Mean It Book 3 Fascination Series

By Sky McCoy

Life is not always what Dorian Hart expected. Dorian collects bad news like the headlines on a news feed. Breaking News. Or the lead story in the morning papers.
Just when Dorian thinks his life will be easy, he's found love, and he can handle whatever comes his way, he's thrown a curve ball and he thinks he doesn't have what it takes to get back in the game of life. Or does he?
Will Jeremy be able to handle what Dorian is ready to reveal to him?
This is the final book in the Fascination Series and it has a HEA.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Sky McCoy
• Release date: Dec 3, 2020
• ISBN: 9781005901899

Sky McCoy

Hi, my name is Sky McCoy and I write gay M/M romantic fiction. My books are steamy, erotic, romantic, with lots of angst and drama men may face if they are in love. I write about love between men because I believe in the "Freedom to Love." If you are gay or straight, you may enjoy reading my books because "Love is Love."

Book preview

Cover by Natasha Snow

Edited by Ann Attwood Editing and Proofreading Services

Contact me at [e-mail]   if you want to chat or review my books. You can sign up for my  newsletter to get advanced information for free books. And check out my website for upcoming books. The Summer Heat Series is published and you can get it in boxed set too. All four books in the Boys with Toys series are published in eBook and paperback.

To keep up with Sky McCoy’s books published, visit my website. And please leave a review so I can keep bringing you books you enjoy reading.

Copyright 2020

Copyright © 2020 by Sky McCoy

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles or reviews. Please do not participate in or encourage the piracy of copyrighted materials in violation of the author’s rights. Purchase only authorized editions.

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are the product of the author’s imagination. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events, or locales is entirely coincidental. No reproduction of this book part or whole is permitted. This book should not be scanned, or distributed in any printed or electronic form without the author’s permission.

Chapter 1 

Dorian

How could I have been such an idiot? Everything I’d ever wanted had been right here sleeping with me, my butt pressed against Jeremy’s hard length, one of his arms wrapped tightly around my waist and the other one between my legs. I didn’t want to face him because I didn’t want him sucking my nipple getting me hard, and I’d tried to hide that I’d been sore where the biopsy needle had entered. It had finally healed, but was still somewhat sore and worrisome to the touch.

Jeremy had kissed my back, nipped my shoulder, and whispered in my ear in the middle of the night, saying, Turn around and let me see your face, Green Eyes. I want to make sure I’m not dreaming.  

Jeremy had been so passionate, caring, and sensual since I’d been with him this past week. However, I’d been aloof and distant, except when we slept together.   

I’d turned and we smiled at each other. He’d pulled me close where our cocks met, slick with pre-cum, and hard against the other. Jeremy threaded his fingers through my hair. You’re so beautiful, Green Eyes. We can’t go through another gut-wrenching breakup. I don’t think I can handle it again.

Jeremy placed his hand over my stubble and kissed along my jaw, and I moved closer, sliding into his hard chest. I wrapped my arms around his neck as we kissed and he held me closer where I could feel the thumping of his cock against mine as he groaned into my mouth.   

It had been wonderful living with Jeremy for these few days, and I’d forgotten about everything including what I didn’t want to face—the doctors and what they might tell me that would send my world crashing about me, and spinning out of control—and then I’d revert to being me, doing something typical and stupid.

I’d needed time to myself and Jeremy gave me that when he decided to go into work each morning, even though all he’d wanted to do was lie in bed with me, and cuddle.

I’d craved that too, but both he and I knew that I didn’t want to be at my apartment now that I had two unwanted and unneeded visitors who I’d probably have to dispossess soon, especially since they didn’t know when to leave. Eric and Phillip had turned my quiet comfortable apartment into a honeymoon villa without a maid.

The few days I’d gone there to collect my mail, I had to clean and place dishes into the dishwasher, and the smell of dried cum on their clothes and old Chinese food left in boxes, I didn’t know what smelled worse.

After I’d cleaned up, I’d text Phillip and received one in return.

Dorian: Phillip, clean up your fucking shit and stay out of my bedroom and off my bed. There’s no maid here. PS when are you leaving?   

Phillip: You are such a bitch, Dorian. You act as if you’ve never seen a dirty house.

Dorian: You are one to talk, you arrogant homeless bastard. The only bitch I’ve seen is the one who’s being fucked by Eric.

Phillip: That hurt Dorian. Kick a man when he’s down.

Dorian: You asked for it with that bitch comment.

Phillip: I’m sorry Dorian. I’ll do better.

I’d known Phillip longer than most men I’d dealt with over the years, and certainly longer than Jeremy. I knew Phillip would say anything and go back to what he’d been doing before. He never liked to change a routine, and his routine was if he didn’t have time to clean or finish a job, fuck it. It’d get completed when he felt like it. 

To keep my sanity and to keep from committing murder, I decided to stop going around to my apartment so frequently as long as Phillip and Eric were there. However, the longer I stayed away, the more they took liberties. Jeremy had said that I should go there and pack my things and come with him because the house would be finished, and our new furniture and appliances would be installed in a matter of days.   

When I knew that Jeremy had gone to work, and Parker had taken Jacqueline out with him, I would pace the floor in Jeremy’s condo, clean, and pack boxes of Jeremy’s things to give away or have them available for the movers.

I did everything I could to take my mind off of my fears.  

Jeremy didn’t know why I’d encouraged him to go in to work instead of staying with me, and I couldn’t bring myself to tell him. I didn’t want it to appear as if I’d cry on his shoulder. I didn’t want to seem weak, but there was no other word to describe my state of mind.  

Nevertheless, Jeremy would distract me each morning before he’d leave for work. He had this look in his eyes and he’d say, I want to bend you over the bed, or the couch, rim you and then push my cock deep into your tight little hole without lube or a condom, but your screaming might wake the baby, and, heaven forbid, if Parker heard someone in the bedroom scream, he might kick the door down, Jeremy joked. We both would laugh at the thought of that picture, and he’d spank me lightly on the ass before he’d left for work with me lying nude from the waist down. Lately I’d worn one of Jeremy’s tees to bed to hide the tiny mark that had been left from a puncture.

I’d been with Jeremy a week and I had been running out of clothes. Since we were to move together shortly, I needed to go home and pack some things, but knowing I’d been here with the man of my dreams, kept me from going there and having to deal with Phillip and Eric and seeing the mess they’d left, which was why I’d texted Phillip after my first visit.  

They had overstayed their welcome. I’d done and said everything I could to persuade them that they didn’t want to be there. That they should have had their own place by now. However, Eric and Phillip were like distant relatives who came for one night, but stayed for years. When I moved in with Jeremy I wanted to have some cash of my own and I’d planned to sell the apartment. I had made that known to Phillip.

Phillip acted like a brother who wouldn’t take no for an answer. The way he’d taken over my apartment, he probably thought he had squatter’s rights of some kind, since it first belonged to him. Perhaps fucking Eric when I’d been in Europe at a conference, at his insistence, had brought back fondest memories for him, and he didn’t want to give that up. 

Nevertheless, I decided to make a visit hoping when I went home to pack, they’d be gone. I didn’t relish watching Eric and Phillip’s self-satisfied, unappreciative looks, as if I was the one intruding whenever I put my key in the door of my apartment.

I had been the one to do Phillip a favor, and saved his ungrateful ass from humiliation in front of Eric. Phillip had managed to avoid one disaster after another with Eric, and I had my own adversity waiting to happen if I didn’t take care of it soon.

ANOTHER DAY HAD COME and gone, and I didn’t realize that time had passed so quickly and I hadn’t called the doctors. It was as if I wanted to do everything else but face my fears. I thought Phillip said that showing up was the hardest part. I remembered him using that adage when he wanted to convince me to go to Europe so he could have unrestricted time to fuck Eric.

He’d added in his thoughtful statement, and that’s what separates the men from the pussies. He’d said it to me when I’d refused. Now that was a joke. Phillip never had a deep thought in his life. If he had, he wouldn’t be with Eric and he’d been the biggest pussy of all, or allowed Eric to make him one.  

Because I’d thought I was in love and I wanted to prove something to Phillip, I went, and the rest was history.   

I guessed I’d take my place with the pussies this time because I was a coward. Not a coward with men, but with my own mortality.   

Turning over, I watched the clock, it was 7 a.m., and my phone lay nearby on the table along with a lamp, a bottle of lube, and condoms still in an unopened box, with the phone dead, facing me as if it was a predator waiting to swoop down on a dying animal.

All I had to do was pick up the phone and make an appointment to see the team of doctors assigned to my case, and all my fears would be over. But I wasn’t ready to face that. I hadn’t thought about how I would tell Jeremy yet.

I just wasn’t ready to have my world turned upside down. I’d convinced myself that I wasn’t prepared.

I’d either throw myself off my balcony, I chuckled at the thought. I didn’t have a balcony, I was on the second floor and the apartment was surrounded by bushes. No doubt, I’d probably land in poison ivy, my skin would swell, and I’d look hideous when someone found me, so that was out.

If I gotten a diagnosis I couldn’t handle, and had to live with the results, I’d eventually tell Jeremy what had me upset, and act like a man. My father and mother had tried to drum those words into me. Their words had never left me, and for the life of me, I tried to act as a man would, but what does that really mean?

Didn’t a man protect his family? My father never protected me. He sent me away when I needed him the most. When I needed him to understand and explain to me what was going on inside of me. I was a teenager for fuck’s sake.  

I remembered that day as if it was now, but I’d been an adolescent, and I’d been caught by my father in our back yard kissing a boy. I always wondered what happened to that boy. I knew what happened to me. My father tried his best to heal me with constant Bible verses, but never understood me, and my mother had said that she was praying for my soul. It wasn’t my soul that needed praying for, but my mind and body when they’d sent me out on a cold rainy day to live on the streets.

Listening to the shower, I expected Jeremy at any moment, dressed and ready to leave for work. He’d been respectful of my not wanting to have sex even, as he’d been tired himself, but being near each other had only intensified our desires.

I tried to mitigate his longing for the inside of my body by going down on him, sucking him until he gave up his cum three times, a record for me. However, by the look on his face, his mouth ajar, his eyes appeared to stare at me in confusion as if to say, What did you do to me? But he never voiced it.

He reached for his spent cock, narrowed his eyes, confused, and angry with himself because he’d been so hungry for an orgasm, that he’d forgotten that he set out to fuck me, and through it all, he’d come so many times that when he pulled me up