’t dreams at all, they were real and they were also perfect, my wonderful world, my Wonderland.

It also proved to be rather zealous, the small fact that my name was also Alice, of course, but that doesn’t mean you must not believe what all those superfluous people say. The fact that one may or may not trust something, which of course others may not approve of, does not automatically classify them. As I had been, a crazy person, a lunatic that must be cured and saved, but now we are getting to an entirely different point.

The fact was that I was happy, for the first time in over a decade and now people desired for me to return to my old self. And you know what? I didn’t want to. We are human beings after all and this species being far superior, thus extremely intelligent in comparison to other living creatures, gives us a choice in all such matters. And this is all so very ironic, for the same rules that should be applied to us are not taken into consideration for the simple fact that you are not in your right mind to do so. These same things, these same stupid reasons are used in all kinds of different situations.

When an old lady had died and left all her fortune to a niece that appeared out of nowhere (that truly is her long lost niece, mind you!), but her ever so kind relatives contest her decision saying that she was not in her right mind at the time and that said fortune actually belonged to them, this among other stuff is also classified as one such circumstance. I purely believe that our planet Earth is full of rules and contradictions. And why shouldn’t it be, now that I think about it, after all we are one heck of a selfish sort…

Chapter III

Another point in the whole matter, that I would like to bring up, was how all these rules were made for a certain stereotype, which nowadays I must say are fairly common in the world and by this I mean the flawless Barbie Doll type and the infamous jock-model-superstar (secretly gay) Ken type. If you do not belong to one of these special class clone-circles you are obviously a nut job in the making fit for a brand new/old (whatever) nuthouse or even better said: rehabilitation hospitals.

This is a sad, sad